Close To Done ...

I have had many, many … okay, maybe just two … people ask about the kitchen remodel:

Where are the photos??
When is it going to be done?

Well, here are the photos and it’ll be done, sigh, when it’s done. Those are the before pictures up there, and it looks good, but I think that’s just the lighting. And below we’ll start with some of the recent photos; as you can see the layout stayed the same, which was done for Carlos’ eyesight. We have kept everything, except the dishwasher, in the same spot so it’s easier for Carlos to navigate.

Let’s dish …

This is the new kitchen yesterday morning; I love the blue and honey cabinets and I love the blue cabinets and how they go up on the pantry, and then the honey cabinets and how they come down around the fridge, and onto the island.

We did a large subway tile in a stacked formation along the walls because it bounces light around the kitchen and plays off the lighter tones in the quartz.

And the stove wall … and the vent hood, the bane of my existence. I found a hood I liked, had the power we wanted and yet ran very quietly and so I ordered it online. It was to come in a week … it took a month. And then there weren’t enough of the chimney sections to reach the 9-foot ceilings; it was about ten inches short. So, I emailed the company and the manufacturer and both replied “That’s how they’re made and we don’t make other pieces to fit a taller ceiling”—even though the website claimed the chimney went up to ten feet.

And after they gave me the “There’s nothing we can do” speech, they had the nerve to say, “Is there anything else we can help you with?”

“Um, let me see … you helped me with the—oh, yeah, you haven’t helped me at all!”

Click.

So a new hood was ordered once we double- and triple-checked that it would go up to the ceiling and it was set to be delivered in a week and as you can see it has yet to arrive.

Breathe.

This is the sink wall with a muted Mexican tile that rises from the counter between the two upper cabinets to the ceiling—this same tile pattern will go behind the stove once the %&$#ing new hood arrives. I love the look of the tile because it has all the colors of the cabinetry and hardware:

And also has all the colors in the quartz, from the dark blue to the grays to the tans; that’s my favorite thing.

In addition to a rectangle sink; I don’t know why, but I love a good rectangle sink.

The far end of the kitchen we have no photos for, because the walls need to be finished and the floating shelve above two small cabinets that will hold cookbooks and tchotchkes and such, are not up yet, and the flooring … the next step for the entire house, is not down yet.

But it’s closer to being done and that’s a good thing.

Bobservations

As I’ve said before, Carlos and I love Jeopardy and watch it most nights, playing along. But the other night we got stumped by the final Jeopardy question:

“Missionary William Ellis  reported in 1825 that ‘his bones were preserved and considered sacred’ by the people of Hawaii.”

I said:

“Father Damian”

“Who?”

“Father Damien, Part of Hawaii was a leper colony back in the day so they’re probably honoring him.”

“Oh—”

“Or it’s King Kamehameha.”

And both were wrong; it was Captain Cook, leading Carlos to say:

“Who?”

“Captain Cook. He was an explorer in the Pacific.”

“Captain  Kirk? From Star Trek?”

“What!??!! Captain Kirk? From a TV show? They saved his bones from when he died in 1825 even though he was in a TV show in the 1960s? Oh my god, do you think Star Trek was real and Kirk and the Enterprise traveled back in time to 1825 to explore the Hawaiian Islands?”

“I’m not talking to you for the rest of the night.”

I thought that was best.

This Tuxedo Says is from May 2021 …

"Tuxedo doesn’t wanna tell y’all how to vote, but he does think you’ve been getting it wrong for years."

And while he’d never tell you how to vote, he would demand that you, ahem, CAST A GODDAMNED VOTE!!

Texas Governor Hot Wheels followed Florida Governor Gogo Boots' lead by demanding that all rainbow Pride crosswalks be painted over because he Hates The Gays.

