The Lincoln Project Pwns Jared and Ivanka

Grifters and criminals, Ivanka _____ and Jared Kushner, are pissy as all get out because The Lincoln Project set up a couple of billboards in Times Square criticizing _____’s COVID-19 response.

One sign features Ivanka in her signature Goya Beans pose alongside the death tally of New Yorkers and Americans killed by the virus. The other sign shows Jared next to enlarged text of a quote attributed to him, saying New Yorkers “are going to suffer and that’s their problem.”

Well, these two privileged co-conspirators in the murders of 220,000 + Americans have sent a cease-and-desist letter to The Lincoln Project demanding the “outrageous and shameful” signs be taken down or face legal action:

“Dear Lincoln Project Persons,

We represent Mr. Jared Kushner and Ms. Ivanka [_____]. I am writing concerning the false, malicious, and defamatory ads that the Lincoln Project is displaying on billboards in Times Square. Those ads show Ms. [_____] smiling and gesturing toward a death count of Americans and New Yorker, and attribute to Mr. Kushner the statement that “New Yorkers are going to suffer and that’s their problem” … with body bags underneath.

Of course, Mr. Kushner never made any such statement. Ms. [_____] never made any such gesture, and the Lincoln Project’s that they did are an outrageous and shameful libel. If these billboard ads are not immediately removed, we will sure you for what will doubtless be enormous compensatory and punitive damages.”

To be fair, Ivanka did make that gesture, though not in front of a death toll, and an attendee at a meeting where Jared Kushner spoke about New York Governor Andrew Cuomo’s COVID response, says he heard Kushner make that statement. Oh, and sadly enough, the letter was sent the same day that the U.S. set a new record in new coronavirus cases.

The Lincoln Project responded:

“The level of indignant outrage Jared Kushner and Ivanka [_____] have shown toward The Lincoln Project for exposing their indifference for the more than 223,000 Americans who have lost their lives to their reckless mismanagement of COVID-19 is comical. While we truly enjoy living rent free in their heads, their empty threats will not be taken any more seriously than we take Ivanka and Jared.

It is unsurprising that an administration that has never had any regard or understanding of our Constitution would try to trample on our first amendment rights, but we fully intend on making this civics lesson as painful as possible. Jared and Ivanka have always been entitled, out-of-touch bullies who have never given the slightest indication they have any regard for the American people. We plan on showing them the same level of respect.

The billboards will stay up. We consider it important that in Times Square, the crossroads of the world, people are continuously reminded of the cruelty, audacity, and staggering lack of empathy the [_____]s and the Kushners have displayed towards the American people.”

Oh snap.

Poor Feckless Cunt and Genderless Hubby.

The Funny Papers

Dave Whamond, Mike Luckovich, Gary Huck, Mike Smith, Jack Ohman, Nick Anderson, John Deering, Steve Benson, Michael de Adder, Adam Zyglis, Clay Bennett, Steve Sack, Darrin Bell, Ted Littleford, Dan Landgren

I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Kirstie Alley has been trending on Twitter again lately, but the only reason Kirstie Alley trends anywhere is not because what’s left of her career, but because she’s gone off the deep end again … like when she Tweeted this:

“I’m voting for [______] because he’s NOT a politician. I voted for him 4 years ago for this reason and shall vote for him again for this reason. He gets things done quickly and he will turn the economy around quickly. There you have it folks there you have it”

It’s hard to figure out if this is the craziest thing she’s ever done, or is it still the time she pretended to have lost a lot of weight on Jenny Craig and wore a bikini on Oprah. Nope, it’s clearly her political bent and TwitFits, like one where she seemed to show her support of QAnon:

“WHERE WE GO ONE WE GO ALL. I like it”

She likes pedophile conspiracy theorists, but hates … hates … Nancy Pelosi:

“The ‘process’ EVIL NANCY PELOSI speaks of is an attempt at a presidential takeover of a President by glorified BAKER ACT .. don’t believe a word that comes out of this witche’s [sic] mouth..and yes she gives witches a bad name.”

Off her meds. Off her rocker. Off her diet?

And lotsa people went after her on Twitter, though I did not because she’s blocked me, I might have questioned her membership in the Cult of Scientology and, if they believed in therapy,  would they get her to a therapist. But, you know, Tom Cruise wouldn’t have that, so people took other avenues to mock Kirstie, like a Twitterer named Don Moynihan:

“The President of the United States is, in fact, a politician. Granted, not one with basic skills of coalition-building or managing a government, but he is a politician in the worst possible meaning of the term: empty promises, exploiting fear and sowing hatred.”

