I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Oh there is nothing like messy drama—and I don’t mean the Johnny and Amber type of messy that goes on years after the divorce—but the mess that is Jason Sudeikis and Olivia Wilde.

The couple were together almost ten unmarried years and share two children, Otis and Daisy. They split in 2020 and the break-up messiness included Harry Styles, who began dating Olivia instantly, or perhaps slightly before. The break-up ALLEGEDLY hit Jason very hard as he was hoping that Olivia’s fling with Harry was just a phase, but Olivia and Harry are still together, so there’s been some drama.’

And the best part of the drama is that, while onstage at CinemaCon in Las Vegas to promote the movie she directed, Don’t Worry Darling, starring Harry Styles and Florence Pugh, Olivia was handed a manila envelope. Now, nothing good ever comes in a manila envelope, especially one labeled “personal and confidential” and she asked:

“This is for me?”

She opened it and discovered it was papers from Jason’s lawyer suing her for custody of their children. Ouch. Sudeikis, for his part says he had no idea the envelope would be delivered to his ex onstage. Uh huh.

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As we already know, Khloé Kardastrophe admitted that she Photoshopped a photo of her daughter, True, into a Disneyland trip that True actually didn’t make. And because Big Sister Kim hates being left out of the drama and needed a break from the Blac Chyna trial, Kim explained why the picture was Photoshopped and it’s pure Kardastrophe myth and vapidness.

Kim held a press conference over on Instagram to admit that on the day in question her child, Chicago, was sitting next to Kylie‘s daughter Stormi, and Kylie doesn't want her child exploited like that …. Hold for laughter because the Kardastrophes are built on exploiting their children … and so Kim did what she had to do:

“[That picture] wasn’t going to mess up my IG feed. Chi was wearing pink and it matched perfectly. You know how much a good aesthetic means to my soul and I will be damned if Kylie will ruin that for me and mess up my IG grid. So thank you True for taking one for the team!”

Seriously, she did it for her Instagram feed, rather than oh, I don’t know, not posting a picture at all. Seriously this family are fame vampires.

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Last week, we learned that there was trouble on the set of Aziz Ansari’s directorial debut film, Being Mortal, due to a complaint of “inappropriate behavior” but what does that even mean these days. Sexual harassment? Bullying? Name-calling? Dumb jokes?

Well, we now know the complaint was lodged against Bill Murray. There have been stories for years of Bill Murray’s temper—he threw an ashtray at Richard Dreyfus and got into a verbal altercation with Lucy Liu—and it seems Bill Murray was ALLEGEDLY “touchy” with the women on set, and those women complained and the film was shut down. A source says:

“He was very hands-on touchy, not in any personal areas, but put an arm around a woman, touched her hair, pulled her ponytail–but always in a comedic way. It is a fine line and everybody loves Bill, but while his conduct is not illegal, some women felt uncomfortable and he crossed a line.”

How many times do people have to be told to keep their hands to themselves? I mean, good on Bill for not throwing tchotchkes, or wrestling a co-star to the ground, but keep your hands off. Was Bill dozing the last few years or did he think #MeToo meant ‘I’ll have that also’?

Sheesh.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Solange Knowles, the 33-year-old sister of Beyoncé and her 56-year-old music video director, Alan Ferguson, have separated. It was confirmed on Instagram … cuz that’s how it’s done.

Who cares, right? Well, I kinda do because  she out-Goop’d Paltrow’s “conscious uncoupling” in the confirmation:

“the past 2 years have brought me more physical and spiritual transition and evolution than ever before my body left me with no choice but to listen and be still within that stillness i begin my journey in confronting my worst enemy, fear. ive lived my best and worst moments in front of the lens and gaze of the world since i was a teenager. ive always tried to live in my truth no matter how ugly or full of love it is. ive also tried to carve out the space to protect my heart, and my life as it unfolds, evolves, and changes. 11 years ago i met a phenomenal man who changed every existence of my life. early this year we separated and parted ways, (and tho it ain’t nan no body business) i find it necessary to protect the sacredness of my personal truth and to live in it fully just as I have before and will continue to do. it is unfair to not have power of your own story as you shape and mold and rewrite it yourself. a n–a ain’t perfect, but im leaning into the fear of the unknown and all the glory and power i know exist within god and the universes grace. may all of your transitions no matter how big or small, be kind to you and filled with incredible love and light!”

