Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Fighting The Battle In Our Own Ranks


I get homophobia. Really, I do; it's a simple matter of fear of the unknown and gay folks are, well, unknown to a lot of people. And we can take some of the blame ourselves because we aren't all out. See, I believe that when people know someone who's gay, then they are apt to be less afraid. They're going to see that we aren't child molester's out to recruit the next generation or that we're trying to destroy the very fabric of life. They'll see that we just want the same things everyone else takes for granted: the right to love and marry the person we choose; the right to live openly and safely in any community in the country; the right to be ourselves without the fear of being fired, or beaten, or murdered.

Homophobia is another form of racism. Although gay people aren't a race, per se. We're more of a catwalk. It's like, say, living in an all-white neighborhood and suddenly a black family moves in. You don't know any black people, have never dealt with black people, so there's bound to be a little apprehension, I guess. Same goes for an all-black neighborhood when the Hispanic family or Asian family moves in. It's a fear of the unknown, the new, the never-before-seen. But if you just open up to the fact that people are different, whether it be ethnicity gender, age, religion, sexual orientation, you'll come to see that we are all more alike that you thought possible.

So, like I said, I get homophobia. But, what I don't get are gay homophobes. Those gay men and women so deeply closeted that they will lash out at the gay community just to keep themselves "safe." They believe if they denounce being gay, no one will ever suspect that they might be gay themselves. And that makes me, wonder, how do they live their lives they go home? How do they sleep at night when they've spent the day verbally gay bashing? What's life like in that big self-loathing closet they call home?

Andre Bauer, the Lt. Governor of South Carolina, was recently outed by activist Mike Rogers who has spoken to several men who claim to have had sexual relations with Bauer, or been hit on by him. All of the stories bear the same thread of truth so Rogers, who was featured in the movie Outrage about closeted gay politicians, feels certain that Bauer is gay.

If Bauer is gay, does it matter? Should it?

Yes, it does and should. If Bauer is a gay man, then he is guilty of the worst case of homophobia. He is a right-wing Christian conservative who voted to allow license plates, state issued license plates, with a cross and the words "I believe" on them, and he has come out strongly against gay marriage. He's against allowing himself the same rights as other Americans.

I get homophobia from straight people. I can understand where it comes from and why, but I don't understand the thinking behind being gay and homophobic. How sad it must be, to be Andre Bauer and go home every night knowing he's working hard to keep gay people down, to keep gay people as second-class citizens, when he's one himself.

How sad.

But then we also have the case of Mary Cheney, openly gay daughter of former Vice president Dick Cheney. Openly gay. It sounds nice. She couldn't possibly be a homophobe, could she?

Maybe so. Mary Cheney, just last May, donated $1,000 to the election campaign of Ohio Congressman Rob Portman. Okay, so what's the beef, you say? Well, Rob Portman voted yes on banning gay adoptions in the District of Columbia in 1999 and in 2004 he voted in favor of a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage.

It makes me wonder what is wrong with Mary Cheney. What goes on in her head, this gay, partnered woman, who shares a son with her, well, girlfriend since they can't possible be married, what makes her give money to a man who says she, Mary Cheney, does not have the same rights and freedoms as every other American in the country.

It must be sad to be so self-loathing that you'll support a candidate with your own money, who seeks to deny you basic rights. And it must be just as sad to be Andre Bauer, a politician pushing through an agenda that seeks to keep himself down, to keep him from having the same rights and freedoms as everyone else.

I get homophobia. I understand the fear of the unknown. But what I don't understand self-loathing gay men and women who openly work to deny other gay men and women their rights.

How sad.

10 comments:

  1. Anonymous9:49 AM

    I try to understand the same things. How can a gay person not support gay rights? Boggles the mind. And it is very sad.

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  2. I can not stand Mary Cheney! She is the worst gay in the world in my book. that dumb dyke had the opportunity of a lifetime to take a stand and instead she became a lap dog for her evil father!

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  3. I think that behind their homophobia, is their own class protection and political power. You see Andre Bauer is not the only one in the Republican Party that "breaks their conservative rules" and gets away with it. He does it because it is his political maneuver to power. As for Mary Cheney, the same holds true. There are rumors that Papa Cheney is running for Presidential Nomination for the GOP. I wont be surprised that her endorsement for the Ohio Congressman was an attempt on her part to silence the conservative right within her party, so that daddy Cheney can move on with his political ambitions. She is a member of one of the most feared family that controls the political power on this country. She has much to loose if she were to opposed her family's interest. She has far more protection selling out her lesbian sisters, than opposing Papa Cheney. Hey she might even loose her home; well at least that is how her homophobia operates.

    She is an example of how Oligarchies are ruling Washington. While they set the political discourse for an entire nation, their offsprings and those who favor their agenda can get away with straying from their rules, while gaining protection at the same time. Lets say Right Wing takes control over Washington and Political persecution against LGTB were to increased, do you think Bauer or Cheney are going to be affected?

