Bobservations

We eat a lot of fruit at Casa Bob y Carlos, especially for breakfast; we’ve always got blueberries, boysenberries, strawberries,  fresh pineapple, bananas and more on hand. The other morning, as I was fixing a bowl of fruit for myself, I said to Carlos:

“Have one of these bananas because they’re getting overly ripe.”

“I will.”

Cut to the next morning and that same banana is in the bowl and so I said:

“I thought you we’re going to eat that banana.”

“I was but I forgot so I’ll have it today.”

“Okay, but if you don’t have it today, I’ll shove it up your ass.”

“Oooooooooooh!”

“It’s kinda mushy.”

“Oh.”

Yes, that passes for breakfast conversation at Casa Bob y Carlos.

This post is from August 2021 and is less Tuxedo Says and more Tuxedo Did What, and is entitled “Oh No He Di’in’t”:

We had a bit of excitement around Casa Bob y Carlos yesterday. And by excitement, I mean, Carlos was almost murdered, and by murdered I mean I almost killed Carlos.

I decided to mow the lawns, and so I was out in the yard tooling around on the mower, with my phone in my pocket, ear buds in my ears, listening to music, and no doubt singing along and aloud to that music. I spotted Carlos cleaning up some branches that had fallen from a tree--we have a "Tree Guy" coming this week to "branch up" the trees--and wandering with Ozzo. My next pass around the yard and they were gone. My third pass around the yard was when I saw it ...

I thought it was Ozzo, still outside and roaming the yard, but upon closer inspection ... IT.WAS.TUXEDO. Carlos had obviously opened a door, and even in his old, creaky boned, wobbly legs state, Tuxedo left the building for the front yard. Luckily, because, again, even in his old, creaky boned, wobbly legs state, Tuxedo wandered to the big gate, which was open to get the mower through to the front yard for mowing and strolled around the back yard. And, again, even in his old, creaky boned, wobbly legs state, Tuxedo didn't hear the mower, and wasn't afraid and as I turned the engine off and dismounted ... scoring perfect tens across the board ... he came walking up to me as if to say:

"Look at me Daddy! I'm outside by myself."

I scooped him up and started toward the small gate to get him back inside, when Carlos rounded the corner; I said:

"Look who I found wandering the back yard!"

"How did he get out?"

Clearly, Carlos thinks Tuxedo has a key.

He dodged a bullet that day. Literally.

Did I understand all of the words of Bad Bunny's Super Bowl halftime show? No, but I understood the message and that’s what matters.

PS While roughly 5 million people watched Turning Point Media’s alternative halftime show AKA The Toilet Bowl, some 135 million watched and danced and smiled at Bad Bunny’s show.

Now, onto Stupid People Tweeting:

That one is from of those devout Christians who wouldn’t know the Bible from a Reader’s Digest, and here we have MAGAt superhero, Jerkules himself, Kevin Sorbo:

Idiots.

A little humor I found on the webs … and I will paraphrase it … my husband just bought a garden gnome for the yard. I named it Kristi Gnome cuz it’s hollow, artificial and my dog is terrified of it.

And speaking of Kristi’s ICEstapo … Just this past week, a US citizen in Salem, Oregon suffered a concussion, torn rotator cuff and bruised ribs after ICE officers boxed her in and smashed her car window.

After they dragged her from the car they discovered her passport in her purse and then left the scene without a care about her injuries or their brutality.

Abolish ICE.

The Lake Theater & Café in Lake Oswego, Oregon says Amazon pulled the new film “Melanie: From Whore House to White House” from screening after the theater’s  marquee offered its own descriptions of the film; one read—"Does Melanie wear Prada? Find out Friday”—and up there is another version.

The Lake Theater & Café is known for crafting witty, creative descriptions of its films on its sign and so when Amazon yanked Melanie away from them, they posted a new marquee:

Federico Cola is a 37-year-old Italian-born model who works Giorgio Armani, Andrea Marcaccini, La Gazzetta dello Sport, and Fendi but does that really matter or is it just Would You Hit It?

I Didn't Say It ...

Bad Bunny, first artist to win Album of the Year for a record sung entirely in Spanish, from the Grammy stage as he accepted his award:

“We are not savage, we are not animals, we are not aliens, we are humans and we are Americans. The hate gets more powerful with more hate. The only thing that is more powerful than hate is love. So, please, we need to be different.”

Wise words; and to be different we need to understand and accept how alike we are despite our differences.

Yes, let’s go after those immigrants committing crimes in this country, but those people aren’t the housewives and the student and the immigrants doing the right thing. They aren’t five-year-old boys or mothers or nurses.

The system is broken and we are allowing it to break.

Stand up!

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Christian Menefee, Democrat from Texas was sworn in as the newest Representative in the House, and said this:

“It’s been more than 330 days since the people of the 18th Congressional District had representation, had a voice in Congress. When this body took on important votes about whether to cut SNAP [Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program] benefits, about whether to make it more difficult to access Medicaid, important issues, this district had no voice in Congress, so this one is for the 18th [district].”

Taking a stand. Making a stand. And looking fine while he does it!