Wow, that was a word salad of epic proportions. She beats Goop in style, but Goop scored on literacy and punctuation.

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Poor Sarah Jessica Parker. First, her plans to make some big coins doing a third Sex and the City movie that no one asked for, were scuttled, and now someone has made off with her Halloween pumpkins.

SJP had driven all the way to the Berkshires for the right pumpkins and then displayed them on the stoop of her NYC home and someone stole them. And, so she did what all self-entitled people do, she took to social media to report the crime and, well, the wrong was righted when people began leaving pumpkins outside the Parker-Broderick home in an attempt to save Halloween for a One Percenter.

Seriously. She whines, and people bought pumpkins for her. I guess perhaps she really did need those SATC coins.

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Nicki Minaj loves a feud right up until someone throws a show, but, what did she expect folks to say when she decided to marry Kenneth Petty, a convicted sex offender? Enter loudmouth, unless it comes to her own drama, Wendy Williams, who decided she just can’t get beyond that whole sex offender business and is taking Nicki’s marriage to her snark corner. But did Williams go too far when she talked about Petty being a “killer” and a “sex offender“?

Perhaps; because Nicki took to her Queen Radio show to passive aggressively fire back about Wendy’s marital and substance abuse issues without even mentioning Williams by name:

“There are people who report the news and there are people who do it with an evil intent in their heart, viciousness. And I pray for you because I know you’re hurting and I know you must be sick and humiliated … I didn’t know that in our society, you have to be plagued by your past. I didn’t know that people can’t turn over a new leaf. I didn’t know that your viciousness and evilness was this deep rooted. When a woman isn’t really being loved at home, the viciousness is a different type. So I really wanted to pray for you today, because look at where you are now in your life. Look at what age you are. You’re sat up there being vicious all this time, and paid for that man’s mistress all these years. You paid for her shopping sprees, you paid for her hotels, you probably even paid for her GYN bills, you paid to have that baby delivered, hoe… If I were you, I would go and pray, ask for forgiveness. You can report the news–people do it all the time–without the level of viciousness and trying to play dumb and doing all this nonsense … How you doin’, stupid?”

Okay, passive aggressive until that last Wendy Williams™ line. And not a single shoe was thrown.

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Katharine McPhee recently penned a sweet tribute to husband David Foster, who celebrated his 70th birthday:

“I’ve known this man for 13 years now! What was once a working relationship became a friendship and ultimately led us here. Anyone who meets him talks about how charming he is, so much so that he eventually charmed his way into my heart.”

Well, he had the time because he is literally twice her age.

And he had the experience because McPhee is the fifth Missus Foster. Don’t hold your breath for everlasting love.

Just sayin’.

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Bill Murray recently went on Amy Schumer’s podcast and he talked about his dream job: working at P.F. Chang’s.

Oh, but he did, and it’s not just any P.F. Chang’s, it’s the one inside the Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport:

“I did fill out an application at P.F. Chang’s at the Atlanta airport, because I think it’s one of the best places. It looks like they are having the best time working at P.F. Chang’s.”

I can almost picture it, but then I picture the Bill Murray who ALLEGDLY threw an ashtray at his What About Bob co-star Richard Dreyfuss and wonder how Murray might react to the guest who complains about cold Won Ton Soup.

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I Ain't One To Gossip, But ....

I generally like my gossip fresh, but the only fresh gossip Richard Dreyfuss can hock up is about how … nearly twenty years ago … Bill Murray was a drunken, belligerent bully who once threw an ashtray at his face on the set of What About Bob?

Dreyfuss says:

“I didn’t talk about it for years. … Bill just got drunk at dinner. He was an Irish drunken bully, is what he was. … He came back from dinner [one night] and I said, ‘Read this [script tweak], I think it’s really funny.’ And he put his face next to me, nose-to-nose. And he screamed at the top of his lungs, ‘Everyone hates you! You are tolerated!’ There was no time to react, because he leaned back and he took a modern glass-blown ashtray. He threw it at my face from [only a couple feet away]. And it weighed about three quarters of a pound. And he missed me. He tried to hit me. I got up and left.”

