From the Are They Really Gonna Do This file ... while _____ was promoting a transgender military ban, his spokes-moron, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, decided to start off a White House press briefing by reading a letter from a constituent ... a 9-year-old boy named Dylan.
Sanders announced that she’d be reading letters at the start of some briefings “to remind us a little more often of some of the forgotten men, women, and children that we’re here to serve and that the president is fighting for.” Or, better said, because the Orange Man needs his tiny ego stroked ... or something.
Dylan, who also goes by the name “Pickle,” wrote:
“My name is Dylan, but everybody calls me Pickle. I’m nine years old and you’re my favorite president.”
And we’ll stop ... “favorite”? Or is that just because Mommy and Daddy said so, because it gets ickier now ...
“I like you so much that I had a birthday party about you.”
Stopping. A _____ Child’s Birthday Party? Did they play Bankruptcy? Did they play Pin The Hand on the Pussy? Liar Liar?
“My cake was the shape of your hat.”
Not his tiny hands. But then Dylan asked how old Trump was—because he acts like a child?—and how big the White house was ... which caused Sanders, during a press briefing, to rattle off a long list of facts about the property. Dylan goes on:
“I don’t know why people don’t like you.”
Um, Dylan, may I? It’s because he’s unhinged—that means insane; it’s because he’s a racist, misogynist, anti-immigrant, anti-Muslim, anti-LGBTQ moron with no experience running a country ... unless it’s into the ground.
I know you’re nine, Dylan, but grow up, fast, because by the time you get to vote, if people like your parents have their way, this country will be a shit-show. M’kay?
Oh, and after reading Pickles’ letter, Sanders threatened to end the briefing early if reporters asked about ____ banning transgender people from the military.
Yup, a letter from a kid and no discussion of the president’s bigotry and hatred.
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