Snarky Thoughts

We learned last week that Madge broke up with her 23-year-old model boyfriend Andrew Darnel and was said to be suffering from the breakup. Luckily, Madge eased her pain by starting to date 29-year-old boxing coach Josh Popper a few days later.

My Thought: She’s resilient, that Madge.

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Rolling Stone‘s 200 Greatest Singers list was a hot mess, first because folks—not me—were horrified that the magazine snubbed Celine Dion. And now we’re learning that Chaka Khan is also annoyed at the list, not just because of her spot there—she came in at #29. During a recent stop at The Originals podcast Chaka wasted no time reading others on the list, and the idea of a list itself:

“I didn’t even know what the hell you were talking about, so obviously this don’t mean a great deal to me. These people don’t quantify or validate me in any way.”

She threw shade all over Mimi, suggesting Carey’s spot at #5 was bought and paid for … “That must be payola or some shit like that.” And when asked about Adele, who also came in ahead of Chaka at 22, Khan just threw up her hands and said: “OK, I quit.”

But she was furious about Mary J. Blige, coming in … again, ahead of Chaka … at #25, saying that when Blige “fucked up” her song Sweet Thing when Mary covered it on her debut album What’s the 411? And then she claimed the judges at Rolling Stone were:

“Blind as a motherfucking bat! They need hearing aids…These must be the children of Helen Keller!”

My Thought: I don’t quite get the idea of the judges being blind, but then I don’t get much of Chaka Khan. I know she sang about being every woman, but she certainly doesn’t care much for every woman.

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Apparently an audience member at former RHONY “star” Luann de Lesseps’ cabaret show was so overcome with emotion by the sheer talent of a reality star that she vomited all over the former Countess.

My Thought: I would think that would be  anormal thing. I mean if you’d heard Luann sing you’d probably blow chunks, too.

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Speaking of former RHONY “stars” Bethenny Frankel, who apparently has nothing going on in her life, so she’s talking, again, about the time she was a contestant on Martha Stewart’s version of The Apprentice an lost, and how, to this day Martha doesn’t like her. Bethenny was a contestant on the show and placed second and says Martha was a big old meanie to her when giving her the ax … though I might have used an actual ax:

“What she said to me when she fired me was insane. She said, “Bethenny, you’re pushy, you’re a show-off and you feel the need to make a physical impression which is not entirely necessary at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia.” …Oh yeah, she hated me. She hated me.”

My Thought: Since I have never heard Marth mention Bethenny once since kicking her off the show, it sure looks like Bethenny’s the butt-hurt one.

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Finally, someone worth talking about … Foo Fighters frontman Dave Grohl spent over 24 hours volunteering at Hope the Mission’s Trebek Center in Northridge, California preparing brisket, pork butt, ribs and more for hundreds of homeless people.

Grohl and his fellow barbecuers took turns smoking the meat overnight even as a major winter storm moved through Southern California, dumping hail and rain and a little snow on the shelter that night. And when dinner was being served, Grohl stayed front and center serving the unhoused community, and posing for pictures with anyone who asked. .

My Thought: He could have sent a check, he could have catered the evening dinner, but he showed up and worked and served to make the lives of many homeless people a little smoother, a little easier, if even for one day.  We should all be like Dave.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

File this under: Obviously.

Jennifer Lopez has taken a break from parading former, now current, fiancé Ben Affleck down every red carpet she can find—seriously, roll out a red carpet in front of your house and she’ll show up—to promote her latest film Marry Me.

JLo in something called Marry Me? God, she is the picture of desperate. I imagine her sitting around with Ben and saying:

"Hey Ben? What’s the name of that movie I just made?”

And Ben says:

“Marry Me."

And JLo shrieks:

“YESSSSSSSSSSS!”

But that’s not far off, because while promoting the film, she was asked if she wanted to get hitched again and, shockingly, she said:

“You know me, I’m a romantic, I always have been ... I still believe in happily ever after, for sure, 100%.”

Jen? Honey? A few times is three, so with Ben …fingers crossed … you’re bordering on several marriages, and so you just know she’ll marry Ben because if she doesn’t how will she get to marriages 5, 6 and 7?

