I Didn't Say It

Lewis Hamilton, seven-time Formula One champion, blasting the anti-LGBTQ+ measures enacted by Florida lawmakers and ripped the state’s controversial “Don’t Say Gay” law with a reference to oppression seen in Saudi Arabia:

“It’s not good at all. I stand by those within the community here. I hope they continue to stand firm and push back. I’ll have the rainbow on my helmet. It’s no different to when we were in Saudi.”

Hamilton, F1’s only Black driver, regularly uses his platform to speak on issues of social justice and race, human rights and protection of the LBGTQ community and will wear the Pride emblem on his helmet during upcoming races.

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Candace Owens, conservative loon, on drag queens:

“Let’s say we do get dragged into World War III, or if you’re wondering where it is that our military stands. Well, the US Navy has platformed a drag queen influencer—I wish I was kidding. I’m not—to attract the youth because right now the military is facing a hiring crisis. That makes sense to me, obviously—you are encouraging men to act like women, and I don’t think that those men are necessarily going to want to sign up to fight overseas wars. But yes, this is a real headline. There is a drag queen influencer that is trying to engage Gen Z—sign up for the military because I’m a drag queen or something. Here he, who dresses up like a she, is in his own words. You know what my first reaction was? I could probably beat that guy up. I just—I feel like I could beat that guy up. I feel like if you had to put money on a fight between me and that guy that you just saw, you probably would put your money on me. And that should make you very upset because this guy is now recruiting people. Not only is he in the military, he’s recruiting other people to be in the military. And that doesn’t make me feel secure about the direction of the United States military.”

Oh Candy, you dumb bitch.

Apparently you don’t know LGBTQ+ history or you might have known that it was trans women and drag queens who started the march for equality for our community because they refused to back down any longer. But go ahead, do you, and think that because it might be what your bigoted narrow little mind calls a man in a dress that somehow makes him an easy target for dumb bitches …

Girl, bye.

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Marsha Blackburn, Tennessee’s follically challenged GOP Senator, on her “SAFE ACT” bill that would grant $900 million for schools to “harden security”:

“To have this grant pool and to allow local school systems and local law enforcement to work together to bring in veterans and retired law enforcement to serve as a security officer at a school—they know how to use weapons. They know how to deescalate situations. I’ve talked to a lot of them. They like this idea. They are grandparents like we are—my husband and I are grandparents—and they want to be there to help protect children.”

I’m sorry? She wants to spend $900M to have Meemaw and Peepaw park their walkers in the hallway and carry guns??

Marsha Marsha Marsha, you ignorant fool.

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Mitt Romney, on what he wished the verdict against Thing 45 would mean:

“I hope the jury of the American people reach the same conclusion about [Thing 45]. He just is not suited to be president of the United States and to be the person who we hold up to our children and the world as the leader of the free world. At some point when the people who work with you, your cabinet secretaries, and juries conclude that you’ve done something severely wrong, it’s time for us to recognize that the great majority of those who’ve worked with him are right and he’s wrong.”

Sadly, most of the GOP and many Republican voters think a sexual abuser is a good look for president.

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Mike Pompeo, former Secretary of State, has dropped out of the 2024 presidential race:

“We’re not going to join the race in 2024. We came to the conclusion that this wasn’t the moment for us.”

He could’a saved himself time and money and embarrassment if he’d just asked me because I always knew he would never be president of anything other than a homeowner’s association.

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Dan Andrews, premier of Victoria, Australia, on people who think like the Florida GOP having no place Down Under:

“This Americanization of our politics has no place here. My message to those people is, very clearly: if you want to behave like the worst elements of the Floridian Republican Party, get to Florida. Head over there, where your hateful views might be worth something. They are worth nothing here. We will not stand for this sort of ugly behavior. It is appalling, and I again make the point: it is not about free speech. This is hate speech plain and simple. It’s wrong. It is out of step with the values of fair-minded, decent mainstream Victorians. It is on the fringe. But enough about those people. Let us send the clearest message that equality is not negotiable. And despite the carrying-on and the shameful behavior of a small few, this government and this community remain committed to every single Victorian no matter who they are or who they love.”

