Meme Dump

Death, Wills, Snow Days, Eggs

Well after the threat of snow and ice last weekend, which never materialized, the snow came this past weekend and made everything pretty for a couple of days. It was quiet and peaceful and c-c-c-cold way to spend the weekend and, of course, our trip to Asheville was cancelled—which I will reschedule in April for Carlos’ birthday—but it was nice.

We ran errands on Friday … we stopped by the attorney to have our wills updated which is never a fun thing to do, but its necessary.

After that we went to talk to a flooring person about changing out the floors. It’s part of the same company that built out cabinets so we stopped over at their offices and found a sign on the door. They are planning a move to a larger space so I thought that was what the sign said, but instead it said the man, Larry,  we were coming to see had suddenly passed away and the offices were closed for several days. Really shocking as we had seen him just last month at the Camden Christmas Parade and he seemed fine. We called our contractor and he said Larry had a massive heart attack last week and passed quickly.

It can all go so fast.

Switching gears … we decided to do our grocery shopping since the snow was coming Saturday and, of course, so did everyone else. Luckily, we weren’t stocking up on all the bread and milk and canned soup so those aisles were relatively calm. Then came the egg aisle and the crowd of people grabbing at the eggs. I stood back and waited until the herd thinned and noticed a woman watching a man check each and every cartoon of eggs before choosing one; finally he was done and she reached in, plucked a carton and off she went. I did the same and then Carlos and I  headed off to checkout where that same woman got in line behind me and so I said:

“I saw you watching all those vultures at the egg case and loved how you just reached in, grabbed a carton and left.”

“Honey, I’m from New York. I am not playing.”

“I’m not from New York and I’m not playing either.”

Kindred spirits.

The Girls, Rosita and Consuelo, had zero desire to step outside in the snowfall so I found an old photo of Tuxedo with snow on his head, ... doesn’t he look happy … and one of Ozzo the Pocket Dog nesting in the snow ...

And now a little Casa Bob y Carlos looking quite peaceful and lovely yesterday…

Up the driveway …

The roads were covered and quiet …

The house through the trees …

Down the driveway …

Into the backyard …

And finally the shed which I am trying to turn into a music room so Carlos can practice his trumpet at least 75 feet away from me ... I kid, or do I …

After breakfast Carlos went out into the yard and came back in and said it was nice outside. I reminded him that, yes, the sun was out and it felt warm, but it was 19-degrees which is roughly 11-degrees lower than his What The Fuck threshold.

So yesterday was peaceful and sunny and snowy, and we had a delicious Ham and White Bean soup with crusty bread, but today is back at work, then a day off, then two days working, then my usual three-day weekend.

It’s a cycle. 

Why Is It ...

… that I get no credit whatsoever for helping people deal with a trying time. I mean, instead of saying “Fuck off,” I always ask, “How can I help you fuck off?”

… that people don’t understand that Facebook is just a tool for me to be a menace to society

… that people always come up to me with their feel good granola kumbaya motivational crap but when I say to them, “Reach for the stars because even if you miss you’ll be miles away from me,” they call me mean.

… that people don’t see that while I am a red flag the material is quality

... that whenever I go to a shop selling essential oils and ask for the one that calms people down, they me offer lilac or some shiz and not the Chloroform I asked for

… that anyone who has distanced themselves from me, I kindly say, ‘Stay there, and Thank you.’

… that I know I don’t have to be so sarcastic but the world has given me so much to work and I would hate to be wasteful.

… that one of my toxic traits is saying “Nice talk” after saying something and it gets ignored.

… that when a co-worker asked why I was so irritated since I’d just clocked in, I said, ‘It’s spillover from yesterday. MOVE!’

… that when I first meet people I’m very shy, then boom! I’m a whole podcast with no mute button or Off switch.

Bobservations

First off, thanks everyone for the birthday wishes. Tuesday was the day of my birth, but the celebration is a weeklong event. Carlos gifted me a day to myself on Tuesday as he had a conference to attend in Columbia and we will celebrate with a meal at one of our favorite restaurants in Asheville this weekend IF it doesn’t snow as predicted; in that case we’ll dine closer to home … 

So this past weekend we waited for The Storm. They said snow on Saturday with sub-freezing temperatures and then an ice storm on Sunday taking out trees and knocking out power.

