Saturday, February 23, 2019

I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

The one good thing about Dina Lohan getting Catfish’d on national TV by longtime, unseen boyfriend-cum-fiancé, Jesse Nadler, is that it’s brought the Lohan’s back together. Dina’s first ex-husband, Michael, spoke out in support of Dina and her new man, and now Lindsay is speaking … because she knows a hot mess and a publicity op when she sees one.

Lindsay took to Instagram to congratulate Dina for her “performance” on Celebrity Big Brother—even though she lost to “celebrity” Tamar Braxton—but then Lindsay took on CBS for the way they treated Dina during the show … and then suddenly deleted the post; perhaps she’s looking to be the next houseguest on that idiotic show? Luckily, the internet lives on when people post and repost and share, so here goes …
“Finally #family @alianalohan #free @cbs_bigbrother you suck and get no Valentine’s from @lohanbeachclub @mtv. My mother is an AMAZING woman and she did so well. The secrets she told me a few hours ago are going to #EXPOSE #YOUALL #dinalohan #dfwm.”
Is she trying to support her mother, or her Vanderpump Rules knockoff show on MTV that is used mainly as a test pattern during the network’s off hours? I mean, the only thing Lindsay Lohan has ever exposed are her titties, her “firecrotch”, and her penchant for jewel theft, driving drunk, and bar fights.

Take a seat, Lohan, under the bar where you belong.

PS That’s an old photo of the Lohan’s, but since they will always be hot messes, I thought I’d resurrect it.
Last week we learned that an unnamed male friend of Miranda Lambert’s got into a shouting match in a restaurant bathroom which caused Miranda to toss a salad, literally, not figuratively, on an unsuspecting woman. And this week we learned that the unnamed man is none other than Miranda’s next ex-husband, and self-professed ‘hot cop’, Brendan McLoughlin, whom she married on the fly in January.

This is all nothing new for Miranda because, remember, in February 2018, Miranda dumped Anderson East, her Blake Shelton jump-off, after several years together. Not bad, but this is also the month she began touring with Evan Felker. In April, Miranda and the married Evan Felker, profess their love for one another and Miranda ALLEGEDLY begins stalking Evan’s not-yet-ex-wife Staci on social media.

In August, Miranda and Evan seem to be drifting apart because Evan is friendly with the wife he left to get with Miranda, and just as the Felker’s divorce comes though, Miranda dumps Even because he “broke her rules.” Rules about staying friends with your ex? After a dry spell of about eight weeks, Miranda meets and falls in love with Officer Brendan McLoughlin, who has his own baggage because … in November Officer Brendan McLoughlin becomes a first-time father … with a woman he cheated on his fiancé with, while the fiancé was out of town.

Let’s get this queer … shortly after dumping Evan, Miranda met, hooked up with, and fell in love with daddy-to-be Brendan McLoughlin who left his Baby Mama, and his fiancé for Lambert.

It seriously seems that Miranda Lambert has never seen a home she didn’t want to wreck and didn’t fall for guys who were in the same frame of mind.
You’d almost feel sorry for Khloe Kardastrophe if you hadn’t seen this coming a thousand miles away, but …

Khloe’s baby daddy, basketballer Tristan Thompson, who cheated on his pregnant girlfriend with Khloe, and then dumped that girl for Khloe, got her pregnant and then cheated on her while she was pregnant, has ALLEGEDLY been dribbling his balls on the court belonging to Jordyn Woods, not only a former model for Khloe’s clothing line, but also a BFF of sister Kylie.

Seriously, you can’t write this shiz up, but you know That Woman is looking for a way to film it for E! before Miranda and Brendan sell their story to Lifetime.

And that was the straw that ended their relationship; not that Khloe knew Tristan was a cheater when she met him, because he was cheating on his pregnant girlfriend with her, and not because he cheated on pregnant Khloe, but because he cheated with a friend of Kylie’s and, what amounts to, one of Khloe’s employees.

Set the cameras up for A Very Special Episode of Keeping Up With the Kardastrophes, where Khloe learns what the rest of the world knew a few years ago … Tristan cheats.

As for Jordyn Woods … apparently, none of the Kardastrophe-Jenner’s are following her on social media anymore; the ultimate burn.
Remember when we talked about the doctor suing Gwyneth Paltrow for snowplowing into him on the ski slopes?

