PR All-St★rs 5, Ep 9: Touched By An Angel, er, Alyssa

The designtestants are off to Coney Island and a baseball field—home to the Brooklyn Cyclones—where they find Alyssa Milano and the PR Models all wearing Alyssa Milano’s athletic wear designs from Touch by Alyssa Milano. The challenge will be to create an athleisure — elevated streetwear — look that can be worn to a sporting event, but also worn out to dinner or on a runway or catching a foul ball …

The winner this week will have their look made—after it’s modified—and sold as part of Touch by Alyssa Milano. They have one day and $200 to make Alyssa Milano happy so, without another Alyssa Milano, let’s rip …

THE SAFE

EMILY

She said she was taking a plain white ‘T’ and reworking it. She did, though I cannot see a woman cheering on her team unless she wanted her lady parts to fly out. I also didn’t get the slits in the leggings.

THE BOTTOMS

SAM

This is Sam’s wheelhouse; he does athleisure in his sleep … or something. But he also wants to redeem himself from last week’s mesh disaster so he opts to use the same mesh, that blue color I loathe, and lace to create a circle skirt—ooh, how first year design student — that is reminiscent of a cheerleader — ooh, how not the challenge.

Zanna takes a look at his piece, which is mesh in the front and lace in the back — perhaps he saw Dom’s two-sided look and thought he’d give it a go — and she dubbed it two different dresses, Sam loses the back; makes a basic dress and tacks on lace details on the shoulders and hem.

WHAT HE SAID

This is really athleisure couture.

WHAT I SAID

This is really an ice-skating dress for a girl just starting to ice skate.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Kristen Cavallari called it gorgeous, and had a great silhouette and she loved the lace and it was all so beautiful … for a cocktail party, not a game. Alyssa agreed and said it was wrong for the challenge wand was kinda pissed that Sam didn’t adhere to the constraints; she called the look a slap in the face. Isaac, though, said, “This girl loves that dress.” — to which Alyssa said, “Thank you Miss Isaac,” and he replied, “It’s Missus.” — while the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ said she would wear that to a game because, to her, it was athleisure; Isaac reminded her that she’d probably prefer it with fur or feathers; the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ also, however, pointed out that it was too simple and not very well executed.

KEN

He’s a wee bit tired of making gowns so he says he’s up for the challenge and will do a hoodie, in black and white lace … apparently for night games … in the bedroom? But ken has all kinds of issues and, according to Zanna, too many ideas.

He didn’t buy red thread; he sewed part of the look wrong; he has to rip it apart. He storms out … well, he summer storms out because it wasn’t all that; it was just drama because the next day he’s back and scrambling to finish his look in two hours and scrambling to sew on a couple of black lace pockets in the front.

WHAT HE SAID

My look is a little more ‘downtown’ than the girl I normally dress.

WHAT I SAID

Those last minute pockets are just bad, and that dress underneath seems like an odd choice, and then for some reason, as she’s walking away, I get a vibe that it’s kind of a nurses uniform or something. It was a mess.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Alyssa loved that it was sleeveless but said she, too, hated the pockets. Worse than that: the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ was disappointed that this was a Ken Creation; bad proportions, bad length for the skirt; bad. Guest judge, reality show star and now a designer… uh huh … Kristen Cavallari, loved the simplicity of it and said she “could see a million girls wearing it.” Isaac said, “Could you see a million girls wear it, or do you see a million girls wear it?” He said girls already have that look, only theirs doesn’t look so cheap.

LAYANA

Another week and another challenge where Layana says she has this … this is what she does … this is who she is; Oy! But then, because she’s been Bottom Feeding for a while now, she takes on a pant that has thousands and thousands of pleats in dozens of panels because she wants to throw everything at the judges.

Sadly, Zanna thinks it looks more sportswear — high-end sweat pants would have been more accurate — and then Layana does herself no favors when she makes a simple white top and the scraps it for some more heavily details sports-bra-t-shirt smashup.

WHAT SHE SAID

She looks so cool, so high fashion!

WHAT I SAID

The top seams too rigid for the pleated sweats and, again, I loathe that shade of blue.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ loved the pleating detail but thought the proportions of the top were a bit off; she also felt that because Layana was in the bottom so many weeks, that she tried to do too much and created a visual overload … huh, me and GC … GMTA.  Kristen Cavallari also loved the leggings … just not with that top. Isaac sounded the same bell: good leggings, bad top, while Alyssa said it just wasn’t “game wear.”

