A Tale Of Two Restaurants

Last week, out actor Drew Droege and his date were dining at El Compadre in Los Angeles before heading out to a show and felt the sting of homophobia with their meal:

“I went on a really nice date. With a really sad, disgusting, hateful moment in the middle. We had our arms around each other and kissed a few times. A manager approached our table and said something to the [effect] of, ‘You guys can’t do that here. This is a family restaurant.’”

Droege asked if anyone in the restaurant had complained, but the manager snapped back:

“I don’t care if you’re the president of the United States, we don’t allow your behavior here.”

Droege was stunned by those words, and took it to social media:

“The chilling and pointed tone of ‘we’re a family restaurant.’ ‘We don’t allow your behavior here.’ Ever wonder why gay people often seem nervous? Why do we walk faster? Why do we work so hard to please others and be good little citizens in this world?”

After Droege’s post, which tagged El Compadre, the restaurant posted a statement on Instagram, which they later deleted:

“We have read all of your comments and concerns, and we are looking into what happened Monday night at our Echo Park location. While we work to learn more, we want to make it clear we stand with the LGBTQ community and hold no space for intolerance, hate, or unjust treatment of our beloved guests regardless of race, ethnicity, age, gender, religion, sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, disability, or status. We were built off of the core value to do everything with love, and we will do what it takes to continue to warmly welcome any and every guest into a safe community. Please give us time to seek out what happened, gather more information, and take appropriate action. We will update you soon.”

But by Wednesday night, I guess the restaurant had investigated and posted this message:

Droege says he has never been “asked not to show love in public”  though, like all of us, he’s dealt with homophobia all his life; still, he thought that a display of affection in Los Angeles was “a safe thing to do.” And he received all kinds of support since coming forward with the story from actors Matt Bomer, Tuc Watkins, and Leslie Grossman, writer Michael Ausiello, and others who posted messages of support which makes Droege feel a little better:

“Given all this support, I do feel safer and supported. This was one a**hole. This was not the entire restaurant. This is not our city.”

On the other hand … in the middle of America …

In September, award-winning restauranteur Chef Dave Heide closed Liliana’s Restaurant, his popular New Orleans-style restaurant in Madison, Wisconsin. But fear not, the restaurant opened back up this month, after Heidi rebranded the establishment in honor of his recently transitioned son.

Ollie’s Madison is now open for business. In addition to the newly renamed Ollie’s Madison, Heide also owns Saint Charles Station and the non-profit caterer Little John’s, all which are named for his children. Heide says that although COVID changed the restaurant business and inspired the reboot, the primary reason to rebuild was his son Ollie:

“My kiddo doesn’t go by the name that’s on the restaurant anymore. They don’t use that name. They go by a different name. As a dad who loves their kid, to have their deadname on my shirt every day when I come home and their deadname on their restaurant … that’s part of it.”

Heide reopened the restaurant on Ollie’s first birthday, after announcing his son’s transition on social media in December 2020:

“I wanted everyone to meet someone you already know. I introduce you to Ollie Joy Heide. You may have known them as Liliana in the past, but now you may call them Ollie. I am so proud of this human. I have known them as Lily for their whole life, and I look forward to many adventures with this amazing human and having a million new memories with them. I love you Ollie, no matter your name, your gender, or your pronouns. You will always be my kiddo that I am proud of and love.”

And that’s how restaurants are done, and that’s especially how parenting is done.

Welcome out, Ollie.

El Compadre  Ollie's Madison

Bobservations

When we were in Asheville a few weeks ago, after relaxing in the hotel for a hot minute, we ventured out to find a place for dinner. I’d forgotten it was the last Friday night before Christmas so I didn’t think about crowded spots. But we found a couple, and they sounded good, but, you know, the grass is always greener, so we kept walking.

And then we found Cúrate, a tapas restaurant. We love tapas, going back to one of our first dates twenty years ago, so we went in. Cúrate occupied two older buildings on a slight hill, so half the restaurant was up three steps from the other, with a bar running down the center of both buildings. The lower bar was just for cocktails and appetizers, while the upper bar was basically the kitchen bar where you could order the full menu; we took that option.

And, as things happen in bars, and especially tapas bars, you end up chatting with the people around you about the tapas, which is Spanish for appetizer or small bite; like sushi, you share the tapas and order several dishes.

Now, as I like to say, even though it’s not entirely true, I don’t generally like people; really, that means I don’t chat up strangers, even though sometimes I do. Carlos, on the other hand, will talk to anyone about anything, anywhere, anytime, ever.

