I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

That wacky Tara Reid. After last week’s post about her begging Nicole Kidman to co-star with her in some piece of schlock, she’s now trying to walk back the story.

Now Tara says she doesn’t “think” she pitched Nicole Kidman a job on Instagram. I think Tara should have stopped after saying, “I don’t think.” But now she’s crawled out from whatever fog she lives in to tell the “Access All Areas” radio show that she isn’t completely sure she was the one who left the message:

“I don’t think I did, because I think I’m not the only one who controls my Instagram. So, there’s a couple of people [who] do it. Do you know what I mean?”

Yeah, I’ve heard that, but I think you’d know what you posted and what your minion, AKA  the homeless guy who lives next door to the Starbucks dumpster on Highlands posted. But then Reid goes on to say that she isn’t sure she’s heard from Kidman yet:

“I haven’t read anything yet on private messages, so I don’t think so. So who knows?”

Oh honey, we all know.

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When last we heard about Erika [Jayne] Girardi’s split from 81-year-old husband Tom Girardi, we were told make it was a fake divorce to hide assets Tom was embezzling from a lawsuit, and how badly Erika needs all the coins she can grab because she’s expen$ive.

And it gets messier. The 49-year-old member of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills filed for divorce  a month ago, she and Tom have no children and there is no pre-nup. There were rumors of affairs, living separate lives, and major financial problems that stemmed from Tom’s many lawsuits, and then this:

Tom responded to Erika’s divorce filing a couple of weeks ago and requested to terminate the court’s ability to award spousal support to Erika and he demanded that she pay his attorney fees! Erika had requested spousal support in her original November 2nd filing, and also asked that the courts block Tom from requesting spousal support from her.

From her? What does she have exactly, other than some hooker heels, tons of hideous wigs and the most atrocious ALLEGEDLY couture wardrobe ever seen?

I am so ready for the next season of RHoBh because last season Erika, who shares little of her personal life on the show, was obsessed with getting Denise Richards to reveal every intimate detail of her life, including an ALLEGED with Brandi Glanville. 

Karma is a bitch, Erika, so let’s see how much you share of prenups and cheating and embezzling.

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Wendy Williams continues to make friends everywhere, with her latest target being living legend, Dionne Warwick. While talking about Warwick on her show, Wendy brought up an old marijuana charge against Dionne and said she thought Warwick might still be lighting up; Dionne then took to Twitter to demand that Wendy keep her name out of her mouth, but you know Williams.

She went back on TV and claims that Warwick hates her, but called her “a beautiful woman”, saying:

“She doesn’t like me though, I know she doesn’t like me. She’s been here. She’s a friend to the show. She’s a friend to the show ’cause she has something to promote and we’re the social influencers and she’s smart … But, once she gets off the show, you know she’s probably like, “Bitch.” It’s okay, Ms. Warwick, it’s okay.”

First off, Wendy, she’s one of many people who don’t like you; now, back to snark: Wendy claimed it’s Dionne’s niece, Brittani, who comes up with Dionne’s Tweets, and then suggested she does so because Dionne gets so high that she can’t work the social media. And that’s when she reminded everyone of that 2002 arrest where Dionne was caught with weed:

“I totally believe that she is doing her own tweeting, but I think that Brittani is her right hand. After Aunt Dionne does what she wants, after midnight, maybe after some bud… Well, you remember a few years ago, Aunt Dionne was stopped at the Miami airport trying to get back to Jersey and … TSA stopped Aunt Dionne and opened up a lipstick tube and found four, excuse me, 11 pre-rolled joints. Oh yeah … she’s still [smoking weed]. After midnight, a little bud, a little Chardonnay.”

Odd that Wendy, who has publicly had her own years and years of substance abuse issues, would sink that low. Well, not odd at all, because that’s Wendy Williams: low.

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Now, before y’all think I’ve lost my mind, this story is true: Saved By The Bell’s Mario Lopez will be playing … wait for it … Colonel Sanders, of KFC fame, in a movie for Lifetime.

I know! Luckily, it’s a 15-minute holiday romance murder movie called A Recipe for Seduction that centers around Colonel Harland Sanders as the main love interest in what they call a “Lifetime Original Mini-Movie Presented by Kentucky Fried Chicken.” The official synopsis on Lifetime’s website says:

“As the holidays near, an heiress [played by Bosch alum Justene Alpert] contends with the affections of a suitor handpicked by her mother. When the handsome chef arrives with his secret recipe and a dream, he sets in motion a series of events that unravel the mother’s plans.”