THE TOPS

ASHA

She’s riding high on last week’s win and has a cool idea; she’ll take the look of a man’s baseball jersey and turn it into a skirt, topping it off with a sports bra. My first thought is: Is a sports bra supposed to be seen? Zanna loves the idea of the skirt but says nothing about the top, so it’s sports bra mania at Asha’s work table.

WHAT SHE SAID

My model looks sporty and badass.

WHAT I SAID

It’s cute, though as I see it, I think it’s kind of a costume, and, yeah, I don’t like the sp0rts bra. I mean, I cannot walk around Camden with a jockstrap on the outside … well, I could, but I don’t wanna spend one more night in the Crazy Tank.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ loved it, thought it very creative, but wasn’t keen on the buttons down the skirt front; it was also a bit too junior for her. Isaac also disliked the buttons, though he thought the skirt idea was clever, while Alyssa agreed about the skirt and agreed with me about the sports bra. Kristen Cavallari liked the sports details: the striping and the mesh, but also agreed that a better top would have made the look.

DOM

Her ideas scare me a bit; she wants to do a bat-wing dress with a detachable piece along the bottom in mixed fabrics. And here I thought Layana had too many ideas. But, as usual, the mix of fabrics seems to work, and she, once again … like last week, created a kind of peek-a-boo back.

Zanna loved the back and called the detachable hem — taking the dress from long and dark to short and lean — was unique.

WHAT SHE SAID

I love my look … it’s very sophisticated.

WHAT I SAID

It’s kind of mummy from the front, and the head scarf is odd, but the back is, once again, a wow.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Alyssa loved the detachable hem — and I thought it looked so much better short — and called the look brilliant. Kristen Cavallari also liked it better short, but thought it too high-fashion to be game-worthy. Isaac disagreed; he loved the drama of the longer length; and he loved the shapelessness of it, though it still hugged the model’s body. The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called it a 1920s tennis dress-and by that she meant she loved it; she loved, again, the back detail and the way Dom mixes patterns so well.

KINI

He’s doing three pieces: a coat, some jeans, and a simple top. He also bought the same mesh fabric that Sam used this week—and the same mesh fabric Sam used last week—because, he says, he wants to show Sam how to make mesh work. I seriously wish these two would f**k already and stop sniping at each other like schoolboys with a crush.

Anyway … Zanna loved the jeans, but worried that the coat might be too sportswear and not athleisure enough for the judges.

WHAT HE SAID

It’s so different for me to do ready-to-wear with no drama in it.

WHAT I SAID

I hate Capri pants … or whatever you call that length. But I like the look and the coat is cool.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Kristen Cavallari called the jacket smart and creative, though she thought the rest of the look wasn’t all that.  Alyssa also loved the coat, especially the pleat in the back that made it more fashionable. The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called the coat chic and loved the splash of color, but she took issue with the crotch of the jeans. Isaac marveled that Kini, who usually does dresses, pulled off a coat and jeans and a shirt; he praised Kini’s versatility.

Sam, though he swung at it and missed, is safe; Ken, though he fouled out, and took a walk, is also safe. And that leaves us with Layana, who committed her third strike and was sent home.

Howsabout those sports metaphors? Not bad for a queen who can’t throw!

As for the tops: Asha made it to first base despite the button, while Dom rounded second with her dramatic look. But it was Kini who scored a home run this week, his first All-Stars win.

When Sam said, “If I don’t at least end up in the top in this challenge, I might as well go home,” and then finished in the bottom, I kinda hoped the producers would say, “Bye Sam.”

And if they didn’t send him home for that, they should’a booted him for donning his drab circle skirt and spinning like a dreidel.

Line of the Night goes to ken, who knows nothing about sports:

“I don’t know too many sports, but I figured red, black and white had to be somebody’s team.”

Now, as for his exit: that look he gave Dom when she asked if he was all right scared the bejeesus outs me. I’ve been told that I give Good Dirty Looks, but I ain’t got nothing on Ken. That said, his walk-out was a TCV Walkout because if he wasn’t coming back the producers would have sent Alyssa or Zanna in to tell the designtestants and to clear out his stuff. Plus, Ken has to stay in the PR Guest suites with the other designers so even they knew he wasn’t really leaving. Give me real drama, not this made up shiz.