Andrews was responding after a local library canceled its Drag Queen Story Time due to threats of violence against “families, the performer, councilors and staff” from people who think like Sunshine State Republicans.

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The Funny Papers

John Deering, Michael de Adder, Clay Bennett, David Horsey, Jack Ohman, Kevin Siers, Mike Luckovich, Ed Hall, Bill Bramhall, Drew Sheneman, Dave Whamond, Adam Zyglis, Deb Milbrath, Nick Anderson, Darrin Bell, 

Swamp Dwellers Mike and Susan Pompeo

Mike Pompeo is a homophobe who is pushing an anti-LGBTQ+ agenda that places religious freedoms over our community.

Yawn. I don’t care. Pompeo has used his alleged faith as a weapon forever and he’ll never change … until he dies and gets to Heaven and one of two things happens:

1] There is no Heaven and he realizes he’s been a dumbass his whole life, or …

B] There is a Heaven and upon his arrival God greets him and She tells him there no room for haters so he’ll be given a room downstairs.

So, since you can’t teach an old bigot new tricks, I don’t care. But … Mike Pompeo and his wife, Susan, with their high religious morals and beliefs, use State Department employees as maids and assistants ever since they came to Washington.

In fact, Susan Pompeo—from the Greek for Pompous Bitch, I believe—sent an email from her personal account—Lock her up—to Toni Porter, one of Mike Pompeo’s advisors, to ask that senior State Department staff members work during Christmas week to complete the Pompeo’s personal holiday cards. And because Susan knew this was all kinds of wrong, she also asked to keep the group small so the story wouldn’t get out:

“I see that you are out of the office all next week.  Do you know, is Joe also out? I’m wondering if we are sending the last of our personal cards out, who will be there to help me. Mike will not want to go outside you and Joe for this assistance.”

Porter forwarded the email to Lisa Kenna, executive secretary at the State Department, who volunteered to help write Christmas cards. Kenna warned Porter “about asking others for personal things.”

Swamp Dwellers Mike and Susan Pompeo feel that if you are a State Department employee you are also their beck-and-call men and women, who perform personals services for them on government time …which means We The People pay them.

Let me make this queer: our tax dollars are going to pay the salaries of qualified government employees to do the personal business for the Pompeo’s like picking up laundry, helping around the house and addressing holiday cards.

This is how the swamp works. And if you’re fine with it, with your tax dollars paying for it, you’re the problem.

If you’re not …

CAST A GODDAMNED VOTE.

The Old Mother Hubbard Lie

Remember last week when _____ played the role of Old Mother Hubbard and claimed when he went to the cupboard of PPE and medical supplies to combat COVID-19 that the cupboard had been left bare?

Well, Mother Hubbard has some ‘splaining to do, namely about this press release from the White House dated February 7, 2020:

This week the State Department has facilitated the transportation of nearly 17.8 tons of donated medical supplies to the Chinese people, including masks, gowns, gauze, respirators, and other vital materials.  These donations are a testament to the generosity of the American people.

Today, the United States government is announcing it is prepared to spend up to $100 million in existing funds to assist China and other impacted countries, both directly and through multilateral organizations, to contain and combat the novel coronavirus.  This commitment – along with the hundreds of millions generously donated by the American private sector – demonstrates strong U.S. leadership in response to the outbreak.

This assistance only adds to what the United States has done to strengthen health security programs around the world.  For the last 20 years, the United States through USAID has invested over one billion dollars to strengthen the capacity of more than 25 countries to prevent, detect, and respond to existing and emerging infectious disease threats.  

Since 2015, under our commitment to the Global Health Security Agenda (GHSA), this support has helped improve surveillance and laboratory systems, risk communication, outbreak response, and address the rising threat of anti-microbial resistance.

The United States is and will remain the world’s most generous donor. We encourage the rest of the world to match our commitment.  Working together, we can have a profound impact to contain this growing threat.

Yes, as the virus was just rearing its ugly head in America, _____ sent tons of equipment to China; as the virus was spreading he promised to spend $100 million in China to fight the battle.

He bragged in this press release about what the “United States has done to strengthen health security programs around the world” but he’d done nothing when the virus came a’caling.

