TOPS AND BOTTOMS
Literally ... I'm guessing
The Top Five …and all men! I don’t remember the last time we were having an all-one-gender finale. I like it. Alyssa Milano meets the men on the runway and asks them to put their PR experience into words and naturally Anthony sums it up nicely:
“Project Runway is where you find out who you are as a designer, and Project Runway All Stars is where you show who you are as a designer.”
Word. And as soon as that lovely moment passes, Alyssa mentions their special guest this week and the men tremble …as Fabio puts it, he could feel the footsteps of Nina Garcia coming closer and closer.
Nina is tough; Nina can be mean; but Nina just wants the best. Be like Nina. I love me some Nina Garcia!
Oddly enough, though, Nina talks gaming and how it influences music and film, TV and, of course, fashion. Then Alyssa tells the designtestants that they’ll be teaming up with Candy Crush … apparently, it’s a game you play on your phone or something … and brings out Yonna Ingolf, a green-haired Goth designer for Candy Crush, to talk about the game.
Nina then gives them the challenge: resort looks inspired by a land within the Candy Crush world. They’ll have one day and $200 to make it work, and then Yonna tells them that the winning designer will collaborate with Candy Crush for a fashion design to be featured in the game or sold online or, oh, I don’t know, it’s a video game or something and I just can’t with it.
The designers head to the workroom to play a game of Candy Crush and whomever scores the most points gets first choice of ‘land’ to inspire their resort-wear. It’s all too much for me, games and fashion and candy, so let’s get on with it …
Ken is apparently a master at Candy Crush and beats all the designtestants by 50,000—Fabio—and almost 100,000 points—Poor Edmond, the newbie to the game.
As the winner, Ken gets first choice and picks something called Brûlée Bay, beach resort wear. He explains that his girl will be hosting a party at the Hamptons. He opts for a bold yellow fabric to create a cigarette pant jumpsuit worn under a sarong type flowy top.
Anne Fulenwider is back, reminding the designers that she knows what Nina likes and dislikes. For her part, Anne loves ken’s color choice and his tailoring.
WHAT HE SAID
I don’t do movement at all, but I’m trying to push myself… there’s wind, life and breath.
WHAT I SAID
I hate yellow. I love this.
WHAT THE JUDGES SAID
The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ likes this, and loves the tailored trousers and the riff on a sarong; she called it restrained and effortless.
Nina Garcia says Ken’s look is “juicy” saying the color was everything; she says Ken he nailed it, though the fabric did seem a bit heavy for the beach.
Isaac Mizrahi loves the color and that it was both beach and tailored, but questioned the fabric choice, saying it moved the look away from the beach.
Guest Judge Kelly Osbourne wants the look, but wished the sarong was removable for a ‘Wow’ moment.
Alyssa Milano called it ‘chic beach’ but didn’t think it was anything new.
He sucked at the game and came in dead last … just one more thing he and I have in common other than the fact that we love his guns. As last, Edmond picked got stuck with Marshmallow Mountain Resort and instantly went into ski-wear.
A skin-tight sexy ski outfit.
He wants black with a pop of color but seems to skip color and go basic black. Anne questions both his fabric choice, and his literal; take on mountain resort as ski athletic wear, but he will not budge; she mentions après ski and he doesn’t seem to know what that means.
Big mistake; huge.
WHAT HE SAID
I think that easily this look can interchange into something else … on the ski slopes … at night with a heel.
WHAT I SAID
It really should have been tighter because all I’m getting is fur-collared body bag.
WHAT THE JUDGES SAID
The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ says après ski would have been a better choice because this is athletic wear, not resort wear.
Isaac Mizrahi liked that it wasn’t so tight, but he wasn’t so mad about the fur collar as an afterthought. He also reminds us that you can already by a ski suit anywhere.
Nina Garcia thinks Edmond was tripped up by not having a choice in which ‘land’ he got. She says he didn’t make the best of it, he made the safe of it. This was Edmond not trying.
Kelly Osbourne called it: wetsuit. And she wishes it had been in a brighter color.
Alyssa Milano was thrown by it not being so tight and says the crotch looked a little penis. She does say she likes it, and Kelly asks if she likes it because she likes Edmond and Isaac says, “Yes!”
I, too, like Edmond …a lot … but this isn’t a good look.,.