Well, she is outraged! Outraged, I tells ya, and she is counter-suing Dr. Terry Sanderson, claiming he skied into her and she should know because she basically invented skiing just before she invented yoga. And she wants coins in retribution … four quarters, or ten dimes, or twenty nickels or one hundred pennies …or just a crisp dollar bill. Yes, Gwynnie wants a dollar, y’all.

In the suit, Gwyneth claims that on the day in question—three years ago—she was, in fact, skiing at the Deer Valley Resort in Utah and was “on one of the easier runs … making ‘short turns’” when the incident occurred. Gwyneth has the resort’s incident report which states Sanderson “took her out from behind” which I hear is how she likes it, but that’s another post for another day. She claims Sanderson says in the report that “she appeared right in front of him, thus admitting he was the uphill skier.”

Sanderson maintains Gwyneth was out of control and hit him from behind, which might be how he likes it, and says he suffered several injuries.

Gwyneth claims that Sanderson told the ski patrol at the time that everything was fine, but now he wants $3 million plus a slew of damages; and she’s only asking for a dollar because she’s never actually seen such a small denomination and she wants it lacquered to a jade egg she can hold in her vagina while she chants.

Or something.

Friday, February 22, 2019

I Didn't Say It ...

Joe Kennedy III, on the ALLEGED crisis at the border:

“Twenty-two immigrants have died in ICE detention over the last two years. Two kids died in CBP [Customs and Border Protection] custody in the last two months. 15,000 migrant’s kids are held in custody. Donald _____ is right that we are facing a horrible humanitarian crisis. He just leaves out the part about him creating it.”

Sidenote: Joe looks a lot like actor Sam Heughan—Jamie in Outlander—and that’s hot.
Lindsey Graham, South Carolina Senator and _____ lap dog, on the wall and that ALLEGED national emergency:

“I would say it's better for the middle school kids in Kentucky to have a secure border ... right now we've got a national emergency on our hands.”

Yes, Miss Lindsey doesn’t want children educated, schools fixed, roads built, potable water back in Flint.
He wants a wall because his lips are pressed so hard against _____ sphincter that he can’t see what’s happening.
Fuck Lindsey Graham.
Andrew McCabe, former FBI director, on the insanity of _____ and his devotion to Putin:

“The president launched into several unrelated diatribes. One of those was commenting on the recent missile launches by the government of North Korea. And, essentially, the president said he did not believe that the North Koreans had the capability to hit us here with ballistic missiles in the United States. And he did not believe that because President Putin had told him they did not. President Putin had told him that the North Koreans don’t actually have those missiles. Intelligence officials in the briefing responded that that was not consistent with any of the intelligence our government possesses. To which the president replied, ‘I don’t care. I believe Putin’.”

And I don’t care which side you fall on politically, but that should scare the sh*t outta you.
Sidenote: Hot.
Lynn Hutchings, GOP Senator from Wyoming, who first appeared here last week as an ignorant homophobe, arguing that without the death penalty, Jesus Christ would not have been able to die to absolve the sins of mankind:

“The greatest man who ever lived died via the death penalty for you and me. I’m grateful to him for our future hope because of this. Governments were instituted to execute justice. If it wasn’t for Jesus dying via the death penalty, we would all have no hope.”

Lord, Wyoming, what the f*ck did you do sending this asshat to represent you?
I mean, unless you’re are as ignorant, bigoted and unhinged as Hutchings, I cannot explain this.
Adam Schiff, Democratic Senator and House Intelligence Committee Chairman, pushing back against GOP Senate Intelligence Committee Chairman Richard Burr who claims the panel has not found evidence of collusion:

“You can see evidence in plain sight on the issue of collusion, pretty compelling evidence. Now, there’s a difference between seeing evidence of collusion and being able to prove a criminal conspiracy beyond a reasonable doubt.” 

And if you can’t prove collusion, you can prove obstruction of justice and you can prove he’s a crook and a criminal.
Ron Johnson, Wisconsin Republican Senator, on why the GOP didn’t approve _____’s border wall when they controlled Congress:

“You said we controlled both chambers. We didn’t. We had a majority in the Senate. So you don’t control it. We needed Democrats to support us and they’ve been unified in trying to thwart this president’s #1 issue in the campaign, which was to secure the borders. So no, we didn’t have control. We needed Democrats, we never had any cooperation from Democrats, which is regrettable.”

