Bobservations

The other morning Carlos was part of a Zoom meeting so he took his computer back to the office for an hour or so. After he finished., I was getting ready to leave for work when he said he’d figured out some more steps to use Zoom to make it easier for him.

“I can use Alt A to mute myself and when I want to speak, I press and hold the space bar and I can talk. When I’m done I release the spacebar and it goes back to mute.”

“I wish I had a spacebar to mute a conversation because I’d start with this one.”

Again, the man loves me, and I don’t know why!

Sidenote: I love how he’s learning to adapt to his new situation.

This Tuxedo Memory if from November 2018 and is entitled:

“For Deedles”

“Here’s another shot of Tuxedo with his bat wings; he doesn’t lay like that all the time, but I think he does it to protect his paws.

And there he is looking gorgeous, followed by him laying atop a sofa, with his legs dangling. Having no claws in his front paws, he often lets his legs just hang down.”

I often called him BatCat for laying down like that!

Last Saturday French athlete Anthony Ammirati didn't move past the qualification round in the Olympic men's pole vault competition due to the interference of a second pole.

As you can see Ammirati is seen trying to clear a 5.70m bar but as he’s falling back to the ground the very noticeable bulge in his spandex suit catches the bar and knocks it all the way down.

The best X comment was something about Drag Queens teaching pole vaulters to tuck but the good news is that Ammirati’s profile has skyrocketed, his Instagram followers have ballooned to over 170,000 and already gotten a quarter million dollar offer from a porn site. 

Plus, he has an enormous dick.

PS Here’s the new logo for the Paris Olympics.

Jennifer Lopez is still wearing her engagement ring from Ben Affleck amid divorce rumors … but on her right hand where it couldn’t be missed when she held her red pocketbook just so.

Sigh. JLo gave up her tour that was bombing so she could stay home and work on her family, but then she went to Italy alone and posed in bikinis on yachts, and then jetted to the Hamptons where she threw herself a costume birthday party.

But Ben was busy, too ... purchasing a new bachelor pad.

One fact that I love about Tim Walz, Kamala’s Harris’ Veep pick is that during his career as a high school teacher, in the same year he coached the football team to a state title he also served as the faculty advisor to the school’s first Gay Straight Alliance Club.

Top that sofafucker.

You know, when you think about it, one of the reasons the weird thing is sticking is: if literally ANY of us met a nearly 80-yerar-old man who dyed his hair bright yellow and wore really bad orange pancake makeup we’d whisper to our friends”

“That guys’ fucking weird.”

Just sayin’.

NFL star Marlon Humphrey—I never heard of him either—blasted Olympic champions Simone Biles and Jordan Chiles for bowing down to Brazilian gymnast Rebeca Andrade after she clinched the gold medal in the floor exercise final, saying:

“This is literally disgusting.”

Humphrey faced blowback instantly, whining, again, on X:

“I’m lowkey getting cooked right now. I think I’m getting cussed out in Brazilian [sic] on Instagram lol.”

Two things, asshat:

1] two world class gymnasts celebrated the Gold medal winner during the medal ceremony and you think it’s disgusting.

And B] It’s Portuguese they speak in Brazil, not Brazilian … and for goddess’s sake, learn to spell or stay off social media.

PS It was the first all-Black gymnastics podium.

Do you ever wonder if a camel looks at his toes and says, Damn, I have vagina foot?

Giancarlo Commare is a thirty-two-year-old  Italian actor but the real issue is: Would You Hit It?

Meme Dump

Bobservations

Carlos sets the alarm for 7AM every day. He rolls out of bed at &:05 and heads into the bathroom for about fifteen minutes., When he comes out Consuelo and Tuxedo enter the bedroom announcing their desire for breakfast and their plaintive yowls awaken me, and I drag myself from bed.

Yesterday morning, though, Carlos stirred and dragged himself from bed. I loved at the clock, 6:55AM. I hear Carlos in the bathroom for a moment and then he comes out and goes back in bed at 6:58AM. I say:

“Isn’t it time to get up?”

“I have a couple of more minutes.”

And he took them!

Even Tuxedo sees how the GOP is suddenly pro-Russia and anti-Democracy, and how the rightwingnut media is playing this as a fight between Russia and Ukraine, and not an attack by Russia on Ukraine.

In court this week North Carolina state attorneys said a provision of the 14th Amendment—disqualifying insurrectionists from holding federal office—is not a defunct Civil War-era relic meant to apply only to former Confederates but a guard against future acts of insurrection and can be used to keep Nazi poster Boy Madison Cawthorn off the ballot for reelection.

Cawthorn says the provision was intended to apply only to former confederates who fought in the Civil War and a subsequent 1872 “amnesty” law waived the 14th Amendment prohibition for confederates. But the state attorneys argued that Congress itself applied the prohibition in 1919 against Victor Berger, who was barred from office for violating the Espionage Act during World War I.

Oops Maddie. You might be banned from office.

So, there was the Olympics right? We watched some, but it seemed every single time we turned it on, the event was curling. Curling!!!!! But I digress … See, I heard the story of men’s 50km mass start cross-country Finnish skier Remi Lindholm who revealed to the world that his penis froze during the race.

The weather was so frigid on race day that the event  was delayed by an hour and shortened from 50kms to 30kms. Some skiers finished with frost on their faces, but not Remi, who came in 28^th:

“You can guess which body part was a little bit frozen when I finished.”

Yes, Remi suffered from Frozen Penis Syndrome and needed a heat pack to help thaw out his junk. And that had me thinking: Perhaps I should offer my services at the next Winter Olympics as the Official Dicksicle Warmer™? It’s a thought.

