Friday, April 30, 2010
I Didn't Say It

Focus on Family head, Jim Daly, who replaced James Dobson, on gay marriage and how he doesn't think it's the end of the world as we know it:"I’m not fearful that change will happen in America. It will happen. I don’t know what will happen with same-sex marriage, but I’m not going to be discouraged if we lose some of those battles. It’s going to be difficult in this culture and the way the demographics are going right now. You look at the under-35 age group. I think it’s splitting 60-40 support for same-sex marriage....I will continue to defend traditional marriage, but I’m not going to demean human beings for the process."

Cyndi Lauper, on Lady Gaga:
"People forget how young she is. She is barely 24--much younger than I was when I became famous. It's very tough being where she is right now. People are pulling her in all different directions. It's hard to navigate that...I can't wait to see how she grows and what she decides her next act will be...When I see somebody like Gaga, I sit back in admiration. I'm inspired to pick up the torch again myself. I did an interview with her once, and she showed up with a sculpture on her head. I thought, How awesome...She isn't a pop act, she is a performance artist. She herself is the art. She is the sculpture."

Bad Hair Life, Donald Trump, on why he thinks fascism in Arizona is a good thing [sidenote: I wonder how many employees at his hotels and resorts and spas don't have "papers"]:
"Well it all starts with the federal government not coming out with a law. They've been talking about it for years and they still haven't done anything about it. And Arizona is really getting crime-ridden. There's people coming over, there's killings all over the place, there's shootings all over the place. What are you going to do? I mean, are you going to stop people to see if they're supposed to be there? And personally as a citizen I wouldn't mind, I really wouldn't mind."

Laura Bush, on how she asked her idiot husband not to make gay marriage an issue in the 2004 election--of course he didn't listen, he's a dumbass like that:
"In 2004 the social question that animated the campaign was gay marriage. Before the election season had unfolded, I had talked to George about not making gay marriage a significant issue. We have, I reminded him, a number of close friends who are gay or whose children are gay. But at that moment I could never have imagined what path this issue would take and where it would lead.”

Olympic Gold Medalist, and ALLEGED heterosexual, Evan Lysacek on Johnny Weir's complaint about not being asked to join the "Stars On Ice" tour:
"'Stars on Ice' is really selective of who they hire and they only hire the best of the best to skate. It would’ve been hard of them to justify hiring him, and I think he was really upset because he wanted the financial benefit of the tour. A lot of us in the skating world were really disappointed in the way he reacted, basically whining that he wasn’t chosen."

Outsports, on Evan Lysacek's statement about Johnny Weir:
"No Evan, Johnny wasn’t whining. He was reacting to perceived homophobia. But I guess you wouldn’t know anything about that, since you’re straight as an arrow. At least Evan left this little gem for us in the interview…
"'Last question: Are you seeing anyone?
I’m single. The reason, well…(laughs)…I’m limited to who I can see. I’m dating in L.A., but I just haven’t found the right girl.'"

Johnny Weir, on Evan Lysacek:
"He's a slore."

Molly Ringwald on why there were no gay characters in the John Hughes movies:
"Maybe it was just too soon and too controversial at the time, but from what I understand, John was a big Republican. I really didn’t know this back then, and maybe he wasn’t when I was working with him, but I guess he became one. Not to say that all Republicans are antigay, but historically, you know, that has to rub off a little bit, right?"

Not Home Schooled, But Home Teaching

Nancy Wants It Done This Year

Work it, Nancy. This is good news.
Yes, we do.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Mississippi Is Anti-Tuxedo......If You're A Lesbian

Pat Bertroche Is A Stupid Mother&$%#er

I'm surprised he didn't volunteer the same solution his obvious heroes used: tattoo some numbers on "them". Make "them" wear a colored triangle. Put "them" in a safe secure location, you know, a camp, or something.
Sorry Kids, You Don't Get Two Parents in Lose-iana

