Bobservations

The other morning over breakfast I was chatting with Carlos and he said:

“What?”

I repeated myself and he said:

“What?”

“Are your hearing aids in?”

“Yes.”

Cut to a couple of hours later and I’m leaving for work. I tell him I’m going to take some of his Tic Tacs with me and head into the kitchen. I start to pour some Tic Tacs into my hand when one pops out and hits the floor … FROM THE LIVING ROOM … I hear:

“Are you throwing my Tic Tacs on the floor?”

That he hears! Selective hearing is real, y’all.

This is Tuxedo from January 28, 2021: 

Tuxedo is growing ever more annoyed by Republicans who think sedition isn’t impeachment worthy.

Sidenote: cut to 2025, and the GOP shuts down Congress for an early Summer recess so they don’t have to deal with the Epstein files and the fact that their leader is a predator and child raping liar.

Kim Davis, the Kentucky Kounty Klerk who went to jail a decade ago rather than issue a marriage license to a gay couple, is now petitioning the Supreme Court to overturn Obergefell v. Hodges.

I’d like her hairdresser to overturn that mass of swamp weed on her head.

It’s a fact that most mass shooters in the U.S. are straight white men, yet no one asks white politicians to answer for them. But Republicans think Zohar Mamdani should answer questions because the Manhattan shooter is Ugandan? That’s not public safety, that’s scapegoating; that’s racism.

And it’s enough. Vote every Republican out of office, every office in every city in every state.

Every so often there are cakes that just make you wanna jump for joy … and here there are!

They say the one way to shame a woman is to say she sleeps with a lot of men. And they also say to shame a man is to say he sleeps with men.

The conclusion seems to be that sleeping with men is considered shameful.

For the love of the Baby Cheeses explain to me why anyone would think this shirt is cool, or looks good, or seems like you didn’t drag it out of a dumpster and cut the hardened pit stains out of it so you could wear it in public.

I found something new to say when I meet a MAGAt and they wanna talk The Felon. Listen politely to  their madness and then quietly, calmly say:

He wasn’t shot. He didn’t win. He’s on the list.

And calmly stroll away; works every time.

This is Doug Mason, born in San Diego and a competitive athlete before becoming a much sought after model, but the real question is: Would You Hit It?

What's This? Nice News??

I admit it takes me longer to gather the Nice Stories these days when Stupid abounds, but here's what's making me smile for a Tuesday:

RAFAEL, ER, TED, UM, KAREN

The other day Senator Ted Karen Cruz  got into a confrontation with employees at Bozeman Yellowstone International Airport which grew so heated that law enforcement had to get involved, a new video showed on Sunday. 

Cruz was spotted at the Montana airport on Sunday, apparently irritated that he had missed his flight and pitched a hissy because he’d missed the check-in window for his flight, and that re-booking options were 'limited out of Bozeman due to Spring Break.' 

As always happens with a Karen, someone was filing the exchange, which shows Cruz vigorously nodding his head in annoyance at the two female employees; he appeared less annoyed when the female employees stepped aside and a single male law enforcement officer took over. 

The person who took the video claims Cruz muttered something along the lines of ‘Don’t you know who I am’ to the police who says he did not know who the Karen was, until after Cruz had walked away.

One thing of note, the Texas Republican who last week claimed pilots and flight attendants regularly “hug “ at airports because of his stance against mask mandates, and who also proudly rode around DC in a big rig during the protest over mandates, was wearing a mask.

Cruz was finally able to leave that evening and all of Montana heaved a sigh of relief.

Oh Karen …

MILA AND ASHTON

Kudos to Mila Kunis and her husband, Ashton Kutcher, for their efforts to help the people of Ukraine during Putin’s attack on that country.

Kunis, a native of Ukraine, and Kutcher have set up a GoFundMe campaign that has so far raised over $35 million toward refugee and humanitarian aid efforts. The couple also pledged $3 million of their own money.

The couple’s GoFundMe is HERE, and then HERE is a list of other ways to help Ukrainian refuges.

KIM DAVIS

A U.S. judge ruled that a former Kentucky Kounty Klerk Kim Davis county knowingly violated the rights of same-sex couples by denying them marriage licenses in 2015, clearing the way for a jury trial seeking damages against her.

Davis thrust herself into the center of the same-sex marriage debate when she refused to issue marriage  licenses to same-sex couples citing the Baby Jeebus as her excuse.

