Showing posts with label Kenny Chesney. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kenny Chesney. Show all posts

Friday, August 13, 2010

I Didn't Say It........

Barney Frank, on the news that a young lesbian was punched in the stomach by a NOM supporter at their Indianapolis rally:
“People have a constitutional right to express themselves as they wish, and that right obviously applies even to people who for some reason have dedicated much of their lives to trying to diminish the lives of others. I do not understand what it is that drives people to spend so much time trying to take away the rights of those of us who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender, but they should understand that the freedom to do so in no way insulates them from those who disagree with their agenda from making their presence clear. For someone engaging in that right of peaceful counter-demonstration to be assaulted by a NOM attendee is wholly unacceptable and the leaders of this organization should be taking steps not simply to prevent any such behavior in the future, but to exclude from their ranks anyone who was engaged in it in the past.”

It's funny how NOM continually plays the victim card, and yet they are touring the country, spreading hate.
We should all be such victims.

Julia Roberts. on the botox/plastic surgery trend in Hollywood:
“It’s unfortunate that we live in such a panicked, dysmorphic society where women don’t even give themselves a chance to see what they’ll look like as older persons. I want to have some idea of what I’ll look like before I start cleaning the slates. I want my kids to know when I’m pissed, when I’m happy, and when I’m confounded. Your face tells a story… and it shouldn’t be a story about your drive to the doctor’s office.”

Nothing wrong with a little 'bo', unless you end up looking like a cross between Joan Rivers and Sylvester Stallone.
No one needs to see that.

Slumdog Millionaire star Dev Patel, on being pissed at Hollywood because he is not getting offered substantial roles:
"Because Slumdog was such a big hit there was a lot of pressure in terms of what I did next. For my second film I wanted a role that would stretch me, but all I was getting offered were stereotypical parts like the goofy Indian sidekick...[Or] I'm likely to be offered the roles of a terrorist, cab driver and smart geek… I want to show that I have versatility....I'm buzzing with adrenaline and raring to go, but I have to be realistic. Being an Asian actor, it's never going to be easy. Hopefully the industry is changing and the casting directors will be less focused on colour so that people like myself can get through the door."

Why cast him as the "Asian"? Why not just cast him as "that guy"?
I think if Hollywood looked beyond skin color and accent and ethnicity, it might translate to the rest of us.

Kenny Chesney, AGAIN on his five-month marriage to his beard Renee Zellweger:
“There ain’t nothing you can do about it. Just hang on for the ride. Now I look back on it as just another way of getting knocked down on the football field.”

Oh, Miss Chesney.
You pose and you ponder and yet you can't get beyond a marriage of convenience from FIVE YEARS AGO.
Look around, gurl, Renee has already moved on to another ALLEGED closeted mo.
Build a bridge, Kenny, build a bridge and get over it.

Verne E. Rupright, the mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, on Levi Johnston's mayoral bid:
"Well, it is a little early to declare. Usually most wait until the year the seat is up. But since I am nearly old enough to be Levi's grandfather I think it would be wise for him to get a high school diploma and keep his clothes on. The voters like that!"

I think Verne ought to give up his office and take his act on the road.
He's funny.
High school diploma! Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Florida Attorney General Bill McCollum, on his desire to see his state's ban on gay adoption extended to gay foster parenting:
"I really do not think that we should have homosexuals guiding our children. I think that it’s a lifestyle that I don’t agree with. I realize a lot of people do. It’s my personal faith, religious faith, that I don’t believe that the people who do this should be raising our children. It’s not a natural thing. You need a mother and a father. You need a man and a woman. That’s what God intended."

Of course, within hours of having this quote hit the airwaves, homophobe fucktard asshat wingnut loser McCollum said he didn't "remember" saying such a thing.
Uh huh.

