I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Oh Jussie. Former Empire actor, and Gay Boy Who Cried Wolf,  Jussie Smollett ALLEGEDLY had a sexual relationship with one of his ALLEGED ‘attackers,’ Ambimbola ‘Abel’ Osundairo.

Apparently, the couple, before Abel ‘bashed’ Jussie for some of his Empire coins, used to party together and go to a Chicago bathhouse to, um, well, bathe?

Oh Jussie, you don’t hire your sidepiece to ALLEGEDLY beat you up for sympathy press and a bigger contract for a TV show. Everybody knows that.

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This doesn’t look odd at all … Bruce Willis is self-isolating with ex-wife Demi Moore, and his three oldest children and their boyfriends and Demi’s assistant rather than self-isolate with his current wife, Emma Hemming, and their two young children. A source—Demi, no doubt because, seriously, what else does she have to do—says:

“Demi and Emma are close, and all three get on great as a big blended family. There are no issues at all. Emma needed to stay in L.A. with the young kids.”

Emma had to stay in LA while Bruce chose to stay with Demi? Uh huh; look, maybe it is all kumbaya in the Willis-Moore-Hemming household, but still  Bruce chose to self-isolate with his grown kids and not his younger ones?

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Some JLo juice? Okay … for whatever reason, Jose Canseco is still trying to convince the world that Alex Rodriquez is a cheating on JLo.

It all began last year, when Jose was watching World of Dance and Lopez, who at the time was newly engaged to A-Rod, and this annoyed Jose who claimed A-Rod was having an affair with his ex-wife Jessica Canseco—which Jessica has denied. Sadly, no one cared about Jose’s claims, but that hasn’t stopped him.

So, since no one cares—and let’s be clear, this will be another notch on JLo’s headboard and she be divorced from A-rod … if they ever marry … quicker than you can say How many times have you been married?—Canseco took to Twitter to wish:

“Happy Easter to everyone except Alex Rodriguez.”

Ooooh, burn. I love grown-assed men acting like thirteen-year-old girls. But then Jose followed that up with a message directed at JLo herself:

“Jennifer Lopez I have something to show you for your eyes only you will not regret it please contact Morgan at 702 374 3735”

Okay, first things first, who the fuck is Morgan? And how many Twit-heads tried calling him or her? And lastly, what the fuck is wrong with Jose Canseco? Did the steroids cause him to turn into a mean girl?

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It looks like one Anna Wintour won’t make Ricky Gervais’ Naughty List because Anna wants y’all to know that she has taken a pay cut during the pandemic.

Conde Nast, publisher of numerous magazines including Vogue, decided to tackle the COVID-19 situation with pay cuts and reduced work hours. CEO Roger Lynch is taking a 50% pay cut in an attempt to keep the company afloat, and a “temporary” pay cut will affect 10 to 20 percent of employees, but only those making $100,000 a year or more. It will go into effect May 1st.

Wintour—who ALLEGEDLY rakes in about $2 million a year—and I thought it’d be more—is included in the temporary pay cut group and will see her salary will be decreased by 20%.

Yes, people, Anna will have to make do on $1.6 million. I am starting a GoFundMe at once.

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Blac Chyna. Gurl. Did you learn nothing from Tori Spelling trying to use the pandemic to make people pay her to be on social media with them? Or, are you just that stupid?

Rhetorical question. You see, Chyna is selling FaceTime calls for $950 and social media follow backs for $250.

I wouldn’t pay this talentless miscreant social media whore 2 bucks to follow me home with my groceries, but it is funny to think that Chyna thinks she’s worth $950 on social media and Tori wanted just $95.

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After learning how hard Sam Smith has it in their London mansion, or how Justin Timberlake is struggling to raise ONE kid in the middle of a gated luxury community in Montana, or how Ellen feels like she’s living Orange Is The New Black But This Time In A Montecito Mansion … now we have Justin Bieber, and his streetwear model  wife, Hailey Baldwin, along with their BFF, Kendall Jenner, in an Instagram livestream talking about how important it is to acknowledge their privilege during these trying times.

Hailey hovers in the background making duck faces while Justin lets everyone know how blessed and rich they are, and they shouldn’t feel bad for it since they “worked” hard for it. Yes, while millions are out of work, and millions more have no healthcare, and thousands upon thousands are dying each and every day,  Justin and Hailey sit in their mansion and spew shiz like:

“How blessed are we to be able to like… a lot of people obviously in this time have a crappy situation. You know, they look at us and obviously, we’ve worked hard for where we’re at, so it’s like, you can’t feel bad for the things we have.”

At which point Kendall chimes in:

“[We’re] so blessed. I think about it all the time.”

Cut to the chase: this is what celebrities look and sound like when they get no attention. And to sit in your mansion and talk about how lucky you are because you worked so hard seems to imply that anyone without a mansion and servants and privilege doesn’t work hard at all.

