I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Many moons ago …many many moons ago … Vanessa Marcil played Gina Kincaid on the last two seasons of Beverly Hills, 90210 where she met her ex-fiancé-baby-daddy Brian Austin Green. And last month, because she clearly has nothing going on in her life, Marcil went on Instagram Live to talk about the “cattiness” on the set of the show that has been off the air for decades … specifically from Jennie Catty Garth who apparently told Marcil:

“Maybe it would help if you didn’t walk around like somebody who isn’t liked?”

And, as happens, Jennie and her BFF Tori Spelling also have nothing to do so they took their talk of Marcil to their podcast 9021OMG with Tori muttering:

“What the fuck does that mean? That doesn’t sound like something you would even say. I’m going to go on record that you didn’t say that… No matter how she phrases it, it has a negative connotation to it.”

Jennie chimed in to say that while it doesn’t sound like something she’d have said when she was younger, it is “sound advice”:

“To her point, from what I sort of gleaned… she was in a bad place in her personal life, in her development. Like she was in that place where she took everything too personally”

Isn’t it funny that the girls accused of being catty bitches in the late 90s acted all catty about it in 2021?

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A couple of years ago, at the height of the #MeToo movement, Sharon Stone laughed out loud when asked if she had ever experienced sexual harassment in the film, and now she has a memoir, The Beauty of Living Twice, coming out, and in it, she talks about all the sexist crap she faced while working in Hollywood.

Of course, we know the legend of Stone and that Basic Instinct coochie-flash. She says she was never told that her vagina would be making a cameo, and that it was simply going to be implied that she wasn’t wearing underwear—she was told to remove her own underwear because they were reflecting the light—and that first time she saw the scene, vagina and all, was in “a room full of [male] agents and lawyers, most of whom had nothing to do with the project”:

“That was how I saw my vagina-shot for the first time, long after I’d been told, ‘We can’t see anything—I just need you to remove your panties, as the white is reflecting the light, so we know you have panties on.’ Yes, there have been many points of view on this topic, but since I’m the one with the vagina in question, let me say: The other points of view are bullshit.”

After the scene was screened, Sharon slapped director Paul Verhoeven, and immediately called her lawyer, Marty Singer who said she could sue and keep the film from being released:

“Marty told me that they could not release this film as it was. That I could get an injunction. First, at that time, this would give the film an X rating. Remember, this was 1992, not now, when we see erect penises on Netflix. And, Marty said, per the Screen Actors Guild … it wasn’t legal to shoot up my dress in this fashion … Then I thought … What if I were the director? What if I had gotten that shot? What if I had gotten it on purpose? Or by accident? What if it just existed? That was a lot to think about. I knew what film I was doing. For heaven’s sake, I fought for that part, and all that time, only this director had stood up for me. I had to find some way to become objective.”

After giving it some thought, Sharon decided not to fight it because “it was correct for the film and for the character; and because, after all, I did it.”

But Stone also dishes about an unnamed producer who suggested she literally fuck her co-star to make their on-screen chemistry better. For that unnamed film, Stone had actor approval, but nobody cared about that, and the producer hired an actor who bombed his screentest. Then, instead of finding a better actor, the producer put it on Sharon to fuck a better performance out of him:

“I had a producer bring me to his office, where he … explained to me why I should fuck my costar so that we could have onscreen chemistry … [I thought] You guys insisted on this actor when he couldn’t get one whole scene out in the test … Now you think if I fuck him, he will become a fine actor? Nobody’s that good in bed. I felt they could have just hired a costar with talent, someone who could deliver a scene and remember his lines. I also felt they could fuck him themselves and leave me out of it.”

I love her.

So, who is this sleazy producer? Well, it might just be the late Robert Evans who produced Sliver in which Sharon co-starred with the immensely talented[?] Billy Baldwin. I am waiting for this book to come out and I will read it with wine and popcorn and love every minute of it.