When it came time to fight the virus on his home turf, he was left holding his limp, orange, mushroom-shaped dick in his hands.

That’s all; his own White House admits it.

US Department of State

The Funny Papers

RJ Matson, Pat Bagley, Michael de Adder, Darrin Bell, Matt Wuerker, Nick Anderson, Chris Britt, Jack Ohman, John Cole, Kevin Siers, Rick McKee, David Fitzsimmons

I Didn't Say It ...

Alexander Leon, an Australia-based writer and activist who works at the LGBTQ rights organization Kaleidoscope Trust, on what it means to grow up gay:

“Queer people don’t grow up as ourselves, we grow up playing a version of ourselves that sacrifices authenticity to minimize humiliation & prejudice. The massive task of our adult lives is to unpick which parts of ourselves are truly us & which parts we’ve created to protect us. It’s massive and existential and difficult, but I’m convinced that being confronted with the need for profound self-discovery so explicitly (and often early in life!) is a gift in disguise. We come out the other end wiser & truer to ourselves. Some cis/het people never get there. All of this is to say—be kind to yourself. Discovering who you really are is an enormous task it doesn’t happen overnight, nor does it happen without some hiccups along the way. Be patient, be compassionate, be vulnerable and exist loudly. And most of all –be proud!”

This went viral on social media because it truly breaks down what it means to grow up gay and be closeted and discover yourself and be happy.

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Seth Meyers, Late Night host, on Fox & Friend’s host Ainsley Earhardt flip-flopping on the FBI:

“_____ supporters are self-serving hypocrites who defend intelligence agencies when they want to bomb other countries but attack them when they investigate the president’s crimes [or] Earhardt has an evil twin.”

No, there’s just one Ainsley Earhardt, but she’s a flip-flopping, goose-stepping, Fox News lying hypocrite.

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Mike Pompeo, trying and failing miserably to explain what the “imminent threat” was that led to the killing of General Qassem Soleimani:

“We know what happened at the end of last year in December, ultimately leading to the death of an American. If you are looking for imminence, you need look no further than the days that led up to the strike.”

Gibberish. Lies. Excuses.

You murdered a man to take the eyes off impeachment and the fact your boss is an unhinged traitor.

Just like you are, Mike.

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Tucker Carlson, Fox News, criticizing _____’s assassination of Soleimani:

“Washington has wanted war with Iran for decades. They still want it now. Let’s hope they haven’t finally gotten it. What happened yesterday wasn’t just another symbolic bombing, it was a pivot point. Neocons in Washington understood that immediately. No one in Washington is in a mood for big-picture questions right now. Questions, the obvious ones like: Is Iran really the greatest threat we face? And who’s actually benefiting from this? And why are we continuing to ignore the decline of our own country in favor of jumping into another quagmire from which there is no obvious exit? By the way, if we’re still in Afghanistan 19 years, sad years later, what makes us think there’s a quick way out of Iran … ?”

Another Fox News goose-stepper changing their tune? I won’t hold my breath; it’s Tucker Carlson, after all.

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Andrew Napolitano, Fox News legal analyst on what the Democrats should do about impeaching _____ again:

“If I were a Democrat in the House, I would be moving to re-open the impeachment on the basis of the newly-acquired evidence, these new emails of people getting instructions directly from the president to hold up on the sending of the funds. That would justify holding the articles of impeachment, because there’s new evidence and perhaps new articles. If I were a Republican in the Senate, I would go about my business as if there had been no articles of impeachment. Because until those articles of impeachment come over to the Senate, there is nothing for the Senate to do.”

Well, not exactly true, because _____’s butt boys, Moscow Mitch and Leningrad Lindsey are trying to change the rules regarding the trial and not calling any witnesses.

Imagine a mob boss directing his own trial.

That’s _____ and the GOP-controlled Senate.

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Steve Schmidt, former GOP strategist, on Lindsey Graham:

“People always try to analyze Lindsey through the prism of the manifest inconsistencies that exist between things that he used to believe and what he’s doing now. The way to understand him is to look at what’s consistent. And essentially what he is in American politics is what, in the aquatic world, would be a pilot fish; a smaller fish that hovers about a larger predator, like a shark, living off its detritus. That’s Lindsey. And when he swam around the McCain, broadly viewed as a virtuous and good shark, Lindsey took on the patina of virtue. But wherever the apex shark is, you find the Lindsey fish hovering about, and _____ is the newest shark in the sea. Lindsey has a real draw to power—but he’s found it unattainable on his own merits.”