They don't get it in Louisiana. I'd hoped they would, but they just don't. They hear the word gay in any sentence and automatically shut down.
It's been scarcely a week since I wrote a post [HERE] about a Louisiana congressman, Juan LaFonta, and his proposed bill that would have allowed unmarried couples--straight OR gay--to jointly adopt a child, and allow an existing parent--straight OR gay--to petition a court to add a second adult--straight OR gay--as a legal parent. See, Louisiana? It wasn't about being gay, it was about adoption, and allowing those children to be adopted by both parents in an unmarried relationship.
But it's not gonna happen. The Senate Judiciary Committee voted a 3-1 rejection of the measure.
The debate pitted the Forum for Equality, a gay rights advocacy group, the ACLU, and other adoptive parents, including straight New Orleans City Council President Arnie Fielkow, against a long list of mostly religious interests: the Louisiana Family Forum, the Conference of Catholic Bishops and representatives of Louisiana Southern Baptists. Even wingnut, moron, asshat, Republican Governor Bobby Jindal opposed the bill to allow adoptive children the right to two parents.
Kelly Bryson of New Orleans had asked lawmakers to approve the bill so she and her partner, Erika Knott, can "complete our family." The couple gained custody of a Louisiana foster child, William, just before Hurricane Katrina, but only Knott was allowed to adopt the boy. When they moved to Maryland after the storm, Bryson successfully petitioned for a second parent adoption. Now, they are back in Louisiana, and Knott has again adopted; the boy is William's biological brother Jeremy. But with no change to the law, William has two legally recognized parents, while Jeremy has just one.
John Yeats, representing the not-quite-forward thinking Louisiana Baptist Convention, declared the bill a back-door attempt to legalize gay marriage, though the law pertains strictly to unmarried straight OR gay partnerships. He even went so far as to warn the law makers that "if we allow marriage to become a homosexual institution" society would lose words like "husband" and "wife" to designations like "partner" and "unmarried couple."
Oh, dear, we might lose words! The horror! As if that would happen. But, if it did, we'd always have asshat, just for you, John Yeats.
It was Republican--naturally--Senators Don Claitor, Jack Donahue, and Bob Kostelka who voted against the measure. Democratic Senator Ed Murray was the lone "yes" vote. Republican Chairwoman Julie Quinn did not vote, and two Democrats, Rob Marionneaux and Nick Gautreaux skipped the meeting altogether.
Bad enough for those who voted "no" on giving children the right to two parents, straight OR gay, but equally disgusting are those who either did not vote, or simply didn't show up.
Think Before You Boycott

Jody Beth, in Los Angeles, Twittered:
"Dear Arizona: If you don't change your immigration policy, I will have to stop drinking your enjoyable brand of iced tea."
"It is the drink of fascists."
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Another Asshat Crawls From The Slime
Well, Tim James wants to change all that.
He's a Republican [naturally] running for governor of Alabama, hoping that people there would prefer his brand of "common sense" over "political correctness". But his kind of common sense is the kind that don't take kindly to people that don't speak 'Murican English. See, Tim James wants the Alabama's driver's license exam to be be given only in English.
"This is Alabama; we speak English. If you want to live here, learn it."
That's the message of this asshat, wingut's ads that he has up and running on YouTube. The son of a former Alabama governor, Tim James promises to do away with the 12 foreign languages the test currently offers, saying he's only doing it to save the taxpayers money, saying, "[m]aybe it's the businessman in me."
Oh, honey, it's not the businessman in you, it's the white sheet on you.
Of course, what Tim "The Only Good 'Murican Is The English Talkin' 'Murican" doesn't seem to realize is that he won't be saving the taxpayers money with his racist viewpoint. In fact, Alabama could lose billions of dollars in federal transportation funding.
Ah, but who needs roads when you can run the funny talkers outta town?
For those of you who don't get it, this is what a racist looks like and talks like:
Tuxedo Says Boycott Arizona
A Tale Of Two McCains