I wanted to smack Sam for his eye-roll when Kini was bragging about his critique because Sam is always bragging about how much the judges adore him; he even bragged about what Kristen Cavallari and the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ said about his look and apparently missed it when Kristen said it was a cocktail dress and not athleisure!

Emily. Emily. Emily. You had one win, which I think was given to you, and always seem to be Safe. It’s time to go. I’m tired of the blue hair—in that blue—and the pink eye shadow. Go home, dear.

What did YOU think?

PR All-St★rs 5, Ep 8: Drama! Or Not ...

We start this week with the designtestants strolling the streets of New York looking for the Drama Book Shop — a bookstore all about Broadway … pinch me, I must be dreaming! I started thinking, though, Drama? Is it going to be drama on the show or on the runway?

Alyssa meets the designers alongside Laura Michelle Kelly, who is currently starring in "Finding Neverland" on Broadway. She tells the designers that their challenge will be to create a modern runway look for a classic female character from literature.

And they have $200 and one day, so let’s rip …

THE SAFES

KEN — Snow White.

Now, I’m not saying the look should have been white, but since when does a red suit say Snow White? I got Red Dragon Lady.

EMILY — Snow Queen

It was Glitter Rock Icicle.

THE BOTTOMS

SAM

The Little Mermaid

He goes literal, choosing a netting fabric—because she used to be a mermaid, y’all—and patch-working some glittering fabrics onto the look in the colors of the sea. Oh, and it’s a crop top and a pencil skirt.

Zanna told Sam she expected to see a sense of freedom in the look, as when the Little Mermaid leaves the sea … or Sam leaves the competition.

WHAT HE SAID

I do notice that there is some weirdness going on.

WHAT I SAID

It’s a hodge-podge quilt that isn’t quite finished.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ liked the modernity of it, but called Sam out on the execution, and pointed out the “weirdness going on” that Sam pretended not to see. Alyssa called the netting too stark and said it cheapened the look; she then said Sam phoned it in and she found that insulting. Isaac called the top “junior,” and not All-Stars; then he struck deeper, calling it “kindergarten arts-and-crafts.” Guest Judge Brad Goreski liked the skirt, and the panels, but said the top was bad. The other Guest Judge, Kesha, liked it. Oy.

LAYANA

Belle

Again Layana has this one, though every time she says that she’s in the Bottom. But this time she has Belle who moved from a farm to a mansion, and Layana moved from a farm to a city so she’s got this. Yawn.

She creates a story that The Beast is taking Belle to a polo match in Brazil — I know, WTF? — and Zanna looks at it and says she’s seen it before, and it wasn’t good. But Layana loves it all the more after the fitting so … Bottom here she comes.

WHAT SHE SAID

My favorite part is when she’s spinning.

WHAT I SAID

It’s ladies who lunch … at Sears.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Kesha said she was getting a vintage vibe — as in “seen it before,” perhaps — but also called it super boring. Alyssa thought there was too much fabric and pattern and color goi9ng on in the skirt. Isaac simply said this doesn’t look “polo in Brazil,” while Brad Goreski simply said it could have been better. The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called the colors too jarring and said there was a lack of taste. When Brad added that it was a “pretty dress,” Isaac snapped back, “It’s a pretty dress for a sale rack.” At Sears.

ALEXANDER

Cinderella

Alexander went too literal, I think, in creating a gown for Cindy; I mean, a couple of field mice made her a gown in the story and Alexander thinks he can top that? Bibbety-bobbity. Boo-Hoo. His fabrics are dark and dated and Zanna warned him that it was too safe and not at all modern.

WHAT HE SAID

I love that you can see it shimmer.

WHAT I SAID

Asha called it when she said it was Evil Stepsister.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ reminded Alexander that Cindy was young and fresh and this look was sophisticated and old; she added that it was depressing. Brad Goreski said this is the Year of the Booty — I hadn’t gotten that memo — and then said Alexander’s booty was not so good; Alyssa said it looked safety-pinned together and kina beauty pageant. Isaac called the back off-putting and the neckline tacky. Kesha then asked Isaac to be nice while she called it a bridesmaid look. How is that nice?