Murray must also be a terrible shot if he was a couple of feet away and missed Dreyfuss’s melon completely with a large glass object. But still, it must be true, because one of Dreyfuss’s children, Ben, took to Twitter to confirm the story, claiming himself, his sister and his mom were all there:

“This story about Bill Murray is 100% true and I was on that set and so was [my mom and my sister]. And there’s actually worse shit that Bill Murray did during that movie to other people that my dad didn’t even mention because he probably felt it wasn’t his place.”

Until twenty years later.

Take a seat Dreyfuss family, this won’t make any of you relevant.

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Wendy Williams has had a hot mess of a life lately, between rumors of a husband cheating, only to be confirmed as fact when the husband’s sidepiece delivered his baby; and then there was Wendy falling off the wagon into some kind of substance abuse issue; and then there was the ex-con younger sidepiece Wendy picked up; and now this …

Wendy’s son, Kevin Hunter Jr., has just pleaded not guilty to assaulting his father, Kevin Hunter.

Kevin Jr. appeared in a New Jersey court for an arraignment stemming from his May 21 arrest for ALLEGEDLY fighting with his father outside of a Krauszer’s Food Store in West Orange; apparently the first flew after Junior called his Daddy a “bitch.”

Lovely family, no?

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Kim Kardastrophe has done it again. Something stupid, ignorant, self-serving and egotistical, I mean.

It seems Mrs. Yeezy created—well, she had someone create it for her and then she took the credit—a  new “solutionware” line of undergarments. Not so bad, but then ...she named the line Kimono.

Yes. She did. And now she’s trying to defend herself against accusations of cultural appropriation and outright disrespect by claiming she did it for the Kulture.

Yes. She did. And in a statement—written by someone else no doubt, because she’s a Kardastrophe—Mrs. Yeezy said:

“I made the decision to name my company Kimono, not to disassociate the word from its Japanese roots but as a nod to the beauty and detail that goes into a garment.”

Right. Then she added:

“My solutionwear brand is built with inclusivity and diversity at its core and I’m incredibly proud of what’s to come … which is why I can appropriate the word.”

Okay, that last line was me. And to be fair, Mrs. Yeezy isn’t trying to stop people from calling kimonos ‘kimonos,’ and she’s not going to send a cease and desist letters to Japan. She just wants to make her followers who have a collective IQ of 4, think Kimono is a play on Kim and that she’s so savvy and smart.

Yes. She did. But then a group called Tokyo Fashion got involved and said:

“Kim [Kardastrophe] filed for a bunch of trademarks on the word "kimono" (even for actual kimono), which, if granted, would allow her to ban Japanese companies from using the word "kimono" in America.”

Yes. She did. And then the Mayor of Kyoto, Daisaku Kadokawa, told Mrs. Yeezy to, well, eff off, in the kindest way:

“I am writing this letter to convey our thoughts on Kimono and ask you to re-consider your decision of using the name Kimono in your trademark. Kimono is a traditional ethnic dress fostered in our rich nature and history with our predecessors’ tireless endeavours and studies, and it is a culture that has been cherished and passed down with care in our living. Also, it is a fruit of craftsmanship and truly symbolizes sense of beauty, spirits and values of Japanese.”

He goes on, but apparently it was enough to send Mrs. Yeezy back to the branding board because she’s changing the name.

I might suggest … ‘Kim? Oh. No.’ Might I suggest that the “solution” is for you to go away?

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And now, in crazy … Rihanna posted a photo of herself on Instagram wearing H2T [that’s Tyra Banks speak—hence the crazy—for ‘head-to-toe’] Fenty schmata—which is Rihanna’s clothing line.

Now, Tyra didn’t comment on the clothes, or RiRi’s style or fashion sense or business acumen. Nope, Tyra commented that she thought it was a picture of her because she thinks she and RiRi could be twins.

Crazy. On her best day … never.

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More crazy? Okurrrrrrrrrrr.

And I can say that now, out loud and proud because Cardi B had filed for a trademark on ‘Okurrrrr’—she says it’s her catchphrase—and her application was dee-nied by U.S. Patent and Trademark officials who explained that Cardi’s ALLEGED slogan falls under the category of “widely-used commonplace expressions,” and did not fit the bill to deserve a trademark.

Who knew Nicki Minaj worked for the Patent office?