So, in a statement of support for the LGBTQ community, Oak Lawn United Methodist Church in Dallas decided to paint their front steps leading to the church in rainbow colors. Senior Pastor Reverend Rachel Griffin-Allison called it a demonstration of faith and inclusivity, conveying that every person is created in God’s image and deserves dignity and belonging. The church sees this not as a political stance, but as a commitment to love and support marginalized communities.

It's a sign of Resistance, too.

Many in The Cult have begun ranting that Obama built a basketball for anywhere between $200M and $376M court while president and that’s no different than Cankles erecting The Jeffrey E[stein Ballroom.

But here’s the deal, you neanderthals … no offense to actual neanderthals … Obama converted an existing outdoor tennis court into a basketball court by painting new lines and installing a couple of hoops and it cost nowhere near the hundreds of millions y’all claim.

He didn’t fucking bulldoze a house.

We had a small glitch with the kitchen this week. A cabinet felt off-center and there were some panels that weren’t the right ones, so I called the company and their contractor and designer came out to talk it over. Luckily, our contractor was here—he’s doing tiles work and installing new lighting—so we all were able to talk it out and get the problems solved … but not the problem of my mouth … so when their contractor asked if  one line on the wall was straight and Craig, our contractor, said there were no straight walls in any house he’s ever worked in, and I said:

“There’s nothing straight at all about this house.”

The designer, Carlos and I chuckled; the contractors didn’t get the joke. But as they were leaving the designer joked about not having a negative review on Facebook from me, and I said:

“I would never leave a bad review on Facebook. I’d just firebomb the office and torch the business to the ground.”

She laughed; I didn’t … for a couple of moments!

Gabriel Burger is a Brazilian model based in São Paulo—which we know makes him one of Maddie’s favorites—but Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

This week Carlos is presenting at a seminar on the Hispanic community and HIV/AIDS in Columbia. And since it’s a two-day event I took him to Columbia Tuesday night—and we’ll meet friends for dinner—and then he’ll stay with another friend who is also heading to the seminar so I will have a couple of days to myself.

Cue the trumpets! Carlos never understands how I like being by myself—he loathes it—so I have been teasing him about all the things I’ll be doing this week, but to make himself feels better … cue sarcasm … I asked him to prepare three café con leches that I can keep in the fridge and heat up for my breakfast … and I asked him to prepare the cat’s meals for breakfast, dinner and snacks for two days and leave those in the fridge, too, so I can just set them out for the cats.

“Wow, you want me to get a ride home every morning to clean the litter boxes, too?”

“No, I’ll take care of that.”

“You’ll do it.”

“Goddess no. I have called Ivan [the very beautiful young man who does some yard work for us] to stop by every morning and clean them … naked.”

Carlos nearly choked but the truth is, even for two-and-a-half days, I’ll miss him.

This Tuxedo Says is from May 2021:

I don’t know about you, but I think Tuxedo is onto something here. Liz? If you’re reading this, give him a call.

But then Liz showed us, again , that she would never sink that low because she puts America over the GOP.

I’m not sure, I am just guessing, but if you take your cakes into the shower with you, do they stay extra moist?

Jennifer Flavin, Sylvester Stallone’s wife, shared her stupid reasons why children of celebrities are more likely to identify as transgender:

“I just think Hollywood is, you know, it’s all about expression. So, you know, however you want to express yourself. If you feel like a cat today, you’re a cat. And it’s so loosey-goosey. I don’t think that we’re really understanding that these kids are not our accessories. They’re little human beings that need structure. And structure is really important for them because it helps their brain organize everything.”

Flavin also says celebrities’ wealth plays a part—not her kids mind you because she’s a better parent than everyone else—went on to speak about her own daughters Sophia, Sistine, and Scarlet:

“It’s OK what you decide to be as an adult, but raise them just with good common sense … my daughters were tomboys. They preferred to wear pants than dresses, you know? And they loved sports. But I never said, ‘Oh, you’re a boy now.’ I just said, ‘You love to play sports, you love to hang out with boys, that’s awesome.'”

