I Didn't Say It ...

Maria Shriver, journalist, reacting to Buttker’s speech:

“I’m happy for Mr. Butker’s wife, Isabelle, that she’s happy in her chosen vocation/ Good for her. But she should let her husband know that not all women can make that choice, even if they wanted to. Most families can’t get by without both parents working/ It’s a luxury to get the choice she has gotten. The vast majority of women have to put food on the table, while also raising kids, caring for aging parents, running companies, running for office to give us a better world … the list goes on! And men, well, are they really the ones who set the tone for the culture? Can we not all set the tone for the future? Women, men, gay, straight—of course we can! I will not tell Mr. Butker to stick to kicking but I would suggest next time he speaks to women first and listens to someone with a clearer take on where most women find themselves in 2024.”

Sadly, men like Butker don’t listen … especially to women. But he can live the life he wants, and have the kind of wife he wants, but he cannot say that women need to strive to be married and have children because that’s their truth.

The truth is that Butker is a professional athlete and a lot of professional athletes cheat on their wives with other women, and perhaps in Butker’s case, other men. So, when he decides to dump his stay-at-home-raise-my-children-do-as-I-say wife to get with his latest piece, know that since you wanted her never to work, that you will be talking care of her financially for the rest of her life and yet will no longer have any say in how she lives that life.

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Lindsey Graham, South Carolina's GOP Senator and former Miss Cotton-Tail 1973, on Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito flying an upside-down American flag at his house following the insurrection at the US Capitol:

“I don’t know what role―he said his wife was insulted and got mad―I assume that be true, but he’s still a Supreme Court justice. And, you know, people have to realize that moments like that, to think it through.”

Alito and 'think it through'? Not ever happening. And, like any good rightwingnut, Alito blamed his wife for putting up the flag after a dispute with neighbors over “insulting language” on yard signs. Yeah, Mrs. Alito climbed a ladder to the second floor of their house and hung that flag.

Fuck off, Sammy.

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Patrick Mahomes, Butker’s Kansas City Chiefs teammate, giving a toast at the Time100 Gala:

"I'd like to raise a glass to a new era in sports. A era where women's sports is getting the attention it deserves. The real reason you should care about women's sports is because they're incredible. The talent, the narratives, the personalities in women's sports has it all and I think people are finally starting to figure that out. The women's NCAA championship was ESPNs most viewed college basketball game ever. I'm proud of the part my family has played in this movement. As a co-owner of the Kansas City Current, my wife, Brittany, is working hard to grow women's soccer and broaden the path for young athletes, like our daughter."

Luckily, Patrick’s wife didn’t marry Butker because then she wouldn’t be working in women’s sports, she’d be baking cookies and teaching her daughter that she’s less than men.

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Junior, responding questions about why his Daddy chickened out on testifying after saying that he “absolutely” would multiple times:

“Why would you justify this insanity? Look at the clowns that they put on there—you don’t subject yourself to that nonsense. You are going into a kangaroo court. There’s nothing more. Nothing less. There’d be absolutely no reason, no justification to do that whatsoever.”

Sure there is you coke-addled dimwit: you do it because the truth is on your side.

Unless it’s not. Then you chicken out.

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Laura Ingraham, on Harrison Butker’s misogynistic speech:

“Harrison Butker decided to use this occasion to say something that mattered. Doing what the left pretends to support, speaking his truth. Now it’s easy to forget, in our social media obsessed, materialistic world, we all fall into it, including myself, … that Heaven is really what we as Christians should be striving for here on earth. It’s certainly easy to understand why his comments made certain people very uncomfortable because they believe it’s enough to glide through life with glib references to ‘equity and inclusion’ and ‘I’m spiritual, but not religious,’ but some of them are among the most intolerant people on the planet. The powers that be here mean to make an example out of people like Harrison Butker and Riley Gaines. Dare to challenge their twisted worldview, where men can be women, and mothers and fathers are fungible, and they will try to denigrate you, isolate you, cancel you and ultimately silence you completely. Be not afraid. At a time, though, when woke secularists dominate media, corporate America, Hollywood, and most universities, being a public witness to your Christian faith? Now that takes courage because speaking out may actually mean that you lose everything.”

Oh Laura, how dumb are you? If you lived in Butker’s world you’d be at home and birthing  babies rather than at work birthing stupidity.

Don’t forget that Eva Braun, er, Laura Ingraham famously told NBA superstar Lebron James in 2018 to “shut up and dribble” after he had the audacity to criticize Hair Furor.

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Jamie Raskin, Maryland Democrat Representative, on Justice Alito being compromised and unfit to be a Supreme Court Justice:

“Justice Alito turned the flag upside down. [Hair Furor] turned the Bible upside down. MAGA turned the capitol upside down. The Roberts Court turned the Constitution upside down. Let’s set America right side up in November.”

November … Roevember … Joevember. Vote Blue.

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Nikki Haley, pandering GOP hag, has said she will vote for Hair Furor in November:

“I put my priorities on a president who’s going to have the backs of our allies and hold our enemies to account who would secure the border. [Hair Furor] has not been perfect on these policies. I’ve made that clear many, many times. But Biden has been a catastrophe, so I will be voting for [Hair Furor].”