Another named Timothy Dunn tells a personal story:

“I waited on Kirstie Alley back when she was the Jenny Craig lady. She tipped 20%, never made eye contact, and quietly asked me to discreetly bring her a coffee cup full of hot fudge, which I watched her eat WITH A SPOON, and no one can EVER take that precious memory away from me.”

And Bess Kalb nailed it:

“I wonder if Kirstie Alley would still vote for [_____] if she heard [______] privately describe Kirstie Alley.”

And then celebrities came for her, some with childish bites and some with sharp teeth.

Judd Apatow, was childish:

“Shelly Long was way funnier than you.”

Fellow actress Patricia Arquette was better:

“Well my vote for Biden canceled yours out. I have done my civic duty of the day.”

Meanwhile, comedian Natasha Rothwell used razor sharp teeth:

“Kirstie Alley’s tweet screamed ‘I can’t read! I don’t watch the news! Black Lives Don’t Matter! My body, your choice! and Pussies wear masks! And sexuality is a preference!' But all I can think about is how 87% of the people on here will have to google who she is.”

In the end, however, Kirstie was suddenly overwhelmed by the negativity:

“Don’t think I’ve ever seen so much name-calling in my life. Definitely not on my site here anyway I guess I’m not allowed to have a viewpoint without being called a really nasty names by what I’m going to suppose are really nasty people”

Funny she has a problem being called nasty names when she used Twitter to voice her support for a man who calls people he doesn’t like nasty names. But that’s Kirstie Alley, alone in her mansion, hooked on Scientology and a racist rapist president, so I’ll end with a Tweet that sums it all up, from The Hoarse Whisperer said:

“If MAGA and Scientology get a divorce, who gets custody of Kirstie Alley?”

Snap.

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Speaking of messes … how pathetic are you if you have to claim that you have been asked over and over and over again to be on Dancing With The Stars and have consistently turned it down because, as you stated, it’s just a show for hasbeens?

Pretty pathetic, especially since the show has countered your claims with the story that you have been asking for years and years to be a guest on DWTS and they have said,overand over:

“Who are you again.”

Tell us all about it, Taryn Manning.

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Issa Rae hosted Saturday Night Live for the first time last week and it’s all thanks to Kanye West.

Says Kanye West … at least until Raye dissed him. During a sketch on the show Raye played a fictional black political advocate who supports voting for “everybody black” on election day … everybody black except Kanye West:

“Kanye? F**k him.”

And suddenly, not surprisingly, Kanye was pissy, fuming:

“I’ve always said SNL uses black people to hold other black people back. My heart goes out to Issa Rae. I’m praying for her and her family. I know that the twenty years of service that I’ve paid in the entertainment field has furthered our ability to be more successful.”

Funny, that; SNL uses black people to hold other black people down, says the man who appeared on the show six times.

I think Kanye Karen needs to take a seat.

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Who knew a ticket to Disneyland could end a TV dynasty?

Shonda Rhimes. The TV maven—who made some $2 billion for ABC with shows like Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal—has revealed that a fight over a ticket to Disneyland led her to exit the network.

Included in her ABC contract was a non-transferrable pass to the theme park and—because she was single—she negotiated a second pass for her daughters’ nanny.

But then one day she needed an extra pass so her sister could take Rhimes’ teenage daughter to the park while the nanny chaperoned her younger daughters, and Rhimes claims ABC said no more tickets and so she walked.

A one-day Park Hopper ticket to Disneyland in 2019 cost $199 and Shonda walked because she had to pay for it herself? Sorry, not sorry that a millionaire TV producer had to pay for a couple of passes to a theme park.

Gimme a break.

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Oh Susan Sarandon, take a good long seat. The actress, who famously sparred with actress Debra Messing, over the 2016 elections, is now taking on Cher.

CHER????

Susan is throwing shade by telling the story that Cher’s role in The Witches of Eastwick was originally hers, but that Cher stole it from her.

CHER????

Here’s the real tea: Angelica Huston—Jack Nicholson’s girlfriend at the time—was originally considered for Alexandra but gave a bad audition and so the role went to Cher.  But then Susan stepped up with her own story from out of the blue, saying she was cast in Cher’s role, but right before filming started, she learned that she was switched to the role of Jane:

“I initially was cast in Cher’s part, and didn’t find out till I got to LA—because I was living in Rome—that I was actually moved to a different part. I had to learn suddenly to play the cello, and I had never played an instrument in my life. They said they would sue me if I left, so I didn’t have much choice!”

Susan then implied that Cher had a “thing” with the film’s producer Jon Peters and that’s how she got the role:

“That’s Jon … [He] and Cher had a past liaison or something, so that  was another element.”

To prove that Susan is kinda nutty, she also claims that she could’ve been in The First Wives Club, but she turned down one of the roles—she won’t say which one—because she didn’t want to partake in a women-hating-on-women plot.