Emma Thompson, who is writing the screenplay for the remake of My Fair Lady, on Audrey Hepburn:
"I was thrilled to be asked to do it because, having a look at it, I thought that there needs to be a new version. I'm not hugely fond of the film. I find Audrey Hepburn fantastically twee. Twee is whimsy without wit. It's mimsy-mumsy sweetness without any kind of bite. And that's not for me. She can't sing and she can't really act, I'm afraid. I'm sure she was a delightful woman - and perhaps if I had known her I would have enjoyed her acting more, but I don't and I didn't, so that's all there is to it, really."

Oh, Emma, I do so like you, but, honey, ripping on Audrey Hepburn?
She knew she couldn't sing, but the studio wanted her for the job.
And she can, could, act.
Maybe since you didn't know her, you should just keep quiet.
M'kay?

Cardinal Norberto Rivera, on the Mexican Supreme Court's ruling that Mexico City's marriage equality law is constitutional:
"The Roman Catholic archbishop said it was wrong to go against Christian doctrine that recognizes only marriages between a man and a woman. 'The church cannot fail to call evil evil,' Rivera said in a statement...The Federal District is the only part of Mexico that allows gay marriages. The city government said last week that since 320 same-sex couples had married since March, 173 of them male and 147 female. Rivera said homosexuals have suffered abuses from the broader society, but argued that allowing same-sex marriages is not the way to try to atone for such injustices. He called same-sex unions 'inherently immoral,' saying they 'distort the nature of marriage raised by Christ to the dignity of a sacrament.'"

More bullshiz about religion and marriage and laws.
When will they ever learn?

Julia Roberts, on love and equality:
"Even in America, we think that we're such forerunners and, you know, we haven't worked out all the kinks either. So I think that...love is the ultimate theme of our lives, and to let everybody love in the best way they can, in the most nurturing way, with whoever that person is that they choose, or chooses them. I mean, if we could get that down it would solve a lot of other problems."

You're preachin' to the choir, Mizz Roberts.
Let's make equality the law of the land so we can focus on real issues.

Kathy Griffin, on the Levi Johnston pretend engagement to Bristol Palin:
"Well of course I take full responsibility. Here's the thing: Once you have a fly girl like me, you're desperate and you'll do anything to get over me. The lengths that my poor Levi had to go to try to get over me are quite staggering. Bristol and I may have to have some sort of Waiting to Exhale moment, where we're both Angela Bassett. Or, frankly I'd prefer that she was Angela Bassett and I of course got to be Whitney Houston. Maybe we can set his clothing on fire in Wasilla. We are now forever connected. I guess if Levi comes back to me I will take him back, because who knows, I could still be, through Sarah Palin — also an endless source of material for me — one click away from living in the White House. So get ready, Barney Frank and Scott Brown. I just might be in the Oval Office if I play my cards right!"

I'm sure he'll come back to you Kathy.
He's about due for another fifteen minutes.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

I Ain't One To Gossip, But.....


Crack is wack, and it looks like it might be back.
Fans in England are storming the box office demanding refunds for the latest string of Whitney Houston off-key, scratchy, disjointed concerts there.
Houston, suffering from exhaustion or laryngitis or allergies or mallady-of-the-day, had reviewers reaching for the Thesaurus to describe the horrendous performance she gave in Birmingham:
"Houston, we have a problem."
Houston was "panting more than John Prescott running for the bus," a reference to a well-known, rotund, politician from Wales.
Her Birmingham concerts were first canceled because of respiratory issues--the crack pipe wouldn't light? And then when she finally rescheduled, there were constant water breaks and long chats with the audience so Whitney could catch her breath.
Take a listen to it today:

All in all awful. And sad.
It used to be the voice.


Someone is looking for a part in the sequel.
Avatar star Sigourney Weaver believes James Cameron didn't win the Oscar for Best Director because, wait for it, it's rich, he isn't female. She thinks the Academy wanted to make history by giving Kathryn Bigelow, the first woman to win an Oscar for Best Director, the grand prize. Of course, Siggie Weaver puts it in her own words:
"Jim didn't have breasts, and I think that was the reason. He should have taken home that Oscar. In the past, Avatar would have won because they [the Oscar voters] loved to hand out awards to big productions, like 'Ben-Hur.' Today it's fashionable to give the Oscar to a small movie that nobody saw."
Or maybe to a small film that's just plain, um, I dunno, better?
Siggie? I'm certain you'll be in the sequel so there's really no need to French kiss Cameron's ass.