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Goddess this Bitch is so thirsty she makes JLo seem positively arid.

Madonna, still striving to be relevant, has slammed Instagram as sexist after the social media app ALLEGEDLY removed her latest photo shoot without warning because her nipple was showing.

Madge Madge Madge. You reek of desperation because any idiot knows that you can’t show your nipples and yet you go and do it and when the pictures get cut you cry foul. But the best part of all this is she manages to somehow equate her nipple getting cut with … wait for it … Thanksgiving, by saying this:

“Giving thanks that I have managed to maintain my sanity through four decades of censorship…… sexism……ageism and misogyny. Perfectly timed with the lies we have been raised to believe about the pilgrims peacefully breaking bread with the Native American Indians when they landed on Plymouth Rock! God bless America.”

I give thanks to the thought that her nipple was all she showed, until I saw this photo of her best side:

Seriously thirsty this woman. And is it just me or does she remind you of the Wicked Witch of the East after Dorothy's house fell on her?

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No mask? No vaccine? No job.

The ABC soap General Hospital recently terminated to contract of one Ingo Rademacher because he refused to get the COVID vaccination, and now another actor, 51-year-old Steve Burton, has also been let go.

Sorry, not sorry.

But Jason is the height of class and elegance in his firing because in his last appearance on the show he was sitting down and flashing the White Power sign across his knee.

Racist, anti-mandate unemployed tool. Again, not sorry.

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Seriously, these people simply cannot move on … some nine years after calling it quits Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy are still battling it out in court.

While their divorce took eight years to finalize—it’s about a year old now—Frankel and Hoppy will appear before a New York family court judge this week for a hearing involving custody of their daughter, Bryn.

The couple was first granted joint custody back in 2014, though Frankel went back to court in 2017 and was granted sole custody, but the battle raged, and rages, on.

Their daughter is now eleven and by the time these two fools get their act together she will be eighteen and they’ll be no need for custody agreements or parents who were married for two years and fighting about being married for nine years.

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For those of you who believed that so-not-gay Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello were a real couple and truly in love … until they broke up this week …think on this:

Shawn released a break-up ballad mere minutes after the couple split; yes, he wrote and arranged and produced and recorded and released a break-up song with these amazing lyrics while Camilla was still packing:

“If you tell me you’re leaving

I’ll make it easy

It’ll be okay

If we can’t stop the bleeding

We don’t have to fix it

We don’t have to stay”

Even better is that, while Shawn sings [?] about the breakup, he is said to be most heartbroken that Camilla got custody of the dog.

No word on when that song will be released.

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I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

There have long been rumors that Patrick Dempsey’s character was killed off because Dempsey was a total diva and show creator Shonda Rimes was sick of it and canned his ass, and this book  offers confirmation from executive producer James Parriott, who was brought back to the series to oversee Dempsey’s exit.

Parriott says Dempsey was fired due to non-sexual issues like ALLEGEDLY terrorizing the cast so much that they ALLEGEDLY suffered PTSD; Parriott also says Dempsey’s co-star Ellen Pompeo was annoyed by his complaints about “the inconvenience of coming in every day and working.” 

For a paycheck of $400,000 a week.

Looks like someone could have used to GoFundMe GoFuckYourself.

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Filming is over so the fake romance ends.

Mission: Impossible 7 co-stars, Tom Cruise and Hayley Atwell, who never confirmed their totally real and not-at-all-made-up love story, have ALLEGEDLY broken up after less than a year of being “together.”

My condolences to Tommy’s publicist who must now begin the hunt for Tommy’s next “love” interest.

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Seriously, does no one know that you just cannot say whatever crosses your pea brain on social media these days?

Former Real Housewives of New York Bethenny Frankel is fighting to save her podcast, Just B, after broadcasting “transphobic” comments. Frankel got into trouble when she spewed her ignorance about pronouns, gender identity, and how she would not allow her daughter to sleep in the same bunk at a summer camp with a transgender girl. Oh, and Frankel also suggested that gender identity could be a “phase.”

