Sound Off

Apparently some interweb site is offering Bristol Palin's baby daddy, Levi Johnston, $25,000 to whip out his, er, johnson, and spank it for all to see.

A $25,000 chicken choking?

Twenty-Five Grand for liquidating the inventory?

25 G's for summoning the genie ?

Doin' the Han Solo?
Fishing with dynamite?
Helping put Mr. Kleenex's kids through college?
Playing solitaire?
Putting your thumb in the porridge?
Raining on your parade?
Varnishing the banister?
Wrestling with your emotions?
Working up a foamy lather?

Okay, I'll stop.

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Last night while watching the Top Chef judging....and I am not so enamored of any of them yet, but it was only Ep. 1.....Carlos wandered through the living room and muttered, "Your show has been cancelled."

Poor thing; he just doesn't get it.

Top Chef. Design Star.

Not the same thing.

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The Today Show, with idiot Matt Lauer, was chock-full-o-news this morning.

They kept promoting a poll they had done on whether or not it was appropriate for Michelle Obama to be seen in public wearing :::::gasp::::: shorts!

With all that's going on in the world, that was their poll?

No wonder we're getting our news from the web. At least here you can fast forward, or click off, the rubbish.

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Rush Limbaugh made yet another gay joke about Barney Frank after Barney told off one of his town hall attendees who carried the Öbama As Hitler"sign.

How can we expect regular Americans to have a civil discussion about the issues at hand when Fat-Assed-Drug-Addicted-Cigar-Smoking-Head-Up-their-Asses-Radio-Pundits-Who-Couldn't-Get-A-Real-Job-If-Their-Life-Depended-On-it make eighth grade lockerroom jokes about being gay?

I think Rush is a little too concerned with homosexual sex. I think he might be just a wee bit curious.

Too bad no one's interested.

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Dancing With the Stars.

Pffffft.

I don't get it. I don't like it. That's just me.

But I think they've skimmed the bottom of the celebrity [?] pool this season.

This year's dancers [?] have an unusaul bong: 7 of the 16 have had brushes with the law.

First up:

Tom DeLay: indicted by a Texas grand jury on criminal charges that he had conspired to violate campaign finance laws.

Kelly Osbourne: arrested for allegedly slapping celebrity blogger Zoe Griffin after Griffin made fun of the reality star's model boyfriend.
Macy Gray: arrested for stealing gasoline in 1989; caught driving under the influence; arrested for swearing on stage at a performance in Barbados.

Louie Vito: snowboarder nabbed for pot possession in New Zealand.

Michael Irvin: arrested on cocaine possession in 1996; arrested again in 2005 on an outstanding warrant and also cited for possession of drug paraphernalia possession.

Aaron Carter: arrested for possession of marijuana when he was pulled over for speeding in Texas.

Donny Osmond: never really arrested, but apparently he almost went along with a publicist's scheme to dirty up his image by saying he'd been arrested for drugs. Nice Mormon example, Donny. Plus Donny is a giant homophobe.

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Paris Hilton.

Lindsay Lohan.

That's all.