Okurrrrrrrr?

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Years ago Grace Jones played May Day in A View To A Kill and so executives on the newest Bond film, AKA Bond 25, thought it’s be cool to have her back again.

But, sadly, or not, the only was you’re gonna see Jones in Bond again is to watch A View To A Kill again, because she is not coming back after all. Well, she was back, and filming, but then she allegedly walked off set because she thought her role was too small.

Um, honey? Love you. Love everything about you. Thinking of being you for Halloween, but … Bond films are about Bond. It’s not called Grace Jones.

Okurrrrrrrrr?

Thanks to the Patent office for letting me say that without having to slip any coins to Cardi B.

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It's Snarkurday!

Kanye took to Twitter again for yet another long-winded rant that devolved into a money beg.

It all began when Kanye announced he was $53 million in debt … bad fashion and crazy costs, y’all … and then bragged he would win 100 Grammys before he died, and then he began begging, begging, Mark Zuckerberg for some of his Facebook coins via Twitter:

Mark Zuckerberg invest 1 billion dollars into Kanye West ideas

Mark Zuckerberg I know it’s your bday but can you please call me by 2mrw…

You love hip hop, you love my art… I am your favorite artist but you watch me barely breathe and still play my album in your house …

World, please tweet, FaceTime, Facebook, instagram, whatever you gotta do to get Mark to support me…

I’m this generation’s Disney… I want to bring dope sh-t to the world…

I don’t have enough resources to create what I really can…

Mark, I am publicly asking you for help…one of the coolest things you could ever do is to help me in my time of need and I will always respect you for that and the world will love you…

Yes, he Tweeted that. He truly thinks Mark Zuckerberg will stop spending money on those pesky hungry kids in Africa and give it to a windbag who lost his money on a ridiculously laughable fashion line?

Now, that’s funny.

And it looks like someone else in Kanye’s life needs coins … Caitlyn Jenner … who has filed a cross-complaint against Jessica Steindorff, who was driving the Prius in front of her and, well, let’s revisit the details of the crash:

Caitlyn wad riving on PCH when her SUV hit a Lexus in front of her causing that car to shoot into the next lane where it was hit by an oncoming Hummer and Kim Howe, the driver of the Lexus, was killed. With the Lexus out of the way, Caitlyn’s SUV hit the Prius that was in front of the Lexus. Caitlyn was sued by Kim Howe’s stepchildren, the family in the Hummer and Jessica Steindorff. The family in the Hummer is also suing Kim Howe’s estate.

Caitlyn settled with Kim Howe’s family and the Hummer people, but is now suing Jessica Steindorff because she thinks that Jessica is partly responsible for her rear-ending the Lexus and sending it into another lane to be hit by oncoming traffic.

Seriously, Caitlyn? You need to transition to logic, girl, because you are at fault.

Do not take flash photography of Bill Murray! Dammit!

After a day of golf, Murray took to the rooftop lounge of the country club to relax. And apparently some fans wanted to take his photo; since it was night time, the flash feature was on and Bill snapped. He got up, walked to their table, grabbed their phones — more than one — and pitched them off the roof. Then he ran off.

The phone folks called the police who, eventually, tracked Murray down, and he’s agreed to pay for the damaged phones if the owners opted not to press charges. Meanwhile, the owner of the restaurant has banned people from taking pictures because he doesn’t want to deal with another Bill Murray moment.

Like I said, Do not take flash pictures of Bill Murray! Consider yourself warned.

Well, after a brief respite, the High School Fight between Mean Girls Taylor Swift and … you thought I was gonna say Katy Perry but I’m not … Kanye West has heated up again.

At his recent show in New York, Kanye played a song called “Famous” from his new album in which he says:

“I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex. Why? I made that bitch famous.”

Cue Taylor writing a pity party song of her own, though, first, it was her little brother, Austin, who smacked back at Kanye by posting an Instagram video of him throwing away His Ugly Kanye West designed shoes! Oh snap!

But Taylor waited until she hit the Grammy stage to strike back at Kanye. After her team purchased the Album of the Year award for her, Tay-Tay said, from the stage:

“As the first woman to win Album of the Year at the Grammys twice, I want to say to all the young women out there, [that] there are going to be people along the way that will try to undercut your success or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame, but if you just focus on the work and you don’t let those people sidetrack you, someday when you get where you’re going you will look around and you will know that it was you and the people who love you who put you there and that will be the greatest feeling in the world.”