    Latin America, have plenty of examples on this subject, Hey Pinochet had a General, that was were known for raping men and persecuting gays while indulging in his own homoerotic escapades with his servicemen. And who can forget the down low dictator Manuel Antonio Noriega from Panama. The highest ranking official had a troupe of men for his sexual pleasures.

    Not only do I think it is necessary for them to be exposed, but for them to be exposed within their own homophobes supporters. Let see what Limbaugh, and Steven Anderson, and all those right wing nut-cases have to say about the Mary Cheney and the Andre Bauers on their republican party. I will like to have them sit in front of them and see what kind of dynamics emerge. The same way repugs are affecting and polarizing the democrats, democrats should retaliate in the same way.

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  4. Anonymous10:22 AM

    Some of my readings have lead me to the conclusion that the powers that be are applying the divide and conquer approach and part of that is to get people to vote against things that are in the best interests of the people.

    Because education in the U.S. is so poorly executed, there aren't a lot of people who can apply critical thinking skills.

    And so the wool gets pulled over the eyes of the sheeple and they'll vote against their own best interests on a regular basis.

    Best example of that I've seen was a beat up, rusted out Buick sedan with a Bush/Cheney 2004 bumper sticker on it.

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  5. Excellent post, Bob! Well-written and thought-provoking comments, Lelo and Truth!

    "Because education in the U.S. is so poorly executed, there aren't a lot of people who can apply critical thinking skills."

    And it's getting worse! All this emphasis on test scores and NCLB are making it hopeless. I'm a retired teacher who taught critical thinking skills among other things and am so upset by the way things are. My friends who are still teaching despair over the way things are now.

    I didn't know about Noriega and the others. Interesting.

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  6. It IS sad, and I think you're right that there's an element of self-loathing there.

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  7. Except you are missing a few things.
    1) We don't know that this guy is really gay. So, an activist has decided that he is, but that alone doesn't mean a whole lot.
    2) Your justification for trashing him is license plates? Get a freakin' grip! Politicians pick battles on a daily basis, and make choices and compromises. President Obama has come out against gay marriage. Clinton signed DOMA. So, you have decided (based on one person's accusation) that this guy is gay and self hating because he allowed license plates, and expressed the same views on gay marriage as our current progressive president?

    If you can come up with more than that, then feel free to attack this guy. But unlike Portman, has his voting record really harmed the GLBTQ communities, and even if he has, casting him as a self-hating homophobe- harkens back to the days when a single man could make the accusation of being a communist and ruin someone's life or career.

    GLBTQ people won't gain equality by using accusations and attacks but rather by building coalitions and speaking out for equal rights. By getting engaged at all levels of government. We each need to be picking up the phone, writing letters and visiting with our elected officials, letting them know that it is important to us that they vote and support legislation that creates equality. Yes, this is a form of being Out, but it is not just being Out, but engaging as a GLBTQ person with our elected officials.

    Have you spoken to your state representatives or federal senators today? Put your time there instead of spreading accusations about someone. That will help us gain equal rights.

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  8. Thomas: Two things. You are mssing a point in my post. Like where I said this:
    "If Bauer is gay, does it matter? Should it?"
    See there: IF. IF Bauer is gay.
    And yes, the license plate issue bothers me a great deal. With all that goes on in this country he wants to create license plates to promote religion? Separation of church and state, anyone? And, if you don't care about his Cross License plates, then why does he not propose a Star of David License plate, a Muslim license plate? A non-denominational license plate? An agnostic or atheist license plate?
    And Bauer's record as being anti-gay marriage is what I'm referring to; IF ....see there IF.... he's gay and is promoting an anti-gay marriage platform then I have every right to attack him and call him a hypocrite and a slef-loathing homosexual.

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  9. Well written, well said. Bob, you have a lot more patience and kindness than I do. I'm not looking forward to the first faceless person that attacks me on my blog, apparently for all the wrong reasons. I will have to look to your example on that day.

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  10. With a comment like “even if he has(been homophopic), casting him as a self-hating homophobe- harkens back to the days when a single man could make the accusation of being a communist and ruin someone's life or career” Thomas sounded like a self-defecating homo. He will rather shit on himself, than to risk using an Outing tactic that can send a message to closeted homophobes politicians, to stop the hypocrisy. And while I get his point about building coalition, what is blogging all about but if not a coalition building strategy? How can he not include blogging as a tactical measure for the “we” he is referring to, to grow and to informed ourselves, before “we” pick up the phone or take a trip to “our” local congressmen offices. If he wants to spend himself defending repugs that don’t give a shit about his “we”, let him knocked himself out. I for one think that his Mother Theresa complex is not needed in this case.

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