Don't Piss Off Oscar

Tuesday, April 27, 2010
The Gay Marriage Tour

Illinois Steps Up

Blue-Eyed With A Soul

Artwork courtesy of Cubby
I'm a white guy; a very white guy. I am part Irish, part German, and, apparently, part cake flour, because I am really really white. And I have blue eyes. So, why do I care about what's going on in Arizona? I mean, I could travel freely throughout the state and never even think about being stopped. I'm American. I look American. a blue-eyed white boy.
But see, I happen to be in love with a brown-eyed Hispanic, who could get stopped and asked for his papers, because of those brown eyes, or because of his first name. Yes, and maybe because his features don't look blue-eyed and white.
That infuriates me. To stop someone and ask them to prove that they are allowed to walk the streets, drive the streets, or even live on the street, is not very American. That's not what I was taught in school. Of course, I also wasn't taught that America rounded up another group of people who didn't look American and tossed them in interment camps in World War II. Asian people got that history lesson first hand. For me, that hideous tale was swept under the rug
So, you think we would have learned....I mean, we've spent decades apologizing to Asian-Americans for what was done to them in the name of our [read: regular American] safety, and yet we're doing it again. We are persecuting a group of people because of their skin, or eyes, or accent, or hair, or name, or, yes, even their shoes.
Not right.
I understand the problem of illegal immigration. After living and working in Miami for a number of years I came to know many people who were here illegally, taking jobs away from regular, decent Americans; jobs like dishwasher, day laborer, gardener...the kinds of jobs all Americans deem less than their status. I met a girl from South America who worked as a busser in a restaurant; she was a pharmacist in her country and all she wanted was to make a better life for her family. Quite the step up; pharmacist to clearing tables.
I understand the problem of immigration, But you don't persecute and harass--and believe me, that will happen--a group of people because some of them might be here illegally. Solve the problem. Strengthen the borders. Take care of the illegals that are here now on a case by case basis. Will that take a while? Damn right it will, because we stood idly by and allowed 10-20 million people into the country illegally, and now we want to backtrack and send them all "home". But, guess what? This is home for many, who've come here, worked hard, paid taxes, and been upstanding citizens.
But that doesn't count in Arizona. in Arizona all that matters is that you look American. For me, I'm, safe, but I won't be travelling to Arizona any time soon. It's not Arizona that bothers me, it's the fascism that hurts.
And, thanks again to Cubby for his artwork. Folks in Arizona might not like it, but 70% of them foolishly voted for it.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Do These Nikes Make Me Look Mexican?

Sue Lowden: Asshat Of The Week
There's all kinds of funny in politics today.
Sarah Palin "I can see Russia from my house" funny.
Michele Bachmann saying, well, just about anything kind of funny.
Then there's idiot funny. So funny because it's outrageous and stupid and, well, here goes:
Sue Lowden is a Republican...naturally...Senate hopeful in Nevada who does not like the health care reform. Join the club, Sue; a lot of your fellow G-No-P'ers don't like it either, though they haven't come up with an alternative. At least you're thought of an alternative.
The chicken.
Or the goat.
Lowden is being mocked, and rightly so, for sticking to her assertion that we go back to the good old days, "before we all started having health care, in the olden days our grandparents, they would bring a chicken to the doctor, they would say I'll paint your house....I mean, that's the old days of what people would do to get health care with your doctors. Doctors are very sympathetic people. I'm not backing down from that system."
Now, a barter system is a good idea, for the most part. Two parties mutually agree to trade services rather than cash. But, um, Sue? How many houses would I have to paint for a round of chemo? How many chickens does an appendectomy cost? And, what about the doctor who doesn't take livestock? Can I sue him or her for malpractice?
Are you suing the shrink that called you competent? Just a thought, because, maybe your chicken bounced.
In response to Crazy Sue Lowden, the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee has set up a subsequently set up a Chickens for Checkups website offering a fake form letter in which people could offer items in exchange for health care.
And, what's funnier than Crazy Sue Lowden's "Chicken Health Care" is that she's not backing down. She's sticking to her guns. Lowden spokesperson Chrystal Feldman says, "Americans are struggling to pay for their health care, and in order to afford coverage we must explore all options available to drive costs down. Bartering with your doctor is not a new concept. There have been numerous reports as to how negotiating with your doctor is an option and doctors have gone on the record verifying this."
Sure, it might work. But, um, Sue? Where do I get the chicken?
Elton John: A Letter To Ryan White On The 20th Anniversary Of His Death