Secret recipe and a dream? Get ready for a slew of Finger Lickin’ Good jokes when the movie “premieres” December 13^th … at noon.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

We haven’t heard much about Kevin Spacey lately; at least not since he was outed as a sexual predator who preyed on men and young boys and then blamed it on being a homosexual.

So, here’s some new dish on Perv Spacey … he is set to be arraigned on a charge of indecent assault and battery at a Nantucket District Court just after the first of the year.

The ALLEGED victim in the case is the son of former Boston WCVB-TV news anchor Heather Unruh, who claims Spacey tried to rape her then-18-year-old son while he was working at The Club Car Restaurant on Nantucket in July 2016.

She says Spacey came in after the kid’s shift, hung out with the kid, bought the underage kid cocktails and asked the kid about his penis size and tried to get the kid into his room. Spacey also ALLEGEDLY reached into the kid’s pants and grabbed his genitals.

When Kevin went to the bathroom, a woman who saw it all, told the kid to run. The kid now says Spacey was trying to rape him and he has a video of Spacey grabbing his junk.

Oh Kevin, this has nothing to do with being gay but everything to do with being a sexual predator and a child molester. And I hope the book they throw at you hurts like hell … for 7-to-10 years .... or more.

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Lotsa Hot Topics about Wendy Williams having some sort of substance abuse issue, or self-medicating, or whatever, because lately, on her show, she has appeared out of it, slurring her words, and generally acting a little hooked on something other than herself.

Williams apologized  for slurring on TV, saying it was the fault of her painkillers which she’s taking for a fracture but maybe that wasn’t it; maybe it’s her husband’s mistress being pregnant with his child.

The source who spilled the tea believes Wendy might be self-medicating:

“[People] suspect she might be self-medicating [and the staff] is routinely having to adjust to her health issues—i.e. not walking out for the beginning of the show, zoning out during segments, etc. They’re really embarrassed about the whole situation.”

And so maybe all that drama lies at the feet of her husband, Kevin Hunter, who sidepiece is knocked up, and has knocked Wendy off balance.

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It’s like a Time Warp in gossip lately because there’s a lot of talk about Paris Hilton since she dumped her boyfriend and kept the $2 million dollar ring he gave her that she paid for.

Paris posted a photo to Instagram of her days running with the wild kids like Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan and cramming their drunk asses into a tiny sports car. And she captioned the photos like this:

“11 years anniversary today since the first coming of The Holy Trinity!”

Oh Paris, you added too many letters ... it’s the “Ho” Trinity. But, not stopping there, Paris is now claiming, more than a decade later, that Lohan spotted her and Britney out that night and inserted herself into their little duo:

“We were all at the Beverly Hills Hotel at the bungalows during an after-party and then Britney and I wanted to leave to go home. Then [Lindsay] started, like, chasing us and then squeezed in the car. And it was literally a two-seater SLR — you know, the sports car. She just, like, squeezed in and I didn’t want to humiliate her in front of all the paparazzi and be like ‘Get out of my car,’ so I was like, ‘Whatever.’”

Yeah, it really looks like that Paris. Why don’t you hit yourself on the head and wake up and realize it’s 2018 now and the idea of you and BritBrit and Lohan is actually nothing.

You’re over, Paris, no matter how hard you try.

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Oops. Is singer Dionne Warwick headed to jail?

It looks like it since Warwick ALLEGEDLY owes the IRS millions in coins after filing for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in 2013. She claims she cannot pay her tax bill because she’s got just $25,500 in assets to her name, but she owes a hair under $11,000,000, including some six-million to Uncle Sam.

How does one have 25K to their name and yet let their debts get to Eleven-effing-million-dollars?

Anyway, the case has dragged on for years because Dionne is suing the government to have her tax bill from 1990 through 2008 discharged; yes, she wants all of her tax debt for nearly two decades erased!

Good luck with that Dionne. Oh, and visiting days at San Quentin are Wednesdays and Fridays, you know, in case you need the info.

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It's Snarkurday!

So, earlier this week, former Happy Days and Joanie Loves Chachi star, Erin Moran died and Chachi himself, _____-supporter and all-around ass, Scott Baio basically said she deserved to die of an ALLEGED heroin overdose, because she had a drug and alcohol problem her whole life.

Actually, the problem was Moran died from cancer, but that didn’t stop Chachi from acting like a dick, and a tiny one, according to Moran’s brother, Tony Moran.

