Friday, May 25, 2018

I Didn't Say It ...

Dan Patrick, Texas Republican Rightwingnut Lt. Governor, offering a reason for the shooting in Texas:

“We may have to look at the design of our schools moving forward and retrofitting schools that are already built. There are too many entrances and too many exits. There are not enough people to put a guard in every entrance or exit …. maybe we need to look at limiting the entrances and exits into our schools so that we can have law enforcement looking at the people who are coming.”

So, it’s never guns. It’s doors. It’s trench coats. It’s abortions.
No, it’s Texas, and it’s asshats.
Fred Guttenberg, father of Parkland victim Jaimee Guttenberg, on Patrick’s asshattery:

“I think those are the most idiotic comments I’ve ever heard regarding gun safety. Let me be clear, he should be removed from office for his failure to what to protect the citizens of Texas. To hear him continue to make the argument—after 10 people died in his state—that guns are not the issue is simply a crock.”

Hopefully more and more Americans are not buying what the GOP, the NRA-owned GOP, is spewing.
Martin a gay man who didn’t come out until he was 85, on it being his greatest regret:

“It’s tough to be an outsider. I regret being such a sissy. So nervous. So bloody shy. I left it till I was actually 85 years old to really basically come out. I’ve missed the boat as regards to finding a lovely partner, a soulmate that I could love, live with. If you ask me if you want to set up with another young guy, go ahead, do it. You’ve got it. You owe it to yourself. And to him.”

Welcome Out, Martin. And, naturally, you’ll accept our Coming Out Toaster Oven and copy of The Gay Agenda.
See, it doesn’t matter so much when you come out, it matters that you come out.
And you, sir, have helped a great many people by doing so. Thank you.
Donald Glover, on the rumor that his Star Wars character, the young Lando Calrissian, was sexually fluid:

“How can you not be pansexual in space? There’s so many things to have sex with. I’m serious. I didn’t think that was weird. Yeah, he’s coming on to everybody…It just didn’t seem that weird to me. It’s kind of like, the doors open. It’s like, no, only guys or girls. No, it’s anything. This thing is literally a blob. Are you a man or a woman? Like, who cares? Have a good time out here.”

And now you know!
PS He’s hot.
Oliver North, traitorous arms dealer, blaming school shootings on Ritalin and video games:

“If school shield had been in place in Santa Fe High School, far less likely that would have happened. The problem we’ve got is we’re trying like the dickens to fight the symptom without treating the disease. The disease in this case isn’t the 2nd amendment, the disease is youngsters who are steeped in a culture of violence, they’ve been drugged in many cases. Nearly of these perpetrators are male and they’re young teenagers in most cases. They’ve come through a culture where violence is commonplace. All we need to do is turn on the TV. Go to a movie. Many of these young boys have been on Ritalin since they were in kindergarten. Now I’m certainly not a doctor, I’m a Marine. But I can see those kinds of things happening.” 

He’s not a doctor, but he knows that Ritalin is the cause. But, um, Ollie? Traitor? Criminal? What about young girls on Ritalin? Why are they shootin’ up the schools?
Oh yeah, you’re a lying, pandering, NRA check cashing asshat.
Art Acevedo, Houston Police Chief, blaming elected officials for inaction on the state and federal level in response to repeated shootings at schools:

"Let me tell you, people at the state level and the federal level in too many places in our country are not doing anything other than offering prayers. We need to start using the ballot box and ballot initiatives to take the matters out of the hands of people that are doing nothing that are elected into the hands of the people to see that the will of the people in this country is actually carried out. I think that the American people, gun owners—the vast majority of which are pragmatic—actually support gun sense and gun reform in terms of keeping guns in the right hands, [but] if you have firearms in your home and you do not secure them and you don't secure them in a manner that can preclude someone from grabbing them and taking them and carrying out this carnage, [there] is a criminal liability that attaches. I believe that anyone that owns a firearm that doesn't secure it properly [and it] ends up in the wrong hands and used to kill innocent people, that that should carry some significant consequences. We need to think about that on the national level across this country."