THE TOPS

KINI

Alice in Wonderland

Alice makes his think denim and ruffles and makes me think Kini thinks Alice is a country singer. But he soldiers on and it’s a look … simple in the front and drama bringing up the rear. Zanna loves the look but worries about the proportions of the back, which Sam says is Lady Bug; it’s not, it’s butterfly.

WHAT HE SAID

The shift dress is cool, but the ruffle is the dramatic piece.

WHAT I SAID

I’m really getting butterfly as it walks, not Alice in Wonderland. But it’s cool and modern.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Isaac loved the denim pieces but called the ruffle a costume piece; he does say this look screams “fashion,” and he lovedlovedloved the white collar The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ begs to differ, loving the strict front and the playful back; fun, witty and smart. Brad Goreski brings up the obvious: business in the front, party in the back; Kesha runs with that, calling it a fashion mullet, but like a whimsical gift, too. Alyssa loved the fantasy adventure the dress inspired.

DOM

Tinkerbell

I like Dom because Dom thinks about the challenge; she’s making Tink a riff on a mod 60s London vibe; a girl who hangs out with the boys. And she’s using every single print in Mood to create her own textile for a shirtdress and pants.

Zanna likes it, but wonders how much Tinkerbell is in the look.

WHAT SHE SAID

I love my look … it’s sophisticated … chic … fun.

WHAT I SAID

The prints are crazy, but it’s very cool and the back is fabulous.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Brad Goreski loves the midriff — perhaps it’s the Year of the Midriff, too? And he loves that there was skin in the front and skin in the back … which sounds a little Hannibal Lecter to me. Kesha was obsessed with the look and thought she was the coolest girl. The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ said the pants were exceptional and called it bold, modern and fresh. Both Alyssa and Isaac loved the little details, like the striped hem on the inside of the long shirt, though Isaac thought it a bit sportswear.

ASHA

Rapunzel

She sees Rapunzel as a rebel, wearing pants as she’s racing down that tower, but then with an over-skirt to look more “princess.” It’s an interesting take, but Asha has but one fabric and that worries me. Zanna, on the other hand, likes the idea but warns Asha to finish it properly.

WHAT SHE SAID

I think she looks like a cool, modern take on Rapunzel.

WHAT I SAID

The overskirt became a tail, and that model slouch does it no justice.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Alyssa loved the duality of the pants and the skirt, while the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called it fresh and regal; she was not a fan of the sheen and the print on the fabric, though, Isaac disagreed; he loved the fabric and loved that the model wore flats. Brad Goreski wishes the flat had been dressier and Isaac said he wants to wrestle Brad to the ground over a flat show. I think maybe he wanted to wrestle for other reasons but I digress. Isaac did say that he loved that the messy brad was reflected in the tail which fell to the ground and I got it; it worked now.

Sam gets saved … and for that? So, it’s down to Layana’s Lack of taste, or Alexander’s Old Lady Look. And, well, Old Lady goes home.

As for the Top Spot, it comes down to Asha’s Rapunzel and Dom’s Tinkerbell and, much to my shock, Asha gets the nod this week.

I would have given the win to Dom, again, because her look was really great and Asha’s was too simple for my taste, but then I am only a blog-o-sphere judge. On the losing side? After Sam’s nudist d-i-saster and this week’s patchwork mess, he should have gone home. Alexander’s wasn’t awful — it wasn’t good — but it was better than Sam’s.

The Kini-Sam fight continues, with Ken stirring the pot about Kini making the top of Sam’s look in the group challenge and not getting credit for it. I want these two bitches to Dynasty-style cat-fight in a lily pond and get over this mess.

I did like when Sam said, “I won two challenges. How many have you won?” And Kini replied, “I own three challenges on Project Runway and went to Fashion Week.”

Now …Sam’s own runway look … that nerdy tween Twi-hard … was ridiculous.

LINE OF THE NIGHT

Alexander Pope, on getting Cinderella:

“I can totally relate to Cinderella because we are both princesses and I am a gorgeous tall blond.”

Note to Brad Goreski, from one gay to another: Saying "OMG" out loud is over. M’kay?

Next week? Ken storms out! Is he off the show??!? I doubt it because the next scene in the preview showed his look on the runway. Unless he stormed out after the runway. Stay tuned.