Stanley gets third place in the Candy crush Contest and he opts for Lemonade Lake Resort. And, as happens with Stanley, he’s planning on making several pieces yet again, with a dress worn over pants, something, he says, he’s never seen on the PR before. Now, I could search this blog or Google and find out he’s wrong, but just my word for it. Someone has done pants udder a dress before …
But no one admits it; even Anne seemed wide-eyed at the mere thought, and suggests he do something a bit more easy and elegant; he suggests a huge scarf and Anne’s head explodes.
Stanley soldiers on, and as Fabio sees his design he says, jokingly, “F**k off, Stanley,” Then Ken pipes up, “Damn, Stanley.” And that’s apparently all Stanley needed to follow his vision.
WHAT HE SAID
The movement of the skirt and sleeves are pure perfection.
WHAT I SAID
It is a lot of look…and it’s giving me Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford in ‘Mommie Dearest.’
WHAT THE JUDGES SAID
The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ says he did a great job with a heavy fabric, but she has a problem with the trousers’ proportions.
Isaac Mizrahi says there’s something fresh about the look, as part of a collections, but he wishes the print was gone, replaced by a solid color.
Kelly Osbourne claims it’s new and fresh, but then says she wishes the dress was just a blouse, like a blouse and trousers would be “new and fresh”?
Nina Garcia loves the bold volume but says bold volume in sleeves and skirt hem and pants and hair is a bit much.
Alyssa Milano this is her favorite Stanley design from the entire season.
Fabio falls about 50,000 points from the Candy Crush win, so he picks second …and goes for Taffy Tropics Resort look, with a dress, albeit and utterly backless dress, over pants. He was headed toward a color blocked look but switched it up to keep one color on one side and the other color opposite.
He called it something a Brazilian girl would wear on New Year’s Eve to the beach … because it’s Summer in December in Brazil.
Anne thinks it’s too heavy and too hot and hates the pants, but without them it would be a bare-assed mess.
WHAT HE SAID
I’m a little torn. All I notice [are] the flaws.
WHAT I SAID
It looks nice from the front, but the bare back just seems off to me.
WHAT THE JUDGES SAID
Alyssa says she loves a onesie and loves the back of his design.
The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ liked his color story, and that it looked like Fabio; she was a bit shocked at all the pants under dresses moments on the runway. She has nothing to critique, really, though she wishes he’d design clothes like those he wears; both Nina and Isaac say Fabio should do a menswear collection based on his personal style.
Isaac, naturally, says he has some criticisms; the dress seems heavy, like she may topple forward at any moment, and he says the model looks like a prisoner of the garment.
Nina Garcia loved the exuberance of the look but agreed with Isaac about the heavy front.
Kelly Osbourne also loves it but thinks it’s a bit of a heavy fabric.
Anthony is also a Candy Crush Virgin, but he bests Edmond by a hair and gets to skip Marshmallow Mountain and choose Sticky Savannah, a safari resort. Safari is not a word Anthony can say, though he says it’s because “Safari is a stripper’s name in his neighborhood.”
At Mood, he skips all colors and goes for a white eyelet fabric that reminds him of the circles and squares in the game, and yet is breathable on
WHAT HE SAID
I feel absolute pride. I like how polished it is, wearable and easy.
WHAT I SAID
There’s something futuristic clinician about this look to me.
WHAT THE JUDGES SAID
Isaac Mizrahi loves the “naughty” eyelet fabric, though he feels the shorts are kind of moderate, and not at all “swoon worthy.”.
Nina Garcia thinks it would be a trick to put it on, and wishes the back had the same detail as the front, although she’s getting nurse in a sports bra from it.
Kelly Osbourne likes the white, and candy Crush inspired fabric.
The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called contemporary, not aspirational; she says it’s “too nothing.”.
Alyssa Milano thinks it looks like an apron.
It was clear from the runway that the winner would be Ken. His design was cool and resort and simple and chic.
Stanley and Fabio are safe, leaving Anthony and Edmond in the Bottom.
Was it the School Nurse who went home, or was it the Morgue Model? Well, I knew before it happened that Edmond was done.
I’ll miss him.
Stanley saying his look is Amal Clooney at Lake Cuomo. Cuomo? Um, it's Como.
Fabio and ken and Stanley are all making a dress over pants and not one changes their design. I thought it might go bad, but there was just enough of a difference to make each look seem different than the next.