It was then that Beyoncé rushed the stage, snatched the award from Taylor’s hands and declared that Kanye is the greatest artist of all time. Okay, maybe that last part didn’t happen, but it could have …

More Kanye? Of course …

Last weekend he was the musical guest on SNL and it almost didn’t happen because Kanye threw an epic hissy fit worthy of his own infant daughter and threatened to storm off!

Apparently, it took SNL head honcho Lorne Michaels to soothe the savage beast’s ego, after even his wife, Kim Kardastrophe, couldn’t sweet-talk him down. And it was all due to the stage set that SNL was using; Kanye didn’t like it because, well, maybe it wasn’t crafted of solid gold or something …

Luckily, after a cold compress was applied to Kanye’s ego, he did stay and perform, although he scowled more than usual while doing so.

Rihanna was supposed to be at the Grammys last weekend to debut a song off of her new album, ANTI but backed out just minutes before because …. bronchitis.

Odd, because Rihanna was everywhere the week leading up to the Grammys; at every party, every function, every photo op. She even performed the night before the Grammys at the MusiCares Person of the Year event and sang flawlessly.

TMZ isn’t buying bronchitis, and says Rihanna was screaming and hysterical before bailing on the show, though there are conflicting stories about what triggered her outburst. Some say she was not happy with the rehearsal and was shrieking mad about it; her people say it was all medical; and some say she watched Kendrick Lamar’s rehearsal and was so intimidated that she just scrammed.

I’m kinda buying that last one … if Rihanna can’t steal the show, she won’t do the show.

What was the most exclusive party after the Grammy’s?  The one that denied entry to Sir Paul McCartney, apparently. And it was hosted by that bastion of musicality, that legend in his own mind, Tyga!

Yup, at Tyga’s after-party Macca got in; Woody Harrelson got in; Beck, too. Taylor Hawkins, the drummer from the Foo Fighters, went inside. But Paul McCartney was kicked to the curb because the door man did not recognize him. Folks standing outside tried to tell the bouncer who he was denying, but the man just shrugged and said, Sorry old-timer.

That Woman must be rolling over in her crypt because you know she had cameras there and would have whored herself out to McCartney for a selfie.

50 Cent still has financial problems; he was ordered to pay $5 million to Lastonia Leviston after posting a sex tape of Leviston and another man online; he was also ordered to pay $17.2 million to a former business partner for stealing the design to his “Sleek by 50” headphones. So 50 filed for bankruptcy, possibly hoping to avoid paying off these massive judgments, but it looks like the courts are gonna start garnishing his paychecks to satisfy the debts and his lawyers are claiming, yes, “slavery.”

50 Cent and his attorneys are telling the judge he is trying to set the clock more than 150 years and gunning to make him their slave, claiming the plan violates the 13th Amendment to the Constitution which bans slavery and involuntary servitude.

Yes, because in 50 Cents world if you owe people money and don’t pay and they come after you, you’re a slave to them. Howsabout just not being a dick and getting sued and just paying your bills, Fiddy?

Oh, and Rihanna wasn’t the only one who skipped the Grammys at the last minute; Lauryn Hill did too.  But Lauryn is trying to say that she never said she’d appear on the show at all. And yet, according to academy president Neil Portnow, Lauryn was set to perform with The Weeknd, but when he took the stage, Lauryn was nowhere to be found.

Her duet was supposed to be a surprise, but the surprise was that she wasn’t there … even though she’d rehearsed it the day before.

Lauryn’s rep says the Grammys were wrong in announcing she was going to perform because she never said she would … though she’d show up for a rehearsal and for camera blocking.

Lay off’a the weed, Lauryn, you’re all confuzzled.

I know love, young love, new love; and I also know stupidity and destroying a national landmark. Someone maybe should’a told Vanessa Hudgens.

She recently spent a weekend with beau Austin Butler in Sedona, Arizona, and, as young stupid lovers are apt to do, they wanted to create a reminder of this romantic time.

So they carved their names into one of the federally protected red rock formations and then Vanessa Instagrammed it!

