Happy New Year

Since this is the season of giving, and perhaps, re-giving, I am going to repost some previous New Year's Day thoughts.

We will be spending today at David and Neal's--the Round-The-Way-Gays--with some good friends, good fun, good talk, good food, looking forward to what's coming next, and remembering what's happened this past year. And if this party is anything like last year, it'll be a day of eating, drinking, and being a bunch of Mary's.

Now, I love the New Year. The freshness of what may be; the thought of infinite possibility; the idea that I am another year older. okay, that last one I don't like so much, but since, as I tell my sister who thinks I never look any older, that The Gays aren't allowed to age, I don't mind the extra year under the belt.

But I do look forward to doing more, and learning more, thinking more, reading more, loving more, laughing more. These aren't resolutions, as I don't make resolutions because when I do, my resolutions last about as long as it takes me to say resolution. These are promises and wishes, hopes and dreams. Still, if I could make any changes in the New year, they may sound like this:

I will not lie awake at night and listen to Carlos snore, wishing I could pull a cartoon cast-iron skillet out from under the mattress and bash him over the head with it. I will nudge him gently, smile at him sweetly, and say to him lovingly, KNOCK IT OFF!

I will see to it that Carlos' Cinco de Never party has a second go-round, with all sorts of Mexican dishes and goodies. Tamales and margaritas? Please.

I will take better care of myself. I understand the shingles is not something I endured because of anything I did wrong, but I will look for ways to feel better, and guard against these types of ailments.

I will stop making fun of the fact that our dog can comfortably ride in the glovebox of my car and is the size of a pair of workboots. Okay, I won't do that, but it sounds good on paper.

I will treat my boss with the respect and dignity he deserves. He may be reading this, and even he knows that ain't gonna happen, but again, in theory, it sounds good.

I will remove Paris Hilton from my list of things I hate, not because I no longer dislike her, but because she's over. That rule does not hold true for Lindsey Lohan and Oprah. Sorry girls.

Lastly, I'll leave you all to have a good day, with a repost of last New Years Day. The more things change :::blibbety blah blay bloo touch me::: the more they remain the same:
 I am a believer in happiness. I believe that happiness is all we really get in life, and that everything else follows. Things don't make us happy, at least not for long. And you can't expect people to make you happy either; you either have it to begin with, and others add to it, or you don't. If you don't believe that, just look around at all the sad, angry, lonely faces you pass on the street. Happiness is something you possess, that you give out, and give back. We're responsible for our own happiness, each and all of us; responsible to find it, to hold on to it; to nurture it and share it. Without happiness in ourselves, for being ourselves, how can we expect to live fully and completely.

We suffer loss every day; I've had my share and, sad to say, I know there's more to come, but I feel happy in the memories I have of those who've gone on ahead. I know it's hard to be happy when times are hard. It's near impossible to think that things will get better, but they will; it might not be the better you were thinking it would be, but I have learned that it will get better.

I have learned, from my Father the Teacher, never to stop learning and reading and speaking and, well, ranting; the more you learn, the more you grow, and understand, the more happiness you can accept.

I have learned, from my Mother the Nurturer, to care for things, for people, for animals for life; to make each day better for those around us, and to make it better for ourselves in the end.

I have learned, from my Sister the Temper, to speak up; why sit quietly and let things happen to you? Stand up and demand the things you want, the happiness you want. Don't settle.

I have learned, from my Brother the Father, to hold close to family; never let them go; whether it's the family you were born into, or the family you created out of necessity; hold on to them, and protect them, and love them.

I have learned, from my Partner the Optimist, how to actually let go and be in love and damn the torpedoes; how to be open and honest and know that it won't hurt; how to love yourself, and everyone around you.

So, I once again realize that I have learned to be happy; I've earned happiness. And I am responsible for it. It is, after all, all you really get in life.

Someday

When we are wiser

When the world's older

When we have learned

I pray

Someday we may yet live

To live and let live

Someday

Life will be fairer

Need will be rarer

Greed will not pay

God speed

This bright millennium

On its way

Let it come

Someday

Someday

Our fight will be won then

We'll stand in the sun then

That bright afternoon

Till then

On days when the sun is gone

We'll hang on

Wish upon the moon

Change will come

There are some days dark and bitter

Seems we haven't got a prayer

But a prayer for someday better

Is the one thing we all share

Someday

Life will be fairer

Need will be rarer

Greed will not pay

God speed

This bright millennium

Let it come

Wish upon the moon

Change will come

One day

Someday

Soon.