Ken’s monster pincushion on his arm was kinda scary.
And I loved Ken teasing Fabio at Mood about their looks:
Fabio: “I’m making a jumpsuit.”
Ken: “I’m making a jumpsuit, too.”
Fabio: “Are you? I’m making a wide-legged jumpsuit.”
Ken: “I am, too.”
Fabio: “Are you really?”
Fabio: “Are you color blocking?”
Ken: “Hell, no.”
Fabio: “Okay, then.”
I still remember Ken’s anger issues on his season and am amazed every week at how much he smiles and less angry he is; what ever he did, worked. And he’s far cuter with a smile.
As usual, Anthony scores Lines of the Night, with this one about Edmond:
“Listen, Helen Keller can see that this man is struggling with his scuba suit.”
And this line about Stanley’s look:
“This is, like, a lot of fabric. I don’t understand why the dress wasn’t enough. And there’s a hat! I mean, it’s very intense.”
I loved Anne calling herself The Nina Whisperer.
Well, The Tents. Edmond missed it by thatmuch because it looks like all four remaining men will create a six-look collection next week, though maybe only three will show at Fashion Week. And I’m good with whoever shows and will miss whoever doesn’t.
As for my winner, I’d like to see Fabio bring it, mostly because, like Georgina and Isaac, I love his personal style. Stanley has the chic gene, and Anthony has the Drama Gene and Ken the Tailoring Gene, so whatever happens, I think this will be a good finale.
What did YOU think?
Jeff Flake, Arizona’s retiring GOP Senator, on the GOP and _____:
“Never has a party abandoned and fled its principles and deeply held beliefs so quickly as my party did in the face of the nativist juggernaut. If we are going to cloister ourselves in the alternative truth of an erratic leader, if we are going to refuse to live in the world that everyone else lives in and reckon with the daily reality that they face, including the very real anxiety that they feel, then my party might not deserve to lead. As we are discovering and as we will discover for years to come, there is no damage like the damage a president can do.”
I like that Flake is taking on the GOP and _____ by speaking out, but howsabout putting your money where your mouth is and leaving the GOP and taking them on as an independent or a Democrat?
Francesco Mangiacapra, a “marchettaro,” a male prostitute servicing gay men, on why he exposed 40 gay and sexually active priests:
“I released this dossier because I wanted to expose the ‘bad apples,’ not to throw mud at the Catholic Church but to help her get rid of the rot that contaminates the healthy part. The behavior of these priests is, in many cases, the fruit of bad leadership in which priests are allowed to do the opposite of what they preach. This kind of ‘schizophrenic’ morality is typical of the hierarchy. The paradox of my relationship with the clergy is that there is a role reversal in which I am a sinner denouncing the priests who are the supposedly moral leaders but are committing sin. Those priests throw stones from their glass houses and the bishops make sure that all those stone-throwers are never exposed! In my book, and now with this dossier, I demonstrate that there is a real lobby of gay priests, a freemasonry, an underground.”
Every time you expose a religious hypocrite, an angel gets its wings.
Cory Michael Smith, Edward Nygma AKA The Riddler on Gotham, coming out as gay and starring in 1985, a new film that takes place during the first years of the AIDS crisis:
“I’m from Middle America. I’m from Ohio. I’ve been living [in New York] for a while, and there are stretches when I don’t see my family often. Going home and that whole charade is very familiar. The first family dinner after a while. Coming out to a family, the fear of that. I don’t ever want to insinuate or push that the queer experience is hindered with shame or darkness and depression … But I do think it is important to look at the gay experience in the early ’80s and know that it was overwhelmed by disease. It’s a film that is going back to a moment and telling a very personal story about the pain and suffering that certain people went through. Sometimes I think it’s OK to have a moment of silence and consider what that experience was.”
Lord, I have such a crush on Cory Michael Smith—I loves me some Riddler—and now to know that he’s a big old ‘mo?
Adam Schiff, on the GOP standing by _____:
“I think one of the really sad realizations over the last year is not what kind of a president Donald _____ turns out to be — I think it was all too predictable — but rather, how many members of Congress would be unwilling to stand up to him, and more than that, would be completely willing to carry water for him … I thought there would be more Jeff Flakes, more John McCains, more Bob Corkers — people who would defend our system of checks and balances, would speak out for decency, who would defend the First Amendment.”