And because her ignorance may cost her a job and Frankel cares more about her coins than offending the LGBTQ+ community, she is trying to get her old boss, Andy Cohen, to help save her show because he’s a gay man with a TV show and a social media following. To his credit, and I do not care for Cohen, he has said nothing, though the first words out of his mouth should be:

“Bethenny Frankel is a media whoring offensive transphobic tool.”

That works for me.

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When Madonna made a surprise appearance at the VMAs earlier this month, a lot of people were shocked by her appearance. To be fair, the old gal rarely makes public appearances other than on her social media in carefully crafted posts that show off her constantly changing plastic surgeried—not a word, but it fits—face and body at its best.

But this week she appeared in public looking, well, sad and frail and kinda pathetic—think female Karl Lagerfeld—to support her Madame X concert-documentary film, which will stream on Paramount Plus next month.

Look, she can do whatever she wants …  chin implants, face lifts, butt implants, new eyes, fuller boobs, but it all just seems so sad and desperate. And then toss  on a “Fuck You” tiara as she totters around like a grandma who misplaced her walker and, well, maybe Madonna could just think about aging gracefully, because if I see her at ninety trying to rock this look again, I will come for her.

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A couple of years ago, rumors surfaced that Jada Pinkett Smith had an extramarital affair with 29-year-old singer August Alsina, who she met through her son, Jaden. She denied the ALLEGATIONS and “husband” Will Smith acted like he wanted to fight Alsina for suggesting that Jada would ever let another man dip his wick into her. But then a few months after that, desperate to make her Facebook talk show Red Table Talk relevant, and with “husband” Will at the table, Jada admitted to an “entanglement” with Alsina.

Cut to this week, and Will Smith, with Apple TV+’s Emancipation, the film King Richard, and a memoir, Will,  to promote, has admitted that Jada cheated on him, but it’s all good because he cheats on her, too, because that’s how they roll.

But he suggests Jada is a cheater, due to her anger that her career took a backseat to his, and to his wants and needs. And all that seems true because this is their life: Jada didn’t want a big, over-the-top traditional wedding, but Will did, so they had one; Jada did not want to move into a massive walled compound, but Will did so they moved into one; Jada’s band, Wicked Wisdom, was offered to open for Guns N’ Roses, but she turned it down because Will was still filming The Pursuit of Happyness; and Will screened a documentary he made about Jada for her 40th birthday party, and she hated it, and accused him of making it purely as a “disgusting display of ego.”

So, Will is a dick, and so Jada went looking for other dick, and Will goes out looking for tricks, too. Look, Will and Jada want an open marriage, that’s their choice, but they each vilified a young man for suggesting that he’d had an affair with Jada and now Will is using that affair as part of  a promotions sweep.

Sounds about as fake as their marriage.

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On this week’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Erika Jayne, while staying at the Fairmont Grand Del Mar in San Diego, sipping champagne after having her glam squad give her hair and makeup,  complained that she is flat broke.

I guess to Erika, who might have been living off money meant for orphans and widows, taking a weekend away from your $9,000-a-month Beverly Hills rental at a luxury resort in San Diego, sipping champagne and having people dress you and comb your weave and slap on your makeup is what one does when they are flat broke.

This bitch needs a lesson in broke and I hope she gets it.

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It's Snarkurday!

Like a certain president, Harvey Weinstein does not know when to shut his piehole and simply read the prepared statement. He’s now claiming #FakeNews to a story that he admitted to giving women roles in his films in exchange for sex. But if you listen to his story, he kinda admits it’s true:

“I was born poor, ugly, Jewish and had to fight all my life to get somewhere … no girl looked at me until I made it big in Hollywood. Yes I did offer them acting jobs in exchange for sex, but so did and still does everyone. But I never, ever forced myself on a single woman.”

He doesn’t seem to get it that telling a woman she has to allow you to get naked and put your cheese-filled body on top of hers and rub your wee willie into her nether regions so she can act in one of your films is kinda forcing a woman to do that very thing; especially when you throw in that “You’ll never work in this town again” business.