We took a seat and  I ordered an Albariño, a Spanish wine from the northwest, and Carlos chose Red Sangria. My wine, as I knew, was wonderful, but Carlos’ was amazing; fermented fruit with brandy and juices and red wine. I died.

Right then a couple sat to Carlos’ left and began studying the menu. The women told her date she didn’t know much about Spanish wine and didn’t know what to get; it was then that Carlos turned to her, he does love to talk, and said:

“If you like, try the Red Sangria, it’s delicious.”

The women turned a side-eye to Carlos and said:

“Uh.”

And turned away. Carlos looked at me like a hurt puppy and I wanted to smack that bitch, but my Fabada had just arrived so, you know.

A moment later, after the two spaces next to me emptied, a couple sat on my right. No sooner had their butts hit the seats did the woman look at me and ask what I was drinking, what we’d eaten and how everything as. We sat and chatted food and wine, and watching the guys cook right in front of us, and it was lovely.

Then Carlos said:

“Oh, Mister I-Hate-People made a new friend and this bitch keeps inching away from me.”

I said:

“Can I help it if people like me?”

Luckily our Chistorra & Chips, and the Buñuelos de Bacalao arrived so all chit-chat stopped.

But, if you’re ever in Asheville, try Cúrate; the food is amazing, and the people, well, most people, are nice,

Remember the big kerfuffle about the Buttigieg dinner in the Napa “wine cave”? Remember Elizabeth Warren slamming Pete in that last debate? So do the owners of the wine cave and the hosts of that dinner and they’re here to set Liz straight.

Craig Hall, owner of the cave along with his wife, Kathryn, say they don’t have $900 bottles of wine as Warren  alleged and, in fact, they didn’t even serve their most expensive bottle, which comes in at $350. Oh, and wine caves are actually pretty common in the Napa Valley because they store wine at cool temperatures.

I know because I’ve been in wine caves and eaten lunch in a wine cave.

I don’t mind the squabbling among the candidates, but get your facts straight, Liz, before you take them to the debate stage.

In April 2018 “evangelist” and youth pastor Acton Bowen was arrested and charged with second-degree sodomy, enticing a child to enter a vehicle or house for immoral purposes, and second-degree sex abuse of a male minor under the age of 16.

This week Acton Bowen was sentenced to 1,008 years in prison after pleading guilty to all counts; he was also ordered to pay $840,000 in fines.

Good.

Is it possible that _____ could be impeached by the House again?

Perhaps; House Counsel Douglas Letter said in a filing in federal court that a second impeachment could be necessary if the House uncovers new [more] evidence that _____ attempted to obstruct investigations of his conduct.

Well, he might actually like that because then he could brag that he was impeached twice, more than any other president in History.

Nobody gets impeached like _____.

Oh how I love me some karma.

Recently WWE wrestler Lars Sullivan was fined $100,000 over comments he made on a bodybuilding forum, some of which were called homophobic. They included comments about the NFL quarterback Philip Rivers:

“Philip Rivers = Crybaby b*tch and is extremely gay. Most of California, especially sothern cal, is gay. Fits well. Hell ‘Philip’ is a gay name in itself!@”

This week Sullivan deleted his Twitter account after it was discovered that he had once done gay adult films under the name Mitch Bennett.

Yup. The homophobe did gay porn. Karma. Bitch.

Again, karma.

New York GOP Assemblyman Brian Kolb was arrested and charged with driving while intoxicated following a crash on New Year’s Eve. Kolb ran his car into a ditch in front of his home; no one was injured and no other vehicles were involved.

This is the same week that Kolb penned a column on the evils and the dangers of drunk driving.

Seriously, you cannot make this shiz up.

We just started watching The Crown—Carlos is a huge royal watcher after receiving a response to a letter he wrote Queen Elizabeth when he was a wee queerling—and it’s really very good. Best of all, at least so far, is Matt Smith as Prince Philip. He is rugged, in that pretty boy way; he looks good in uniform, and better still, he looks better out of uniform.

Just sayin’. That is one royal booty.

Random Musings

So a man with a private account posted this to his Instagram yesterday:

“Fantastic day golfing with #45 @realdonaldtrump at Trump Bedminister today. We had an exciting match which came down to the 18th hole. I want to thank my good friend @newyorkrei for setting up such an awesome day. #Trump #POTUS #GOLF #USA #MAGA”

Yes, the day after _____ threatened North Korea with all the fury, fire and poser of this country, he decided to play golf.