Yeah; not so much. We got about an inch of snow that was gone before noon and then ice storm apparently melted before it arrived but …

On Sunday it was quite cold and Carlos decided to practice his trumpet in the sunroom with two of the four sliders open to the 20-degree air.

This from the man who drops an F-bomb every morning that the temperature is 35-degrees or less.

This from the man who sleeps under five blankets while wearing three pairs of socks, long underwear, sweatpants and a sweater.

But standing in a 20-degree sunroom? Now it was my turn for the F-bombs!

This Tuxedo Says is from August 2021 ...

Tuxedo watches a lot of CNN—like his daddy he has a wee crush on Anderson Cooper, whom he calls his Owner-In-My-Head … where does he come up with these things—and is amazed at the way Republicans think …or don’t actually think.

While we must remember Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti, ICE agents have also been responsible for the deaths of seven people of color since the first on the year.

Top Row, left to right:

Keith Porter Jr. was fatally shot by an off-duty ICE agent on New Year’s Eve outside his apartment complex. An LAPD spokesperson said Porter had fired gunshots into the air and a DHS spokesperson said the off-duty ICEstapo officer was “forced to defensively use his weapon” but offers no evidence to support that.

Parady La, Cambodian refugee, died while being held in ICEstapo custody at the Federal Detention Center in Philadelphia. He passed away after suffering severe drug withdrawal, with his family alleging medical neglect. 

Heber Sanchez Domínguez, a Mexican citizen, died while in ICEstapo custody at the Robert A. Deyton Detention Center in Georgia. The cause of death is currently under investigation. 

Victor Manuel Diaz, from Nicaragua, died in ICEstapo custody at Camp East Montana in El Paso, Texas. DHS says Diaz died of a presumed suicide but  the official cause of his death remains under investigation.

Bottom Row, left to right:

Luis Beltran Yanez-Cruz, from Honduras, died while under the custody of the ICEstapo after suffering a heart-related medical issue; his death is also under investigation.

Luis Gustavo Nunez Caceres, a Honduran citizen, died in ICEstapo custody in Texas of “complications related to congenital heart failure.”

Geraldo Lunas Campos, from Cuba,  died in custody at the ICEstapo detention center in Camp East Montana; the cause of death was "asphyxia due to neck and torso compression."

Last year, 32 people died in ICE custody, the most in a single year since the agency was created. 

Add their names to your rage.

Ticket sales for Amazon’s $40,000,000 documentary about the Slovenian Hooker’s return to the White have been, well, much like her husband’s penis, little and soft. According to one of Britain’s biggest cinema operators, Tim Richards, chief executive of Vue, just two tickets have been booked for the 6pm showing at Vue Islington on its opening evening.

Perhaps if Melanie had included her soft-core porn film as part of the documentary she might have sold three tickets.

The “No Kings” protests against the regime are returning March 28, this time with a flagship event in the Minneapolis on the heels of the ICEstapo murders on Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti.

Other demonstrations are expected again across the country.

Stand up; speak up; resist!

Thanks to Doc Heroin Addict the measles epidemic in South Carolina has spread to at least 789 people, surpassing the 2025 West Texas outbreak that sickened 762 people and killed two young girls. The majority of cases remain centered in Spartanburg County, mostly among people who were either unvaccinated or didn’t know their status.

South Carolina has long strived to be the best at something but who would have guessed it would be measles?

Good, fun news, because it has MAGAts in a giant snit, a rumor has it that Bad Bunny will wear a dress during his upcoming Super Bowl performance. And MAGAts are already ranting and raging all over X even though the story has not been substantiated.

Either way, I like the white, but the pink looks more fun, don’t you think?

Jhona Burjack is a model represented by agencies in New York, Los Angeles, Sydney, Hamburg, and São Paulo. It’s like he’s everywhere so … Would You Hit It?

Why Is It ...

… that I always regret making a good first impression because there is no way I can keep that shiz up.

… that I don’t make the same mistake twice but I can make it 5 or 6 or 40 times just to be sure.

… that I remember the time when I thought a new hip joint meant someplace I wanted to go on a Friday night.

… that people don’t understand that I find out about everything … I even know Victoria’s Secret.

... that when my boss asked why I was late I said, “I cut someone off and they told me to go to Hell. At first I couldn’t find it, but now I’m here.’