But first, once Baio learned the truth of Moran’s death, he went on Twitter to whine about how the Fake Media is making him the bad guy because he never knew Moran had cancer. Um, Scott, then shut your pie-hole if you don’t know what you’re talking about, m’kay?

But Tony Moran wasn’t having it, and went off on Baio on Twitter and Facebook:

“A special shout out to Scott Baio. I already went on Twitter about you. I hope it finds you. You and my lil sis had a very very brief fling. She dumped you. 2 reasons. 1. She told me that you were more like a lil girl and not a man. 2. She told me that you were tiny. Ya know. Barely a man in the man region. True story! Scott, I'd advise you to get on your knees and pray you never run into me.”

I say good on Tony for defending his sister and yet, even though that was good, he wasn’t finished with Baio after Baio’s wife, Renee came for Tony:

“Well guys. Guess what? I was contacted by Scott Baio's wife. His wife! Fucking coward! I've never met her. I do know the scumbag piece of shit Scott Baio tho. He was a piece of shit back then and still is. He had his wife contact me! Very apologetic and shit. Doesn't surprise me. It's too late you motherfucking pieces of shit! Go back under the rock you crawled out from under. There isn't one word I want to hear you speak. Makes me sick to my stomach.”

Here’s the deal: maybe Tony went a bit too far, but Scott Baio, and his wife, need to think before they speak, and not slam someone who has just died, because Erin Moran had a husband and a family she left behind and they don’t need Scott Baio’s tiny-dicked opinions about her.

No wonder he supported _____; tiny dicks stick together.

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Blake Lively is a fashionista; I mean, she went to Cannes last year with her husband, Ryan Reynolds—the best fashion accessory ever—and was photographed posing nearly every single day, and sometimes more than once a day, in a new outfit.

And she reveled in it, Tweeting the pictures, Instagramming the pictures. But, now, all of the sudden, Blake Lively doesn’t want to talk fashion even though she has had more fashion contracts than most A-list models: she’s been the face of Chanel handbags, Gucci and Michael Kors, for example.

When she was honored at Variety’s Power of Women event—Blake Lively? Power? Um, no—for getting a non-profit some time at a big conference she used the red carpet, where women wear great clothes and talk about them, to complain about being asked about her outfit:

“Really? At this event, you’re asking me about my outfit? Seriously…would you ask a man that? I’m here so we…become more aware, and that we change, and that we build (women up). So, you can ask me another question.” 

Had it been me asking the question, I would have been all:

“Um, okay ... why such a bitch, Blake? I mean, you’ve made a name for yourself by posing in fashion, being the face of fashion, and yet you don’t wanna talk about your fashion? Bye Felicia.”

Seriously, if Blake Lively weren’t Missus Ryan Reynolds she’d be asking me if I wanted my Starbucks for here or to-go.

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So, former Spice Girl Mel B and soon-to-be ex-husband, Stephen Belafonte’s divorce is really, really ugly. She has a pill problem ... ALLEGEDLY; he’s abusive ... ALLEGEDLY; he cheated on her with the nanny and got her pregnant and made Mel pay for an abortion ... ALLEGEDLY; she used to drug the nanny and force her into threesomes.

Not so ALLEGEDLY?

Yup ... Lorraine Gilles, the aforementioned nanny, filed a defamation lawsuit against Mel claiming that Scary Spice used to get her drunk and seduce her into group sex with her and the husband.  And, not to be outdone, Mel is counter-attacking that Stephen and Gilles are trying to blackmail her with sex tapes.

Gilles suit, though, is the best and dirtiest, because she claims to have had a sexual relationship with both Mel and Stephen over the last seven years.

Talk about spice, girl. Nanny sex; threesome sex; drunken sex.

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Another high profile divorce getting dirty is that of Mary J. Blige and Kendu Isaac.

Mary married Kendu Isaacs in 2003 and they split last year, when Mary filed for divorce and asked the court to deny his bid—$110,000 a month—for spousal support.

Since the pair have no children, the fight naturally turns to the coins, and Mary claims Kendu already spent any money he should get on his mistress ... who just happens to be Mary’s protégé, someone called Starshell, a much younger woman whom Blige took under her wing.

It’s ironic, all these old movies getting a reboot; Bradley Cooper is remaking A Star Is Born with Lady Gaga and Mary J. Blige is reliving All About Eve at home.

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You know you’re a drama queen when you have so much drama that it takes years to get through them all.

I’m looking at you, Aretha; Franklin, that is.