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Johnny Depp hasn’t had a great year , you know, between trying to appeal a UK court’s ruling that The Sun could legally refer to him as a “wife beater” … and preparing to go Round 2 3 4 5 Whatever with ex-wife Amber Heard in yet another defamation lawsuit trial … and wondering what happened to his film career. But then add in the two, count ‘em, two times in the last three months that someone has broken into Depp’s homes and you can see he is not having a good time.

Last January, a woman was found inside Depp’s Hollywood Hills home; nothing was stolen, and she was arrested a few homes down, and is ALLEGEDLY to other break-ins in the area. But then last week a man was found breaking inside the house.

Police were called to the Depp’s home by a neighbor who spotted an apparently homeless man hanging his backyard near the pool. The neighbor confronted the man, who took off and hopped a gate, which actually got him closer to Depp’s house. The police were called again, this time by Depp’s security team, alerting them someone was inside the home, and when officers arrived they found the man having a cocktail and taking a shower , and refusing to come out; officers had to kick the door down to arrest him.

Wait, a homeless looking guy drinking in Depp’s house and acting the fool? And it wasn’t Depp? Are they sure?

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After Alex Trebek passed away, Jeopardy! has enlisted a string of guest hosts—like Ken Jennings, Aaron Rodgers, Mayim Bialik, and Katie Couric—but when producers announced that Dr. Oz would be taking a turn at Alex’s podium, over 500 past Jeopardy! signed an open letter to producers calling the move “a slap in the face to all involved.” Here’s an excerpt of the letter:

“We understand that first and foremost, Jeopardy! is a television show, and ratings are important. However, Dr. Oz stands in opposition to everything that Jeopardy! stands for. Jeopardy! is a show that values facts and knowledge. Throughout his nearly two decades on television [Oz] has used his authority as a doctor to push harmful ideas onto the American public, in stark contrast with his oath to first do no harm. These ideas include promoting supplements that do nothing, legitimizing gay conversion therapy (which is banned in California, as well as 19 other states), dangerous “cures” for autism, and, most recently, the use of hydroxychloroquine as a treatment for COVID-19. None of these things is backed by any scientific fact and by promoting them he is actively putting his viewers in danger. In fact, his ideas are so dangerous that thousands of his colleagues have petitioned to have him fired from his position at Columbia Medical School. And what kind of message does this send to the LGBTQ+ and autistic contestants and viewers of Jeopardy!?”

Sadly, hottie Mike Richards, executive producer, kind of just shrugged and let a man who went on Fox News last year and said schools should reopen because the mortality rate among children was only 2 to 3 percent, which, to an ALLEGED doctor is a suitable number of kids dying.

Hopefully, when Oz’s turn is done, someone drops a house on him—see what I did there—and he never returns.

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I Didn't Say It ...

Chasten Buttigieg, Pete’s husband, on Melanie _____’s RNC speech:

“When you have that platform and you are still outwardly racist and xenophobic, and you cheerlead policies and decisions that hurt other Americans, I think it is worth paying attention to. You’re the president’s No. 1. You’re there at the end of the day. You can encourage, cheerlead, and you can also guide … As their partner, you have an opportunity and responsibility to speak up. It was particularly confusing when Melania was talking about this vision of America that is against bullying and people coming together. I was like, ‘What are you talking about? You’re cheerleading one of most destructive, openly hateful presidents in American history.’ I was excited at the opportunity of being [First Gentleman] because it felt like I could be a beacon of hope, to do good things with that office, and restore dignity and respect to that institution. That office also comes with a weight and responsibility, and I think Jill Biden will do an extraordinarily good job of cleaning up shop.”

After Melanie, Jill Biden will be a remarkable First Lady because there’s heart and soul and compassion and empathy and intelligence there.

But Chasten would have been a good First gentleman, too.

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Barry Moore, GOP nominee in Alabama’s 2nd Congressional District race, calling the arrest of the white terrorist who shot protestors in Kenosha “tragic”:

“It’s just indicative of what we’re seeing in the nation. You say defund the police, we’ll police ourselves. And when people and communities start trying to protect their property, their life and their liberty, and when they fire back, then all of the sudden they’re villainized.”