What do you do when your career is officially over?
Well if you're Steven Seagal, you allegedly drug young girls and turn them into your own personal sex slaves. At least that's the story one young lady is telling.
Kayden Nguyen has filed a $1 million lawsuit against Steven for sexual harassment, claiming she was hired as Seagal's executive assistant last year, to perform mundane secretarial tasks for the has-been actor, but, allegedly, Seagal had other, um, tasks in mind.
According to court documents, Kayden discovered Seagal "had been keeping two young female Russian 'Attendants' on staff who were available for his sexual needs 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." When one attendant quit, Kayden was hired to fill the void; or for Seagal to fill her, um, void.
Yeah. I went there. Sue me.
On her first day on the job, Seagal allegedly began by "pushing his hands under her shirt and attempting to fondle her bare breast.” Kayden claims the next morning he then allegedly “forcibly held her legs apart” and “forced his hand down her pants…” The suit then alleges--sheesh so many italics--that a third assault took place several hours later when “Seagal forcibly lifted Ms. Nguyen’s blouse, forced his head on her bare chest and attempted to suck her breasts and nipples. He stopped only when she ran.”
After just three days of, ahem, work, Nguyen left his employ.
A sex slave for Steve Seagal. So many things wrong there.


Tiki Barber is built like a brick s**thouse. A hot brick s**ithouse. But apparently--I've grown weary of allegedly--he's drinking from the same cup as one Tiger Woods or one Jesse James.
See, Tiki and the missus have split up. But the day after he announced that he was leaving his wife, his college sweetheart, who is eight month's pregnant with twins, stories popped up that Tiki's torch was being lit by another, one Traci Lynn Johnson.
Traci Lynn, a former NBC intern--and Tiki works at NBC now--was his assistant at the network when he blogged at the Olympics, and she also travels with him. She had the seat next to him when he hosted a Travel Channel documentary screening, and even posted a picture of herself on her MySpace--Seriously? There are still people on MySpace?--page in a Giants jersey with Barber's number on it.
Still, no one is copping to an affair, and Barber's announcement that he was leaving the mother of his two--soon to be four--children is the typical blabblahblah:
"After 11 years of marriage, Ginny and I have decided to separate. This decision was a painful one, but we are moving forward amicably and will continue to work together to raise our children with the love and dedication they have always known."
Still, if it is true that he's a cheater, Barber, who always seemed like a nice guy, a nice hot guy, also looks like a hypocrite who said this about his father cheating on his mother:
"I don't give a %$#&* that the relationship didn't work. Not only did he abandon her, I felt like he abandoned us for a lot of our lives. I have a hard time forgiving that."
Pot.Kettle.Alleged Cheater.


Oh Oprah.
Kitty Kelley has written one of her "unauthorized" autobiographies on the Big O, and, while some say O has been an O-pen book about her life, there are some secrets she doesn't want y'all to know.
Like, she wasn't as poor as she made herself out to be.
One of O's cousins, Katherine Carr Esters told Kitty Kelley:
“Where Oprah got that nonsense about growing up in filth and roaches I have no idea. I’ve confronted her and asked, ‘why do you tell such lies?’ Oprah told me ‘that’s what people want to hear. The truth is boring.’”
And Kelley also writes about the rumors that swirled--I apparently missed these--about a, um, well, er, relationship between O and Diane Sawyer. Yes! Apparently, employees at ABC told Kelley that O and Diane had "giggly late-night phone calls" and that O gave Diane fabulous gifts like ginormous bouquets of orchids and a one-carat diamond ring. A toe-ring!
And still other sources told Kelley that O once paid an ex-boyfriend $50,000 to keep quiet about her gay brother and her own lesbian affairs. Hello Gayle! Mister Oprah Winfrey. The book even claims that O and her friend, Stedman Graham, do not share a bedroom.
Joo-say.
And there is still another big secret that Kelley is half-sharing: O doesn't know who her real father is; cousin Katherine Carr Esters told Kelley who he is, but made her promise not to publish the information until O's mother tells O the truth.
And then we have Vernon Winfrey, the man who raised the Big O, who has some, well, not so nice things to say about O's husband Gayle King. he calls her a "dirt hog" and "street heifer," and blames King for ruining his relationship with O: "[Oprah] may be admired by the world, but I know the truth. So does god and so does Oprah. Two of us remain ashamed."
Ouch!