So, either the threat was nothing, or this is the most ill-equipped human being to ever sit in the Oval Office.

Either way, get this mother f**ker out. Now.

Last week I saw a movie on TV called ‘The Take.’ It was a story about terrorism in France and the CIA and crooked cops and ... oh, who cares. It starred Idris Elba whom I would pay good money just to watch him stand there.

But, it also starred Richard Madden as Hottie Pickpocket—and I’ll refrain from making a joke about him putting his hand in my pockets ... oops—who also played Prince Charming in the updated Cinderella from a few years back.

I’d like to see this become a sequel because Elba and Madden are scorching onscreen.

Just sayin’.

In Good News For Equality, Bad News For Texas ... The Dallas Stars have become the first professional sports franchise to publicly oppose the state’s “bathroom bill” and have released this statement:

“The Dallas Stars stands strongly opposed to any legislation perceived as discriminatory, including proposed bathroom legislation. Dallas welcomes all, and we welcome all. We are proud of our home and want every visitor to feel safe at home here, too, and that’s why we oppose this discriminatory bathroom legislation.”—Dallas Stars President Jim Lites

Better news ... Texas’ GOP-controlled Legislature failed to pass the bill during a legislative session that ended in May, so Asshatted Governor Greg Abbott convened a special session to revive the issue.

Now, however, it appears unlikely to pass before that special session ends next week.

Better quit before this costs you billions, Texas.

Remember when _____ and his team loved leaks? I mean, as long as the leaks helped them, like when Russia stole Democratic material and shared them with WikiLeaks.

But now that people are leaking unflattering stories about the _____ White House, and we’re learning how easily he lies, they’re not so happy with leakers.

And so _____’s Minister of Propaganda, Kellyanne Conway, is now saying that the White House may have staff members take a lie detector test to determine who is leaking sensitive national security information.

“Well they may – they may not. There are many different ways to discover who is leaking.”

Kellyanne best hope she never takes a lie detector test because the fallout from that explosion could take out half of DC.

Oh, and there’s this, too: last week Conway said that asking prospective White House employees to comply with Office of Government Ethics rules has left many of them “completely demoralized.”

Well, if filing out routine ethics paperwork leaves employees demoralized, I wonder how they’ll feel when Kellyanne slips into her Swastika dress and hooks them up to a lie detector?

Speaking of swastikas ... there is an attempt to reclaim the swastika as a symbol of ... wait for it, it’s both high-larious and disgusting, peace and goodwill by putting it on a T-shirt.

KA Design began marketing the shirts, which featured rainbow-colored swastikas, last month saying they hoped to re-brand the swastika, long associated with Nazis and the Holocaust:

“The Swastika is 5,000 years old, it’s a symbol of peace. It’s a symbol of love, it’s a symbol of life. But one day, Nazism. They took the swastika, rotated it by 45 degrees, and turned it into Hatred, and turned it into Fear, and turned it into War, and turned it into Racism and turned it into Power. They stigmatized the swastika forever. They limited our freedom. The swastika is coming back, together with Peace, together with Love, together with Respect, together with Freedom.”

Oh hell no.

The Auschwitz Memorial Museum criticized KA Design:

“You will not escape from the fact that swastika was turned by Nazis into a symbol of racism, hate, anti-Semitism and mass murder.”

The Israeli Jewish Congress demanded the items be removed from sale:

“It is obscene and disgusting that [KA Design] would seek to profit of this in the name of art, trying to turn this irredeemable Nazi symbol of hate and murder, into a symbol of ‘love and peace.’ They are not unique in this however, with a disturbingly growing pattern in recent years of other clothing companies seeking to do similar. This is not only highly naive, but grossly offensive. Hopefully management will understand the magnitude of their mistake and offense caused, and discontinue these items immediately.”

The Daily Stormer, however, an online community for neo-Nazis and white supremacists, like the idea:

“I want to say that I am in 100% support of the rebranding of the Swastika as a symbol of love. I have been trying to do this for years, and I am thankful that hippies are finally getting on-board with that particular project.”

Let me make this queer for y’all: if you ever find that a white supremacist group or a neo-Nazi organization is ‘pro’ something, then you take a stand against that. I mean, if Nazi’s like it ... ?

Well, there is a thing called Morning Wood and it is the best part of waking up so ... New Kopi Jantan Traditional Natural Herbs Coffee, from Bestherbs Coffee LLC, has been forced to recall a product over fears it causes erections.

The coffee was analyzed by the FDA and they found that it contained a number of chemicals that were “very similar” to those found in Viagra.

