I Ain't One To Gossip, But.....

Oh, the nasty divorce and custody battle between Kelsey Grammer and his Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ex-wife, Camille, rages on.

It seems that Kelsey won his latest custody battle in court, when he was awarded a full week of custody of his two young children. Yes, a father gets a full week with his children. i thought, Well, shouldn't that be a given? But there's more to that story, which I'll get to in a moment.
Now it seems that Kelsey wants Camille to shut her yap. She dogs him on RHoBH--even though he insisted she take the gig, shortly before he dumped her for this year's model Missus Grammer.
But he wants Camille to stop talking about him, and he wants her to make their children stop talking about him, or about anything. All of this stems from a run-in with the paparazzi, during which the couple's son was asked what he liked to do, and Camille urged him to respond.
Kelsey ran straight to court to ask that Camille be banned from allowing her children to be the subject of paparazzi fodder. Or even speak to them when they say, Hey, what do you like to do?
I think Kelsey is being a bit of a dick here. i mean, he basically forced his wife to take the part in a reality show while he went to to New York to star in a play and then asked for a divorce so he could marry for the, I think it's the fourth time. And now she can't talk about him and his children simply cannot talk at all.
But what about that full week of custody? Oh yeah, Kelsey won, and was able to have custody of his own children for the week, but Camille was still obliged to take them to all their scheduled activities because their dad was busy.
Or couldn't be bothered.
Or was back in court filing another complaint.
I don't see dad Of The Year in Kelsey Grammer's future.

There's been all sorts of buzz about Beyonce's pregnancy, ever since she went from not showing to showing in the space of a day. i really don't care, that much, because I really don't care for Beyonce.
Don't hate. She just ain't my diva.
But now, there's this odd video of Beyonce being interviewed, and as she walks to her chair to sit down, her baby bump seems to fold in on itself like a deflating basketball. Here's the video:

And so many folks are jumping on anyone who criticizes Beyonce about the Magic Folding Bump. I mean, it's like it's a sin against nature, or a crime against humanity to question why her stomach seems to be appearing and disappearing, and doing all sorts of tricks.
But now the so-called legitimate, mainstream press is jumping on the story, too. People magazine--yes, they are considered legitimate press--as well as Us Weekly--again, legitimate--and even ABC News and the Washington Post. They’ve all run stories about the “bump conspiracies”.
And it's gotten so bad that Beyonce’s publicist Yvette Noel-Schurecame out for damage control, saying to legitimate press outlet ABC News, about the rumors: “Stupid, ridiculous and false.”
So, what are the "stories"?
People are saying she's not pregnant and just faking it until a surrogate gives birth to her child, at which time she'll show off her newborn. Maybe.
People are saying she isn't due in February like she says, which explains the miraculous appearance of The Bump.Perhaps.
People are saying she's wearing the fake bump for the simplest of reasons: fame whoring. She was first seen with The Bump at the VMAs, cradling it for the cameras, but she was flat-bellied and fit just a few days prior. They say she wanted to be the center of attention, so she strapped on a prosthetic, and she created her own media-storm. Could be.
People are saying The Bump might have something to do with deflecting attention from her recently tweaked face. They say that beyonce debuted a new face a few months back, like a nose job, or eyebrow lift. Who knows.
The fact is, whatever the reason, whatever the tale, it's Beyonce. This is a woman who lives for press and knows how to market herself. She's on more magazine covers than anyone else, she has her own clothing line, her own perfume, and even has her own cookbook, though she admits she doesn't cook.
Next up? Maybe a string of Beyonce Pump'n'Go's nationwide, where you can get gas, a spritz of cheap perfume, a cookbook, and a deflating basketball to wear as an accessory.

i sort of loathe Kristen Stewart; she of the Twilight saga.
I've seen about twenty minutes of the first one and about six minutes of part two, and can safely say that Kristen Stewart's acting style is basically a heavy-lidded put followed by a sigh.