This is the same Haley who said she’d never run against Hair Furor, and then did.

This is the same Haley who called him the worst idea for president in 2016—and even voted for Marco Rubio—but then ran to Hair Furor’s White House for a job.

This is the same Haly who said, just two months ago:

“I have no need to kiss the ring. I have no fear of retribution. I’m not worried about my political future.”

But she really wants that VP slot so, while she said she won’t kiss his ring, she clearly kissed the ... and I apologize in advance for this ... ring around his anus.

And, perhaps more importantly, she gave the middle finger to all those people around the country who voted for her even after she left the race.

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Eddie Vedder, lead vocalist for Pearl Jam, on “kicker” Harrison Butler’s commencement speech:

“He was telling men, ‘Don’t forget to puff up your chest and be more masculine. Don’t lose your masculinity.’ The irony is that when he was saying that he looked like such a pussy. There’s nothing more masculine than a strong man supporting a strong woman. People of quality do not fear equality.”

 Word. It’s just that simple.

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Jason Hackett, a Minnesota news anchor, coming out live on air after 13 years as a journalist:

"For people that really know me—my friends, my coworkers, some members of my family—this isn't some huge surprise. I've been living in a glass closet for the most part, but now I wanted to let you out there, the viewers out there that wake up with me every morning to know a little bit more about me. [In] sixth grade is when I realized, 'Wait a minute, I think I’m different.' There was a kid at a bus stop every day after school when I was waiting and I always used to stare at him and be like, 'Wow, there’s something about him that I really like. I don’t know what it is, but I really, really like something about him, 'and I think it dawned on me somewhere around fifth or sixth grade that, 'Wait a minute, I think I’m gay.' It’d be nice to think that after this story is published and after my story is told that there is another young, gay, black, or anybody of color kid out there that is like, 'Wow, he is being his authentic self and he’s not getting killed for it, he’s not getting criticized for it. He’s being his authentic self, and maybe I can also be my authentic self, maybe I can also live my truth, just like Jason is.' What me and ... everyone here on Sunrise strive for is authenticity. And I can't preach that without being my authentic self and for anyone that is watching this now who is struggling to find acceptance or struggling with their family or their friends, take it from me, a gay, Black son of immigrants, the road may not be easy. I won't lie to you and say that it is. But don't worry. Keep going. You're gonna make it."

Welcome Out, Jason, and please accept as our gift from HOMO HQ, a Copy of The Gay Agenda and the Official Coming Out Toaster Oven™.

Your words, and your actions, will definitely make it easier for other young people of color to come out and live their truth and their happiness.

Welcome out!

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I Ain't One To Gossip, But.......

What do you do if you used to be on TV and now you hawk sentimental jewelry on HSN? Well, you could drag your ass to every news outlet to report some gossip about people you don't know.

It seems former B-list actress, now D-list huckster, Jane Seymour, has decided to open her yap and add her two pence about the Arnold Schwarzenegger love child with the maid.
She says she knows there are more children out there who have Terminator DNA, and she used this used to get herself on CNN, where she said: "I was not even remotely surprised. The moment I heard it, that there was an announcement of their separation -- he was obviously jumping the gun before everyone else told the world of the news."
And then she dropped a bimboshell, which is kind of like a bombshell, only from a moron:  "From what I gather, I think there will be lots of information coming people's way. I heard about two more [out of wedlock kids] somebody else knows about. I even met someone who knows him well."
See? She knows someone who knows someone who knows him well, probably because they parked Arnie's car in Beverly Hills once.
Hey, Dr. Quinn? Heal thyself, and then STFU.

Rumor has it that newly selected 'X-Factor' judge Cheryl Cole has ALLEGEDLY been asked to dump her "boyfriend" of one year, the ALLEGEDLY light-in-the-ballet-slippers 'Dancing with the Stars' pro Derek Hough, so that so she can create a better image for herself.

Apparently a London newspaper, The Mirror, is saying that Fox executives are trying to make Cole the sex symbol of the show and bluntly asked her to break it off with Hough.
A source--and by source, I mean Derek Hough's ALLEGED ex-boyfriend--says: "Derek may be dreaming of worldwide stardom but he's seen as a small-time dancer on a TV show... and pretty uncool. TV executives are thinking that if she's going to win over Hollywood, she'd be better off doing it as a sassy and single girl-about-town."

Um, who says sassy single girl about town besides someone visiting from 1963?

But then the source backtracks, and says the execs want Cole to maybe date a different guy in Hollywood, like maybe one who isn't constantly battling the does-he-or-doesn't-he-like-the-mens rumor.
Cole is said to be devastated by the request to lose the Hough, especially since Derek held her hand while she went through a messy divorce last year and held her hair while she vomited during a bout with malaria.
Let's see, he holds your hand while you divorce and holds your hair while you puke?
Oh, honey, he's a mo. ALLEGEDLY.
UPDATE: Cole has been "let go" from 'X Factor' and will be replaced by Pussycat Dolls lead singer Nicole Scherzinger.
Now she won't have to give up her gay.