The greatest payback would be for people to remember how these asshats acted, and when all this is over, stop buying their idiotic music or watching their stupid shows or, and this will kill these media whores, stop following and liking and sharing.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Just an example of how overboard people go with social media … it seems 90210 star Jennie Garth is getting the shiz from people on social media for not posting photos and memories of Luke Perry following his death.

And even though her Instagram page was silent following Perry’s passing—she did release a statement to the press—sad fans waited for some crumbs. And her next post didn’t stop the haters; see, her first post after Perry’s death was a photo of her three daughters for International Women’s Day and that was too much for those so-called fans. They jumped in and Jennie clapped back:

“Hey everyone … I chose to post a pic of my girls today. Because they are my life. Because today is a day to celebrate all women. It took a lot for me to want to celebrate anything. I thought about it and I know that’s the way my dear friend would have wanted it. His kids were his life. And anyone who knew him knows that and knows he didn’t give a fuck about social media. So please don’t assume or judge or make rude comments.”

Snap. Why don’t we let people mourn the way they choose to mourn, m’kay?

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Well, Kathy Griffin is still riding the Woe Is Me train following that nearly two-year-old photo of her with the bloody fake _____ head. And she’s still trying to drag My Husband In My Head, Anderson Cooper, for saying the picture was tasteless.

In a new interview, she talked AC again

“I was devastated. It still hurts. I mean, I really loved him.”

Um, Kathy, you unfunny asshat; if you loved Anderson you’d know he was giving his opinion, which you didn’t like, about an opinion you gave, which a lot of people didn’t like.

Grow up, move the fuck on, and become funny again.

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Even billionaires are asshats and whiny little narcissistic bitches, and, no, I don’t mean _____ … cuz he ain’t no billionaire. This is about billionaire developer Harry Macklowe who splattered a picture of him with his eons younger fiancé on a Park Avenue building that his ex-wife of 58 years was moving into.

Harry and Linda Macklowe didn’t have a prenup, so they fought over their East Hamptons home, their $700 million art collection, and two adjoining apartments at 432 Park Ave … the building that Harry and new wife Patricia’s humongous faces currently terrorize. Both Harry and Linda wanted to live in the building but Linda won out and so Harry is acting like a dick.

And it might also be because Linda walked away with half of Harry’s $2 billion fortune.

I wonder how much that big picture cost him.

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It’s funny, and sad, when people dredge up a nearly thirty-year-old feud to make themselves newsworthy, but that exactly what Peter Bogdanovich is doing by claiming that he and he only is responsible for Cher’s noteworthy role in Mask.

Yes, he came for Cher, bitches. When asked in an interview who was the most difficult actor he’s ever worked with, Peter said:

“Well, she didn’t trust anybody, particularly men. She doesn’t like men. That’s why she’s named Cher: She dropped her father’s name. Sarkisian, it is. She can’t act. She won Best Actress at Cannes because I shot her very well. And she can’t sustain a scene. She couldn’t do what Tatum [O’Neal] did in Paper Moon. She’d start off in the right direction, but she’d go off wrong somehow, very quickly. So I shot a lot of close-ups of her because she’s very good in close-ups.”

Damn, Pete! Why so angry? Oh … maybe because, why he also says he and Cher ended up getting along quite well making the movie, afterwards when he sued the studio for replacing his preferred Bruce Springsteen song at the end with one by Bob Seger, Cher sided against him.

So, he’s a tiny man with a big ego. Got it.

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A-Rod proposed to JLo so these two kids with some five marriages, and many more engagements, between them are taking quite the risk. But has it already soured?

It seems that back in the day, A-Rod had an affair with Jessica Canseco, ex-wife of Jose Canseco, and now Jose is claiming it’s on again. In fact, he Tweeted about it:

“Watching World of Dance watching JLo text Alex Rodriguez little does she know that he is cheating on her with my ex-wife Jessica poor girl she has no idea who he really is”

And this:

“I was there a few months back with her when he called her on her phone”

Then this one:

“Alex Rodriguez stop being a piece of shit stop cheating on Jennifer Lopez”

And then Jose went all kinds of crazy:

“Alex Rodriguez I challenge you to a boxing match or an MMA match anytime you want. I am willing to take a polygraph to prove that what I'm saying about Alex Rodriguez is 100% accurate”

Canseco had me, because I can see A-Rod being a cheater, right up until the boxing challenge. Now it seems it’s all about Jose being thirsty for press … and maybe a shot with his ex-wife?

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College admissions scam artist, and now out-of-work actress, Lori Loughlin was allowed to keep her passport when she turned herself into the FBI and was charged with bribing officials to get her two moronic daughters into USC.

Lori kept her passport because she had work commitments in Vancouver filming Hallmark movies and her Hallmark series, When Calls the Heart. She told the court that she had filming commitments throughout the rest of the year.