WHYYYYYYYYYYY? I mean, if the caffeine in coffee is meant to get me up and going, why can’t coffee get all of me up?

Uh ... asking for a friend.

I need to catch a flight to London because Hottie Brit actor, Jack O’Connell, who I first saw in Unbroken, is onstage as Brick in an updated production of Tennessee Williams’ Cat On a Hot Tin Roof.

And, best of all, the play opens with O’Connell naked in a shower ...

O’Connell says he thought the shower would be offstage and was surprised to learn that, from the jump, he’d be onstage “starkers.”

I am going to see if they need a towel man for that scene.

The other day Carlos and I were headed out and we decided to drop some things off at our local Goodwill store.

I was cruising along and thinking about stopping for gas when Carlos mentioned that I had passed the Goodwill store.

He said we were lucky that he was paying attention and was able to save us some time.

I said we were lucky that this was the first time in seventeen years that he was actually paying attention.

I so hate to be wrong.

And from the Why Say It And Then Say You’d Never Say Such A Thing file ... Oakland A’s outfielder Matt Joyce has faux-pologized for using an anti-gay slur in an exchange with a fan during a game.

As Joyce returned to the dugout, he uttered several profanities at the fan heckling him, and then called him an anti-gay slur and challenged him to fight. Joyce says:

“I was walking back to the dugout and just had a fan yell some vulgar and obscene words. For me, it just wasn’t the right time to say some stuff like that. I fired back, and obviously as soon as you fire back, you regret saying anything, because it’s just not worth it.”

Yeah, not much of an apology, but then he was suspended for two games, without pay, and faux-pologized some more:

“In regard to last night’s incident, I first and foremost want to sincerely apologize to the fans, the Oakland A’s, MLB and the most importantly the LGBTQ community for my comments and actions. A fan yelled vulgar and obscene words about me and my family and I let my frustrations and emotions get the better of me. I am beyond sorry for the inappropriate language that I used and understand and agree that those words should NEVER come out of someone’s mouth no matter the situation. Anyone who knows me will tell you that incident it is not reflective of me as a person, how I treat others, how I live my life and that those hurtful words are not my views. I fully support and hope to help the LGBTQ community with their efforts in being treated fairly and intend to let my actions speak louder than anything more that can be said about this truly regrettable moment.”

Let me make this queer: if those thoughts aren’t in your head, if you didn’t think that the nastiest thing you could say to someone is an anti-gay slur, then you wouldn’t have said it. So save the “this isn’t me” and the “anyone who knows me” bull shiz. You should have said, “Sorry I said it; it was disgusting and I apologize.”

Now go sit down and don’t play ball and don’t get paid. Asshat.

I think I threw up a little in my mouth when I read that Food Network chef, Anne Burrell, will be opening a fine dining restaurant in New York City, based on ... and here’s where I puked ... Cheetos:

“As a long-time Cheetos fan, I’m thrilled to join forces with a snack brand that is truly an iconic American staple. I had so much fun curating this specially crafted, one-of-a-kind menu for the first Cheetos restaurant – I can’t wait to see guests’ reactions!”

I’ve already given my reaction.

Cheetos and fine dining? This place will close faster than Melania’s legs when _____ waddles into the bedroom.

I Hate Loathe People ... And Holly Jones Is Just One Reason Why

Whenever my sister and I would have a conversation and the subject would turn to people behaving badly, I always told her the same thing:

“And that’s why I don’t like people.”

And we’d always laugh about that. But this story is exactly what I’m talking about, and why I loathe … some … people.

After dining at Kilroy’s restaurant on New Year ’s Eve, a woman identified as Holly Jones sent a message to the bar to complain about her terrible experience … and she has a right to do that, you know, but that’s not why I loathe her.

Holly Jones was upset because Kilroy’s manager and staff were too busy with another patron to pay attention to an issue she and her party were having with their bill and so she posted this to their Facebook page:

"I will never go back to this location for New Year's Eve!!! After the way we were treated when we spent $700+ and having our meal ruined by watching a dead person being wheeled out from an overdose my night has been ruined!!! Every year we have come to Kilroys to enjoy New Years Eve and tonight we were screamed at and had the manager walk away from us while were trying to figure out our bill being messed up. The manager also told us someone dying was more important then us being there making us feel like our business didn't matter, but I guess allowing a Junkie in the building to overdose on your property is more important then paying customers who are spending a lot of money!! Our waitress when we were trying to ask about our bill being messed up also said "what do you want me to do f****** pay your bill for you?" What a great way to talk to a paying customer!!! I get that working on New Years Eve a stressful but being a complete b**** to us all night knowing you get an automatic gratuity is not right!!!"