The two couples in the lawsuit— David Ermold and David Moore, and James Yates and Will Smith— had sought to marry in the immediate aftermath of the landmark 2015 U.S. Supreme Court decision Obergefell v. Hodges, and sued Davis claiming she had violated their constitutional rights. Now, with the essential facts in the case now settled, the two couples  can proceed to jury trial to seek damages against Davis as an individual.

We haven’t heard about Bigot Kim in a long time and it’s nice to see that she’s lost her battle and can be sued.

Now, see there? It’s not all Stupids; there’s some fun and nice and well-deserved news in the world today!

Bobservations

We went out to brunch over the weekend with our good friends David and Neal to celebrate both my birthday and their 4th wedding anniversary; four doesn’t sound long, but it’s only the amount of time their relationship has been legally and rightfully recognized. It was actually their 35th anniversary.

So there.

On Sunday, Carlos and I were running some errands and we stopped at Tractor Supply to get cat litter. As we checked out, the cashier asked if we’d found everything we wanted, and I said:

“We did. It’s my birthday and he’s buying me cat litter.”

Later in the day, when Tia Gloria called form Mexico to sing me ♪ ♫ Happy Birthday ♫ ♪ over the phone, she asked how we were spending the day, I told her Carlos had gotten me cat litter for my birthday.

She asked to speak to him. And when I spoke with my father and told him of the gift … he asked to speak with Carlos, too.

Those were all good birthday presents!

As was the day spent with Carlos and the Chocolate Orange Cake he made for me.

There’s a sucker born every minute … at least that’s what the folks at Farfetch, an online luxury fashion platform that sells products from over 700 boutiques, thinks because they are offering a Hanes Beefy-T with a small Prada logo sewn onto it for the low, low price of $410.

Seriously.

Senator Joni Ernst filed for divorce, claiming her husband assaulted her years ago, though she never reported the assault to the police.

Last fall, Senator Joni Ernst dismissed Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony against Brett Kavanaugh because her story was  “uncorroborated.”

Let that sink in.

After years of unofficial ’Gay Days’ at Disney theme parks, Disneyland Paris has announced its first ever LGBTQ Pride event called Magical Pride. The park will welcome guests to “discover the enchantment of Disney with the Sparkle of Pride!”

Here’s hoping it spreads to the rest of the Disney empire.

Sidenote: years back Carlos and I were at Disneyworld in Orlando, and as we were leaving the park, and holding hands, two women walked around us and ahead, also holding hands. From behind us someone shouted:

“What is this? Gay Day?”

And one of the women shouted back:

“Every day is Gay Day.”

Yup.

Rent: Live it was not.

The actor playing Roger, Brennin Hunt, broke his foot near the end of Saturday’s rehearsal, so producers decided to show us a recording of that performance. The show was only truly live for the last few minutes, including a finale with members of the original Broadway cast—Idina Menzel, Anthony Rapp, Daphne Rubin-Vega, and Taye Diggs—singing “Seasons of Love”.

And so it’s no surprise that Rent Not Live  was the least watched and lowest rated of the trend to date, in part perhaps due to a cast who was saving their best, and fullest, energy for the live performance and not a taped rehearsal.

This week _____ announced that he wanted to allow students who wish to study the Bible to be able to do so in schools, all schools, and his Evangelical Hypocritical Fake Faith Racist base cheered.

They cheered a man who cheated on his first wife with his second wife, then cheated on his second wife with his third wife, then cheated on his third wife with a porn actress and nude model while the wife was pregnant with his fifth child from three different women.

Right?

Lawyers for Kentucky’s Republican Governor Matt Bevin say that former Rowan Kounty Klerk Kim Davis must pay the $225,000 in legal fees owed to the gay couples who sued her for refusing to issue marriage licenses because of her ALLEGED Christian-based opposition to same-sex marriage.

Nice; except it shows the hypocrisy of Bevin. See, while Bevin has called Davis “an inspiration … to the children of America,” after a district judge ruled that the couples suing for marriage licenses clearly prevailed and that the state of Kentucky must pay their fees and costs, Bevin and his lawyers want the bill handed to Davis, and say she acted alone in denying the marriage licenses.

Hypocrisy. GOP.

Russia has embarrassed _____ … again!

This week the Kremlin leaked news that  Putin met with _____ and his nude model wife, Melanie, at the G-20 Summit in Buenos Aires last fall.  The embarrassment is _____ meeting with his boss and handler, Putin, but that not one single US official was present … no collusion, nothing to see, witch hunt … no government officials, no translators, no one from the State Department. It is unprecedented to have held the meeting without a U.S. witness, especially someone to record the details of what happened.