Carlos and I have had to make a lot of adjustments with his declining eyesight, but we still manage to get a laugh out of it, too. Take the other day, for example,  as we were leaving a shop and Carlos had my arm. We got to our car and I said:

“To your right, and then down the side of the car to the door.”

And I proceeded down the left side of the car to the driver’s door and got in. I looked to my right and didn’t see him, and wondered where he’d gone,  and then I saw him. He was walking down the side of the car parked next to us and tried to get into that car! I rolled the window down:

“Choch! [That’s a nickname for him] that’s not our car!”

He came back around and got into our car, and said:

“I just thought it might be a nicer ride.”

And that’s when we learned that when we arrive back at the car, I will tell him we are behind it, and he can walk down the side to the passenger door.

It’s a process, but we do get a laugh out of it every now and again.

Speaking from firsthand experience, when one door closes and another door opens, you're probably in prison.

In Georgia, jurors  deliberated for two days before finding Travis McMichael, Gregory McMichael, and William Bryan  guilty of committing federal hate crimes and other offenses in the 2020 murder of Ahmaud Arbery.

Wait, it took them two days? These white men chased down a Black man and murdered him because he was jogging in their neighborhood.,

These convictions could add more life sentences to the conviction of the three murderers.

Good.

I saw this on the interwebz the other day and I was torn between the man and the look. I was thinking that if he removed the clothing I could make up my mind.

There is a ‘What’s Happening in Camden’ page on Facebook that I peruse every so often. It’s mostly about lost pets, found pets, and what’s that new building gonna be. Sadly, the page doesn’t have a spell check, or a grammar check or a Southern education check. This was a recent post:

“My dog went missing we seen her at neighbors house but neighbors want give her back police was call said since she had no chip or DNA it will be hard getting her back, what should I do now?”

Um, go back to school? This explains why, when I jokingly tell people I was born and raised in South Carolina, and they say I don’t sound like it, that I reply:

“That’s because I graduated from the fifth grade.”

I may get killed one day. 

Edison Fan, an Asian model who created both OMG Sportswear and U-Touch Underwear. He lives as an openly gay model in China, of all places, with his son. But the real question is: Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

The other day Carlos said to me:

“I have good news.”

“What is it?”

“I will be out of the house for a while tomorrow.”

I shouted, “Thank you Jesus” and threw myself to the ground in ecstasy, as Carlos continued:

“I have a translation in Columbia at …”

“I don’t need details, let me savor the thought.”

It all faded away as I  smiled at the idea of being home alone. I am a person who doesn’t mind being alone, in fact, I like it sometimes, but with Carlos working only from home during the pandemic, and me working from home two or three days a week, he’s always around. So I reveled in my joy.

The next day came and off he went. I puttered around the house, read a book, listened to music, did some laundry, sat on the ack deck with Tuxedo, and a few hours later Carlos called and told me he had a surprise; I said:

“You’re staying out?”

“No. I have a surprise for you.”

“Yeah, you’re staying out?”

“No. I’ll give it to you when I get home.”

I thought, Mitchell brings San Geraldo flowers every so often, so maybe it’s flowers? Nope. Even better … a Chori-Pollo dinner from one of our local Mexican restaurants. He knows me so well.

My husband. I think I’ll keep him.

I mean, come on. Tuxedo can’t even vote or fire a gun and he understands this nonsense. Sheesh!

Over there on Fox News Lies, Maria Bartiromo complained to Eric The Dumb One about President Biden's 5th trip home to Delaware, and The Dumb One said, with a straight, hideous face:

"I don't even know where to begin. It's heartbreaking to us. I saw how much time & effort my father put into the job."

Yes, he did.

Well, I always knew I had some affinity for travelling to Oz but I never really saw it until now.

Two weeks after eight people were gunned down in Atlanta, the Georgia Senate approved legislation to loosen the state’s gun laws. State Senator, and certified Qidiot, Bo Hatchett said:

“This is a Second Amendment protection bill that further recognizes Georgia’s commitment to protect its citizens and their Second Amendment rights.”

But NOT their right to vote.

On the upside in Georgia, after a week of saying almost nothing about the state’s new restrictive voting policies, two of the state’s biggest corporations, Coca-Cola and Delta, have both announced that they oppose the new voter suppression legislation. Okay, so maybe now you can put your money, your product and your influence out there, like, well, like this:

And Delta, since one of your famous taglines is:

“We love to fly and it shows.”

… howsabout a new one where you get people to the polls, or that lone voter drop-box? I think:

“We love to drive people to vote, and it shows.”

… sounds nice.

Volkswagen’s American division slipped up a bit this week with an announcement that suggested the company’s name will change in a nod toward the automaker’s investment in electric vehicles.

The company will be called Voltswagen,

The slip-up appeared briefly on Volkswagen’s media site before it was removed, but VW was not hacked, and the announcement is no joke; it’s not a marketing ploy and the plan is for the change to be made permanent.

Just not right now.

Well, this was kind of a cool message I got on Twitter this week:

Hi, Bob!

I've updated my blogroll and made sure to include you. Also, your "Gaggle of Qidiots" story has been added to today's "News & Pop Culture Round-Up" on Stonewall Gazette. Cheers

Shane Smith, Editor

And here’s my link. Very nice, I must say!

This week’s morsel is one Janis Danner, a German born model who simmers and smolders.

Those eyes! That smile! That hair! That body!

I was thinking of asking him to Smallville, where, and I’m quoting Bette Midler here, I would dress up like Poland and he could invade me?