Oh, you ignorant tool. Don’t try to rewrite history. You had a majority in both Houses of Congress, you had a GOP President and a GOP-Conservative Supreme Court and you didn’t build a wall.
This isn’t the democrats, it’s the lying hypocritical thieving goosestepping Republicans … like asshat Ron Johnson.

Thursday, February 21, 2019


So, the other night, I announced I was going to sleep, but told Carlos I was first going to ‘check my fans,’ Carlos calls the people who read and comment on this bloggy thing my ‘fans;’ while, since he doesn’t blog, he says he’s checking his ‘acquaintances’ on Facebook.

But this isn’t about that. This is about, as I am off to check my fans, he says he needs to use to computer after 10:45PM to complete a money transfer for Tia Gloria/Her Social Security checks are direct deposited into an American band and once a month Carlos transfers funds to hear. But, since there is a limit on the number of coins you can transfer at one time, and you can only transfer once in a 24-hour period, he needs to finish the transfer he’d started the night before at 10:45.
“Oh. Then I guess I have to be off the computer in 25 minutes?”
“No. I’m just saying, leave it on and I’ll do a transfer after you’re done.”
“Well, I don’t wanna inconvenience anyone, so I’ll be done before 10;45.”
“You’re not incon—”
“I don’t want to bother anyone.”
“You’re not bother—”
“I don’t want to intrude …”
“You’re not intruding—”
“I don’t want to impose …infringe … overstep …”
“You’re not—”
“I don’t wanna rock to boat.”
I knew I’d get him. Boat.
Audrey Pence, the daughter of anti-LGBTQ and perhaps self-loathing homosexual Michael Elizabeth Pence, recently announced her engagement to Daniel Tomanelli on Instagram, with photos taken at Race Point Beach in the Massachusetts resort town of Provincetown …the gayest town in America.

Audrey has made her political views known and has called herself socially liberal and politically independent, though as far as the Pence kids go, Audrey may not be the only one who has rejected their father’s arch-conservative homophobia.

When John Oliver published his parody Marlon Bundo book, Charlotte Pence, who authored the original book about the Pence family bunny, said …
“His book is contributing to charities that I think we can all get behind… I’m all for it.”
And I’m sure Mother and Michael Elizabeth Pence weren’t thrilled about that, or Audrey saying ‘Yes’ in P-town … though I heard their first choice was The Castro?.
Jussie Smollett. It’s looking more and more like he faked his attack; he was arrested this morning for filing a false police claim about being attacked. Lotsa folks are doing the ‘I told you so’ dance at people like, well, me, because I believed him, but here’s the deal …

I will always believe a victim until I learn otherwise. The day I instantly decide that a person who says they are a victim of domestic violence, a hate crime, a rape, whatever, is a liar, is the day I am less human, and less humane.

That said, Jussie needs to apologize, explain, and go away, because when we have states in this country who don’t believe sexual orientation should be included in Hate Crime legislation, what Jussie did was feed that homophobia, and make it harder for LGBTQ folks to get the protection we need from people who hate us.

Thanks for nothing, Jussie.
Better news … Don Cheadle, one of my favorite actors and now one of my favorite people, hosted SNL last weekend and introduced the musical guest wearing that t-shirt:
“Protect Trans Kids”.
Cheadle’s career has been intertwined with LGBTQ issues for years, from playing the father of a gay, gender fluid son on House of Lies, and appearing in Logic’s 2017 clip “1-800-273-8255” which followed a gay teen as he inched toward taking his own life after he’s been outed having a relationship with a boy and subsequently rejected by his father and his boyfriend’s father.

Thanks Don. It wasn’t a huge gesture, but it spoke volumes.
Out on the West Coast, Contra Costa County Libraries,  set up an event called Drag Queen Story Hour, where drag queens would read to kids from books that display diversity and different gender identities.

Well, as happens, wingnuts got their panties in a snit, and set about protesting the event, calling it ‘inappropriate’ for children.

And, as happens, when the event began over 500 people showed up. Oh, not to protest, that was a much, much smaller group, but to attend the event … with their children.