Aretha has finally gotten around to slamming her longtime rival Dionne Warwick for saying something nasty about her at Whitney Houston’s funeral ... five years ago. Best of all, Aretha slapped back at Dionne via a fax machine because the Queen don’t Twitter, text, or email.

The Associated Press spoke to Aretha on the phone after she sent them that fax to explain how furious, furious I tell ya, she was that, at Whitney’s funeral, Dionne tried to introduce Aretha to the funeral-goers but when she realized Aretha wasn’t there, Dionne said:

“‘Ree’s not here, but she is here. She loves Whitney as if she were born to her. She is her godmother.”

Aretha is mad because she is not Whitney’s godmother—that would be one Darlene Love—so why get her bloomers in a snit over that, especially a snit that boiled and bubbled for five years?

Aretha told the AP that she waited until now to say something because back then, there was too much drama going on, and so she waited, and plotted, and ate some pie. And then thought on it, and had some cake, and then put on a hat for Obama’s inauguration, and then thought on it some more until ... BAM ... it’s 2017 and she could tell the world:

“She blatantly lied on me … fully well knowing what she was doing."

And, in addition to waiting five years to spill the tea, Aretha is gonna wait even longer until she forgives Dionne. The two ran into one another at the Tribeca Film Festival premiere of the Clive Davis documentary last week, and went all Bette and Joan on one another:

Dionne said, “Give me a hug.”

Aretha said, “Oh hell no. You couldn’t be serious.”

And lest anyone think all Dionne needs to do is apologize, do not hold your breath:

“I don’t care about her apology, at this point it isn’t about an apology, it’s about libel. We’ve never been friends and I don’t think that Dionne has ever liked me.”

When the AP asked Dionne’s rep for a response he said:

“She will not dignify a response to the statement made by Aretha Franklin.”

I’m torn ... I could go Team Aretha and share some chicken with her, or I could go Team Dionne because she just made a stupid mistake.

Plus, if I go Team Dionne, it’ll take Aretha about five years to come for me.

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Almost two months have passed since Faye Dunaway’s frozen face screeched out the wrong film at the Oscars and she is still all kinds of bothered by it.

Faye did an interview with Lester Holt to promote her new movie, The Case for Christ, and she talked about the Best Picture mistake:

“It’s a moment I still have not recovered from. We had planned to come on stage, do some banter, see the film clips. Then Warren was supposed to open the envelope, and then for suspense, pass me the card to read the winner. We rehearsed the whole thing. What happened that night was Warren opened the envelope, took the card out and didn’t speak…I was trying to tell him, ‘Let’s get on with it.’ And I read the name of the film on the card. And it was the wrong name.”

Wait; you rehearsed that? Cuz the story coming from everyone else is that Faye and Warren scarcely spoke to one another at all, before, during, and after the debacle.

Faye adds that she felt “very guilty” and wonders why she didn’t see Emma Stone’s name on the top of the card.

Really Faye? That makes you feel guilty? Not The Eyes of Laura Mars? Not Mommie Dearest? Not your new face?

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Gosh, I was so on Team Caitlyn when she came out as transgender and then she started to speak and well, between the anti-marriage equality bull shiz and the _____ support, I quickly grew tired of her and her “Look at me!” antics. And those, apparently, are getting worse every day.

Caitlyn appeared on “Live with Kelly” this week and was, well, a Kardastrophe-esque-sized bitcunt.

Jenner, promoting her memoir, “The Secrets of My Life,” continuously cut off Kelly Ripa and guest co-host John Leguizamo. And, for some reason, she asked Kelly when she first identified as a female.

“Just think about that. When did you know you were a girl?”

Jenner then made Leguizamo her target, asking if he enjoyed dressing in drag in To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar.

Apparently she thinks she the poster gal for transgender people; she’s not. She’s a famewhore trying to sell a book and make some coins because her “career” on reality TV is done.

Worse of all is that Caitlyn didn’t even let the hosts ask questions; she asked herself the questions, and then answered them ...

 “I’m actually very excited to be here. Why? Because today, the 25th of April ... my book comes out and I don’t have a secret left in my life.”

Later on, Jenner again interrupted the hosts to whine about being snubbed by the program:

“I have been around for 40 years, from the old ‘Regis and Kathie Lee’ — Kathie Lee’s [Gifford] the godmother to some of my children — and all this kind of stuff. I’ve watched your show for years, I’ve seen you go through all this stuff, and I’ve never been asked to co-host.”

And, hon, you never will. The Caitlyn Jenner Show has been canceled.

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