It’s the Tribal Hypocrisy Syndrome; some in the GOP, a lot in the GOP, are so happy that the Black Man is out of office, they’ll do anything to keep a racist, misogynistic, lunatic in power.
That’s why we vote them out!
Charles Djou, former GOP Congressman, on leaving the party over _____:
“I can no longer stand with a Republican Party that is led by a man I firmly believe is taking the party of Lincoln in a direction I fundamentally disagree with, and a party that is unwilling to stand up to him. It disturbs me that the Republican Party under President Donald _____ is now defined as a party hostile to immigration.”
Hostile immigration; racism; criminal behavior; treason …the list is long.
But again, why leave? Stay and fight. Stand up for something for God’s sake.
Melania _____, wife of a TwitBully, and campaign bully, and presidential bully, acknowledging criticism of her stance against cyberbullying:
“I’m well aware that people are skeptical of me discussing this topic. I have been criticized for my commitment to tackling this issue and I know that will continue.”
Maybe try something new, and something you’re also familiar with: start a campaign to help wives married to men who sleep with porn stars … or who are Pussy Grabbers?
Better yet, Mel, take a seat and keep quiet.
John McCain, Ariznoa GOP Senator, on _____’s congratulatory phone call to Putin after his election “win”:
“An American president does not lead the Free World by congratulating dictators on winning sham elections. And by doing so with Vladimir Putin, President _____ insulted every Russian citizen who was denied the right to vote in a free and fair election.”
But he had to congratulate Putin because Putin got him elected here.
He’s Putin’s bitch.
Christine Quinn, openly gay former NYC Council Speaker, on openly gay Cynthia Nixon—who supported Quinn’s opponent, Mayor Bill De Blasio for mayor—running for governor of New York:
“It’s a flight of fancy on her part. Cynthia Nixon was opposed to having a qualified lesbian become mayor of New York City. Now she wants to be an unqualified lesbian to be the governor of New York. You have to be qualified and have experience. She isn’t qualified to be the governor.”
Quinn later apologized for palying the lesbian card:
“My point was never to say her sexual orientation — or anybodys — is a negative when they’re running for office."
To me it just seemed like sour grapes for Quinn, since Nixon didpn’t support her; just politics, eh?
Lt. Col. Ralph Peters, on why he’s leaving his post at Fox News:
“Four decades ago, I took an oath as a newly commissioned officer. I swore to ‘support and defend the Constitution,’ and that oath did not expire when I took off my uniform. Today, I feel that Fox News is assaulting our constitutional order and the rule of law, while fostering corrosive and unjustified paranoia among viewers. Over my decade with Fox, I long was proud of the association. Now I am ashamed. In my view, Fox has degenerated from providing a legitimate and much-needed outlet for conservative voices to a mere propaganda machine for a destructive and ethically ruinous administration. When prime-time hosts—who have never served our country in any capacity—dismiss facts and empirical reality to launch profoundly dishonest assaults on the FBI, the Justice Department, the courts, the intelligence community (in which I served), and, not least, a model public servant and genuine war hero such as Robert Mueller—all the while scaremongering with lurid warnings of ‘deep-state’ machinations—I cannot be part of the same organization, even at a remove. To me, Fox News is now wittingly harming our system of government for profit.”
Clearly, Fox News isn’t news. It’s just another arm of the _____ White House; it’s Kellyanne without the hideous make-up; it’s The Mooch without the pinkie ring;it's Sean Spicer without the angry spitting red face it’s Sarah Huckabee Sanders without the shapeshifting face.
Well, the bedroom has been painted and we have moved back to the king-sized bed, with two grown queens and three cats. Of course, now we need new lamps, drapes shapes, a ceiling fan and more, so there’s that.
But, while we were in the midst of painting and sleeping in the guest room, I had gone to bed early one night. Dozing a while, I heard Carlos go into our bedroom to use the bathroom, and then he came to bed. After dozing some more, I woke to hear a cat clawing the carpet; Consuelo has a nasty habit of that, but if you startle her with a loud noise, she stops.
I clapped my hands; she didn’t stop. I tried again; it didn’t work. I got out of the bed and went into the hallway where I heard a feeble little mew coming from the other side of the door into the master bedroom; clearly, she’d followed Carlos inside and found herself trapped.
The next morning, I told Carlos about it and he said:
“It’s her own fault, she should learn how to get out.”
