Random Musings

One day last week, very early in the morning, we heard a crash outside our house. After several days of rain and wind, we thought maybe a tree, or part of a tree, had come down in the yard.
So, I took a look outside, front and back, and up the driveway. Nothing.
But a couple of seconds after Carlos left, he called the house and said he'd found the source of the noise. Someone, some asshat, had hit a fawn on the road, and the poor thing was dead at the top of our driveway.
Now, to be fair, we live on a busy road that many people use to avoid the downtown Smallville area. Like most cities, that have their beltways--those freeways that loop around the metropolitan area--we live on what I'd call more of a suspender--it goes up one side of town.
Still, slow the fuck down people.
I so wanted to hang a large sign from our mailbox that read: You Killed That Deer, MotherFucker.

I want to be on Chris March's new show just so I can sit in the workroom and giggle. If giggling is a paid position, of course


So, Herman Cain, the Godfather of Pizza, or something like that, believes homosexuality is a choice.
Oh, but he does.
In fact, he also believes that the Occupy Wall Street protesters are only protesting because they aren't rich. And they aren't rich because it's their fault: "Don’t blame Wall Street, don’t blame the big banks, if you don’t have a job and you’re not rich, blame yourself!"
See, gay people choose to be gay, and poor people are poor because it's all their fault.
Oh, Hermy, another in a long line of wackadoodie failed GOP presidential candidates who have not a snowballs chance in hell of being elected.
All you're doing is making Mitt Romney look good.
That's your choice.
And that's all your fault.

Mary Bach just has to get her two-cents worth, even if it means going to court.
Mary Bach sued Walmart over a two-penny discrepancy on her receipt--and won.
It seems that Mary Bach, who must have a lot of time on her hands, went shopping at her local Walmart, and purchased a package of Banquet "Brown 'N Serve" sausages that was listed at 98 cents.
At the register, however, the sausage rang up at $1.00, and sent Mary Bach over the edge. Well, not yet. She pointed out the discrepancy to the cashier and accepted a two-penny refund.
But Mary Bach was alarmed at the price gouging, and a few days later she returned to WalMart and picked up another package of sausages. Whoosh, that girl must love her Brown'n'Serves!
And again, her 98-cent sausages rang up at a dollar!
Oh.....the.....horror!
This time Mary Bach decided that a refund wouldn't cut it, and so she filed a civil suit against WalMart, and not for the first time. Mary Bach: "This is the fifth lawsuit that I have now won against this store, this Delmont Walmart for the same problem: practice of putting up a shelf tag that was lower than the price charged at the cash register."
Walmart alleged that Mary Bach only purchased the meats so she could file another lawsuit against the store, and, well, maybe they also alleged that Mary Bach find a new hobby, or, oh, I dunno, SHOP SOMEWHERE ELSE!
Mary Bach was awarded $100 in damages and about $80 in court costs.
Seriously, Mary Bach, get a life, lay off the sausages.


There have been a slew of sexual assaults on women in South Park Slope and surrounding areas of Brooklyn, and local authorities have some advice for women in that area.
Did they say that women shouldn't go out alone at night? No.
Perhaps they suggested that women travel with mace or pepper spray? Not so much.
What some members of the local police have suggested to women is that stop dressing in shorts and skirts, because, you know, when women dress like that they're just asking to be attacked.
Oh, yes, they did say that.
Seriously, when do we stop blaming the victims for their assaults?


Oh that wack-a-doo Michele Bachmann.
While running her presidential campaign into the ground with all her craziness, it turns out that Little Miss Government, Little Miss Constitution, is actually Little Miss Votes.
I mean, she missed voting.
Bachmann has missed 150 votes in the House since announcing her candidacy for president; a figure that represents nearly half of all House votes held since June 13. Bachmann missed every vote held in September. The last time she cast a vote? August 1.
Let me ask you this: if you have a job, but you want a better job, how many of you would be able to stop doing your current job, while still accepting a paycheck from that job, and go on the road begging for a new job?
I seriously think that if these politicians, who are currently in office, wish to seek another office, then they should have to quit their job before beginning a campaign.
I mean, Hello Minnesota? You're paying this asshat to work for you and since the middle of June she hasn't been doing so.
Fire the bitch.

And finally, a bit of good news, though it's not at all surprising.
Media whore, money whore, half-term quitter and outright loon, Mama Grizzly Bore® will not be running for president this, or any other, year, saying [note; the stuff in read, well, maybe she didn't actually say]:
"After much prayer [and checking my bank account ...which is dwindling so i need to get out there and whore myself and my family for all its worth] and serious consideration [and the realization that I'll make more money as a whiny illiterate media whore], I have decided that I will not be seeking the 2012 GOP nomination for President of the United States. As always, my family comes first and obviously Todd and I put great consideration into family life before making this decision. When we serve, we devote ourselves to God, family and country. My decision maintains this order. [See what I did there? I said my family comes first, but then I listed them second. Even reading a prepared statement I am a dumbass].
My decision is based upon a review of what common sense [and I know, I don't have any sense, much less common sense] Conservatives and Independents have accomplished, especially over the last year. I believe that at this time I can be more effective in a decisive role to help elect other true public servants to office – from the nation’s governors to Congressional seats and the Presidency. [I know! I know! i said this three years ago when I quit being governor because it was too hard and I didn't do anything then, but i promise I will this time, I promise.] We need to continue to actively and aggressively help those who will stop the “fundamental transformation” of our nation and instead seek the restoration of our greatness, our goodness and our constitutional republic based on the rule of law.
From the bottom of my heart I thank those who have supported me and defended my record throughout the years, and encouraged me to run for President. Know that by working together we can bring this country back – and as I’ve always said, one doesn’t need a title to help do it. [Which works for me, because I will never have a title other than Mama Grizzly Bore®.]"
So long, MGB®.
You're toast.