But that was only the first embarrassment; the second embarrassment came via TASS, Russia’s official state media news outlet of the Kremlin who, when asked about _____’s lack of even an interpreter, said:

"It’s none of our business whether _____ had an interpreter; Putin’s interpreter is always by his side — we have stability and order in that regard.”

We don’t because Putin owns _____ , his beck-and-call girl, and when Putin calls, _____ obeys.

New Funny Irreverent Show Alert … The Other Two tells the story of siblings Cary and Brooke whose lives are upended when their 13-year-old brother, Chase, becomes a Justin Bieber-esque type overnight sensation.

It’s very funny, and the humor is quite ballsy, and then there’s the relationship between Cary, played by Drew Tarver, left, who is gay, and his roommate, played by Andy Riddings, right, who is not, and how they just like to make out every so often.

Plus, they’re cute, so yeah, there’s that.

But it’s the funny that gets me. Okay, and the cute guys making out.

Bobservations

Well well well…yesterday one of the nation’s largest sports retailers, Dick’s Sporting Goods, announced it was immediately ending sales of all assault-style rifles in its stores and that they would no longer sell guns to anyone under 21 years of age, regardless of local laws.

And then Walmart announced the minimum age to buy guns in their stores would be raised to 21.

And so it begins …

For eight years we endured gun nuts and the NRA telling Americans that Obama was coming for their guns and yet that never happened.

And now the NRA’s $30 million man, _____, has said he favors taking guns away from people who might commit violence before going through legal due process.

And yet I’m not hearing outcry. Why?

And we all know _____ wants to arm teachers, but maybe he needs to give that some thought … or any thought.

Jesse Randal Davidson, a teacher from Dalton High School in Georgia was arrested yesterday after firing a handgun inside his classroom and sending panicked students running for their lives.

Armed teachers.

Donald Trump’s closest adviser, former model …. Yes, I said “model” …  Hope Hicks is resigning one day after she testified for eight hours before the House Intelligence Committee, telling them she had to tell white lies for Trump.

She admitted she lies for the president. Again, where’s the GOP outrage?

I remember a few weeks back when people, including myself, poked fun at Michele Bachmann for saying she was waiting for a sign from God to tell her if she should run for Al Franken’s former Senate seat,

God told her no. This week, Oprah, still pushing that ‘Will she or won’t she’ bullshit, says she is also asking God to tell her if she should run:

“I went into prayer… ‘God, if you think I’m supposed to run, you gotta tell me, and it has to be so clear that not even I can miss it.’ And I haven’t gotten that.”

Um, yeah, Oprah, cuz God doesn’t want you to run, so why not close your cakehole, because I’m sure it’s filled with cake, and be quiet.

In What The Hell Was He Thinking News … last week Illinois Governor Bruce Rauner drank a glass of chocolate milk to demonstrate his belief in diversity:

“It’s really, really good. Diversity!”

It all happened because of Hyatt Hotels diversity and inclusion executive Tyronne Stoudemire, who appeared with Rauner at Chicago’s Thompson Center to discuss workplace diversity at a Black History Month event. Stoudemire, who is black, poured a glass of milk to represent the white men who lead most organizations:

“This chocolate syrup represents diversity.”

Stoudemire squirted chocolate syrup into the glass and it instantly sank to the bottom.

“When you look at most organizations, diversity sits at the bottom of the organization. You don’t get inclusion until you actually stir it up.”

Rauner then stirred the syrup into the milk, turning it brown, and he took a sip and pronounced it good.

Seriously.

I like Dianne Feinstein, one of the nation’s best-known and longest-serving politicians, but let’s face it, even she needs to go sometime. She is 84-years-old and has been serving as the senator from California since 1992.

This week at their state convention, did not endorse Feinstein for reelection. Fifty-four% of delegates endorsed Feinstein’s opponent, state senator Kevin de León, a Democrat from Los Angeles, while just 37% supported Feinstein.

Feinstein has done a wonderful job, but if she wins reelection she’ll be 91 at the end of the next term. Don’t we need some new blood in the Senate?

So, Delta decided to no longer offer discounts to NRA members and the Georgia GOP—the same GOP that begs folks not to politicize gun deaths—has blocked a lucrative tax break bill that would benefit Delta Air Lines because Delta chose to say No to the NRA.

Georgia Lt. Gov. Casey Cagle says he will not support tax legislation that help the airline “unless the company changes its position and fully reinstates its relationship with the NRA.”