Times do change.
Everyone from liberal media to conservative asshats like Lindsey Graham have questions _____’s sanity, though only Miss Lindsey has changed her mind and become ______’s lap dog, but nowhere was it more evident that the president is a narcissistic child than last weekend after SNL skewered him again.

And he TweetRanted:
“Nothing funny about tired Saturday Night Live on Fake News NBC! Question is, how do the Networks get away with these total Republican hit jobs without retribution? Likewise for many other shows? Very unfair and should be looked into. This is the real Collusion!”
Oh honey, it’s TV. If you think that’s collusion, then it’s clear you know nothing about the Mueller investigation.
GOP lawmakers in Wisconsin have forced the removal of quarterback Colin Kaepernick’s name from a state resolution marking Black History Month because they think  he’s too controversial … for kneeling protest of black men, women and children killed by police officers around the country.

I wonder if they’d have done the same for MLK or Rosa Parks?

Democratic Congressman David Crowley, who wrote the resolution, said the incident was “a textbook example of white privilege” and a “slap in the face” and said:
“Many of these people that you don’t agree with will still be in the history books that your children and grandchildren will be reading.”
Luckily, most of these GOP asshats and bigots will soon be forgotten.
In November 2016,  I blogged about Pamela Ramsey Taylor ... see post HERE ... who made a racist Facebook post about then-U.S. first lady Michelle Obama after _____’s election:
“It will be so refreshing to have a classy, beautiful, dignified First Lady back in the White House. I’m tired of seeing a [sic] Ape in heels.”
Well, Racist Pamela was fired from her job at a county development agency in West Virginia for being a racist tool, and that was good; this is better:

Pamela Ramsey Taylor just confessed to taking more than $18,000 in flood relief benefits after falsely registering for FEMA benefits after the June 2016. Taylor claimed that her primary residence had been damaged in the flood and that she was staying in a rental property, but it was proven that her primary residence was undamaged, and she was still living there.

In her plea agreement, Taylor agreed to pay restitution of $18,149.04, though she also faces up to 30 years in prison and a fine of up to $500,000 when she is sentenced on May 30.

Racist and a thief. Wonder where she learned that :::::cough _____ cough:::::
We recently watched the Battle of the Sexes, the true story of that epic tennis match between Bobby Riggs and Billie Jean King back in the 1970s. The story also focused on King coming to accept the fact the she was a lesbian, and featured a storyline about Margaret Court, an Australian tennis player known more today for being an unrepentant homophobe.

Good film, but you know this isn’t about that it’s about a trio of Hot Men from the film, like …

Austin Stowell, top … I’m guessing, and featured here before, who played Billie Jean’s unsuspecting husband, Larry.

James Mackay, bottom right, who played Barry Court, husband of Margaret.
And Lewis Pullman, bottom left, who played Larry Riggs, son of Bobby.

Two interesting footnotes: Lewis is the son of actor Bill Pullman, who also played a role in the film, and, kudos to the real Larry King, who divorced Billie Jean when she came out. Larry King remarried and when he and his second wife had children, they named Billie Jean King as the godparent.

Love that … and the hot guys.

Wednesday, February 20, 2019

Architecture Wednesday: Tucson Mountain Lava House

When we talk about places we’d like to live and I mention the desert as being one of my choices, Carlos always gags. But there’s just something about the sparseness of the landscape, the broad vistas, the heat and, sometimes, the cold of a high desert locale.

Plus, deserts always seem to have the most stunning homes, like the Tucson Mountain Lava House in Tucson Mountains just above the Santa Cruz River.

With vast walls of glass, you can relax in the home and yet still take in the vast landscape, bedrock outcroppings, various types of towering cacti, and desert dwelling plants like palo verde, ocotillo, jojoba, and creosote.

It’s just peaceful.

Like most desert homes, this one was designed to be anchored into the natural terrain without interrupting it as much as possible. The house was sited between weaving natural water sources and desert vegetation without drawing attention to human imprints on nature and yet it provides views of the Tucson Mountains on one side and the Santa Catalina Mountains on the other.

The house features several intentionally placed primary walls around which the rest of the house is built. These walls “anchor” the home to its natural slope and it’s around these walls that the public and private spaces are arranged.

