Bobservations

Carlos was talking about his former job working with the Hispanic community, the unhoused community, and the local schools to talk to kids about drugs and drinking and smoking.

Well, one day he and a few women on the staff went to a local middle school for an anti-drug program but before they got started there was a woman there selling faces creams for blotchy skin and under eye bags and tiny wrinkles and before you could, ‘Wait one damn minute,’ Carlos was slathered in creams and potions and lotions, none of which worked.

I asked him why he did it, and he said, wait for it, the ladies made him. Then I reminded him of that one word in the English language that might have saved him:

“No.”

“But you don’t know these women!”

Oh Carlos … and then he told me there was a picture of him covered in lotions and potions so I am on the hunt for that!

This Tuxedo Says is from August 2021:

"Once again Tuxedo has proven that, like his two Dads, he has zero fucks left to give to these anti-masker, anti-vaxxer loons."

And it wouldn’t be lost on Tuxedo to note that the MAGAts have no problem with ICEstapo masking up and murdering people and arresting children.

I forgot to mention that this month in my household is called Fuckuary as it is the month where my mother passed away February 17 2007; my Aunt Pam passed away February 14, 2009; my sister Jeri passed February 15, 2014; my father passed away February 1, 2024;  and while some of you may not count your pets as family, I do, and so ... The Great Tuxedo passed away February 15, 2023.

I don’t enjoy February Fuckuary.

A veritable who’s who of who’s that was the “celebrity” guest list for the premiere of Melanie’s “movie” at the Kennedy Center:

Daytime TV host has-been Dr. Phil; Dr. Mehmet Quack Oz; rapper Waka Flocka Flame; social media magician Pete Anthony Sciarrino III; Fox “News” host Maria Baritomo; Jordan Belfort, the serial fraudster. And then you have the people forced to show up lest Cankles go off like DUI hire Pete Hegseth; Second Lady Usha Vance’ Attorney General Pamela Jo  Bondi, FBI director Kash Patel; and heroin addict RFK Jr.

Sounds abysmal, doesn’t it?

I needed a palette cleanser after that last bit so here’s a photo of the flotation devices my neighbors have at their pool.

Keep in mind that the DOJ arrested journalists Don Lemon, Georgia Fort, Jamael Lydell Lundy and Trahern Jeen Crews; all people of color; all journalists covering a story.

Who has not been arrested by the DOJ are Jonathan Ross, who shot Nicole Good four times, once in the face, and ICEstapo agents Jesus Ochoa and Raymundo Gutierrez who shot Alex Pretti as he laid on the ground dying.

Down in Texas of all places Democrat Taylor Rehmet has flipped Texas Senate District 9 Blue, pulling off a major electoral upset in a district Cankles won by 17 points in 2024.

It’s coming … the Blue Wave!

Fox “News” host Bullshit Barbie AKA Kayleigh McEnany is pushing for Melanie to win an Academy Award for the documentary “Melanie: From Whore House to White House.”

In addition to seeing Melanie get an Oscar, McEnany claimed Melanie would outshine everyone in attendance at Hollywood’s most glamorous event:

“If she was to go, she would be the best dressed and the classiest dressed by a long shot.”

Bullshit, Barbie.

Damian Baugh  models for most of the top agencies when he isn’t foraging wild mushrooms for his mushroom business—seriously—and hoping to create his own fashion line, so with all that, Would You Hit It?

Architecture Wednesday: Jessica Chastain’s Gilded Age Manhattan Apartment

Once you enter the opulent lobby of the Osborne cooperative ... built between 1880 and 1885 ... you are transported back in time with its magnificent turn-of-the-century details … marble, mosaics, gilded surfaces and leaded glass, glistening carved wood details; the Tiffany glass was created by Louis Comfort Tiffany and is reputed to be Tiffany's first decorating job.

So, let’s head upstairs to 4B, the meticulously renovated crown jewel of the Osborne which has been renovated, updated and revived. The move-in ready four bedroom home’s Gilded Age details set the stage for a lifestyle of unparalleled luxury and sophistication. The sun-drenched living room has restored mahogany paneling, elaborately carved doorways and windows, and a very special bay window with Tiffany Studio-created leaded glass transoms. Additional details include plaster crown moldings, oak parquet floors, fourteen-foot ceilings, and one of five wood-burning fireplaces in the home. Adjacent, the parlor room evokes the grandeur of bygone days with a spectacular framed oak doorway with pocket doors and period hardware. Here is another of the five wood-burning fireplaces, this one with a more modern marble surround and wall treatment.

The living room, library and dining room all have raised and fielded paneling that accentuate the architectural beauty of the space including restored original wainscoting, pocket doors, leaded glass transoms, gorgeous oak flooring, original, restored plantation shutters, and much more.

The eat-in kitchen has a soaring fourteen-foot ceiling, a rolling ladder that’s both practical and a fun design element, plus a custom central island that provides a pop of color and functions as the kitchen’s main gathering space. Incredible storage is available in the custom quartersawn oak cabinets; top-of-the-line appliances are integrated with custom panels.

The en suite primary is a romantic space with another of the five wood-burning fireplaces and a wall of mirrored closets and a bespoke copper-soaking tub. The fully tiled bathroom includes a water closet, double sinks, walk-in shower and built-in vanity. Down the hallway are two additional bedrooms and full bathroom with large soaking tub. The sunny east-facing bedroom has a trio of windows with views to Carnegie Hall.

Apartment 4B has had an illustrious provenance, with previous tenants including Adam Guettel, composer for musical theater; Bobby Short, American cabaret singer and pianist: and Leonard Bernstein, iconic composer, conductor, and educator—a lineage perfect for the buyer who loves the aesthetic of Old Hollywood and the Gilded Age.

The Osborne is across from Carnegie Hall, one block to Central Park, proximate to Broadway theaters, the shops at Columbus Circle, scores of the best restaurants in the world and multiple subway and bus lines. Amenities include a newly renovated gym, building and bike storage, 24/7 doormen, resident building manager and a landscaped roof terrace with open city and Central Park views.

And for just $7.5M 

As always, click to emBIGGERate ...

Dwell

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