Like I said, stupid …

I Ain't One To Gossip, But.............

Say, hasn't this been done? And done?

Apparently filmmakers have officially run out of ideas. At least at Universal Pictures where they are developing a remake of the 1982 movie The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas starring Dolly Parton and Burt Reynolds.

And that film was based on the Broadway play of the same name by Larry L. King.

In case you've been living in a closet, it's the story is about a town sheriff and local madam who go after a TV personality trying to shut down a local whorehouse, The Chicken Ranch. Dolly's famous song, "I Will Always Love You" was featured in the original film version, but not the play.

Universal doesn't know if they will' include it in this rehash, I mean, reboot.

Dim bulb, and View co-host, Sherri Shepherd doesn't know when to shut up.

When she first arrived on the show, in 1928, I think, she told the story of her husband, their marriage, his affair, the love child, and their divorce, but now, some eighty years later, she is still talking smack about the ex; and he ain't havin' it.

Mr. Sherri Shepherd, Jeff Tarpley has sent an open letter to his ex-wife, meaning it didn't go directly to Sherri, it went to the media, begging her to stop hating on him for the sake of their young son: “I've owned up to the mistakes I've made and I never claimed to be perfect. All I ask is that that she no longer dwell on the past; and instead, let's move on with our lives while providing our son the best possible care."

Yeah, Jeff, that won't happen.

Shepherd's been making jokes about her ex since for ever, and she even turned it into a TV show; no, not The View, but her own sitcom on Lifetime.

Word to Sherri: Build a bridge and get over it.

Please for the love of all things holy say it isn't so!

Apparently, the Gosselin's are trying to stage a comeback.

Jon and Kate are so desperate for fame and the dollars it brings that they are actually speaking to one another about letting TLC exploit their brood for a few more years.

But, relax, the kid's will be fine; it's their do-anything-for-fame-whoring parents I'm truly worried about.

Not!

Speaking of remakes and reboots and rehashes and giant-assed mistakes, word is out that Tom Cruise, whose career is in the crapper--seriously, name the last successful film he was in--will be headed back for another Mission: Impossible sequel, aka More Of The Same.

Poor Tom, his baby-mama-baby-wife need new shoes, so he has to keep working and pounding out the crap.

On the American Idol front, Guy Oseary, aka Madonna's main manager--because it takes a village to keep Madge happy--and one of the producers of the Twilight franchise, may be taking Simon Cowell's place at the judges table.

He may have an in, given his music industry background, and after years of working for Madonna, you know he can handle diva throw-downs and smack-fests, and come out smelling like the biggest bitch of them all.

Of course, there is also talk of replacing Cowell with that icon of the music industry, Howard Stern, or, if they really want to scrape the crap off the bottom of Hollywood's shoe, that fat-assed-gas-bag Perez Hilton wants the job.

Seriously, Perrez Hilton!

More reboots. Must be the season of nothing new.

Garry Marshall, at the premiere of his new film, Valentine's Day, announced that maybe, perhaps, it just might happen, that they'll do a feature-film version of Laverne and Shirley starring, and this is hysterical, Jennifer Garner and Jessica Biel.

Yeah, when I think wacky, physical comedy, my go-to gals are Garner and Biel.

Garry says: "We're gonna work on that. My sister Penny and Cindy are gonna have a guest cameo. They're gonna walk 'schlemiel, schlemazel'."

Not.Gonna.Work.

That's all I'm sayin'.

And then comes word, and say, where do all these words come from, really, but I digress, word comes that there will finally be a Ghostbusters 3! I've been waiting for this since, like, never! But sources, and again, who are these sources, say that Bill Murray will be back, but that he wants to be killed off in the first part of the film. Now, that's comedy! Murray said; "I'll come back in Ghostbusters 3 only if I get to be a ghost. I said to them, 'I'll do it if you kill me off in the first reel.' So, now they are going to have me as a ghost in the film. The first 45 minutes of the original Ghostbusters is some of the funniest stuff ever made. The second one was disappointing, because the special-effects guys took over. I had something like two scenes– and they're the only funny ones in the movie." The only funny scenes in the movie? He must have seen a different GB 2, because the one I saw had no funny scenes in it at all.

Lindsey Lohan is still partying.

Oprah Winfrey still has a big ass, er, head.

That's all.