Most important, Ryan, you inspired awareness, which helped lead to lifesaving treatments. In 1990, four months after you died, Congress passed the Ryan White Care Act, which now provides more than $2 billion each year for AIDS medicine and treatment for half a million Americans. Today, countless people with HIV live long, productive lives.
Elton
Two Bitches: Corinne M. Schwab and Ashley N. Sams


Williams told police she was attacked as a result of her sexual orientation.
The Fall Of The GOP

Sunday, April 25, 2010
Saturday, April 24, 2010
I Ain't One To Gossip, But......

Almost.
The career is in the toilet. I mean, she hasn't made a movie since the 1960s when she did those "spy" movies with James Coburn. And the love life has tanked since she spurned her lesbian lover. So, what does Lindsay do now?
Oh yeah. She skips out on a deposition.
See, Lindsay is currently involved in a lawsuit filed against her by the three guys who claim she held them hostage in her SUV during that drug-fueled-wacked-out car chase back in Ought-Seven. But Lindsay has too much :::sniff sniff::: partying to do and has been skipping out on her appointments to be deposed.
I had hoped that was a misprint, and thought for one brief shining moment that she was to be deported. Alas, no.
Last week, Lindsay was supposed to answer questions, but cancelled it at the last minute. Something about a cocaine sale on on Kitson, I think.
She rescheduled, but then didn't show up again. Lindsay told her lawyer that she couldn't get a ride until after 11; she is on probation for a DUI conviction, as well as being a horrible actress, so she's not allowed to drive.
Well, the boy's lawyers are done playing the Where In The World Is Crackpot Lindsay Lohan and are planning to ask a judge to force her to answer their questions or automatically forfeit the case. Which means some of Lindsay's sizable drug money would have to go to these wholesome lads who were kidnapped by a crazed ex-movie star.
Sounds fair.

Those crazy kids over at CBS cannot come up with a fresh idea to save their lives. I mean, aren't there like 31 CSI shows on CBS now; add to that 14 NCIS shows, and The Eye is all about the lack of fresh thought.
Case in point:
CBS is attempting to do a version of The View, only they'll use a bunch of has-beens and never-weres who have all seen better days.
Julie Chen will be playing the role of Barbara Walters.
Sara Gilbert will be the token Lesbian.
Lisa Rinna will be this year's Star Jones.
Bethenny Frankel is their answer to Joy Behar.
Seriously.
Crash. And burn.

Mama Rose, er, Dina Lohan is all up in the media grill talking about Lindsay's rumored financial difficulties; lawsuits and drug buys cost money, y'all.
Dina says: “[Lindsay's] not going into credit card debt. Absolutely not. And her business managers… I actually am in contact with them every day....she has people that run what she does…So Lindsay doesn’t really pay her bills."
Yes, Mama, and therein lies the rub.
Lindsay.Doesn't.Pay.Her.Bills.
But then Dina goes on, and the more she talks, the bigger a dumbass picture she paints of the wacktress: Someone else [pays her bills], so they wouldn’t let her do that. And in the interim, you know, a bill may be a little late or not, you know, but that’s pretty normal....Lindsay isn’t in charge of her finances, other people are and we are keeping a close eye on the people who are managing her.”
Lindsay is just a little late with her payments. Yeah, I think One-Eyed Frankie, the crack dealer on La Cienega, won't take kindly to a late payment.
Then Dina confronts those on-going rumors about Lindsay and her partying: “People don’t understand how the press manipulates and how they make something look as it seems when it’s completely opposite. What you read in the press is completely fabricated. If a girl… any child… a girl in the business goes out one night, you’ll see magazines for the next two weeks and they’re wearing the same outfit. So it’s the same night!"
What frightens me is how much Dina calls Lindsay a child, a girl. This is a grown-ass woman who's been raking in the big bucks being some crazy-eyed movie star. She is no innocent lamb. All it takes is looking at one picture of Lindsay stumbling out of a club to know that Mama Dina is full of ...