So, you confused fuckmonkey, how did this terrorist police himself when he armed himself and drove across state lines to kill people for sport. He’s a murderer and you condone it.

Sidenote: in 2014 police arrested Moore on multiple felony charges involving perjury and making false statements as part of an ongoing investigation into public corruption in Alabama, so, yeah, he’s one to talk. That’s his mug shot.

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Ted Wheeler, mayor of Portland, Oregon, blasting _____ after a caravan of _____ supporters descended on the city to incite violence amid Black Lives Matter protests:

“Do you seriously wonder, Mr. President, why this is the first time in decades that America has seen this level of violence? It’s you who have created the hate and the division. It’s you who have not found a way to say the names of Black people killed by police officers even as people in law enforcement have. And it’s you who claimed that White supremacists are good people. Your campaign of fear is as anti-democratic as anything you’ve done to create hate and vitriol in our beautiful country.”

He accepts no responsibility for the ills of America, even after saying, ”I, alone, can fix it.” Everything is either the last president’s fault …or the next president’s fault.

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Sharon Stone, blasted “non-mask wearers” and _____ after her sister, who has lupus, and her brother-in-law are hospitalized in Montana for COVID-19:

“My sister Kelly, who already has lupus, now has COVID-19 … One of you Non-Mask wearers did this ... Wear a mask! For yourself and others. Please. I want to talk to you about compassionate integrity versus politics and greed. The nurses in the hospital that are taking care of them … can’t get tested because they don’t have tests to test them with. Those nurses are risking their lives and can’t get tested … When they say there are tests for everyone, they are LYING. When they say there are tests even for the nurses in the hospitals, they are LYING. People are dying and fighting for their lives because there is nothing but lies. And because the people at the governor’s houses, the people at health departments are simply so overwhelmed, they’re not answering the phones. They are hanging up. Not returning calls. This is the state that we’re in. The ONLY thing that’s going to change this is if you VOTE. And if you vote for Biden. And if you vote for Kamala Harris. And the reason that’s going to happen is because with women in power we will fight for our families. We will fight for people to live. And we will fight for people to get tested. Because the only countries that are doing well with COVID are the ones that have women in leadership. Please vote. And please, whatever you do, don’t vote for a killer.”

Don’t.Vote.For.A.Killer.

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Rick Snyder, former GOP governor of Michigan endorsing Joe Biden for President:

“For years, I mentioned in most of my speeches the need to bring back civility to our nation. We will not continue to be the greatest nation in the world if we can’t get along among ourselves. We have only become more divided over the past four years. We need a leader who believes in civility and bringing Americans closer together.  While I am endorsing Joe Biden for president, I am still a Republican who also will be publicly supporting Republican candidates at the local, state and federal level.”

Personally, since many I the GOP will goose-step along with ______, Snyder’s decision to vote GOP down ballot is maddening. This party must be ended, and then, like the police, defunded and reformed into something less divisive and hate filled.

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Darin Zanyar, Swedish pop singer-songwriter, coming out as gay:

“Everyone in the world should be able to be proud and accepted for who they are. I know how difficult it can be. Took me a while, but I am proud to be gay. Happy pride!”

Welcome out Darin. And please accept as out gift, from HOMO HQ, a copy of the Gay Agenda, and a $25 IKEA gift card.

Welcome out.

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It's Snarkurday!

If Ryan Murphy needs a storyline for season two of Feud — after season one’s epic Davis v Crawford howl-a-palooza — he need look no further than the feud brewing between Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber [ALW] and Nicole Sherzinger.

And I get first dibs on casting: Arianna Grande will play Sherzinger and Lloyd Webber will be portrayed by Grumpy Cat. Cat? Get it …

When ALW’s Cats revival opened in London in 2014 Sherzinger was cast as the glamour cat Grizabella and, at that time, ALW was over the moon about her performance, saying Nicole’s version of “Memory” was the greatest recording of his music ever … besting that of original Grizabella, Betty Buckley, that of Barbra Streisand, and that of the ex-missus ALW, Sarah Brightman.

