Just the other day, while entertaining Nelson Mandela, Christian Siriano, Oprah, and Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, among others, in my Fifth Avenue pied-à-terre, and discussing my recent Nobel Peace Prize for my work in Somalia with my husband David Beckham, we discovered a rather amusing little story about lying.
It seems that Congressman Mark Kirk, the Republican candidate for President Obama's old Illinois Senate seat has, um, inaccurately claimed to have received the U.S. Navy's Intelligence Officer of the Year award for service during NATO's conflict with Serbia in the late 1990s.
Turns out, however, that Kirk was, or is, to put it delicately, a fucking liar.
And his lie sparked a lot of news journalists, as well as his opponent in his senate race, one Hottie McHottie, Alexi Giannoulias, to seek the truth. Which they did.
Now, oddly enough, Kirk changed his website to offer a new, and different, account of the award, writing on his blog: "[U]pon a recent review of my records, I found that an award listed in my official biography was misidentified."
Misidentified.
Kirk-speak for "I lied and got caught."
It seems that the National Military Intelligence Association, gave Kirk's entire unit an award for outstanding service in 2000, but the Vice Admiral Rufus L. Taylor Award does not mention Kirk specifically, and instead designates the entire Intelligence Division.
Kirk also, um, misidentified the award publicly, during a House committee hearing in March 2002, in which he said, and these are his words: "I was the Navy's Intelligence Officer of the Year."
Uh huh.
Uh huh.
When, oh when, are people going to realize that their lies will be uncovered? A simple Google search proved Kirk lied, er, misidentified, his achievements. Seriously, a few mouse clicks and you can uncover the truth of what anyone says.
Which is what we were all laughing about at my penthouse party, while Oprah polished my Best Actor Oscar, and James Earl Jones and Madonna read passages from my Pulitzer Prize wining novel, The Truth Is A Website Away, and Martha Stewart served petit-fours and champagne to my guests.
When will people learn.
You lie.
You get caught.
Right, Oprah? Oprah? For the love of god, woman, that rack of lamb is for all of us!
I think this is the same guy who may get outed from the closet within the next few days by the same blogger who outed Larry Craig and Mark Foley. What a group to be associated with.
ReplyDeleteI loved your insight about Oprah. Hilarious.
ReplyDeleteAnd it's nice to live near Alexi. Just sayin'
I was saying just the same thing to George Clooney when he dropped by to borrow a cup of sugar the other day.
ReplyDeleteGood post! And I should know since I've won a Pulitzer Prize.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, I did not know you were so accomplished :o)
ReplyDelete