Yeah, not so fast criminal … the Hallmark Channel has issued a hard pass response that Lori Loughlin has been dropped from all Hallmark Channel productions:

“We are saddened by the recent news surrounding the college admissions allegations. We are no longer working with Lori Loughlin and have stopped development of all productions that air on the Crown Media Family Network channels involving Lori Loughlin.”

Along with stopping all current projects, the network will no longer air any content featuring Loughlin.

Ouch; but wait … the producers of Fuller House say they have zero plans to bring her back for the next season.

If only her kids could get a Grade A education and then get jobs to support their mother, but the rumor is out that USC is kicking both of her daughters to the curb.

Karma is a bitch, and right now I love her.

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Random Musings

So, we'll start off with some good news.

Last month we saw yet another case of an LGBTQ youth attempting suicide as a result of bullying when Austin Rodriguez tried to kill himself, but ended up, instead, in a coma. [original post HERE]

Now, Austin is off the ventilator; he's out of the coma. He's been awake for nearly a week. And he's been moved from the ICU and is in a private room in the hospital.

Austin took to Facebook, via his mother's account, to let people know he's doing better:

Hopefully this is a wake up call for Austin; for him to realize that suicide isn't an answer. And hopefully this will be a wake up call to parents and schools that bullying needs to stop.

Now.

Tony Perkins, Flying Monkey In Chief for the inappropriately named American Family Association, actually believe that the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell brought about the Secret Service Hooker Scandal.

That's quite a jump. Allowing gay men and women to serve openly in our military is the root cause of a bunch of Secret Service agents hiring Colombian hookers.

That Tony Perkins is just about the biggest idiot EVER!

Say it isn't so!

Maggie Smith reportedly wants out of Downton Abbey after next season, wishing to return to movies and the stage: "Maggie has asked Julian to write her character out...She is filming until August and then wants to leave, going out on a high. She thinks that three (seasons) is enough and she wants to get back to the stage and big screen."

That means that, should there be a fourth season of Abbey, the Dowager Countess, a master of the potent one-line put-down, will be gone.

I.Am.Crushed.

Mitt Romney may appear on Saturday Night Live to, um, dispel the rumors that he's as dull as dishwater and stiff as a board. But, if he does it, Mittsy asks one thing of the SNL writers.

No, don't make him wear flip-flops isn't the right answer.

No, don't make fun of his millionaire stay-at-home-mom wife isn't it either.

Mittsy asks that the show be........Funny.

Because Mittsy knows comedy. I mean, look at his political career and aspirations.

High-larious.

And, speaking of Mittsy, we all know that his opinions are like buses: a new one will be along in five minutes. But while he is the Flip-flopper of the Romney household, Ann Romney has quickly become the delusional moron in charge.

First was the horrid struggle she endured by choosing to be a stay-at-any-number-of-homes mom, and now she's said this:

'Memba when people were all outraged that the Romney family strapped the family dog, Seamus, into an air-tight crate, and then put him on the roof of their car for a twelve hour road trip in 1983? And 'remeber how Seamus defecated all over himself and on the windshield, but also thoroughly enjoyed the experience?

Yeah, that';s Ann Romney';s newest spin.

“The dog loved it,” Ann Romney says, “He would see that crate and, you know, he would, like, go crazy because he was going with us on vacation."

Ann Romney cares as much about average stay-at-home mothers as she does about the family pet, and for her to suggest that the dog enjoyed being tied down to the roof of a car and forced to sh*t himself is reprehensible.

Of course, Mittsy took up the call, too, telling Diane Sawyer that he would do that again: "Certainly not with the attention it's received."

See, he wouldn't stop doing it  because it's inhumane to do such a thing, he'd stopped doing it because people noticed.

The Romneys. So fucking out of touch it's unbelievable.

Is Rush Limbaugh back on the Oxy?

Well, he's certainly sounding crazier than normal.

Limbaugh says that while using his iPhone with a voice-transcription feature that turns spoken words into printed text, a mysterious message suddenly showed up:

“Obama’s minions are taking over and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

That missive left the moron radio host just dumbfounded--emphasis on the dumb--as he noted, “I hadn’t said anything like that!”

But, true to form, Rush has no proof that his iPhone is sending him threats from Obama's Minions because, um, “I was so discombobulated by what happened that I didn’t save what showed up on my iPhone. I can’t prove this, because I didn’t keep the transcriptions. I deleted them. I don’t even know if I actually deleted them. I just didn’t send them. They are not on the phone. I went and looked.”

Discombobulated means totally off your effing rocker.

Jose Canseco. Baseball player. Steroid rager. Global warming expert.

He has been Tweeting about how global warming might have saved the Titanic.

Oh, but he has:

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Some new hotties crossing the screen these days.

Columbus Short, of ABC's Scandal

Henry Ian Cusick, also of Scandal and, of course, Lost

François Arnaud, of Showtime's The Borgias

Neal Bledsoe, the hot gay Republican on Smash

Christian Cooke, from Starz' Magic City