I Didn't Say It.....

Jon Stewart, on the rhetoric of violence:

"I do think that its important for us to watch our rhetoric, I do think that its a worthwhile goal not to conflate our political opponents with our enemies if for no other reason than to draw a better distinction between the manifestos of paranoid mad men and what passes for acceptable political and pundit speak. It would be really nice if the ramblings of crazy people didn’t in any way resemble how we actually talk to each other on TV. Let’s at least make troubled individuals easier to spot."

Who knew a comedian would be the one with the level head?

If we all start ranting and reloading at one another, then we all look like crazy people, and act like crazy people, and, sad to say, react like crazy people.

Country singer Chely Wright, on how coming out as gay has affected her career:

"It didn’t help my career. My record sales went directly in half. If it appears from the outside in that it’s helped my career, it could be because I haven’t talked about the negative. You won’t hear me bitching and moaning on my Facebook about the hate mail I’ve gotten. My life has been threatened. I get nasty letters every day, 'I’m through with you Chely Wright, you’re going to hell.' There’s a big difference between press and advocacy and…. sometimes people forget that people who sing or make movies, this isn’t just a hobby for us. This is how I pay my bills. In coming out I had a feeling that it would diminish my wage earning, and that feeling was correct. And, I am fine with that."

Proving that, even if coming out is detrimental, financially, or even emotionally, it's a whole lot better than hiding and lying and feeling any sort of shame.

Cindy Jacobs, wackadoo member of Generals International, who believes the mass fish and bird deaths is caused by the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell:

"[L]et’s talk about this Arkansas pattern and say, could it be a pattern? We’re going to watch and see. But the blackbirds fell to the ground in Beebe, Arkansas. Well the Governor of Arkansas’ name is Beebe. And also, there was something put out of Arkansas called "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" by a former Governor, this was proposed, Bill Clinton. As so, could there be a connection between this passage [Hosea 4] and now that we’ve had the repeal of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, where people now legally in the United States have broken restraints with the Scripture because the Scripture says in Romans 1 that homosexuality is not allowed. It could be because we have said it’s okay for people who commit these kinds of acts to be recognized in our military for the first time in our history, there is a potential that there is something that actually happened in the land where a hundred thousand drum fish died and also where these birds just fell out of the air."

Wow.

Really. Wow.

Sometimes the only way to respond to crazy talk like this is to just shake one's head and move along....

Tom Ford, on gay relationships, and his twenty-four year commitment to his partner Richard Buckley:

"One of the things that always amuses me -- amuses isn’t even the right word, because it doesn’t amuse me -- but often, I’m at dinner parties with very close friends, straight, and they realize that Richard and I have been together 24 years, and the response is often, "Wow, you guys have been together 24 years! That’s so amazing. I don’t think of gay men being together that long." And I’m, like, "Why? What are you talking about?" Some of the longest relationships I know of are same-sex couples. A lot of my straight friends have married and divorced and married and divorced in the time Richard and I have been together. I think that preconception, from even very educated liberal friends, that being gay is possibly more sex-based than emotionally based, is surprising and shocking in today’s world."

If any relationship, gay or straight, was based purely on sex, then no one would be in a committed relationship.

Gay relationships, as I've said time and time and time again, are just the same as straight relationships, except the genders are different.

They match.

Will & Grace co-creator Max Mutchnick, on Richard Chamberlain's recent statement about gay actors staying in the closet if they want to work:

 “I don’t think the audience is as homophobic as the media would have us believe. Neither is Hollywood. I’ve never denied an actor a job because he was gay. But I have denied actors jobs because they suck."

It's called show business for a reason, because, while part of it is art, money is the bottom line.

So, if a gay actor or actress gets audiences in the theater, or in front of their television sets, no one cares.
Richard Chamberlain is till speaking from that place of fear that kept him closeted throughtout the majority of his career.

Wackadoo preacher Cindy Jacobs, again, on how God will split California in half if Proposition 8 is repealed:

"A pastor of a large Nazarene Church had a dream of a very large earthquake on the central coast. He shared this at the Christmas gathering for all the Santa Maria Pastors and 5 cities area. Because of the destruction and intensity of the quake he thought he should tell the Pastors so they could pray into it. Another intercessor in the area had a dream and saw a map of California. She noticed on the map how Pt. Conception juts out into the water. As she looked she saw an 8 with a circle beside it in the waters off Pt Conception. Prop 8 is a foundational covenant issue, i.e. issue of marriage, in the state. If the state supreme court does not uphold it, a covenant issue is broken with God. Judgment is looming.".

Oh, Cindy, honey, you give us too much credit.

I mean, seriously, repealing DADT causes mass animal deaths and repealing Prop H8 will cause a massive earthquake?

If we had that power, do you really think we'd need to go through the courts to gain equality?

No, we'd just stand under a disco ball and call our God, Judy Garland, down from the club, to send glitter and rainbows throughout the land until we get what we want.

Birther loon, Theresa Cao:

"Literally if this question of the natural born citizenship, if this question does not get answered, then I am allowing a tyrannical dictator – the spirit of the anti-Christ, the new world order system that has their plans right this second to collapse the U.S. economy, and we know their plan, the new world order system's plan is to literally destroy humanity. He [Obama] has fought it not only for two years, not only has he fought it pre-election but historically all of his connections, every single connection [has been] blacked out. It's prophesied this new world order system will devastate America and the world, and Satan's plan is to take as many people to hell with him as he can. "

Wow. He's not born here and he's the anti-Christ.

Again, as I said about Cindy Jacobs, if Obama has all that power Theresa, as the anti-Christ surely must have, couldn't he make the Earth open up and sallow all the birthers?

Please?

An excerpt from The Hipster Huckleberry Finn, which substitutes "hipster" wherever the n-word appears in the original:

"Jim was monstrous proud about it, and he got so he wouldn't hardly notice the other hipsters. Hipsters would come miles to hear Jim tell about it, and he was more looked up to than any hipster in that country. Strange hipsters would stand with their mouths open and look him all over, same as if he was a wonder. Hipsters is always talking about witches in the dark by the kitchen fire; but whenever one was talking and letting on to know all about such things, Jim would happen in and say, 'Hm! What you know 'bout witches?' and that hipster was corked up and had to take a back seat."

Oh, yeah, that's much better.

Now kids that read Finn will never truly know what life was like in Twain's time; it'll be whitewashed and sanitized beyond recognition.

Gore Vidal, on Michele Bachmann's claim that she became a Republican after being horrified by Vidal's "trashing" of the Founding Fathers in his 1973 novel, Burr:"She is too stupid to deserve an answer."

Who says a writer needs to take pages and pages to get a point across.

Sometimes succinct does the trick quite nicely.