… that even though some things are better left unsaid, I have a habit of saying them

…. that I will burn bridges while I’m still standing on them just so people know I am serious about my crazy.

… that I don’t mind coming in to work but waiting eight hours to go home is bull shiz

… that I bought a co-worker a Get Better Soon card and she didn’t like it. I mean, she’s not sick, I just think she could do better.

… that there are many times I am in mid-conversation with someone and will say, “Look, I don’t care.”

… when I shut down, I shut down for real … like McDonalds ice cream machine real.

Bobservations

According to our local weather folks, we are expecting snowstorms, ice storms, rains storms, hailstorms, tornadoes, hurricanes, locusts, frogs falling from the heavens and so much worse by the time Monday rolls around.

I can handle all of that, but what I cannot handle is Carlos’ sudden need to change the temperature from Fahrenheit to Celsius. This morning it was 28-degrees and after he heard that and muttered his standard cold morning “Oh fuck,” he said:

“It’s -2 degrees!”

“No, it’s 28—”

“In Celsius it’s -2!”

“We don’t use Celsius so stop staying that.”

Whispering as he wanders into the bathroom …

“Minus 2, minus 2, minus 2.”

I am gonna lower the temperature of the extra freezer and let Carlos nap in there all weekend and then see him mutter Celsius!

This Tuxedo Says is from August 2021 ...

Is anyone really surprised that after living with me for seventeen years Tuxedo is a liberal?

This week Virginia inaugurated Abigail Spanberger as its first female Governor, and since Blue now controls the state, this was done on Day One:

They have ended police cooperation with Cankles’ ICEstapo.

They passed new laws to combat Cankles’ gerrymandering and eliminated 4 House GOP seats.

They enshrined LGBTQ+ rights and abortion rights into the state’s Constitution.

They protected and expanded voting rights.

They fired GOP appointees to the UVA board.

They reestablished support for Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion [DEI].

They accelerated their minimum wage increase.

They voted to build more housing to lower rents.

This is Blue and the Resistance at work and if it sounds good to you, the Vote Blue.

Can someone explain to me why the GOP and Cankles’ Fascist Regime say there is no money for healthcare but loads of cash to buy a foreign country??

Can someone also explain to me why, all of the sudden, there are no more “drug boats” in the Caribbean carrying fentanyl into the US?

And while we’re at it, can someone explain to María Corina Machado that giving away her Nobel Peace to the guy who bombed your country because he wants the oil, and then tried to make himself leader of her country, means she didn’t deserve the prize in the first place?

I love language and always like to use words that may have gone out of fashion, or are from a bygone era, just to keep them alive if only in my brain . But every once in a while I need a new word to add to my vocabulary and this weeks it’s:

Bitchuation

Any situation that forces me to act like a bitch.

And speaking of bitches, Nicki Minaj, who has the IQ of a puppet, went off on Don Lemon and the LGBTQ+ community because Lemon covered the anti-ICEstapo protest at a Minneapolis church over the weekend, saying:

“DON COCK SUCKIN’ LEMON IS DISGUSTING. HOW DARE YOU? I WANT THAT THUG IN JAIL!!!!! HE WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO ANY OTHER RELIGION. LOCK HIM UP.”

First off, dumbass, enough with the Caps Lock. Secondly, get an education before you speak. He didn’t attack a religion, he reported on a pro-ICE minister and you responded with homophobic slurs like an illiterate pig might do. And when Lemon came for Minaj, she doubled-down against the entire LGBTQ+ community:

“LOL!!! And I purposely wrote it that way b/c I knew that would be the only way to get the cock suckers to post about it. They would have all collectively ignored the despicable behavior displayed by Lemon head. I’m glad they’re angry. They’re about to get angrier.”

Oh Nicki, from the LGBTQ+ community: Fuck ALL the way off.

Red baseball caps spoofing those MAGAt hats have become a symbol of Danish and Greenlandic defiance against Cankles threat to seize the frozen territory but they don’t say Make America Great Again, but instead beg Make America Go Away.

My, how far we’ve fallen in the world view since a racist rapist pedophile traitor and con artist took control.

Mitchell Saron is an American fencer who represented America at the 2024 Summer Olympics in Paris with his big saber so … Would You Hit It?

Meme Dump