The Funny Papers

Michael de Adder, Nick Anderson, Ed Wexler, Rick McKee, Ken Catalino, Ed Hall, Darrin Bell, Jack Ohman, John Cole, Clay Bennett, Dave Whamond, Steve Sack, Deb Milbrath, Mike Thompson, Marc Murphy

Tuesday Thought #2

Tuesday Thought #2

The Funny Papers

Steve Sack, Jack Ohman, Nate Beeler, Paresh Nath, Clay Bennett, Mike Luckovich, Nick Anderson, Peter Brooks, Rob Rogers

Sean Spicer and The Case Of Bumbling Ineptitude

Look, most of us believe the White House is a hot mess of stupidity and lies and treachery and buffoonery, but when it’s blatantly shown to you, clearly, simply, it’s still a Shake Your Head moment.

Yesterday on the heels of FBI Director James Comey testifying that there is no evidence, again there is no evidence, that anyone, much less former President Obama, wiretapped _____ Tower, White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer held a press briefing and tried to spin.

Tried; failed. Failed gloriously.

The first blow was right out of the gate when Spicer was given a direct quote of Comey’s about the wiretapping and the complete and utter lack of evidence or proof, other than _____’s flapping fingers on Twitter.

Spicer’s response:

 “We’ve started a hearing, it’s still ongoing.  This is one in a series of hearings that will be happening.  There’s a lot of things that aren’t being covered in this hearing that I think are interesting  that, since it’s ongoing I’ll leave that for now.  There’s a lot of information that needs to be covered.  There are things that still need to be discussed.”

And then it happened; seconds later, the same reporter asked Spicer about another thing that Comey testified to, that _____ and his entire team are indeed being investigated by the FBI for their links to Russia and the interference in last year’s election.

Spicer’s response:

 “…Investigating it and having proof of it are two different things.   I think it’s fine to look into it, but at the end of the day, they are going to come to the same conclusion that everybody else has.  So you can continue to look for something, but continuing to look for something that doesn’t exist, doesn’t matter.”

Hypocrisy much? First he defends investigations and congressional hearings and then, literally, in a matter of seconds, he attacks the very idea of investigations and hearings saying they shouldn’t be taken seriously.

At.The.Same.Press.Conference.

And then, thanks to Time Magazine reporter Zeke Miller who nailed Spicer by asking:

 “Why, in one case, is it sufficient to say that we can rule out [allegations of] collusion now, [but] in the other case you can say there’s going to be more information coming out that will prove the [President’s] tweets correct?”

Spicer muttered and stammered and then moved on to another question, hoping he was off the hook.

He’s not; nor is anyone in the White House because now we know they are all being investigated for their lies and their collusion with Russia and I, for one, cannot wait for this trainwreck to implode and for the thin-orange-skinned-narcissist-with-the-tiny-fingers-and-the-fragile-ego to be impeached and run out of office or, what I actually think will happen, for him to quit to save his ass.

Either way, win, win.

Occupy Democrats

Is Rep. Aaron Schock On The Down [ton Abbey] Low?

I have never been to the Rayburn House Office Building is Washington, DC, where many members of Congress have their offices, bit according to Ben Terris of the Washington Post, it’s your typical drab, beige, bureaucratic government building.

When a member of Congress moves into an office in the Rayburn, the rooms are spare and bare; furniture and computers are of the hand-me-down-from-the-last-tenant variety. But new members are allowed to paint, though they have limited choices that the House will provide: beige, eggshell, light blue, light gray or light yellow — that the House will provide. If you wish a different color, then the lawmaker must pay for that.

Which is how we come to Congressman Aaron Schock’s offices; y’all remember Schock, right? He, of the turquoise belt and gingham blouse, er, shirt, in the photo that went viral; the one that made us all wonder if he might be a little light in the Congressional loafers?

Schock’s new office — his outer office — is bold, bright red; there are gold-colored wall sconces with black candles; there’s a Federal-style bull’s-eye mirror with an eagle perched on top and, according to the woman at the front desk, it’s “based off of the red room in ‘Downton Abbey.’”

How very Dowager Countess. Terris was suddenly interested, and then another woman came out and asked if he’d like to see the rest; would he?

She introduced herself as Annie Brahler, the interior decorator whose company, Euro Trash, designed Schock’s new digs. She escorted Terris into Schock’s private office, another dramatic red room with a crystal chandelier, a table propped up by two eagles, a bust of Abraham Lincoln and massive arrangements of pheasant feathers.

Pheasant feathers. Terris was intrigued, but then he received a call on his cell phone: Schock’s communications director, Benjamin Cole who asked who told him that he could photograph the office. Cole said, "Stay where you are. You’ve created a bit of a crisis in the office.”

A staff member came in and asked Terris to delete the photos from my phone, but, well, that didn’t exactly happen and that’s when the story really took off.

See, Schock’s people wanted Terris to delete the pictures, and not do any story about the redecoration of his offices, but rather allow Schock to talk about any number of other things … like the six pack abs he proudly displays on the cover of Men’s Health; or his Instagram, which features him leaping for joy on a South American glacier — see that photo HERE — or smiling with Ariana Grande.

You know, political stiff. Not the gossipy stuff like what his new office is like.

Brahler, happy to let a reporter tour the office and see her work, was taken aback by all the fuss over the pictures. She’d met Schock several years ago, after he’d seen her work featured in magazines and offered her services for free, though Schock, according to Congressional rules, would have to pay for the furnishings.