Hell hath no fury like a Kennedy woman with a cheating husband.

Isn't that the old saying? See, Maria Shriver seems to be living up to that adage.
When the story broke about their separation, it was sad enough. Twenty-five years of marriage down the tubes. But then new details began to emerge, about things like schtupping the maid, and fathering children and maybe misappropriating states funds a s governor to pay off your baby maid mama.
And who is doing all this leaking of news? Well, some folks--and by some folks, I mean TMZ, and they would know--say it's Maria Shriver who is airing the dirty laundry.
According to TMZ, a "hysterical" Maria wanted to hold a press conference after learning the truth about the true paternity of Mildred Patty Baena's son, but was convinced to just leak the story to a pair of media outlets. 

And then, just as suddenly, negative stories about Mildred began appearing in the press, and people are speculating that that kind of bad press is the kind used by PR people and media insiders. People who usually work for high-powered public officials.
One such media insider--and it may be Jane Seymour--says: "Arnold and his people have long been known to fight hard to make sure they got rid of any negative stories about him. No one is more aggressive than Arnold's team, which explains why he has been able to hide this story for over a decade."
And a A-list publicist--and by A-list publicist, I mean, mailroom clerk at CAA--says: "Anyone that thinks these stories are just popping up by themselves is naive. This is obviously an attempt to distract attention from the man who caused all this and direct it to Maria, who has done nothing wrong. Just because it's worked for him in the past, it's not going to work this time."
Who do you think is the leak? Arnold? Maria? Deep Throat?
Or me?


Does anyone seriously think that going on a TV show to find a spouse is a good thing, and that it actually works?
:::cricket::::

It's not working this time...either. It seems that Emily Maynard, who won the hand of Brad Womack, after knowing him for a few weeks while he dated twenty-five other girls, made out with about a dozen of those, probably schtupped a few, and the settled on her, has given him back the engagement ring.
It all began when Maynard was spotted running errands in Charlotte, N.C., without the rock that ABC bought for Brad Womack to present to her on 'The Bachelor' finale.
Oh, but she didn't give the ring back to Brad, she returned it to the network.
Aaaah, love. Or at least made-up-for-ratings TV love.
Sources--and by sources I mean every news agency that Maynard and Womack have on speed dial in their efforts to become famous for sixteen minutes--claim that the couple's long-distance relationship was just too hard to continue, and that Maynard ALLEGEDLY initiated the breakup after visiting Womack in Texas.
Hmmm, she lives in North Carolina and he lives in Texas. Yeah, that would have worked.
The lesson to learn? The Bachelor, and The Bachelorette, are sham shows and no one ever gets married and lives happily ever after. Except for that first girl.


Someone is a bitch.

And it's either Zach Galifianakis or January Jones.
It seems that during an interview, Jones called Galifianakis the funniest man she'd ever met, and he ALLEGEDLY called to thank her for the compliment.
But then the bitchitude started.

It seems that at some recent star-studded Hollywood event, like the People's Choice Awards, or the opening of a new Piggly Wiggly, Jones called Galifianakis over to her table, and then things went sour.

Let's have Zach tell the story: "I sit at her table and talk for 10 minutes, and she goes, 'I think it's time for you to leave now. So I say, 'January, you are an actress in a show and everybody's going to forget about you in a few years, so f-cking be nice,' and I got up and left."
Ooooh, suh-nap!
i don't know who this Galifianakis fella is, but he just might be my new hero.
Plus, he knows how to rock the red one-piece, and that's hard to do.

I guess it pays to be a wacktress of some infamy. At least if you're Lindsay Lohan.

It seems the jewel thief and prescription drug abuser was actually spared serving her four-month sentence at the Lynwood Jail this week, and was instead ordered confined to her own home for the next four months.
Really? Jewel thieves can stay at home as long as they wear the monitoring anklet?
"She is now confined to the interior premises of her home at all times," LA Sheriff's spokesman, Steve Whitmore.
Wow. The horror! Forced to stay in her Venice Beach home. I wanna be a drug addict, DUI'er, jewel thief and kidnapper, so I can get the Venice Beach jail.
And there are reports that Lohan could spend as little as two weeks on house arrest if she displays good behavior. Good behavior? In her own home? What does that mean? She has to clean up after she eats? She needs to share the rmeote? She has to be nice? Okay, that last one might be hard.
And, of course, she will still have to complete her 480 ordered hours of community service at a downtown LA women's shelter and the county morgue.
The morgue? Maybe she can look for her career while she's there.

Maria and Me, and Baby Makes........Divorce

Looks like the Gropenator really effed up this time, fathering a child with a member of the household staff. He told Maria about it, ten years after the fact, and after he left his job as Gropenator of California. Says the adulterer:

"After leaving the governor's office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago," Schwarzenegger said Monday night in a statement issued to The Times in response to questions. "I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry. I ask that the media respect my wife and children through this extremely difficult time," the statement concluded. "While I deserve your attention and criticism, my family does not. "