Oh, you’re a boy now, Jennifer? Is that how transgender works? Raise them to be decent, educated, accepting people, Jennifer, and pray to the almighty that they don’t decide to be cats … or you.

Speaking of trans I saw this on Facebook:

A man posed the question:

What’s the difference between:

A] Transwomen

B] Women

Let the tolerant crowd explain this one. I’ll get the popcorn.

And someone replied:

Trans women have only had to cover their drinks around you since they transitioned.

Happy to help.

I might have added, Now f*ck off.

Just a couple of new photos of the kitchen progress … I love the honey cabinets with the dark blue and both of those colors are subtly picked up in the countertops … which are about a week or so out. Then we’ll pick tile for the backsplash, hoping to find some Mexican tiles as accents.

Soon …..

Am I the only one who thinks it should be a much bigger deal, and something that should never be forgotten, that the Vice President of the United States rose to the defense of Young Republicans who openly spoke of their love for Hitler, slavery and raping women?

Never let JD forget what he said.

A spot of good news … here’s a list of some of the countries that also celebrated No Kings day with protests against Cankles:

Portugal … Spain … Netherlands … Norway … Sweden … Belgium … Czech Republic … Denmark … Finland … France … Germany … Italy … Ireland … United Kingdom … Canada … Mexico … Costa Rica … Japan … Australia.

We are not alone; our allies are global.

James Yates, a British model, has shot campaigns for the likes of Hugo Boss and Tom Ford and calls both LA and Australia home, so … Would You Hit It?

PS I would.

Bobservations

Carlos and I got into a discussion of those faux christians—small c—who are really the problem with religion because they believe they’re job is set others on the straight and narrow, rather than just worrying about themselves and inflicting their beliefs on others.

 Carlos muttered something about ear wax and how they don’t listen and I said:

“Huh?”

“Wax fills their ears and they cannot hear.”

“Where is all this wax coming from?”

“All the candles.”

“So, their lack of understanding comes from ears full of wax because churches have too many candles.”

“Exactly.”

“I’ll pray for you.”

And I did.

This Tuxedo Says is from May 2021:

We have no idea exactly how old Tuxedo is. When we rescued him from an animal hospital Carlos managed in Miami, he was a grown-assed cat, so I’m thinking he was a year or more then. We’ve lived in Camden for almost fifteen years [at the time of this post], and had him for about a year or so before that, so he’s seventeen? Eighteen? Just a guess.

And he’s getting older. He has issues with his kidneys and is on a special diet, which he actually loves; and he’s so smart that he will not even bother with the “other cat’s” food but will wait for his meals. He’s also lost some muscle mass in his back legs and so he is no longer a jumper. That cat that used to jump to a high closet shelf, a bathroom counter, a high bed, now doesn’t jump at all, and when he wants to sit in my lap, he puts his front paws on my knee and I hoist him up.

However, he still loves sitting in a windowsill on a sunny morning, and the sills at Casa Bob y Carlos are about 14 inches off the ground but even that’s too high for him; and, because some vicious person declawed him before we saved him, he has no front claws to help him up. So, again, he’s very smart, he uses his paws to grab the sill and then stretches his legs out so that his, what I would call forearms, are on the sill, and he lifts himself onto the sill, and then naps.

Breaks my heart, but he makes do and is still a loving sweet smart boy.

Goddess I miss that cat …

Diane Keaton was one of my favorite actors and from watching her interviews one of my favorite kinds of people. I loved her style, her hats and her joie de vivre. She passed away last weekend quite suddenly leaving behind two children.

RIP ... and thank you.

We have begun the kitchen remodel and, as you can see from the top photo, that’s the ‘old’ kitchen on the morning of demo.

We have moved the dishes and pots and pans to the dining room, and the food from the cupboards to boxes in the dining room. The coffee maker and expresso machine, as well as the microwave, are in the laundry room. In the morning Carlos makes the rounds from dining room—for oatmeal—to the torn-out kitchen—for milk—to the laundry room—to make the café con leche.