In an attempt to control heat and maximize views, Lava House was built rather low, with long horizontal roof planes and several overhangs that provide shady havens throughout the property. But then there are other spaces where the low roofline allows winter sun to enter the house on shorter, darker days.

It’s made for living in intense heat and cool climates, but whatever time of year, it’s gorgeous.

Click to emBIGGERate ...

Eleven-Year-Old Arrested For Not Standing During Pledge of Allegiance

An eleven-year-old boy at Lawton Chiles Middle Academy in Lakeland, Florida was arrested this because he refused to recite the Pledge of Allegiance.

Oh, yes, he was. There was apparently some sort of back-and-forth between the child and teacher, a substitute teacher, but most of what we know is from the report the teacher gave, not from the boy,

That day, when the boy was told to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance, he told the teacher that the flag is racist against black people, and she replied:
“Why if it was so  bad here he did not go to another place to live.”
America; love it or leave it. And apparently she knew the child was not from "here" because he was a “different” color so clearly he’s not one of “us”? But the young man wasn’t playing, and simply told his teacher he couldn’t go back where he came from because:
“They brought me here.”
And the teacher, an immigrant from another country, told the student:
“Well you can always go back, because I came here from Cuba and the day I feel I’m not welcome here anymore I would find another place to live.”
And then she called the principal's office because she “did not want to continue dealing with him.”

Dealing with him? It seems he dealt with you, because I wonder how this teacher from Cuba would feelif, as we’ve seen time and again, a white person told her to go home?

But then came the arrest. A school resource officer said the student threatened to beat the teacher , wouldn’t follow directions, and said the principal should be fired. The young man says he never threatened anyone, but still an 11-year-old child was arrested and charged with resisting arrest without violence and disrupting a school function; he was taken to a juvenile detention center.

For not standing.

And he had every right not to stand. A public relations specialist representing the Polk County Public Schools clarified that students may choose not to recite the Pledge of Allegiance but that the substitute teacher did not know this. But why not check with anyone else at the school, including the principal, before arresting a child? And after arresting the child the school released a statement saying the teacher was unaware of their policy, but that she “will no longer be allowed to substitute at any of our schools.“

But the child was arrested. In America, for taking a stand by not standing, and being allowed by their school to take that stand.

Monday, February 18, 2019

Kansas GOP Steps Backwards Into Hate

We knew it wasn’t over, so this really isn’t that much of a surprise, but the level of childishness and stupidity is boundless.

Out in Kansas, lawmakers of the Republican variety  are backing a bill that labels same-sex marriages “parody marriages” and seeks to stop the state from recognizing them, while another bill would create an “elevated marriage” status for straight couples and make divorce more difficult.

Yes, straight marriages are waaaay up there, while same-sex marriages are a joke.

Oddly enough, this renewed disapproval of same-sex marriages from some GOP lawmakers comes on the heels of Kansas voters electing the state’s first out gay lawmakers and just two weeks after the introduction of a bill that would prohibit discrimination against LGBT individuals statewide.

So, let me get this queer, the people of Kansas, for whom these Republicans work, voted in some gay congresspeople, and the state is working toward banning LGBTQ discrimination, but a handful of Republicans wanna take the state back a decade or so … or even further?

And before I get in any more of a snit, the good news is that Kansas has a Democrat, Laura Kelly, left, in the governor’s office and one of her first official acts after being elected by the people was to restore non-discrimination protections for LGBT state workers. So, it doesn’t seem likely that she’d sign any anti-LGBT marriage bills.

Still, the bills mark the reemergence of same-sex marriage as a political wedge issue by some in the Kansas Statehouse, like Congressman Randy Garber, middle, a Republican because, of course:
“Their marriage probably doesn’t affect me—their union or whatever you want to call it. But in my opinion, they’re trying to force their beliefs on society.”
Two of the most offensive and discriminatory words: their and they. Their marriage … they try to force their beliefs. And he doesn’t even notice how he says a same-sex marriage doesn’t affect him, but he still wants them stopped. That’s the basic stupidity of the GOP; this doesn’t affect them at all, but they don’t like it, so it has to end.

But then there’s Congresswoman Susan Ruiz, right, Democrat who is the first lesbian to serve openly in the Kansas Legislature:
“I am very disappointed. I see who the co-sponsors are and I sit with a couple of them in committee and I’m certainly going to talk to them about that and say, ‘hey, I don’t know if you know about it or not, but I’m not a myth… Am I a unicorn?’”
No, but you scare Republicans because they don’t want to focus on the real issues, and if they make same-sex marriage a wedge issue again maybe they won’t have to talk about guns and the environment and infrastructure and their racist president.