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Josh Gad, actor, on Cankles using his Slovenian Hooker wife’s “film” as a deflection for the fact that he’s a child rapist:

“The fact that we are waking up with all of the evidence everybody’s been screaming to see for the past 10 years finally out there, accusing [Cankles] in detail of some of the most horrific and evil things any of us have ever had to read, while he’s out there promoting his wife’s 40 million dollar Instagram reel is nothing short of insane. The media not covering this 24/7, however, is nothing short of pathetic and damning is beyond words.”

The rules don’t apply to the rich … well, the rich and white … well, the rich and white and male.

Time for a new way of life and we can start by punishing all the pedophiles no mater how many coins they have.

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Don Lemon, journalist, after his arrest by the Cankles regime:

“I have spent my entire career covering the news. I will not stop now. There is no more important time than right now, this very moment, for a free and independent media that shines a light on the truth and holds those in power accountable. Last night, the DOJ [Department of Justice] sent a team of federal agents to arrest me in the middle of the night for something that I’ve been doing for the last 30 years, and that is covering the news. The First Amendment of the Constitution protects that work, for me and for countless other journalists who do what I do. I stand with all of them, and I will not be silenced.”

No one should be silenced.

If you like Don Lemon or not the idea that a journalist can be arrested because a diaper soiling, nap taking, racist, rapist, fascist sociopath got his Pampers™ twisted is un-American and unless you want all media silenced vote the regime and all its Congressional lapdogs out of office.

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Bernie Sanders, on Jeff Bezos’ decision to lay off 30% of the Washington Post staff:

"If Jeff Bezos could afford to spend $75 million on the Melania movie & $500 million for a yacht to sail off to his $55 million wedding to give his wife a $5 million ring, please don't tell me he needed to fire one-third of the Washington Post staff. Democracy dies in oligarchy."

He wants the cash, and more cash, and all the cash. That’s Bezos; he has a wife to keep in plastic surgery, Botox, filler, and “chicken cutlets.”

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Shaboozey, a Nigerian-American singer and rapper, onstage after winning his first Grammy:

“Immigrants built this country, literally. So this is for them, for all children of immigrants. This is also for those who came to this country in search of a better opportunity to be part of a nation that promised freedom for all and equal opportunity to everyone willing to work for it. Thank you for bringing your culture, your music, your stories and your traditions here. You give America color.”

His statement reminds me of a video I saw with members of the ICEstapo trying to order lunch at a Mexican restaurant. The manager comes to the table and tells them to get out and then adds:

“You come here for our food and our music and our culture and then you go outside and throw us to the ground and detain us and send up to a camp. Get the fuck out.”

We all came here from somewhere else; and we brought our lives and hopes and dreams and pasts with us. Why is it suddenly wrong and bad and criminal to be an immigrant, unless you’re a white immigrant. Is it that simple?

Yes, for those on the right, it’s a matter of color.

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Bobservations

First off, thanks everyone for the birthday wishes. Tuesday was the day of my birth, but the celebration is a weeklong event. Carlos gifted me a day to myself on Tuesday as he had a conference to attend in Columbia and we will celebrate with a meal at one of our favorite restaurants in Asheville this weekend IF it doesn’t snow as predicted; in that case we’ll dine closer to home … 

So this past weekend we waited for The Storm. They said snow on Saturday with sub-freezing temperatures and then an ice storm on Sunday taking out trees and knocking out power.

Yeah; not so much. We got about an inch of snow that was gone before noon and then ice storm apparently melted before it arrived but …

On Sunday it was quite cold and Carlos decided to practice his trumpet in the sunroom with two of the four sliders open to the 20-degree air.

This from the man who drops an F-bomb every morning that the temperature is 35-degrees or less.

This from the man who sleeps under five blankets while wearing three pairs of socks, long underwear, sweatpants and a sweater.

But standing in a 20-degree sunroom? Now it was my turn for the F-bombs!

This Tuxedo Says is from August 2021 ...

Tuxedo watches a lot of CNN—like his daddy he has a wee crush on Anderson Cooper, whom he calls his Owner-In-My-Head … where does he come up with these things—and is amazed at the way Republicans think …or don’t actually think.

While we must remember Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti, ICE agents have also been responsible for the deaths of seven people of color since the first on the year.

Top Row, left to right:

Keith Porter Jr. was fatally shot by an off-duty ICE agent on New Year’s Eve outside his apartment complex. An LAPD spokesperson said Porter had fired gunshots into the air and a DHS spokesperson said the off-duty ICEstapo officer was “forced to defensively use his weapon” but offers no evidence to support that.

Parady La, Cambodian refugee, died while being held in ICEstapo custody at the Federal Detention Center in Philadelphia. He passed away after suffering severe drug withdrawal, with his family alleging medical neglect. 

Heber Sanchez Domínguez, a Mexican citizen, died while in ICEstapo custody at the Robert A. Deyton Detention Center in Georgia. The cause of death is currently under investigation. 