Huh, extortion much?

Delta, which has been based in Atlanta for nearly 80 years, is the state’s largest private employer, with 33,000 workers statewide and $300 million in state and local tax revenue annually.

And, if Democrats elsewhere have it their way, that could all end …. see, after the Georgia GOP threatened Delta, Democrats in other states responded by publicly wooing Delta.

Virginia Governor Ralph Northam Tweeted: 

“Virginia is for lovers and airline hubs.”

Kathy Hochul, the lieutenant governor of New York also Tweeted: 

“You’re welcome here any time. Move HQ to where you’re appreciated?”

Birmingham Mayor Randall Woodfin Tweeted at Delta:

“Let’s Chat.”

Careful who you threaten Georgia.

Sorry, not sorry, but former drug company executive and asshat Martin Shkreli will be held responsible for $10.4 million in financial losses when he is sentenced for defrauding investors.

U.S. District Judge Kiyo Matsumoto rejected his argument that he did not cause any losses because his investors eventually came out ahead. The ruling could mean more prison time for Shkreli, since the amount of financial loss plays a major role in federal sentencing guidelines.

Again, sorry, not sorry.

In Hypocrisy news … Kentucky Kounty Clerk Kim Davis has written a book—and I didn’t think she could even read—called Under God’s Authority: The Kim Davis Story in which Kimmy details her personal experience from the moment Kentucky’s governor ordered the state’s county clerks to issue same-sex marriage licenses, throughout her arrest and release from jail.

Former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee calls it “a great read!”

Bigoted Franklin Graham says, “in a culture that demeans people who obediently follow Jesus, Kim Davis drew on His strength as she experienced—and endured—persecution from the culture, the court, and the crowds, and survived to tell about it all in her compelling book Under God’s Authority.”

God says “The fuck you talkin’ bout Kim? How many sanctified marriages have you had and how many spouses did you cheat on? Siddown.”

So, my boss’ son also works with us, and, well, you know how I am … the other day at work he was showing a picture of his mother to a co-worker who remarked how young Mama looked.

Son said, “When I was in high school people thought she was my girlfriend.”

I said, “Well, that’s because you went to prom with your mom.”

Son said, “I didn’t go to prom with my mom!”

I said, “Oh yeah, that was Homecoming, you went to prom with your sister.”

And I’m still employed.

Republicans are worried that former state Senator Steve Montenegro will “pull a Roy Moore” and lose a reliably red Arizona congressional seat if he wins Tuesday’s special primary election. Montenegro is running for a seat vacated by GOP Congressman Trent Franks who announced he was resigning t after the House Ethics Committee began investigating accusations of sexual harassment against him; Franks offered a staffer $5 million to carry his baby.

But Montenegro, a married minister, admitted that he had exchanged in a sexting relationship with a junior state legislative staffer for months, including receiving nude photos from the woman. The woman says those exchanges followed conversations during which Montenegro “groomed” her for an affair.

Arizona? Say No Moore to Montenegro.

Okay … to be completely honest, while I am no fan of cheating GOP ministers, Montenegro is hot.

And a palate cleanser … staring with Marcc Rose, playing Tupac in Unsolved: The Murders of Tupac and the Notorious B.I.G.. Then there’s the always adorable Chris Pine from Wonder Woman … yes, we just saw Wonder Woman. And lastly Lucien Laviscount, gosh, I love that name, it sounds like a vampire, who was the only good … shirtless … thing in a horror film called The Bye Bye Man.

Just sayin’.

Random Musings

As women all over the country continue to speak up about rampant sexual harassment and assault by powerful men, one women takes the Low Road: Kellyanne Conway.

During Conway’s interview at Politico’s Women Rule event with Anna Palmer, a woman in the audience wanted to know why Conway continued working with _____ given his record toward women, and Conway’s’ response was perfectly suited to her boss:

HECKLER: Kellyanne, your boss grabs women—

PALMER: Excuse me, we’re going to have a—I just want to say—

CONWAY: She just wants to go viral. [To heckler] But just remember, you didn’t get the question out of your mouth.

HECKLER: I got the question out of my mouth. Your boss grabs women by the pussy! Why do you work for him?

CONWAY: [to the host] By the way, you don’t have to remove her on my account. I very much believe in the First Amendment. And I think anybody has a right to sound like a complete jackass if they’d like to.

AUDIENCE: [boos and hisses]

Yes, Kellyanne Conway, who has spoken of her own issues of sexual harassment calls a victim a “jackass,”

No wonder people call her Cuntway.