She doesn’t want to be part of a women-hating-women movie but says Cher fucked her way into a film role?

She’s Cher, bitch.

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I Didn't Say It ...

Rudy Giuliani, raging about a scene in the sequel to Sacha Baron Cohen’s Borat, in which he plays with his genitals on a bed while having a drink with the actress who plays Borat’s 15-year-old daughter:

“The Borat video is a complete fabrication. I was tucking in my shirt after taking off the recording equipment. At no time before, during, or after the interview was I ever inappropriate. If Sacha Baron Cohen implies otherwise he is a stone-cold liar. In fact, the NY Post today reports ‘it looks to me like an exaggeration through editing.’ As soon as I realized it was a set up I called the police, which has been noted in THR article on July 8th. This is an effort to blunt my relentless exposure of the criminality and depravity of Joe Biden and his entire family. Deadline Hollywood reports CAA had a distribution screening in September where there was no mention of the scene holding any importance. We are preparing much bigger dumps off of the hard drive from hell, of which Joe Biden will be unable to defend or hide from. I have the receipts.”

This looks like, as someone said on Twitter, a clear-cut case of “erection fraud.”

Oh, and Rudy, who lays down on a bed to tuck in their shirt?

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Michael Steele, former Chair of the Republican Party, has endorsed Joe Biden for president:

“America has watched as the Republican Party stopped pursuing its animating principles of freedom and opportunity [and] given up its voice on things that mattered and instead bent the arc of the party towards the baser motives of one man, who is neither a Republican nor a conservative. Rather than binding up the nation’s wounds, _____ exacerbates division. Rather than standing up to the world’s dictators, ______ cravenly seeks the favor of thugs. Rather than fostering free enterprise, _____embraces economic principles not only outdated in Lincoln’s time, but made even worse today by a leader who lost close to a billion dollars in a single year running a casino. Rather than seeking to build on the legacy of the Republican Party’s founders, of which ______ is surely ignorant, _____ has posited a single purpose for the GOP—the celebration of him. I long to restore that trust with the American people. However, what many inside and outside the GOP fail to grasp now is that our lack of standing with the American people is not the fault of our ideals or the principles we espouse, but rather due to our failure to stand up against the arrogance of power and the erosion of our principles.”

I doubt the GOP will ever fully recover from their blind devotion to a racist rapist lying pig and I’m good with that!

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Dan Rather, on the GOPers who are suddenly trying to distance themselves from _____:

“It’s tempting to use the analogy of rats fleeing a sinking ship to describe the growing number of Republican elected officials starting to speak out against Donald _____. But that’s really not fair to rats, who tend not to be complicit in driving ships to the bottom of the sea.”

It’s too little, too late; where were their balls and backbones all these years.

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Dr. Anthony Fauci, on ______ contracting COVID-19:

“I was worried he was going to get sick when I saw him in a completely precarious situation of crowded, no separation between people, and almost nobody wearing a mask. When I saw that on TV I said [Fauci face palms with both hands] ‘Oh my goodness.’ Nothing good can come out of that. That’s gotta be a problem. And then sure enough it turned out to be a superspreader event.”

Science. I believe it; I believe Fauci.

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Ben Sasse, GOP Senator from Nebraska, ripped ______ in a phone call with constituents:

“The way he kisses dictators’ butts. I mean, the way he ignores the Uighurs, our literal concentration camps in Xinjiang. Right now, he hasn’t lifted a finger on behalf of the Hong-Kongers. The United States now regularly sells out our allies under his leadership, the way he treats women, spends like a drunken sailor. The ways I criticize President Obama for that kind of spending; I’ve criticized President Trump for as well. He mocks evangelicals behind closed doors. His family has treated the presidency like a business opportunity. He’s flirted with white supremacists.”

Oh, Ben, he’s been doing this for years, so quit acting all faux-indignant. You carried water for him since election day 2016, so, no, I don’t care what you think now. If he wins reelection, you’re start goose-stepping all over again.

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Caroline Giuliani, Rudy’s daughter, coming out as a Biden supporter:

“I am a filmmaker in the LGBTQ+ community who tells stories about mental health, sexuality, and other stigmatized issues, and my goal is to humanize people and foster empathy. So, I hope you’ll believe me when I say that another ______ term … will irrevocably harm the LGBTQ+ community, among many others. His administration asked the Supreme Court to let businesses fire people for being gay or trans, pushed a regulation to let health care providers refuse services to people who are LGTBQ+, and banned trans people from serving their country in the military. I fully understand that some of you want a nominee who is more progressive. For others the idea of voting for a Democrat of any kind may be a hurdle. Now I have another confession to make. Biden wasn’t my first choice when the primaries started. But I know what is at stake, and Joe Biden will be everyone’s president if elected. If you are planning to cast a symbolic vote or abstain from voting altogether, please reconsider.”