The most perfect description of goose-stepping Miss Lindsey that I’ve ever heard.

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Bobservations

This story makes me beam …

At the start of this New year, the Reverend Lawrence Richardson officially became the lead pastor at Linden Hills United Church of Christ in Minneapolis.

Nice, but he also became the first black transgender cleric in the state's history, and it was a long road for Richardson who struggled with poverty, homelessness and divorced parents battling addiction:

“In high school, I knew that I wasn't gay or straight, but I didn't have a word for it, [but] it was directly in opposition to the religious system that I inherited from my grandmother, so she was not as pleased with that identity. To be queer, to be black, to be trans, and to be homeless, there's not a lot of opportunities for people like that."

This year, after 26 years, the Reverend Eliot Howard stepped down, and after watching Richardson shine for the last five years, Howard decided Richardson was the man to lead the congregation.

You know, there are times when you feel the world is against you, that you have a hard road to walk, and then you hear these kinds of stories and, you just beam.

It does, and can, get better.

Here’s a story I heard on NPR over the weekend about Tim Gunn’s father and Vivian Vance.

The elder Gunn worked for the FBI and was, in fact, J. Edgar Hoover’s biographer with an office just down the hall. One day wee Tim Gunn and his younger sister were visiting their father, and he asked if they’d like to meet Vivian Vance, from TVs I Love Lucy. Vance was meeting with Hoover in his office so the two Gun offspring went in to meet her. They had a lovely chat and were then whisked away.

Years later, Tim Gunn, now of Project Runway, was writing a book and he included the Vance story. As the editors began fact-checking his Vivian Vance story, they found no proof that the actress had ever been to the FBI headquarters, or met Hoover. The editors contacted several writers who’d written biographies of Vance, and they also had no knowledge of Vance ever meeting Hoover.

Now, y’all know what that means …Hoover in a dress; or, as Gunn tells it:

“She was in a rather nice house dress.”

Except she was never there.

Typical government double-speak. After _____ ordered the murder of General Soleimani on Iranian sole, lapdog Secretary Of State Mike Pompeo says the murder made the US safe.

Even while they ordered Americans out of the area and sent in more troops and warships.

Doesn’t sound safe to me, it sounds, again, like this administration is out of control.

In a rare interview with CNN, The Notorious RBG, AKA Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, the 86-year-old four-time cancer survivor has resumed an active role in oral arguments at the Supreme Court.

It was just a year ago that RBG was recovering from lung cancer surgery and missed several weeks at the court. She finished out the term in June. Soon after, she discovered a cancerous tumor on her pancreas, which was treated in August, and then once again resumed her active schedule. She told CNN:

“I’m cancer free. That’s good.”

Don’t t**k with RBG. She’s back.

That twice-divorced adulterer who has told thousands of lies while in office, claimed Democrat Pete Buttigieg was “trying to pretend” he’s a Christian to stir up votes. _____ made the remarks while speaking conservative evangelical “Christians” who have questioned Buttigieg’s faith because he is a married gay man.

Pete, who has zero fucks to give about the #IMPOTUS, responded:

“I’m pretty sure I’ve been a believer longer than he’s been a Republican.”

Perfect response but let’s not forget the bigger picture: _____ is running on the idea that Pete Buttigieg, because he’s gay, is “less than,” and we are not taking that shit any more.

Especially from a pussy groping, porn star fucking rapist.

_____’s bitch … I kid … one of _____’s bitches, Nikki Haley says only Democrats care that the United States murdered an Iranian general on Iranian soil.

No, Nikki, people who don’t like murderers care; people that don’t like the idea that a draft dodger is pushing us toward war care; people who are sick of sycophants and ass-kissers and lapdogs and goose-steppers letting this traitor get away with literal murder because they don’t want to get on his bad side care.

Fuck off.

I featured Luke Evans before when a tall hunk of beefy gay man walks out of the water like this, it bears repeating:

Woof.