What did YOU think?

PR All-St★rs 5, Ep 7: Ah, The Old Switcheroo!

Oh the twists and turns of PR All-Stars!

Alyssa Milano inside Mood! Yes, because, as she tells the designtestants, they have been making some pretty awful fabric choices, so this week she’s handing out envelopes telling them what fabrics to use.

The designers will use these random fabric choices to create a high-end evening resort look, but the trouble is, most of the designers — save Alexander who got upholstery fabric — like what they’ve been given so how is that a twist? Just you wait …

Alyssa Milano inside The workroom? Yes, because now she’s pulling what she calls a bait and Stitch, forcing the designers to give up the fabrics they’ve chosen and use another designers’ textiles.

Cue terror; let’s rip …

THE SAFES

left to right

ASHA went from Neoprene to Dom’s Jersey Knits

It’s cute, though it gathers weirdly at the floor … and there’s a turban. Is Joan Collins a guest judge?

KINI went from Brocade to Sam’s Lace

Evening wear is a sheer lace cover-up over what looks like a swimsuit? Is there a buffet in the pool?

ALEXANDER went from Upholstery Fabric to Denim

Yee Haw!

THE BOTTOMS

EMILY

She was given Denim and then took Alexander’s Upholstery fabrics and then cried and whined about them. Of course, she was stuck with a little bit of red fabric and a whole lotta sheer fabric covered in large polka dots.

She is stuck, and angry and bitter and weepy, and when Zanna sees the look that mood doesn’t change. Zanna wants it amped up, sexy, resort evening.

WHAT SHE SAID

I think she looks adorable.

WHAT I SAID

Uh oh. There are some good ideas, but the execution is awful.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ wasn’t feeling the crop-top, the cut-out, or the midriff, and wished Emily had done more with the sheer; she did, however, give Emily props for standing by her design and said that it had a “good attitude.” Isaac loved the top, while guest judge, Alyssa wishes the shorts were more high-waisted because there was a lot of skin. Isaac suggests during deliberation that Emily be removed from the Bottom and made a Safe.

LAYANA

She was given Lightweight Cotton but then snagged Ken’s Silk Charmeuse.

And so here we are: another week, another challenge, and one more time for Layana says this is her win because no one can do what she does … like make a jumpsuit.

An old-fashioned gown of a jumpsuit, according to Zanna who wants Layana to infuse it with a more youthful vibe.

WHAT SHE SAID

I love the way it flows … beautiful … feminine.

WHAT I SAID

It’s a gown, still … a nightgown.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Isaac hates the shoes, and said the look needed flats because, as the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ pointed out, the hem is off and should have been to the floor, or at a higher more modern level; she also said the dress was made for a flat-chested girl, and Broadway star Megan Hilty — love her — agreed; she loved the back but was afraid of major side boobage since the front was cut so narrow.

VALERIE

She was handed a bolt of Linen fabric and then forced to choose Layana’s Lightweight Cotton because some of Layana’s colors were similar to the ones she’d chosen.

And she, too, will be making a jumpsuit and adding a turban because the look is for resort-wear for an episode of Dynasty circa 1983, I guess. Zanna is less than impressed and says the look needs a wow, and a lotta cleavage doesn’t necessarily fill the bill.

WHAT SHE SAID

It’s comfortable … easy … simple.

WHAT I SAID

Valerie describes it like it’s a tampon, which may be accurate because this look shouldn’t be seen in public.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called it sweet and loved the back though the fabric appeared cardboard-like. Alyssa wasn’t feeling it at all, calling it too simple and saying only the giant cleavage path was at all evening, Isaac suggested the look lose the pockets and the necklace and the turban and then go back to the workroom and star over … say on a Sumnmer’s Eve? He said it was retro and not vintage and he loathes retro. Megan Hilty loved the back … that’s all.

THE TOPS

SAM

He was given Lace and then, as the last to choose, had to switch with his arch-enemy Kini for Brocade. And he bitches about the colors and the prints and the fabrics and the lighting and his hair and anything else he can bitch about … except for making another jumpsuit because, as Kini points out, that’s what he does. And Zanna points it out, too, but calls this look Disney Cruise.

And she’s right; the jumpsuit is hideous and so Sam bitches about it and flops on his work table then scraps the look and drapes another brocade on the mannequin, puts a couple of seams in it and calls it “Gorgeous.”