Another voice of reason. Listen.
Sarah Paulson, my favorite actress—besides Meryl—on her relationship with Holland Taylor: 

“If anyone wants to spend any time thinking I’m strange for loving the most spectacular person on the planet, then that’s their problem. I’m doing just fine.”

Matt Bomer, My Husband in My Head, on the night during a preview of Broadway’s revival of The Boys In The Band, when the prop crew forgot to leave a towel for him during a shower scene:

“I had the choice to either do the rest of the 10-minute scene butt-naked, which would not have made any sense. Or, there’s like a glass partition, so I had to kind of coyly reach around and grab my tighty-whities and put them back on my soaking wet body, and then do the rest of the scene in wet tighty-whities.”

Okay, I’m’a just say that the crew didn’t 'forget,’ they wanted a chance for some Bomer Butt on Broadway and gave it their best shot.
I mean, it’s what I would have done.

Thursday, May 24, 2018


I wasn’t really into the Royal Wedding for a variety of reasons …

Pomp and Circumstance ain’t my thang.

It started way too early.

And, perhaps, most importantly … Bitch stole my man.

Now, I love Carlos to death, but I was kinda hoping I would be the Duchess of Sussex, with my Hot Prince Ginger at my side, though, to be completely honest, I’d have named myself the Duchess of SucksIt, cuz, you know.

But …Carlos could not get enough of it. He’d say he wasn’t really interested, but every chance he got he was glued to a TV watching it, and then watching the summary of it, and then the recap of it, and then the highlights of it.

But, you know, he wasn’t really interested.
Poor racist ranting New York lawyer Aaron Schlossberg. You know, the hate-spewing asshat caught on a cell phone video threatening to call ICE on restaurant workers for speaking Spanish:
“My next call is to ICE to have each one of them kicked out of my country. If they have the balls to come here and live off my money—I pay for their welfare, I pay for their ability to live here. The least they can do is speak English in what my country.”
Well, with his world crumbling down around him Aaron Schlossberg has apologized for being a racist ass:
“To the people I insulted, I apologize, seeing myself online opened my eyes — the manner in which I expressed myself is unacceptable and is not the person I am. I see my words and actions hurt people, and for that I am deeply sorry.
While people should be able to express themselves freely, they should do so calmly and respectfully. What the video did not convey is the real me, I am not racist. One of the reasons I moved to New York is precisely because of the remarkable diversity offered in this wonderful city.
I love this country and this city, in part because of immigrants and the diversity of cultures immigrants bring to this country. Again, my sincerest apologies to anyone and everyone I hurt.”
Um, Aaron, you are a racist; you spewed racist venom and were perfectly fine with it until your words were held against you and the only way out was to apologize.

Oh, and this isn’t your country, it’s our country.
Good trans news … a federal court has denied the Gloucester County School Board’s motion to dismiss a case brought by former student Gavin Grimm, holding that Title IX and the Constitution protect transgender students from being excluded from the common restrooms that align with their gender identity:
“The district court’s ruling vindicates what Gavin has been saying from the beginning. Federal law protects Gavin and other students who are transgender from being stigmatized and excluded from using the same common restrooms that other boys and girls use. These sorts of discriminatory policies do nothing to protect privacy and only serve to harm and humiliate transgender students.”
Gavin Grimm, above, had this reaction:
“I feel an incredible sense of relief. After fighting this policy since I was 15 years old, I finally have a court decision saying that what the Gloucester County School Board did to me was wrong and it was against the law. I was determined not to give up because I didn’t want any other student to have to suffer the same experience that I had to go through.”
The march goes on …
Another day, another Republican with an idiotic idea…

First came the ‘Don’t throw rocks in the ocean or else the seas will rise” asshattery. And that was followed by the “Too many doors in school kill students’ asshattery, and that was followed by the ‘Let’s not allow students wo wear trench coats to school” nonsense.

And now this, from Republican Congresswoman Diane Black of Tennessee who wants to crowdfund the proposed border wall the president repeatedly claimed Mexico would pay for.