She's.A.Genius.
But then again, maybe not.
See, now Kristen Stewart is claiming that her teachers failed her by not preparing more work for her while she was off being a child actress.
Oh, so she's dumb because her teacher's failed her and not because she's just dumb?
The Twilight "star" began performing when she was just eight years old, and balanced work with attending school before deciding to drop out of mainstream education in the seventh grade when she was in her early teens.
Dropout say what?
Stewart now claims that she felt forced to have home schooling because her teachers refused to help her catch up when she was working on location: “School became genuinely uncomfortable,” she says. “I was feeling a little self-conscious about the acting thing with my peers, but also my teachers became a problem. They didn’t want to do the extra work or put packages together so I could keep up while away. They failed me. My teachers failed me. Not one, but all of them."
No, dumbass, you failed yourself by thinking so highly of your self-indulgent ass that you didn't need to be schooled.
Heavy-lid.Pout.Sigh.
Shut up.


Of course, what would a weekend gossip post be without some mention Of Lohan?
She's being sued. Again.

Apparently Lohan doesn't like to pay her bills, and the limo company to which she owes $90,000 is coming after her for the bill she tossed in the trash, along with her career and any sense of dignity she might have ever had.
And the $90,000 is almost the exact same sum of money she spent buying herself a new Porsche. Co-inky-dink? Ya think?
Elite Transportation Limo and Security Services claims Lindsay rode with them from February 2009 to May 2009, and also booked limos for her friends, family and dealers. And with penalties and late charges, the $33,978 bill has now swelled to $90,585.79.
That’s how she rolls.
This is the same Lindsay who told a judge she couldn't afford therapy for her habitual criminal activity, drug and alcohol abuse. See, who needs to have those things when there are limos to ride in, Porsche's to buy, and necklaces to purch.....steal.
Cracktress, wacktress.

Like I said last week, i like me some Bethenny Frankel because she's a snarky abrasive tequila drinking bitch, like me.

But, ALLEGEDLY, she also loves a tall tale.
And here's two of them:
Item One:
She was recently lost at sea while vacationing on some fab tropical island. Literally, she was lost at sea and spent the night wondering if she'd ever see land or people or a paycheck and a reality show camera again.
Okay, maybe that last one, not so much, because, there are folks in the know who say Frankel staged to whole Gilligan, lost at sea, thing for an episode of her reality show.
Reality? Meet Bethenny.
Item Two:

Now comes word that her Skinnygirl brand, which she says she sold to Jim Beam for $120 million, making her quite the shrewd businesswoman, actually sold for about $112 million less than she announced, making her quite the, um, shrew.
Jim Beam isn't talking, and neither is Bethenny, but $8 for a mixed drink, bottled concoction company sounds far more realistic than $120 million.
I mean, anyone remmeber Zima?
Maybe Bethenny could her new company Tall Tales and Reality Show Mixers.

Cheating is good for a marriage.
Quick, someone tell Ashton and Demi.

See, about a year and a half ago “Bones” actor David Boreanaz admitted to the public that he had cheated on his wife. That was, of course, in advance of the fact that Tiger Wood's main whore, Rachel Uchitel, was about to go to the press with details and text messages revealing an affair with Boreanaz.
Quick question: what famous man hasn't Rachel Uchitel fucked? My guess would be that she's schtupped them all.
Back to Boreanaz, who said at the time:  “Our marriage has been tainted with my infidelities. I just want to be open and honest… I was associated with a woman who I was involved with and had a relationship with. She asked for money. I felt as though I was being blackmailed or there was some sort of extortion.”
See how he tries to make himself sound like one of the good guys, even though he stuffed his Lil Boreanaz into a Uchitel?
Boreanaz’s wife forgave him, though, and I’m sure the $30,000 diamond and gold bracelet he gave her didn’t hurt matters, but now the 42-year-old Dick York lookalike is talking about his cheating, and how it's not really his fault, and how schtupping the Pass-Around Girl saved his marriage: “In a sacred ground like marriage, you find yourself out of it at certain times for reasons unknown that can be destructive. There could be a demon that kind of comes out and overtakes you...Do I believe in giving up? No, I don’t. I’m a fighter. I’m a lover.”
Apparently. And you do it a lot, with a woman who does it a whole lot.
Still, marriage is hard, and if you have a hard Boreanaz then go ahead and park it wherever you want, and then say, after you gave your wife some trinkets, that it's all been good.
Until you get caught again.