Yes, he thinks a cat should learn how to open a bedroom door.
Joseph Segal, a London-based musician and performer, applied to a talent agency to represented him, but he was refused because …
“‘We already have a gay actor on our books and also an actor/musician of the same age. So we feel there would be a clash … I’m unable to consider you at the moment.”
Segal posted a screenshot of the email on his , slamming the homophobic talent agency:
“I am hurt and frustrated. Are all gay actors the same? Do we not get cast? Are there not enough roles for us?”
Suddenly, Segal began receiving support from other working actors, like Sherlock actor ‘Christ. This is scary. Reprehensible”—and Game of Thrones actor Tom Hopper—“Joseph, it is a disgrace that this agent has brought your sexuality in to the equation as a reason not to take you on. I’ve worked with many gay actors and they very often are playing a straight character and vice versa. So your sexuality is irrelevant to your casting eligibility”—and Matthew Lewis, Neville in Harry Potter—“This is mental. Do you wear a sign? Who gives a shit! How many straight actors they got? Any clashes? I heard Schwarzenegger wasn’t actually a cyborg from the future but they gave him the part anyway. Christ, [acting is literally pretending to be somebody you’re not. Sorry pal.”
Just as suddenly the agency apologized:
“We offer our sincerest of apologies to you and anyone else who may have taken offense. We feel ashamed about it, so ashamed we feel unable to defend it. ‘When choosing clients we look at all aspects the artist brings to the table and at no point should we have commented on your sexuality.”
Even more suddenly, the talent agency closed:
“The agency will close after a number of its clients leaving. This was an inexperienced agency, who I now know, was not a member of the necessary associations.”
Seriously; in this day and age.
Now, I am not exactly happy about this news, but it appears that Husband-In-My-Head, Anderson Cooper, has broken up with his longtime boyfriend, Benjamin Maisani:
“Benjamin and I separated as boyfriends some time ago. We are still family to each other, and love each other very much, we remain the best of friends, and will continue to share much of our lives together.”
Um, Andy? If you need a shoulder to cry on …or, you know, whatever, I’m here for you …
Speaking of gay men, this week Vice President Mike Pence ... see what I did there ... had breakfast with the new Irish Prime Minister Leo Varadkar—an openly gay man—and the meeting was closed to all media at the request of the vice president.
Huh. Mike Pence dines with a gay man behind locked doors?
Come out, come out, wherever you are, Mike.
Oh, I love Karma … for the first time in nearly twenty years, the American people turned against the National Rifle Association, with some 40% of those polled in an NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll having a negative view of the NRA, while 37% had a positive view.
Doesn’t sound like much, but it’s a significant drop from April 2017, when the same poll found a 45% positive to 33% negative divide.
Looks like the NRA will have to shell out more coins to buy their favorite politicians.
And they’ll still lose.
Just sayin’, but … there are some folks on the interwebz who think this dog looks like Ivanka _____.
In case you weren’t sure, Ivanka’s photo is on the bottom.
Last year, I posted about Racist Coworker and was pleased as punch when she left our employ to move back to whatever redneck, cousin’ fucking, toothless, corn cob pipe smoking hamlet she was from.
Sadly, she has returned to Smallville and to the same job.
Her first day back, I told myself, “Be nice. Be professional. Keep it professional.”
So, as she asked me a procedural question, I politely explained the answer to her, at which point she gave me that Pennywise Clown smile and asked how I was doing and how Carlos was—
I put up my hand and said, “No. We’re not doing this. If you have a work question or issue, I’m here to help. Anything outside the scope of that I don’t want to hear from you, m’kay?”
I thought I handled it well, because I really wanted to take my hands and smash her racist head in.
So, How to Get away with Murder ended without a murder mystery for the first time ever.
Sure, someone died, but we found out right away who the murderer was, but … in a surprising twist, it appears that the baby Annalise Keating thought had died during childbirth, actually lived and now he’s arrived at college … looking hot.
Rome Flynn plays the far too young for me because I have shoes older than him hottie.
Ah, rooms with a view … and a pool with a view.
This sunny Vancouver home sits atop a mountain to take advantage of views of the sea and surrounding forests from its terraces. And, of course, a pool on the terrace to cool off when the mood strikes.
I love its wide-open spaces, the minimalist design, the way the home hangs onto, and over, the rocks, but, yeah, it’s the view …
I might just live outside.