This is just plain awful. Awful, and yet somehow, good!
The once almost-Missus Ben Affleck and the current-Missus Ben Affleck might be doing a movie together. Yikes! What kind of mother-effing idea is this?
JLo and JGa--the Jennifer's Lopez and Garner--are supposedly in talks to play, and this is funny, bitter love rivals in a new movie!
Some say coinkydink; some say it'll never happen. But, man, the chats that could go on between scenes with the Two Jennifers:
I think he loved me more.
But he married me.
Do you think he'll ever get over losing Matt Damon?

Could be fun..........if only.


Miss Kenny Chesney was on O and because there really isn't much to ask him when you get past the short and bald questions, O backtracked to the few minutes he spent "married" to Renée Zellweger.
Miss Kenny said: "I panicked…I look at my life as a box. … So everything that I put in — learn how to play guitar, put that in the box. The friends I made. I put that in the box, and my career grew. Everything around me—all of the awards and all of the songs I wrote and all the success and everything — I put in that box. That box built grew into this wonderful house. Okay? And you protect everything and all the relationships and all the people that helped you build that house. And this is the first time I've actually talked about it, but that's what happened. I protected that box. I felt that the idea of marriage made me lose my identity… I just don't know that I've found anybody bigger than that. It was out of the box. Oh my God, but it's tough. It really is tough. And she's a sweet soul, no doubt about it, but I just wasn't ready."
Yeah, that clears it all up Kenny.
Maybe it's just that allegedly you don't like puttin' your d**k in a box.
Just sayin'.


There are good parents and bad parents and stupid parents and WTF parents.
Ladies and Gentleladies, Mister and Mister Tom and Katie Cruise.
Their little offspring Suri is just about four, and yet she still drinks from a bottle. a baby bottle. Is it a Scientology thing?
Most kids give up the bottle around nine months and then pick it up again around eighteen when they realize their father and mother have a sham marriage, only the second bottle says Ketel One on it. And you keep it in a brown paper bag.
Tom? Katie? Don't you have handlers that can get your daughter off the bottle already?


And Mel Gibson.
Devout Catholic. So devout, he actually thinks the Roman Catholic church is too lenient so he built his own hardline Catholic church in Malibu. So devout he left his wife of twenty-seven years because he got his girlfriend pregnant. So devout he has now called it quits with baby mama Oksana Grigorieva.
The reason: they drifted apart.
Well, I guess when you're a devout-Catholic-holier-than-thou-rolling-drunk-driving-misogynist-anti-Semite, you do find yourself drifting apart from loved ones.
Pathetic asshat.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Miss Kenny Chesney


Bald On................................................Bald Off.

Kenny Chesney, some country singer, I guess, who was married to Renee Zellwiger for about a minute, tells Playboy that he's definitely not gay and has well over 100 women who could attest to that.

One hundred woman.
Does that make you 'not gay?'
Or does it make you a sex-obsessed little pricked dickhead?

Kenny says, and I quote: "Man, I was over 100 several years ago. There were years when I had a better summer than A-Rod, buddy. You know? I got on the boards quite often."

I think I threw up a little in my mouth.

I get so sick of these so-called 'straight' boys bitching and moaning because someone said they were gay.

Boo-hoo.

There are worse things that I could call you Miss Chesney.

Howsabout bald-headed-limp-dicked-guitar-playing-sleep-with-anything-douchebag-who-uses-his-celebrity-to-screw-women-and-then-brag-about-it-like-it's-a-good-thing?

Yeah, calling you gay is sooooo awful.

Piss off pissant.