WHAT HE SAID

I am at a loss for words at how good my dress looks.

WHAT I SAID

I wish he’d be at a loss for words more often, but let’s talk the dress: it moves well, but it’s a simple summer dress and nothing more. It’s less Lido Deck and more Garbage Barge.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

Isaac liked that the brocade wasn’t a heavy scary brocade and called the look fresh. Alyssa, who Sam used to love, called it homemade, and not in a good way; she was bored, and said it was the same silhouette and that only the fabric — which Sam didn’t pick, made it interesting at all. Megan Hilty again loved the back but hated the high front slit. The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ loved it from the side profile and called it buoyant.

KEN

As the winner last week, Ken was given his fabric choice first: silk charmeuse, but at The Switch, for some odd reason, he took Asha’s Neoprene, a fabric he doesn’t like in a color he hated. Um, okay?

But he’s going big silhouette, big gown, big color, all things Zanna finds to be wrong. But, as usual, Ken does Ken and keeps the look relatively the same — he does go one shoulder — and it’s … big.

There was a moment of terror when it became Ken’s turn to bust a zipper before the runway but Ken, yes, Ken, stayed calm and fixed it in a jiffy.

WHAT HE SAID

I’m a little bit nervous because it’s simple.

WHAT I SAID

It’s sort of ball gown to me and I am with Ken about the color. But he worked it to his benefit I guess.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ said it was totally Ken, and loved that he had a clear aesthetics, while she did think the draping at the top was too heavy; she wants more. Isaac, on the other hand, was crazy about the whole design, including the color and urged Ken to keep doing it. Alyssa loved that he took a sporty fabric and turned it into a gown, while Megan Hilty loved the color and the shape and the texture.

DOM

She was thrilled when she was given Jersey Knits but a little less so when she took Valerie’s linen. But she works it, taking two of the fabrics, cutting them into strips, and making her own striped fabric. There were some scary moments, I’ll call them Beetlejuice moments, when the striped fabric looked like a coat, but Dom used a simple white for the top, and then threw on a black-and-white belt.

Zanna’s one critique: Don’t be safe. Dom wasn’t safe, she was on top.

WHAT SHE SAID

I love my look! I love the striping and the drape.

WHAT I SAID

I didn’t quite get “evening” but I got beach-y edgy resort. Loved it.

WHAT THE JUDGES SAID

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ was shocked to learn that the striped fabric was created by Dom — “What? No! Stop!” — and called the look incredible; she loved that the top had all the drama in the back while the skirt had all the drama in the front and said this look makes her want to see a Dom collection. Isaac loved the textile and the striped belt, but said it was a lot of look, while Megan Hilty loved the drape of the back and said it took her breath away. When Alyssa mentioned that the striped fabric looked like a beach towel Dom said she it was intentional.

With Emily saved by Isaac it comes down to Dueling Jumpsuits: Layana’s jumpsuit that she was sure would win, or Valerie’s one-note jumpsuit that was neither here nor there.

Valerie gets the axe and Layana lives to brag about herself for another day.

As for the winner, it comes down to Ken and Dom — Sam’s nothing dress is not considered worthy. Ken scores for the drama abut Dom gets points for the wow and the creativity … and gets her first win of the season. And the added bonus of having Megan Hilty wear her look at a Broadway event … Broadway Goes To The Hamptons? Maybe.

I loved when Alexander revealed his Upholstery card and even Alyssa was like, WTF? And then Alexander also gets the Line Of The Night when he said this about Kini’s look using Sam’s fabrics:

“Kini may be in trouble [but] it’s not his fault he had three yards of sh*t crappy lace.”

I am glad Dom one because this look was a standout in a sea of kinda one color nothingness. And I agree with the Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ that a Dom Collection would be cool.

I am also glad Valerie took her defeatist ass home; her constant whining was gnawing at my last nerve. And when she seemed annoyed that Dom won using her textiles I screamed at my TV:

“Maybe it was your fabrics, but there wasn’t a chance in hell you would’a used them better.”

And the turbans? Ken? Honey? No. Not even you could pull it off.

Next week Fairy Tales … and I don’t mean the stories Sam and Kini tell about one another as their Bitchfest rages on.

What did YOU think?