It was then announced that Sherzinger would bring her Grizabella to Broadway but, quicker than you can say ‘Fire Patti LuPone and get me Glenn Close,’ Sherzinger was no longer part of the NYC reboot; a rep for the show said the casting for Grizabella would be announced later. But then ALW threw some kitty litter at Nicole: 

“A week before we were due to go into rehearsal for Cats on Broadway … she calls me and says she’s decided she wants to do X Factor, having agreed to everything. I mean, she’s crazy. But the American producers just took a view, ‘Well, fine, we’ll get somebody else’, because she’s actually not very well known in America, amazingly. … I’m furious because … I went out on a limb to get her … and it makes me look like an absolute twat … But never mind, there’ll be another girl on Broadway and Nicole will not get her Tony award.”

I was kinda hoping Sherzinger would sharpen her claws and dig into some pasty ALW flesh, but instead she said her contract to do Broadway was never finalized and they just couldn’t make it work and she hopes to work with Andrew again and  Blibetty Blah Blay Blue where’s my catfight!?!

I mean all I got out of this was ALW calling himself a twat and that is just not enough!

I’m no Beyoncé fan because Beyoncé is all about making coins no matter what. I mean, when the stories started about her husband being a massive cheater she stayed quiet until she found a way — Lemonade — to make some dollars off the story.

And now this … the British tabloid The Sun has revealed that the workers manufacturing Beyoncé’s new athletic line Ivy Park work up to 60 hours a week and earn $6.17 per day.

Uh huh; while Beyoncé pockets millions. The Sun reports that Ivy Park, Beyoncé’s collaboration with Top Shop is being produced in inhumane conditions at the MAS Holdings factory in Sri Lanka. And Beyoncé says the line was created to inspire and support women … as long as it’s just six bucks a day worth of support.

The brand — AKA Beyoncé — has responded to ALLEGATIONS saying:

“Ivy Park has a rigorous ethical trading program. We are proud of our sustained efforts in terms of factory inspections and audits, and our teams worldwide work very closely with our suppliers and their factories to ensure compliance.”

As for the low wages, the MAS factory — which also produces apparel for Speedo, Nike, Lululemon, and Patagonia — pays workers more than double the Sri Lankan minimum wage but at six bucks a day most of the women making Beyoncé’s fashion cannot afford to buy any.

But hey, Bey’s making coins so, yeah ….

So, Mariah Carey was the centerpiece of ­NBCUniversal’s upfronts last week about their new shows — like Mimi’s “reality” show Mariah’s World — and, true to form, the diva was, well, diva’d beyond belief.

After tripping on the curb in her platform shoes and sequined zebra-print mini dress and fishnets — I swear, hookers dress classier — Mimi was literally carried onstage on a chaise by two men.

In addition, she arrived with a huge entourage of hair people and makeup folks and fashion stylists and hoisters — that’s what you call the poor unfortunate souls who lift Mimi off the ground — and various hangers-on. And while she didn’t topple over after that first time, Mariah had her team of spacklers and airbrushers touch her up more than six times during a five minute interview.

After the interview, Mariah changed into a skintight sequined bathing suit and once again had two men, this time with their shirts off so one could see their muscles straining — carry her to the stage.

In a past concert rider, Mimi famously insisted that she “doesn’t do stairs.”

Then, before performing, Mimi, who usually sleeps until 3PM, wished everyone a good morning and said she was there to wake them up.

It was 12:45 PM.

I’m not sure what Cara Delevingne is known for … acting? Modeling? A Taylor Swift BFF? Or being a diva of Carey-esque proportions.

Recently Delevingne was detained by security after cussing out train staff. She was about to board a Eurostar train traveling from London to Paris for her sister’s birthday when a security officer pulled her bag for a random search.

