I Went To Walmart ...

The other day, watching a series of cooking shows on PBS, I watched a fella make a Cranberry Candied Ginger Buckle. For those out of the know, as I was, a buckle consists of fruit and cake baked together, with a streusel topping and, as it bakes the fruit and streusel topping make the cake “buckle.”

We had the cranberries because Carlos makes homemade cranberry sauce every Thanksgiving, so I set out for the rest of the ingredients. Two stores in Smallville and when I asked about Candied ginger all I got were confused looks, a check with someone higher up, and a “We don’t have that.”

Back home, I checked the computer for candied, or crystallized, ginger, and found that it was about three miles away at :::gasp::: Walmart, or twenty-five miles away at Kroger. Now, y’all know how I feel about Walmart, but the reasonable side of my brain, which rarely comes into play, thought, check the closest store first before you drive nearly an hour out and back.

So … I.Went.To.Walmart. Thank the goddess for the mask and a baseball cap, as well as the very early morning hour.

I went into the store and checked the “International” foods aisle, which at Walmart in Smallville, South Carolina, is mainly Avocado Mayo and flavored Ketchup; none. I checked in produce where they have the nuts—and no, not just the people shopping there—and found no candied ginger. I even checked the cany aisle because, Walmart. And then I made my way to customer service where the conversation went exactly like this:

“Hi. Do you carry candied ginger?”

“Gingers in the produce aisle.”

“No, not fresh ginger, but candied ginger,”

“Gingers in the spice aisle.”

“No, not powdered ginger, but candied ginger.”

“Check produce or spices.”

“Thank you so much.”

I turned to leave in a huff, and believe me when I say I give good huff, the woman standing behind me said “Excuse me?”

I thought she knew where candied ginger was, so I stopped, and she said:

“Do you always wear your shirt buttoned all the way up like that?”

I was wearing a denim shirt under a sweater, and yes, I did have the denim shirt buttoned all the way to the top because I like it, so I replied:

“Yes, I do.”

And she said:

“Interesting choice.”

I scanned her from her frizzed dyed blond job, down beyond the caked-on mascara, over the Christmas sweater, below the too-tight yoga pants and stopped:

“Thanks for the fashion advice. Nice crocs.”

Twenty-five minutes later I walked into Kroger, stopped the first person I saw who worked there, and asked about candied ginger:

“Check next to produce where we have all the pre-packaged nuts and dried fruits. It’s on the bottom shelf, about halfway down the aisle.”

Twenty-five minutes later I was home, making a Cranberry Candied Ginger Buckle.

Looks dee-lish, doesn’t it?