While Daddy is adjusting his Little Rudy on film while his daughter is standing for America.

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This Is How It's Done ... Jennifer Hudson 'Tomorrow'

 

Bobservations

First story: as we inch toward Halloween I would like to share the three scariest words in my life; it’s Carlos saying:

“I … was … thinking … ”

Shivers.

Second story: because we are such true romantics, we decided that the 20th anniversary gift is garden equipment, so we bought a new lawn mower.

Who said romance is dead? Not me!

If you were looking for a good reason to vote, Tuxedo says you should think of it like this:

I am dying over here because my favorite serial killer is coming back to TV.

Showtime has announced that Dexter will be back next year, with star Michael C. Hall, for 10 new episodes.

I’m here for the Bay Harbor Butcher again.

Merriam-Webster dictionary has changed “sexual preference” to be an “offensive” term  after SCOTUS nominee Amy Coney Barrett used the term—twice—and didn’t acknowledge it, or faux-pologize, until Senator Mazie Hirono took her to task for it; the dictionary says:

“The term preference as used to refer to sexual orientation is widely considered offensive in its implied suggestion that a person can choose who they are sexually or romantically attracted to.”

Merriam-Webster confirmed the change was made because of Barrett’s homophobia.

It’s not just ReTHUGlicans who are despicable, sometime Democrats are just as asshatted.

Last week Georgia state Representative Vernon Jones, a conservative MAGAt-loving, _____-supporting Democrat, crowdsurfed over a packed, mostly maskless crowd at ______’s superspreader rally in Macon.

Again, I don’t wish the virus on anyone, but if Jones were to come down with COVID-19 I might not really care.

From the Stupid File comes ______, who warned a crowd at a Corona-palooza rally in Nevada that Joe Biden would “listen to the scientists” if elected.

Oh no! Not science! ______ then added:

“If I listened totally to the scientists, we would right now have a country that would be in a massive depression.”

I guess millions and millions out of work doesn’t matter as long as the markets go up.

Cast a goddamned vote!!

More stupid? CNN analyst and New Yorker contributor Jeffrey Toobin was caught masturbating on a Zoom “election simulation” in front of prominent journalists and producers.

Seriously? A grown-ass man in the middle of a zoom call, takes a break and decides to whip out his dick for a few strokes, without turning off the camera?

The New Yorker has suspended Toobin, and he has taken a leave from CNN.

Moving on to The Liar File … a few weeks ago ______ said he would spend up to $100 million of his own money on his reelection bid. Cut to October and ______ has contributed about $8,000.

Maybe he doesn’t really want it this time … or he’s broke … so let’s give him his wish.

Cast a goddamned vote!

Last week SCOTUS declared that Pennsylvania mail-in ballots that are received up to three days after the election must be counted,  and this week a U.S. federal appeals court left in place North Carolina’s plan for counting absentee ballots that arrive after Election Day.

A smackdown for _____,  but a win for democracy and free and fair elections.

Despite a federal judge's order that the US reunite families separated at the border under _____’s "no tolerance" immigration policy, the parents of 545 children still can't be found.

Thanks America; you’re complicit in stealing children from their parents. How proud we must be.

This week Pope Francis called for the passage of civil union laws for same-sex couples.

Look at that! The Pope and, by extension, the Catholic Church, have finally arrived … in 2000. How long before they join the rest of us in 2020?

After all this rubbish, I need a beefy hunk to cleanse my palate … so here’s Tom Berklund, an out Broadway actor, singer, dancer, and, as you can see, a very hot man.

He sings, he dances, he poses in his underwear … 

Okay  … 

Architecture Wednesday: Shelter Island

They often call modern homes “white boxes,” but this one is more “two white boxes at an angle” that you can buy for $3.95 million … fully furnished!

Deedles?

It is located near Sunset Beach, just minutes from Shelter Island ferry access points, and is a good sized home … 3200 square feet with five bedrooms and four bathrooms on a wooded lot a bit shy of an acre. Completed in 2019 the modern masterpiece has a comfortable flow across three levels with multiple walk out terraces, including a spectacular 1100 square-foot rooftop terrace.

Plus, in addition to being sleek and modern, it’s also very smart. Every single window is equipped with custom built-in electric shades and uses Nest smart home technology, Sonos surround sound system, built in closet organizers in every bedroom closet, seamless built in custom cabinets, gym, theater room, outdoor shower, fire pit sitting area, two car garage and three gated entry access points.

I like the sleek, the modern, all the windows, the plot of land, and really liker that, when I buy it, I only need to bring a beach towel, flip-flops and my tooth brush.

And Tuxedo, of course!

Dwell