Cara wasn’t feeling a search of her luggage — did she go all Reese ‘Do you know who I am?' Witherspoon? — and ALLEGEDLY flipped out on the security officer with a slew of verbal assaults of the four-letter kind. When another security officer came over to try to calm her down, she went after them too.

So, Cara took a time-out from her tantrum and pulled out her cellphone which is a train security no-no. When she was told to put it away, she screamed “F**k you” at the officer who continued searching her bags, presumably looking for Cara’s manners. And when she realized her freak-out was doing no one any good at all, Cara got down on her knees and put her hands together as if she was praying for the whole thing to be over.

Alas, it was not; the diva actress-model-hanger-on-b*tch was then taken into an interrogation room and detained for an hour, after which she was released, red-eyed from crying and suddenly all apologetic.

Oh, and she was also slapped … with a fine for verbal assault.

Seriously. She should’a gone all Reese on their asses, or at the very least summoned Swifty’s Posse to come to her aid.

Sharon Stone usually goes to Cannes every year to host — and by host I mean collect a check for doing a meet-and-greet — a party for luxury jeweler de Grisogono’s swanky party at the Hôtel du Cap-Eden-Roc.

But this year Sharon demanded a lot of perks to host, like a check for $300,000, eight separate rooms at the Hôtel du Cap-Eden-Roc for the week and a private jet to whisk her to and from Cannes.

Sadly, times aren’t what they used to be for Sharon and de Grisogono turned down her request and got another “celebrity” to host their event.

Kim Kardastrophe. And all she got for her troubles was a pair of earrings … that she got to wear but then had to return. Bam.

Over there at House of Cards, Robin Wright wasn’t exactly pleased that she was paid less to star in the show than Kevin Spacey even though their roles are as equally as important. So she demanded a huge raise … or else. And the powers that be buckled.

I was feeling all “Good for her,” until I learned that Spacey pockets $500,000 an episode while Wright gets $420,000 an episode.

Yeah, that’s not exactly a huge pay gap … Wright makes about $60,000 a day and if she worked all 24 hours in a day that comes out to $2,500 an hour so … still, if the producers cut some of the budget for Spacey’s rugs and hair glue, they could cough up extra coins for Robin.

So last week Chris Brown and his friends were Cara Delevingne ‘d, er, thrown off a private jet bound for Cannes after the pilot complained that the cabin reeked of weed.

According to a police report, the pilot warned the Brown Crowd not to smoke on the plane but apparently the pilot didn’t know this was Chris Brown who doesn’t follow rules set by anyone. So the Brown crowd went ahead and ALLEGEDLY stank up the joint and so the pilot, while stopped in Miami, called police who told everyone to get off the plane.

Chris Brown is saying the story is nothing but hot … pot … air and, right after arriving in Cannes, on a different plane, released a statement:

“Cannes, we are here. We’re gonna party up. Turn up tonight, I can’t wait. Seen something on TMZ talking about we got escorted off a plane? How the hell we in Cannes if we got escorted off a plane? One. Marijuana smoke on the plane? I think we kinda learned that lesson. I don’t think we really need drugs on the plane. But you probably should check with the pilot, because he definitely kept asking my homies for an 8-ball. And we definitely don’t sell drugs. So, Imma be rich, stay rich, and happy.”

Yeah, he doesn’t sound high at all; and he maintains they never got bounced from the plane despite a police report to the contrary.

Like I said … high. 

Random Musings

Ethan Couch, the so-called “Affluenza Teen,” who murdered four people driving drunk and was subsequently sentenced to probation  for that crime, will now spend the next two years in adult prison for violating his probation.

Judge Wayne Salvant: “You’re not getting out of jail today.”

And perhaps not for 720 days. And Ethan’s idiot mother, Tonya, who helped him flee Texas after video surfaced that seemed to show Couch drinking alcohol, is facing 10 years in prison if convicted.