First off, get thee to an English class and learn about punctuation and grammar ... but I digress.

Holly Jones heard that someone in the restaurant was dying and she is upset because she got charged for two Diet Cokes when she only had one … or something as inconsequential? I wonder how she might have felt if she, or another member of her party, was overdosing, or whatever, and the manager said, “Look, gimme a sec. There’s a lady who was charged for a salad she didn’t order and I need to fix that before calling 911.”

Anyway,  Chris Burton, managing partner of the location, responded to Jones’ concerns:

"Thanks for reaching out!

We love feedback, whether it be positive or negative. I especially like feedback like this so others can see the disgusting people that we have to deal with sometimes.

First of all, the "overdosing junkie" that you speak of was a 70+ year old woman who had a heart attack. Thankfully she was finally revived at the hospital and survived. It sounds like you were very concerned about  her so I thought you should know. This poor lady, who was celebrating New Years Eve with her husband and son, had to be placed on the floor of a completely packed bar and have her shirt removed in front of everyone so the paramedics could work on her.

But I can completely understand why you think being intoxicated ***holes that didn't understand your bill should take priority over human life. I especially appreciate you making your server (who doesn't curse) cry as well. I'm sure she really enjoyed working on New Year's Eve just to deal with people such as yourself. I personally had to leave a show to take a phone call from an emotional manager telling me someone died at Kilroy's and that other employees were not doing so well dealing with this. (At the time they didn't know that she was going to make it.) So I understand how inconvenient this was to your night.

But honestly, I'm glad to hear you won't be coming back to Kilroy's because we wouldn't want anyone as cold hearted and nasty as you returning. I appreciate anyone who chooses to spend their money at Kilroy's until they act like you. You can take your money anywhere else after that, and I won't lose a second of sleep over it.

Happy New Year!" 

Oh.Snap. I think I love Chris Burton [left], who says he's surprised that the story's gone viral:

"I've been getting a lot of messages from people especially in the service industry saying that I'm their hero and calling me a crusader and things like that, so it's a little silly but the heroes are obviously the first responders that came and helped her out and saved her life."

Now, Holly Jones, or somebody pretending to be her, later posted that somebody else had hacked or hijacked her account and wrote that nasty review and that she was very upset it was posted; then she deleted her account.

On Monday, Kilroy's asked people not to send messages to people with the same name as the woman on Facebook:

“Please don't send any hateful messages to the other Holly's as they are just innocent locals who happen to share the same name.”

As for the real the Holly Jones, the one who posted that bit of hate on Facebook, she works for Serenity Salon … though perhaps not for long … and now even the Salon has been forced to  issue a statement of their own:

“Serenity Salon is aware of the most recent negative publicity surrounding one of our Booth Rent Stylist. The posting to Kilroy’s Facebook page, allegedly by one of our Booth Rent Stylist, in no way represents the views of Serenity Salon or any of our staff. We are saddened by the events that took place that evening and will continue to pray for the women who suffered a heart attack at this establishment on New Year’s Eve. This was not a company event and no other persons from Serenity Salon were present. This was the actions of one person and again do not reflect our views at Serenity Salon. We take our reputation seriously and this does not align with our code of conduct or the expectations we have for our Staff, Booth renters or any members of our team."

Now, hoping for something good to come out of the situation, Kilroy’s and Chris Burton posted this to Facebook:

How about we make this go viral? The lady survived but has a long way to go. Let's help them out! Also the family has requested not to use her name anywhere so please respect that if you know her.

Thank you all for your support!

And they included a link to a GoFundMe page [HERE] that has, as of this morning, raised $12,000 to cover this unidentified woman’s medical bills; their goal was $5,000, so there are an awful lot of good people out there, and perhaps just a few asshats like Holly Jones.

But what is the takeaway from all of this?

Well, when you are a witness to an emergency, like an elderly woman having a heart attack, maybe try and get the whole story before dubbing her a junkie on Facebook.

Stay off social media when you’re drunk, or when you’re stupid, or when you’re both.

And understand that there are sometimes things more important in the world that your dinner check being “messed up.”

And that, my friends, is why I loathe people.*

*I used to say ‘hate’ but my grandmother taught me to [try and] never say ‘hate;’ I switched, for a time to ‘dislike intensely,’ until settling on ‘loathe.’

I loathe Holly Jones … and people like her.

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