It's a journey but hopefully we’ll be 90% done by sometime next week.

PS That’s the demolished kitchen below along with a photo of the stone we picked out for the countertops.

Kim Kardastrophe who never met a thirst trap she didn’t want to dive into has come up with a new product: her company, Skims, announced that they would be entering the merkin market, launching a line of thongs named ‘The Ultimate Bush.’

The collection of thongs features a variety of hair textures and tones attached to the front and the collection was launched via a campaign video set on a retro 1970s-style game show called ‘Does the Capet Match the Drapes’  with the tagline:

“With our daring new Faux Hair Panty, your carpet can be whatever color you want it to be.”

Like I said, thirsty for attention.

Y’all remember we had the skylights removed in the sunroom. And since we had to have the ceiling replaced, I opted to change the color form the light blue to a more vibrant one and since I was changing that color why not paint over the yellow walls with a more vibrant green.

The new paint choices were taken from the Golden Girls Rattan Chairs we’ve had for eons!

Rosita is confused by the kitchen being empty and the breakfast table in the sunroom and their food dishes in a new spot, too. And so when I came into the living room one morning she was under a chair resting her chin on the stretched bar between the two legs.

She seems spent.

This is Gianluca Vallata. He’s six feet tall. He might be from Istanbul, he might not be. I know nothing about him, but Would You Hit It?

Bobservations

The other night I was cleaning up after dinner and I saw something on the countertop and I politely said to Carlos:

“What in the holy hell is this Jed Clampett, petrified wood  contraption doing on my counter?”

“I was hoping you’d see it.”

“See it, it confirms that we are officially white trash.”

The ‘it’ in question was a whisk that Carlos thought needed a bigger handle so he went into the yard and cut a branch off a tree and turned that into a handle. He then, apparently, used the whisk to stir the Special Roadkill Stew he’d prepared for dinner.

It’s not really much of a struggle for Tuxedo, but he is doing his part and being very patrioti-cat.

It’s kind of shocking that Florida can build a Concentration Camp in the Everglades in four days but can’t help its own citizens in an actual hurricane.

There’s a reason why the “Big Beautiful Bill’s” Medicaid cuts don’t hit until 2027. The GOP planned to blow it up after the Midterms to blame the Democrats whom they are afraid will be taking over Congress.

Don’t forget the truth.

Sometimes, just walking through a meadow in the middle of nowhere you can spot some cakes in the wild.

The other morning after breakfast I was in the bedroom changing into a pair of Causal-Lay-About-The-House-Because-It’s-Sunday-and-I-Want-To-Read shorts … specifically the black ones. I said to Carlos:

“Have you seen my black shorts?”

“I haven’t seen any black shorts in about three years.”

I guffawed.

“Blind humor is funny. But I can’t find my black shorts.”

“Are they in the laund-“

“No.”

“Are they in the hamp-“

“No.”

“Are they in another drawe-“

“No.”

“Are you wearing them already.”

Silence.

“And they call me the blind one.”

Last week y’all weighed in on The Great Kitchen Island Debate going on at Casa Bob y Carlos where Carlos didn’t want his sheet pans stored on the other side of the island from where there are now because he didn’t want to have to walk the 24 inches …

This week I spoke with the cabinet maker and they have faux door panels so we can move the door to Sheet Pan Central to where it’s always been and leave everything else as designed with faux door panels making it all look seamless.

Happy now?

Mexico’s President Claudia Sheinbaum has sent a group of firefighters and rescue personnel to help search for flood victims in Texas. After all the hate from this regime. After all the racism toward brown people from this regime. After all the anti-immigration policies aimed at brown people. She helped. She did the right thing … for a Red state that would never do the same for her.

That’s leadership and power; that’s a woman.

Julian Morris is a 42-year-old British actor who is married to fellow actor Landon Ross and likes taking off his clothes; but enough about that, Would You Hit It?