Some Thoughts On Tony

Loyal ISBL readers know that I am a proud Awards Show Whore®. I watch them all, from Emmy to Tony to Oscar and Grammy; hell, I even watch the Daytime Emmys. If the television industry wants me to watch, put the word "awards" the title and I'll be glued to my set.

The Scandal Awards. 

The Modern Family Awards. 

The Project Runway: Awards.

The FoxNews Awards....okay, so it doesn't work all the time. Still, I'll be there.

And last night was the gayest awards show of all, The Tony Awards; and I don’t call it gay just because it’s Broadway, but because it’s one of the few, maybe the only, awards show where the winners who just happen to be gay actually kiss their partners/spouses/lovers on the way up to the stage and then thank them in a lovely speech.

So, let’s rip …. with random thoughts ...

Hugh Jackman and his Huge Ackman, Seriously, is there anything this man cannot do? His hopping opening had me tired before he even got into the building and then he sings and dances and taps and, yeah, raps, and tells jokes, and, well, is just beautiful to look at, though I could do without the beard. No shade on the gay rumors, I meant the actual facial hair. I like my Hugh clean shaven.

Patti LaBelle and Gladys Knight showed all those younger divas how it’s done, and done right.

Les Miserables was up for Best Revival; I didn’t know it had ever gone away …

James Monroe Iglehart brought the house down in a  number from Aladdin — right before he won a Tony for the role — but I was kinda busy looking at Adam Jacobs’, as Aladdin, abs.

Clint Eastwood. Why? Broadway and Eastwood? Plus, man did he seem old and disoriented.

Fran Drescher? Seriously. Oh, she was on Broadway, signing, no less, this Spring in Cinderella. No, she’s the evil stepmother.

Jonathan Groff — cute and gay — steps out to introduce Idina Menzel singing a song from her Tony-nominated role in If/Then and does the perfect impression of Travolta at the Oscars with “the wickedly talented” Idina Menzel; yes, he got the name right.

Sting — a favorite of mine ... a friend and I once saw him in concert seven times in eight days at six different venues — was on to present a song from his upcoming musical he wrote, The Last Ship. I.Love.Sting. I did not like this song. I mean, if you want me to come see this thing, don’t give sad and drab musical numbers, give me something to excite me.

Like … say … Alan Cumming reprising his role as the Emcee in the remounting of the revival of the original musical Cabaret. I remember when he first appeared on Broadway in that role back in 1998 and it seemed kind of risqué and shocking. Times have changed and now it seems, well, still sexy, but kind of quaint.

I have a wee crush on Mister Cumming because he's openly gay, a happily married man and has the most delicious Scottish accent ... and I am a sucker for a man with an accent.

The scene they chose to use from Rocky: The Musical might have been better if it featured an actual song? Just sayin’. But ... a New Hottie Alert goes out to Andy Karl, who stars in Rocky; The Musical. He's like a younger, more smoldering Dylan McDermott.

Kenneth Branagh, unlike Hugh Jackman, was hotter with his beard, and again, facial hair, people.

Patricia Clarkson presented with Bradley Cooper and Alessandro Nivola, and I kept thinking I’d like to be the meat in the sandwich … minus Clarkson, though.

Now, i have nothing against Miss Clarkson, in fact, she's one of my favorite actresses — see Far from Home  — but, c'mon, she is kinda the odd, er, man out in that threesome, you know.

RuPaul came out in male drag to introduce NPH performing from Hedwig and the Angry Inch. I don’t think it was lost on anyone who’s been paying attention to TrannyGate that he used the word transgender last night. That said, NPH was fantastic as Hedwig; tour de force performance. Fun and edgy; and the kiss he laid on his husband, David Burtka, was hot. Plus, later on NPH won as best Actor in a Musical, so it was tres gay!

My Hot Gay Alert Alarm sounded when Matt Bomer and Zachary Quinto appeared together looking all cute and sexy and gay.

It was almost like a dream I once had where Matt, Zach and I … we … um … yeah .. I think it best if I just leave it at that, and then hope I get that dream again.