So she decorated his old offices in the Cannon House Office Building, and when he moved into the Rayburn, he called again; she admits that, while his office looks kind of Downton-esque, it’s not a replica of the television show, it's just what Schock wanted.

Meanwhile, back to Benjamin Cole, recovering from the fit he threw that a reporter was in the office; he explained that Schock hadn’t seen the finished space yet and wondered if it was a bit unfair to write about it before the congressman had seen it. Terris agreed, though he asked if he could be there when Schock got his first peek-a-boo.

That was all well and good, until Aaron Schock decided he wasn’t interested in doing a whole story about how his office is decorated; he’d talk about anything else — well, not the turquoise belt — but would rather not discuss his offices.

And he sent Cole, his communications director, to make a point to Terris: the office is definitely not based on Downton Abbey because, well, maybe Schock doesn’t watch the show and he definitely doesn’t want to talk about it.

But someone does want to talk, and that’s the Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington [CREW]  who have asked the Office of Congressional Ethics) to investigate whether Republican Schock violated House rules by accepting free interior decorating work for his not Downton Abbey inspired offices.

CREW reports, via press release:

 “Perhaps it’s not totally surprising that the same congressman who spent campaign money on P90X workout DVDs wanted to create a more picturesque setting in which to be photographed, but the rules clearly require him to pay for those renovations himself. Again and again, Rep. Schock’s seeming obsession with his image impedes his ability to conduct himself in ethical manner.”

House rules prohibit members of Congress from accepting gifts, which are defined in the rules as any “item having monetary value” — like interior decoration services — and the rules explicitly prohibit members from using “outside private donations, funds, or in-kind goods and services” — as in campaign contributions — to pay for their congressional office.

CREW is also asking that Schock be investigated as to whether or not he used campaign funds to pay for his office furniture. They state that in 2012 campaign paid $5,522 to Brahler’s company for what it described as “office equipment” but with the revelation now that Brahler redecorated Schock’s previous suite, they seem to believe that campaign funds were used to pretty up Aaron spaces — a clear violation of House rules.

Maybe Schock should have just asked Brahler to redecorate his closet; that way no one would have seen it except for him.

Just sayin’ … and then Aaron said, when cornered by NBC News to ask about his Downton Office:

“I'm different. I came to Congress at 27 … as Taylor Swift said, 'haters are gonna hate.'"

Downton-Abbey-Office-Working-Turquoise-Belt-Wearing-Shirltess-Congressman-Quoting-A-Taylor-Swift-Song.

So.Not.Gay.

sources:

Towleroad: Aaron Schock's New Office
Towleroad: Aaron Schock Ethics Charge
Washington Post
New Civil Rights Movement

The Height of GOP Stupidity, Part Two: The Summer of Love Festivities In Israel

Kevin "Skinny Dip" Yoder

Several members of the rightwing GOP, that holier than thou GOP, that GOP that wants to be the moral compass for the entire country, went on a privately-funded fact-finding mission in Israel last summer.

Tom Reed

Yet the only facts they seem to discover is that they are a bunch of drunken frat boys away from home and acting like fools. And now the FBI is investigating a late-night swim in the Sea of Galilee that involved drinking, numerous GOP freshmen lawmakers, top leadership staff, and one naked member of Congress.

That man is Representative Kevin Yoder from Kansas, who decided to shed his clothing and jump into the sea, joining a number of members, their families and GOP staff during a night out in Israel.

Other late night swimmers, sharing the waters with Nude Kevin Yoder, included the daughter of a fellow congressman--though she kept her clothes on. Other lawmakers, apparently looking for facts in the water, partially disrobed. 

Michael Grimm

Kevin Yoder: “A year ago, my wife, Brooke, and I joined colleagues for dinner at the Sea of Galilee in Israel. After dinner I followed some Members of Congress in a spontaneous and very brief dive into the sea and regrettably I jumped into the water without a swimsuit. It is my greatest honor to represent the people of Kansas in Congress and [for] any embarrassment I have caused for my colleagues and constituents, I apologize.”

What is most "regrettable" is that the people of Kansas elected this moronic frat boy to represent them.

Still, Yoder, unbelievably, has not been questioned by the FBI, who have been focusing on Representative Steve Southerland, of Florida, and his daughter--yes, he brought his daughter; Tom Reed, a congressman from New York, Ben Quayle of Arizona, Jeff Denham of California, and Michael Grimm, also from New York.

Jeff Denham

These, um, lawmakers are actually saying they went for their late-night, perhaps drunken, swim because of the religious significance of the waters. The smarter ones--I giggle, "smarter" ones--say they just wanted to cool off after a long day, but several of them admitted that maybe a little alcohol played a part in their party.

Steve Southerland

Majority Leader Eric Cantor, the senior most GOP lawmaker in Israel on the trip, was so upset about the antics that he rebuked the 30 lawmakers the morning after the incident, saying they were distracting from the mission of the trip. I think he was mad that he wasn't invited. You know he's pulled tighter than a zipper on a Star Jones dress.

Ben Quayle

And since Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy was also on the privately funded excursion, it means that two of the top three House Republicans were a part of this Summer of Love vacation. Though neither Cantor nor McCarthy went swimming that night, some of their staff did, which makes one wonder how well their staffs are chosen.

But that's the GOP. In this country they rail against wild behavior, and try to steer the morality of this country into a path they deem most suitable. But take them away from here, and get a little drink in 'em, and they become quite the representatives, and Representatives.

The height of GOP stupidity.

source