Again, this probably won’t happen in Kansas because cooler, smarter, more openminded heads, will prevail, but it is something to look out for, and to fight against. Our marriages are not jokes, and our marriages are not less than those of straight couples, and if the Kansas GOP wants to make marriage an issue, we’ll fight back.

I mean, we won once already, this second attack should be a cake walk.

The march goes on …

How To 'Spot The Gay' According to A 1980s CIA Memo

Back in the 1980s, a decade or more after Stonewall it appeared to LGBT activists that progress was finally being made in the push for our civil rights, with the Democratic Party becoming the first major political party to endorse am LGBT-rights platform.

But that same year, the CIA released a three-page memorandum on how to Spot The Gay during police investigations, perhaps for the purposes of blackmail. It’s pretty high-larious, as you might have guessed … so let’s look at some of it:
1. Know that it won’t be easy to Spot The Gay.
“One of the most common mistakes made by the average person is the conviction that he can recognize a homosexual on sight. This is similar to recognizing a communist.”

Clearly, this was in the years before the ‘I’m Not Gay But My Boyfriend Is’ t-shirts.

The memo adds, “Very few employees come to work wearing eye makeup or ‘My Sin.’”

Very few?
2. The Gay is a good worker.
“The homosexual subject is usually regarded as an above-average employee. His work habits are good, he is punctual, responsive to authority, cooperative, friendly, a credit to the organization.”

Uh oh. I’m gay. And, if at your job, some guy wins Employee of the Month more than once, he is probably “a gay.”
3. The Gay has a post office box.
“Our subject leads a Jekyll-Hyde existence, constantly cautious, constantly aware that his ‘Mr. Hyde’ will be exposed. He frequently uses a Post Office Box to receive mail from trusted friends.”

Mail from trusted friends? Howsabout porn and video and magazines and, um, accessories?
Clearly this means if a guy does not have a PO Box, he likes girls?
4. The Gay drives an Audi or a Volkswagen — but not often.
“His car (preferably foreign) is often reserved for weekends, rarely drives to the office.”

How the hell did we get to work? On Rainbow-farting unicorns?

Sidenote: my fist car was a Volkswagen, so maybe there’s something to this? Oh, and I lived close to my job so I often walked …. Oh god, I’m gay!
5. The Gay speaks a foreign gay language.
“He has his own language” which includes “pass words,” or “auditory signals with which to test a chance acquaintance.”

Huh … and what are some of those pass words?
I wonder if the CIA tried to get Alan Turing to crack that cose?
6. The Gay has a roommate.
“It is not uncommon for two homosexuals to live together and not engage in mutual sex activity.”

So, two Gays live together but they aren’t “doing it”? Clearly one of them is not gay then because two gay men will always have sex with one another, anywhere, anytime, ever and always.

Amirite, fellas?
7. The Gay is a great tenant.
“Landlords often encourage rentals to homosexuals since they are neat, generally quiet, interested in keeping their apartments in good condition, and dependable when it comes to finances.”

No wonder I have always gotten my full security deposit back … I’m gay!
8. The Gay is really smart …
“The homosexual is a complex, intelligent, interesting and mixed-up individual.”
Nothing more to add to this one.
9. … but The Gay is also a Hot Mess.
“In checks of credit and police records, particular attention should be given to any arrests for disorderly conduct, disturbing the peace, or similar offenses.”

I’m neat, clean, tidy and respectful, but I don’t pay my bills and I’m prone to causing a scene.

It didn’t take long for the CIA’s antiquated views to get a judicial wake up call. In 1982 the agency fired a, a 9-year veteran employee after he openly admitted to identifying as gay. “John Doe” was represented by the ACLU, and after a 3-year legal battle, a federal judge ruled that the man must be rehired by the agency.

John Doe was able to blend in, had a PO Box, was a hard worker, drove a foreign car, had his own special language, had a roommate, was neat and tidy and polite, but forgot to pay his bills and maybe got a little drunk in public, and was smart enough to work at the CIA without them ever knowing it.