Audra McDonald — one of my all-time favorite singers and actresses — won a history making sixth Tony Award for her portrayal of one of mu other favorite singers, Billie Holiday, in Lady Day at Emerson’s Bar & Grill. 

She is truly an amazingly talented singer and actress.

And Jennifer Hudson sang a song from an upcoming musical Finding Neverland. I don’t know if JHud is going to be in it, but someone needs to get that girl in a Broadway musical and fast. That is a show-stopping voice if there ever was one and Broadway could use her.

And there you have it, the high points, at least in my shallow Broadway-loving, show-tune-singing, Huge-Ackman-craving mind. It was very gay, and very gay, and fabulous and fun and entertaining. Hugh was fantastic; not as wild and crazy and madcap as NPH, but, man, singing, dancing, joking, and looking hot? He's the total package with a total package. As Ethel Merman might have sung, had she seen him:

♪ ♫ Who could ask for anything more! ♪ ♫

Best Musical "A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder"

Best Revival of a Musical "Hedwig and the Angry Inch"

Leading Actor in a Musical Neil Patrick Harris, "Hedwig and the Angry Inch"

Leading Actress in a Musical Jesse Mueller, "Beautiful -- The Carole King Musical"

Best Featured Actress in a Musical Lena Hall, "Hedwig and the Angry Inch"

Best Featured Actor in a Musical James M. Iglehart, "Aladdin"

Best Direction of a Musical Darko Tresnjak, "A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder"

Best Play "All the Way"

Best Revival of a Play "A Raisin in the Sun"

Leading Actress in a Play Audra McDonald, "Lady Day at Emerson's Bar & Grill"

Leading Actor in a Play Bryan Cranston, "All the Way"

Best Featured Actor in a Play Mark Rylance, "Twelfth Night"

Best Featured Actress in a Play Sophie Okonedo, "A Raisin in the Sun"

Best Direction of a Play Kenny Leon, "A Raisin in the Sun"

My Ten Favorite Christmas Tunes: Sting "Soul Cake"

A Very Sting Christmas

Musical Interlude: Sting

One of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard.
"They Dance Alone (Cueca Solo)" is actually a protest song written by Sting that refers to Chilean women, mourning the "disappearances" of their loved ones, their sons, fathers, husbands, brothers.
The women would take to the streets, to dance the Cueca, the national dance of Chile, while holding photographs of their disappeared loved ones in their hands or pinned to their skirts. 
This song as a symbolic gesture of protest against the Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet whose regime killed thousands of people between 1973 and 1990. 
At an Amnesty International concert I attended in Los Angeles, while Sting sang this song, nearly 50 Chilean women came onstage with photos of their lost husbands and sons in their hands or pinned in their clothing, and they danced alone.

The Police: Synchronicity II

This is the song that was in my head when I woke up.

Just sayin'.

I Ain't One To Gossip, But......

ESPN's Pardon the Interruption co-host, and clueless moron, Tony Kornheiser made some rather downright insulting comments regarding SportsCenter anchor Hannah Storm and her wardrobe.
On.The.Air.
"She was wearing a horrifying, horrifying outfit today. She's got on red go-go boots and a Catholic school plaid skirt … way too short for somebody in her 40s or maybe early 50s by now. She's got on her typically very, very tight shirt. She looks like she has sausage casing wrapping around her upper body … I know she's very good, and I'm not supposed to be critical of ESPN people, so I won't … but Hannah Storm … come on now! Stop! What are you doing?"
So, the "sports" guy morphed into Mister Blackwell, and took his comments to the airwaves. And, as is par for the course in these cases where people open their yaps before thinking, Kornheiser apologized for his insulting comments:
"I was wrong. This is sort of what I do, and I'm sorry for it. … Not the first time and won't be the last time, but I apologize for it this time."
His backhanded apology wasn't good enough for ESPN and they suspended him indefinitely.
Good for ESPN.

Sting released a new CD this past year, but he really hasn't toured much since The Police Reunion Tour of 2008.

Now, however, he is planning a world tour this summer, playing all of his music, reworked for the Royal Philharmonic Concert Orchestra. The tour begins June 2nd in North America, and a UK leg is set to follow.