I mean, I loves me some American Idol, but when the show ran long the other night, it pushed back the start of the Glee: The Power Of Madonna episode, which in turn made my DVR cut off the last couple of minutes of the show.
I ranted. I stomped. Carlos talked me off a ledge.
Others Tweeted.
Twitter apparently went nuclear with furious messages, especially once everyone rushed to the show's official website and found the only clip from the night posted was the Sue Sylvester Vogue music video.
I loved that one, but I wanted my Like A Prayer.
Dammit.
Word to the DVR set: Manual recording.
Problem solved, if FOX decides to eff things up again. Which would not be smart.
Don't deny a gay his Glee!
Ever!

But now a man has come forward to say that he is the Big O's daddy, and he's willing to take a DNA test to prove it.
But Big O, who would counsel her minions to follow through, ain't having it.
When was asked if she would participate in a paternity test to determine if Norm Robinson is her biological father, she said: "I will not be taking a paternity test, ever! I've never heard of him. I know who is claiming to be my real father."
Nice, O. Nice.
I mean, would it kill you? But then I think she's worried that Daddy might get too close to the vaults--the one with the money and the one with the cookies.

I say Me!!
They say Who??
But now Adam Lambert's name has been tossed into the mix alongside the likes of Neil Patrick Harris, Howard Stern, Perez :::gag::: Hilton, and, yes, Paula Abdul.
But apparently the producers liked how Lambert mentored the songtestants a couple of weeks back and he proved he has that bitchy, queeny, gay sensibility that Simon brings to the table.
An insider--a janitor, I think, says: “Producers were totally bowled over by Adam’s on-target critiques and pithy comments. They believe he’ll bring a fearless, youthful freshness to the show. And let’s not forget, Glambert’s got real stage presence.”
I think he'd be good, but he shouldn't do it.
There are better things for a gay to do.

It seems the former TJ Hooker-Dynasty-Melrose Place-Spin City hasbeen was ALLEGEDLY arrested for hit-and-run charges last weekend.
It seems that last Saturday night around 4AM someone heard a crash near the North Ranch Country Club in Westlake Village; they didn't think much of it, because they apparently waited until later in the day to call the police.
Deputies searched the area and found a knocked over 'No Parking' sign and obvious signs of a car that went up onto the curb and struck the sign. Deputies then confirmed that a black car had struck the sign.
The ALLEGED incident took place very near Heather's home, and deputies noticed a dented and bruised black BMW in Locklear's driveway. She was cited, questioned, and eventually released, but in Ventura country a hit-and-run citation is considered an "arrest."
Of course, this isn't the first time Heather has found herself in trouble with the law. Back in 2008 she was arrested for drunk driving in Santa Barbara after an Us Weekly editor called the police on her swerving and weaving.
Maybe she ought to take a page out of Lohan's book--who ever thought I'd say that--and stop driving all together.

Brooke is supposed to be furious over claims that Charlie ALLEGEDLY cheated on her with a lingerie model, but life is too good at Party Central for her to just up and go.
A source--the gardener, I think--says: “She has not moved out and she doesn’t want to move out. She’s furious and not talking to Charlie. They’ve had some crazy times together but this really hurt her.”
Brooke's brother, who knows a two-million-dollar-a-week-meal-ticket when his sister marries one, says Brooke is just "trying to be a good mother. [She] is doing well just now and just trying to cope.”
Coping in a mansion with servants and pools and tennis courts and limos is hard.
Poor Brooke.

Girl, she has a hard time speaking.
But,and this is where it gets good, she wants A Gay to cohost with her.
I'm dusting off my audition reel as we speak.
It seems that ABC is creating a daytime talk show for Spelling and a to-be-determined co-host, who would be sold into servitude as Tori's BFF!
Hmmm, rethink that dusting off of the reel thing.
But the network is looking for a “Will & Grace” vibe between Spelling and her slave, er, BFF, and might even turn the hunt for Tori's homo into yet another reality show for the "actress".
Yeah, put the reel back in the closet.