Now we’re gonna GoFundMe the wall? Bitch, please. Black introduced legislation to establish a fund that allows Americans to donate to build the wall, which the _____ administration has estimated will cost around $20 billion. And she’ll give y’all the added perk of having your name, if you donate, put on a plaque on the wall:
“My husband and I are willing to write the first check to say, ‘we as Americans want to do what the president has said — we want to fund that wall.”
Black, who is running to be the next governor of Tennessee—seriously, Tennessee? —was asked about what happened to Mexico paying for the wall.
“Well, I would like for Mexico to pay for that and I’m not close enough to the administration to see what pressure they are putting on them.”
Diane? Take a seat you fool and pay attention: Mexico will not pay for a wall; a wall will not stop illegal immigration; American citizens who are stuck with the GOP Tax Scam, are not gonna throw more coins at the government for some stupid wall. Even with a goddamned plaque on it.

If you had any doubt that Fox News is the NRA news network, this might change your mind …
On the day of the shooting last week in Santa Fe, Texas, Fox Hack Tucker Carlson spent exactly 17 seconds … seconds … of his hour long show on the shooting.

The rest of the time he talked about robots, diapers and the royal wedding. 

‘Nuff said.
Someone needs to teach the Publix bakery … at least the one in Charleston … a little something about the English Language.

Cara Koscinski ordered a cake online from Publix for her son’s graduation from a “Christian-based home-schooling program” and wanted the words Summa Cum Laude iced onto it.

She then received an alert …an actual alert … from Publix saying the store won’t write “profanity” on their cakes. But she ordered it anyway and when it arrived it was, well cum-less, so Cara naturally took it to Facebook:
“Ok. I didn’t want to post but I cannot resist. I ordered Jacob’s graduation cake from Publix. A $70 cake!! He earned a 4.79 GPA. Publix refused to write the words Summa Cum Laude because I was using ‘profanity!’ They put three dashes instead of the word!
How utterly ridiculous and I will be speaking to a manager for a refund. Shame on you Publix for turning an innocent Latin phrase into a total embarrassment for having to explain to my son and others (including my 70-year-old mother) about this joke of a cake.”
Publix has apologized to Cara and removed the word “cum” from their banned list.

Ooh, now I have a cake to order.
The NRA has a new enemy … Dick’s Sporting Goods.

Dick’s was one company that announced it would be doing its part to decrease gun violence by refusing to sell “assault-style rifles” in its stores. They this announcement back in February, and now they have gone even further: the unsold rifles will not be returned to manufacturers — they will be destroyed instead:
“We are in the process of destroying all firearms and accessories that are no longer for sale as a result of our February 28th policy change… We are destroying the firearms in accordance with federal guidelines and regulations.”
And now the NRA is throwing a _____-sized tantrum, taking to Twitter to blast the company’s “business model”, which is a far more responsible response than anything the NRA has ever done after a mass shooting:
“@Dicks decision isn’t focusing on the actual problem, what it is doing is punishing law-abiding citizens. What a waste, and what a strange business model.”
I say, “What a great thing.” The NRA is not the least bit concerned with guns, gun control, responsible gun legislation, they are all about making money from selling guns.

Fuck ‘em.
This is still making me giggle … last Saturday _____ Tweeted out a Welcome home to his wife after her mystery hospital stay and, well, y’all know what happened:
“Great to have our incredible First Lady back home in the White House. Melanie is feeling and doing really well. Thank you for all of your prayers and best wishes.”
Melanie! As if she needed one more reason to loathe that Fat Bastard of a husband of hers. The tweet was quickly deleted and replaced with a new tweet with her name—in case you forgot, it’s Melania—spelled correctly.

But, maybe there was a good reason for Melanie… apparently some staffers actually compose Tweets for _____ to send out because he’s busy with his bath, or his Big Mac, or his hookers and porn stars, and so, in order to simulate the cadence and his speech, they often purposefully misspell words and forget punctuation. They overuse the exclamation point! They CAPITALIZE words for no reason.

They, you know, “dumb it down” so you’ll know it’s the president Tweeting.
Even though it looks like the summit between the Two Bad hair Dudes, _____ and Un, may not happen, that didn’t stop the White House from issuing a commemorative coin.