I’m liking that …

Okay, so ABCs Once Upon A Time is a Hot Bed of Hot Men — I’m liking that visual — and last week was no exception as they introduced Wes Brown, top ... I think ... as Gaston, from Beauty and the Beast. He is definitely a beauty.

Then we watched Ricki and the Flash, starring Meryl Streep, a rather formulaic film about a mother — Streep — who abandons her children to pursue her career as a musician, and then has all kinds of troubles trying to reconnect. It was bearable for a few reasons:

Meryl Streep, of course

A joke made by Meryl’s character when she was asked at a wedding by someone who didn’t know she was the groom’s mother, how she knew the groom, and she replied: “Caesarean section.”

And, it was made hot by both Sebastian Stan — bottom left and openly hot — and Nick Westrate — bottom right and openly gay and openly hot — as her sons.

Yum.

Following Bruce Springsteen's lead — he cancelled a North Carolina concert in protest of that state’s hate bill — Bryan Adams has canceled a show in Mississippi to protest that state’s passing of what has been described as the most aggressive anti-LGBT law in America.

And then quoting the Beatles classic All You Need Is Love, Ringo Starr cancelled his June 18th concert in Cary, North Carolina, and vowed to fight “against the bigotry of HB2.”

Add Sharon Stone to the list, because she was set to film a movie in Mississippi but she and the producers decided to move filming to a less hate-filled area of the country … most likely not the South.

While it seems certain that Donald [t]Rump will win the GOP primary in New York, there are at least two people who will not get his vote: his children Ivanka and Eric.

The kids have never registered to vote in the state’s closed primary and [t]Rump says they missed the deadline to vote for Daddy because they were unaware of the rules.

Look, if my father was running for president the first thing I would do, if I had never registered to vote and I was in my thirties, would be to get downtown and register my ass to vote.

But [t]Rump kids don’t need politics because they have Daddy's cash.

Planting Peace has done it again with a new sign welcoming visitors to North Carolina in light of their recent legalization of Hate.

Also, on Ivanka. I like her, I do; she seems kinda level-headed and smart but then she said, of her father’s penchant for being anti-women, how he gave her a chance to prove herself in business just like her brothers.

Yeah, I remember the years Ivanka [t]Rump spent as a maid at a [t]Rump property, or worked in the mailroom at a [t]Rump enterprise.

Look, she’s smart; she went to business school; but when she got out Daddy gave her a job. She never really worked for it and for her to suggest that means her daddy is pro-women is laughable,

And stupid; and [t]Rump-like.

It's Snarkurday!

Christine Ouzounian, the former nanny who worked Jen Garner while she … ALLEGEDLY … schtupped Jen’s husband, Ben Affleck and was fired, loves all the media attention she’s getting.

She gets photographed a lot — usually after she calls the paparazzi with her whereabouts — putting gas in her new Lexus and has actually called the police to help her get away from the horde of shutterbugs she summed to watch her walk to her car; and let’s not even talk about the two, oh wait, now it’s three, bikini photo shoots she’s done since being outed as The Other Woman.

So, in case y’all forget, it’s Ouzounian who is keeping the “Affleck slept with the nanny” story alive and her name in the tabloids though maybe she’s had some help from Ben who might have bought her that new car and might be for her stay at the Bel Air Hotel.

Except the hotel, via a source — and it ain’t Lohan because she can’t afford four-star accommodations — says Ben “did not cover the Bel-Air bill. You would not find his card there, plain and simple.”

Wait. So his card wasn’t there? Well, howsabout his cash? Howsabout, ALLEGEDLY, billing the nanny’s stay to his manager and then paying the manager off?

Uh huh.

Madonna has always been known as a type-A perfectionist … or a bitch. You decide. And now comes word that she’s bringing her C U Next Tuesday-ness to her Rebel Heart Tour and her crew has just about had it.

According to an insider:

“Madonna is a real piece of work. On Monday night, the dancers declared mutiny on Madonna because she is working them way too hard. One dancer even went so far as to take off his credentials, throw it in her face and say, ‘F*ck you. I quit!’ She had to call security to protect her and escort her remaining dancers out! On another occasion, one of her dancers broke her arm during rehearsals and instead of showing concern, Madonna had a nuclear meltdown.”