In a statement, Sting said:"I'm delighted by this new opportunity to tour with the Royal Philharmonic Concert Orchestra and reinterpret the songs I've been playing for many years."

I will be looking for, and hoping, that the tour comes somewhere near Smallville, even in a neighboring state. I am a huge fan of his music, and, well, in the interests of open dialogue, I once stalked Sting up and down the West Coast, seeing him in concert eight times in nine days, everywhere from Los Angeles to Seattle.

Don't judge.

After saying he wouldn't, because he doesn't have any sort of substance abuse issues ::::any more:::: Charlie Sheen has checked himself into rehab for alcohol and cocaine.

But, not, however, the same rehab facility where his current wife, Brooke Mueller, is seeking treatment for her crack habit. This is ::::allegedly:::: Brook's first trip through rehab, and Charlie's third.

People close to him, say he's seeking help because: “He loves his children and ultimately that’s what convinced him to get help.”

Hmm, love your children, but cannot give up the coke'n'booze; and then mom has her own crack troubles. Lovely set of parents for those children.

Charlie, while in rehab, is apparently trying to re-negotiate his contract with his mindnumbingly dumb TV show Two and a Half Men, because, well, rehab, and maybe another divorce, cost money.

In a case of crazy meets crazy, Paula Abdul will film a pilot for Oprah Winfrey's I-Have-More-Money-And-More-Cake-Than-God-Network, I mean, OWN.

Paula would be doing a daily talk show--who told Paula she could talk--in the vein of the old Oprah show, with celebrity guests and inspirational tales.

Seriously, this is the craziest thing ever.

Paula hasn't strung a coherent sentence together since 1984, and Oprah thinks she can have a talk show?

People wonder, though, if Paula's talk show--I laugh just typing it--takes off, will she still do the American X-Factor show with Simon Cowell, and Paula answers, "If Ellen DeGeneres can do it…so can I!"

Honey? You're no Ellen.

You're Paula Crazy Abdul.

I smell a trainwreck.

Evgeni Plushenko is a sore loser. An asshat of epic proportions.

Since losing the Gold medal at the Vancouver Olympics to American Evan Lysacek, Evgeni Plushenko has gone on a tear about how he was robbed and he's the better skater and he does a quad and ::::blibbety blah blay blue:::: get over it.

Now, it seems that Evgeni and his webmasters have created a website where he declares that he won, and this is so funny it's stupid, the ::::ooooooh aaaaaaah:::: Platinum Medal.

Do you see what he's doing there? Platinum is much more precious than either Silver or Gold, so he's rewriting Olympic history to say that was the winner, going so far as to create a medal category that doesn't exist.

Poor Evgeni Plushenko.

You can change the name, dear, but you're still a big pile of Number Two.

Lorenzo Lamas, hasbeen TV actor from the early 1980s, is apparently taking a page out of Charlie Sheen's book. Not the cocaine and booze page, but the serial groom page.

Seems, La Lamas, fifty-two years, um, young, is getting married again, for the fifth time, to his 23 year-old girlfriend of three months, Shawna Craig.

Good thing The Gays can't marry and the Straights can do it again and again and again and again and again.

I bet they have loads in common. For instance, she probably went to high school with a few of his six children. And, though she wasn't born yet, she can catch up with Lorenzo from his days on Falcon Crest in the 80s.

Good luck to these two crazy kids!

Tiger Woods is pissed at PETA.Not because he's a fur-wearing starlet, but because of a proposed billboard PETA wants to us.

It's clever, but Tiger ain't laughing. His lawyers, already working overtime on other issues, have contacted PETA and the animal rights group seems to be backing up:

"In light of conversations we have had with Mr. Woods' attorneys, plans to run our billboard are on hold at this time."

I think it's funny.

I Saw Three Ships

Sting

Happy Thanksgiving

Idina Menzel: "Defying Gravity" from Wicked

Sting "Fragile"

Crowded House "Distant Sun"

Linda Ronstadt "Someone To Watch Over Me"