Why? Well, the White House is a hot mess, _____ is a foreign policy moron—think embassy in Jerusalem and dead children, while Ivanka smiled and took selfies—and think that his team feels he needs a win.

So, make a coin for an event that has not yet happened, and may never happen.
Justin Clynes. Hot male model; totally swoonworthy. There is nothing left to say except, Enjoy!

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

Architecture Wednesday: Wildcoast

Keep it simple.

A box with some windows perched high atop a hill that seems poised to take off.

This home, designed by FGR Architects, in Portsea, Australia, is not a huge home—about 3600 square feet—but was designed with the idea of creating a private home with glass walls and spectacular views. And so it was set upon the crest of a hill for the owners to enjoy the views of the beach of Portsea and yet offer a sense of seclusion.

It’s just a box, but a pretty fabulous one at that!

Click to emBIGGERate ...

JJ Watt Did A Good Thing, But It'd Be Better If He Didn't Have To

Like James Shaw Jr., who, after the shooting at that Waffle House in Tennessee, used social media to raise money to pay the hospital bills for the survivors, Houston Texans football player, JJ Watt has stepped up to help.

He has announced that he will pay for the funerals of the ten people killed at Santa Fe High School.

JJ Watt has been active in the Houston area community since being drafted by the Texans in 2011; he started a fundraiser last August hoping to raise $200,000 for those affected by Hurricane Harvey and ended up raising $37 million.

It’s great that he stepped up to raise money for hurricane victims, a tragedy that is utterly unavoidable, and it’s nice he’s paying for the funerals of those murdered at Santa Fe High School but …

That tragedy could have been avoided if this country demanded sensible and responsible gun legislation.

The United States is 4% of the world’s population and yet we have 42% of the worlds guns, a third of school shootings happen in this country and there have been seventeen school shootings between Parkland and Santa Fe.

It’s really nice that JJ Watt wants to step up and help, but wouldn’t it be nicer if he didn’t feel the need to do so? Wouldn’t it be nicer if we could protect our citizens?

Or, maybe we just want to spend all our money on funerals …

Monday, May 21, 2018

Arms Dealer Ollie North Calls Student Activists 'Terrorists'

Well, traitor, arms dealer, and spanking new president of the NRA wasted almost no time showing what an absolute ignorant asshatted douche he continues to be when he … wait for it, it’s the height of stupidity, seriously …  compared student-led protests against the National Rifle Association to the violent and racist attacks on the civil rights movement in the 1960s.

North called it "civil terrorism":
"This is the kind of thing that's never been seen against a civil rights organization in America. You go back to the terrible days of Jim Crow and those kinds of things—even there you didn’t have this kind of thing."
Seriously, he called the f**king NRA a civil rights organization. And he says his proof of the violence against the NRA lies in the vandalism at NRA lobbyist Chris Cox's home—Cox says his house was splashed with fake blood … twice …clearly much worse than the real blood splattered at a church in Charleston or a school in Florida or movie theater in Aurora r a concert in Las Vegas.

And yet the student-fueled #NeverAgain movement stresses the importance of civil, non-violent disobedience, but, as is the way with the NRA, the GOP, gun nuts and morons, they spin their own message and pin themselves with the “victim” tag … unlike the nearly 21,000 shootings in 2018 … the 5,208 people killed by guns in 2018 … the 9,000 Americans injured by guns.

Yet Oliver North claims the NRA is the victim. And North also accuses the gun control movement of going after "our bank accounts, our finances"—clearly up in arms that #NeverAgain activists put pressure on businesses to cut ties with the NRA, cutting the group’s power, which has resulted in several companies ending benefits programs to NRA members and other companies choosing to stop selling guns.

Um, yeah, Ollie, hitting y’all in the bank account, spurring boycotts against supporters of gun nuts, who care not a whit about the Second Amendment because their only concern is selling guns and pocketing coins in their pockets.

And, oddly enough, and Ollie fails to mention this, that student-led gun control movement, March for Our Lives, doesn’t even mention the NRA in their mission statement, but instead focus on expanding background checks for gun purchasers and other legislative reforms.

Ooh, sounds like terrorism … to Ollie “Arms Dealer” North.

Be Like Kelly