But it gets uglier:

“Everyone is required to wear black head-to-toe at all times and she has said, in her own words, that there are ‘no fat c*nts allowed in her presence.’”

So is she a perfectionist, or is she a bitch who’s so concerned about the flopitude of the album Rebel Heart that she’s gone nuts with rehearsals for her upcoming tour?

I think you know.

In July 2014, Sherri Shepherd’s lawyers filed paperwork in her then-ongoing divorce battle with her husband, Lamar Sally stating that she did not want any part of the child she and Lamar were expecting via a surrogate because she’s a Christian! Or something.

Sherri claimed that Lamar was using the baby in an attempt to defraud her into paying his way for life, through child support and she wasn’t having it … except now a judge has ruled that Sherri is the baby mama, and since she doesn’t want the baby, she’ll be paying child support to Lamar, unless she can prove fraud. But that’s impossible when you go back in time to read all the interviews she gave where she talked endlessly about wanting this baby.

It’s very clear that, now, she doesn’t want the child because she might have to actually pay for it and she’s more about the coins than the children.

But remember, she’s a Good Christian … like Josh Duggar is a Good Christian.

Sharon Stone has had a varied career: Basic Instinct, an Oscar nomination for Casino … and then there was Catwoman, Basic Instinct 2, Diabolique, Sliver, Intersection, Gloria, and Allan Quatermain. But still, given all those bombs, Stone is now saying the worst thing that ever happened to her was a role on Law & Order: SVU.

Quelle horrors. Whilst posing nude for “Harper’s Bazaar” Stone discussed her humiliation at being on Law & Order and says her career had hit rock bottom when she got that script, but she had to do it to make that money.

“That was humiliating. Having worked with the finest people in the industry, I was like, ‘Wow, I’m really at the back of the line here. I’m wearing L’eggs panty hose, and in makeup they start out by putting this white primer on my face.’ I’m like, ‘This is so bad. What did I do to deserve this?’ “

But, ever the trooper, Stone endured the show:

“I thought, ‘You know what? I got thrown off the bullet train, and now I’m going to have to crawl up a hill of broken glass, get back on the train that’s going a million miles an hour, and work my way from the cattle car up. That’s just the way it is, so I’d better get humble and shut the fuck up and do the job. Because if I can’t do this job, I’m certainly not going to be able to do anything else.’ “

And she did it! She suffered through the humiliation of being on a hit TV show when the movies stopped calling; she suffered through the indignation of L’Eggs pantyhose and is now back to posing nude in a magazine. She’s fought back, tooth and nail to find herself once again staring in a lead role in a multi-million-dollar Oscar-worthy film role as … wait, what?

Oh, this Fall Sharon Stone will be starring in a new show for TNT and as a spokesperson for Restylane.

Yeah, she’s back, baby!

From the It Pays To Be A Celebrity File:

I posted this story already, but here’s a recap and an update: Earlier this year at Sundance, actor Emile Hirsch was accused of assaulting Dani Bernfeld, a Paramount VP. He was ALLEGEDLY very drunk and very pissy when he began “aggressively picking on” Bernfeld, He began by shouting at her for being a “rich kid” and “so tough” and then put her in a headlock until she passed out, at which point he body slammed her to the ground.

Dani recovered; Emile was charged with felony assault; Emile checked himself into alcohol rehab. And then came the trial, and his punishment for attacking a woman and choking her into unconsciousness,

Hirsch was sentenced to 15 days in jail and must pay a $4,750 fine and do 50 hours of community service.

Naturally, Dani Bernfeld isn’t happy:

“This act of violence has greater implications than the physical injuries I sustained. The long-lasting effects of this assault will remain with me. Mr. Hirsch’s plea, however, provides that in 90 days his case will be dismissed without record. There is no assurance that he will serve any of the 15 days of jail time associated with his plea. Quite simply, this punishment does not fit the crime. While I appreciate that the court is trying to send a message to Mr. Hirsch, the message to him and those who may follow needs to be louder and stronger.”