Hooray for Austria!

This week the country's top court ruled that same-sex couples can marry:

"The Constitutional Court nullified with a decision on December 4, 2017 the legal regulation that until now prevented such couples from marrying."

Still, The Gays cannot marry until December 31, 2018.

But the march goes on …

As a person who hates bugs—Carlos is the Bug Killer at our house while I do snakes—this news makes my stomach turn:

If spiders worked together they could eat all human beings in a year.

At the moment—cuz that could change if these critters start talking to one another—spiders mostly eat insects, although some of the larger species have been known to snack on lizards, birds and even small mammals. But “experts said that if you add up the weight of all the food eaten by the world’s entire spider population in a single year is more than the combined weight of every human on the planet.”

I need to join the space program and get off’a this planet before the spiders unite!

It was a couple of weeks back when the Fat Bastard took to Twitter to kvetch and moan and snivel about not being chosen as TIME’s Person of the Year while still trying to pretend that he wasn’t interested in the award:

“Time Magazine called to say that I was PROBABLY going to be named “Man (Person) of the Year,” like last year, but I would have to agree to an interview and a major photo shoot. I said probably is no good and took a pass. Thanks anyway!”

And, of course, TIME came for him, pointing out that the “phone call” story was a lie and said the finalists weren’t going to be released until much later. And so now, here’s your TIME Person of the Year:

I wanna see _____’s head implode when he realizes he was beaten by women … again.

Not that it can explode since it’s empty.

And just a quick note to The Deplorables….

Hillary Clinton DID NOT Lie to the FBI. Hillary Clinton DID NOT collude with a hostile foreign government.Hillary Clinton DID NOT get Indicted.Hillary Clinton did not Plead Guilty to a crime.

That was Michael Flynn.

Lock him up.

David Ermold was one of the gay men—with David Moore, below—who was denied a marriage license by Kim Davis in Rowan County, Kentucky a couple of years ago, and now he’s challenging her for her job:

“I am running to restore the confidence of the people in our clerk’s office and because I believe that the leaders of our community should act with integrity and fairness, and they should put the needs of their constituents first. My commitment to Rowan County is to restore professional leadership, fairness, and responsibility to the clerk’s office. I will build upon the successes of the past, and I will seek solutions for the challenges we may still face.”

Davis announced she was running for reelection last month but now maybe she’ll be once again given another smackdown by The Gays.

Again, a_____ controversy, this time his endorsement of a pedophile to the Senate, his Tax Scam, his reversal of decades of policy on Israel, and his opening up of protected national treasures to drilling and mining have the press corps frothing at the mouth to answer questions.

But reporters arriving at Air Force One in Utah on Monday quickly learned that White House officials were not going to allow on-the-record questions on any of it when White House deputy press secretary Hogan Gidley refused to answer any questions on the record:

REPORTER: We have to ask the questions—

GIDLEY: I understand that, you have a job to do and so do I.

REPORTER: You’re not doing your job. Your job is literally to take questions from us. That’s the whole point of this … you can release paper statements if you want.

GIDLEY: Please tell me more about my job if I get to tell you more about yours.

That’s the _____ White House, refusing to answer to the American people.

Keep that in mind, the midterm elections will be here soon enough and we need to flip Congress. Get a Democrat as Speaker of the House, then impeach _____ and Pence for their lies and collusion and obstruction of justice and we can have a Democrat as president to represent the entire country.

Just sayin’.

Now, to be completely bipartisan, I think it’s time Al Franken step down.

If we all demand that Roy Moore not be allowed in the Senate because of things he’s done, then we need to ask the same of Franken. We cannot play party politics. If you act inappropriately you must resign.

But that’s just me … or is it?

Now, that said, Roy Moore better be forced out if he wins.

Oh, and speaking of sexual predators and accused pedophile Roy Moore, howsabout the news that Roy, the good Christian boy … cough cough …began dating his wife Kayla when she was still legally married to her first husband.

Pedophile. Predator. Adulterer. No wonder _____ backs him.

We had a free weekend of HB) a while back and I recorded the entire season of their reboot of Westworld. It’s really quite good, and not just because it features James Marsden as Teddy; Marsden is just beautiful, though, sadly, he gets killed in almost every episode.

Also, continuing their trend of hot Men is Once Upon a Time who introduced Nathan parson as a good guy or a baddie who looks good in modern clothes and a codpiece.

Just sayin’.