Victor Manuel Diaz, from Nicaragua, died in ICEstapo custody at Camp East Montana in El Paso, Texas. DHS says Diaz died of a presumed suicide but  the official cause of his death remains under investigation.

Bottom Row, left to right:

Luis Beltran Yanez-Cruz, from Honduras, died while under the custody of the ICEstapo after suffering a heart-related medical issue; his death is also under investigation.

Luis Gustavo Nunez Caceres, a Honduran citizen, died in ICEstapo custody in Texas of “complications related to congenital heart failure.”

Geraldo Lunas Campos, from Cuba,  died in custody at the ICEstapo detention center in Camp East Montana; the cause of death was "asphyxia due to neck and torso compression."

Last year, 32 people died in ICE custody, the most in a single year since the agency was created. 

Add their names to your rage.

Ticket sales for Amazon’s $40,000,000 documentary about the Slovenian Hooker’s return to the White have been, well, much like her husband’s penis, little and soft. According to one of Britain’s biggest cinema operators, Tim Richards, chief executive of Vue, just two tickets have been booked for the 6pm showing at Vue Islington on its opening evening.

Perhaps if Melanie had included her soft-core porn film as part of the documentary she might have sold three tickets.

The “No Kings” protests against the regime are returning March 28, this time with a flagship event in the Minneapolis on the heels of the ICEstapo murders on Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti.

Other demonstrations are expected again across the country.

Stand up; speak up; resist!

Thanks to Doc Heroin Addict the measles epidemic in South Carolina has spread to at least 789 people, surpassing the 2025 West Texas outbreak that sickened 762 people and killed two young girls. The majority of cases remain centered in Spartanburg County, mostly among people who were either unvaccinated or didn’t know their status.

South Carolina has long strived to be the best at something but who would have guessed it would be measles?

Good, fun news, because it has MAGAts in a giant snit, a rumor has it that Bad Bunny will wear a dress during his upcoming Super Bowl performance. And MAGAts are already ranting and raging all over X even though the story has not been substantiated.

Either way, I like the white, but the pink looks more fun, don’t you think?

Jhona Burjack is a model represented by agencies in New York, Los Angeles, Sydney, Hamburg, and São Paulo. It’s like he’s everywhere so … Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

The other night CBS aired a Grammy salute to Cyndi Lauiper with all kinds of special guests singing with Lauper at the Hollywood Bowl. but my favorite part of the show was Cyndi telling the stories of how she wrote her songs and I was telling Carlos about that when he suddenly said:

“At least she’s not related to Lindsay Lohan.”

“Why would she be related ... Oh no, you thought she was Cyndi Lohan and not Cyndi Lauper.”

See what I deal with? I guess I should count myself lucky that he didn’t think Cyndi was Ma-dough-na or Jell-O. 

This Tuxedo Says comes from April 29, 2021, …

“Tuxedo wants to play off of Carlson’s idea of berating people who wear masks by asking the entire country to berate anyone who works for, listens to, or believes Fox News.”

I still think it’s a good plan!

While millions of fans celebrated, Kid Rock decided to rant about Bad Bunny getting the Super Bowl Halftime Show with this brilliant bon mot:

“So now the Super Bowl’s letting TikTok dancers headline? What’s next, a mariachi band doing Drake covers? Bring back real performers, not reggaeton karaoke.”

Bad Bunny fired back with pure Latin heat:

“You mad ‘cause the only halftime show you’re getting is at the county fair. Don’t talk about ‘real performers’ when your biggest hit was before Wi-Fi existed. If culture moved past you, maybe try catching up instead of crying about it.”

Aaaaaaand snap! 

Every so often a stupid joke finds its way to me and I just have to share it with y’all, so here goes:

Do you know what 50 Cent did when he got hungry?

58.

Please don’t unfollow me … 

I’m thinking  this must be what happens when the cakes are too big for the pan.

These are just a few of the things going around the interwebs that I thought I might clear up …

Undocumented immigrants do not receive free healthcare; it’s against the law.

Tylenol does not cause autism.

Bad Bunny is an American citizen; the Slovenian Hooker is not.

And it’s the Gulf of Mexico.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk … now carry on …. 

David Pruhs, the Republican mayor of Fairbanks Alaska has conceded the race to Democrat Mindy O'Neall after this week’s election.

Republicans have controlled Fairbanks for nearly a decade  but Democrats have scored yet another unlikely victory in deep-red territory.

In around 40 special elections since Cankles barely won his second term, Democrats have overperformed by an average of about 15% and flipped a slew of seats.

This is the Resistance, this is hope.

Y’all know I can scarcely tolerate JLo—or as Carlos calls her, Jell-O—but this is too stupid even for this Thirst Quen. I mean, what in the name of Kindergarten Construction Paper Art Project Nonsense is this dress?

I mean, yeah, she’s starring in Kiss of the Spider Woman but this is the dress she chose for the premiere? It looks more like Kiss of the Broken Belt Buckle Woman.

Someone lay hands on her.

Emilio Alcaraz is a six-foot, one-inch tall, brown haired brown eyed Spanish model and that’s all I need to know because I adore the Latin mens, but … Would You Hit It?

Meme Dump