But, hey, he’s an actor, right?

Speaking of spoiled self-indulgent entitled celebrities: Jason Derulo.

Who? Yeah. The 25-year-old singer and his posse were kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight Saturday, after he and his bodyguard got into a verbal spat with an airline employee before boarding the jet.

It all began when Derulo’s team requested an escort, and preferred boarding, and were denied and they believed they were being treated unfairly because, you know, Jason Derulo.

Who? I said. When Derulo’s team voiced their concerns rather rudely and loudly they were told they could not fly but then proceeded to the plane anyway. At that point the Southwest agent called the authorities and removed them. Derulo and company opted to fly private, and  then he offered up his side of the story.

According to Jason’s rep, TSA precheck was down and Derulo and company were in too much of a hurry to do what every single other passenger boarding the plane was doing because, Jason Derulo.

Who? Wait. So, when told they had to wait, “someone” in the group said “bullshit” and the group was bounced.

Um, lemme see …. You say “bullshit” in an airport and you can’t board a plane? Uh huh.  I’d be on a no-fly list permanently.

So, Alec Baldwin hasn’t beat up a paparazzi lately, or had a meltdown on the street so maybe he’s settled down? Or, and this is probably more apt, maybe he’s too busy working to pay for the five nannies his wife Hilaria hired to take care of their two children.

Now, to be fair, maybe the Baldwin’s are both too busy with work that they need these five extra people to care for their children, and, well, they can no doubt afford, but when Hilaria Instagrammed a thank you to the Five Nannies — Lizzy, Sandra, Zena, Lisa and Avril — it created a social media storm requiring an explanation.

Hilaria posted her answer to Instagram and want y’all to know that not all five women are nannies … some are “babysitters.”

Oh ….

While divorcing his third wife, Terence Howard is also still in the middle of divorcing his second wife, Michelle Ghent and it is still all kinds of ugly.

At a hearing last week new testimony ran the gamut from suicide threats to drug use to blackmail to the, wait, what, Holocaust when Howard compared of giving in to ALLEGED blackmail threats from Ghent to  “the Jews giving in to the Germans [and going] to Auschwitz.”

Yup, the holocaust. And then to make matters worse, Howard continually interrupted the judge, often shrieking at him that the hearing was an “ambush” until the judge, and it should’a been Judy, told him to “learn some restraint.”

Howard talked about he and Ghent’s drug use — weed, coke and ecstasy — as the “only times [we were happy]” and talked of the threesome he and his wife had, and the time his wife had to Mace him and his family during a vacation.

Lovely, no? And then Ghent brought out the recordings and texts Howard sent her:

“I’m sitting here at lunch hoping you’ll call … every minute of every day I feel like putting an end to this miserable existence … every lie I’ve told to you are equal in my mind to putting bullets into a clip and firing them at my future. … I am devastated by my stupidity.”

 “I couldn’t do anything but sit there [looking] at a f—ing razor blade … I just wanted to die … I’ll look for you in my next lifetime.”

“So if you are planning on living without me, you should have someone put me out of my misery.”

And when that didn’t work, he went all Boiling The Bunny on Ghent:

“I will never allow another man to be with you. Whoever tried to take my life will lose his existence.”

“I will never allow a restraining order or anything to keep me from my wife.”

And then he claimed to be in fear of his wife:

“I loved her and was also afraid of her. Love is a very complicated thing. … I was in love with the person who [was holding me] captive.”

Wait. Isn’t that from an Empire episode?

Howard also admitted to Ghent that he would leave his now third ex-wife Mira Pak if Ghent would only come back to him — Howard and Pak married after dating for four weeks, had a kid and are now divorcing.

Yup, only in Hollywood can you still be fighting with your second ex-wife in divorce court while being sued for divorce from your third ex-wife.