The moral: Harvey Weinstein is a pig who’s yet to realize he’s a pig.

Maybe prison will help?

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Remember when it was rumored that Ewan McGregor was bumping uglies with his Fargo co-star, Mary Elizabeth Winstead? And then Ewan admitted he was cheating on his wife? And then he and Mary Elizabeth went public with their affair? And then Winstead broke things off because the press called her a “homewrecker” which is what you call someone who has an affair with a married person and, ahem, wrecks their home? And then Ewan filed for divorce from Eve Mavrakis, his wife of 22 years, and Winstead decided that she wouldn’t be labeled a “homewrecker” any more and went back to Ewan.

Well, Ewan’s 22-year-old daughter, Clara, that’s her up there coming between the lovebirds, decided that Winstead should still wear the Scarlet A and has been trolling the actress on social media. Clara sipped some tea and then dashed over to an Instagram fan page for Mary Elizabeth and commented:

“Most beautiful and talented woman on earth? … Oh man y’all are delusional. The girl is a piece of trash…x”. 

I love the little ‘x’ at the end because it says so much more than ‘kisses’.

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It looks like the No-Longer-A-Countess Luann de Lesseps should have gone to Not Being A Terrible Mother Rehab after she got out of Drunk In Public Rehab.

Luann is now being sued by her ex-husband, Still-A-Count Alexandre de Lesseps and their two children, Victoria and Noel. The three claim that as part of the 2009 divorce settlement, Luann was supposed to have set up a trust for the kids, and when she sold the family home in Water Mill was to put half that money in the trust.

But they say Luann kept the cash for herself … because booze and lawyers don’t come cheap.

Maybe I spoke too soon? The minute I finished writing that snark, I learned that the No-Longer-A-Countess Luann de Lesseps has checked herself back into rehab and will not be at the Real Housewives reunion.

Luann, who has also been accused this month of having an affair with her married manager, will be absent from the show, leaving former foe, former frenemy, and current bestie Bethenny “Never One To Stop Talking” Frankel to speak for her—apparently Frankel has added spokesperson to the SkinnyGirl empire:

“This weekend, Luann was surrounded by her girlfriends and decided—with their support—that in light of recent circumstances, it is the healthiest choice for her not to attend Tuesday’s reunion taping so that she can continue in her healing process. Luann is now surrounded by a core group of people who truly have her best interests at heart and who are working to make sure she gets the help she needs.”

That’s mighty brave … of Bethenny. I mean, it was an entire paragraph and she didn’t mention her contentious divorce, her custody battle, her dead friendship with Carole, or SkinnyGirl, even once.

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Last week, Blake Shelton was performing in concert and announced to the crowd that his guitarist had embarrassed himself in front of 200,000 people by playing the wrong song.

Then, as Shelton does, he embarrassed himself because he fell onstage; he didn’t trip, y’all, he just tumbled. And then said:

“And yes I had been drinking. A lot…”

Boy, I love spending my hard-earned coins from my job as a Walmart greeter to plunk down a hundred bucks to see some drunk guy fall down onstage. I mean, why not save some cash, buy a fifth of bourbon, play Blake’s music in my living room and drink till I pass out.

It’d be the same thing. Amirite?

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I’ve often said I’d marry Matt Lauer just so I could walk away a multi-millionaire when he gets caught being a sexual predator, but that bitch Annette Roque beat me to the punch.

Last I heard, Annette was said to be walking away from Pervy Lauer with four of the family homes and cash winnings of $20 million. Well, the divorce is settled, and it appears that Annette has won $50 million in cash and prizes … a horse farm, a house in the Hamptons, two other homes, and over $25 million in unmarked bills.

The best news? Lauer is said to be furious about the deal because Annette is getting half of his estimated fortune of $100 million.

Oh, Matty, you should’a kept your dick in your pants, your mouth shut and your hands to yourself. Ass.

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This is filed under the You Knew What You Were Getting When You Started Dating a Kardastrophe, AKA the Stop Acting Stoopid file.

Younes Bendjima, Kourtney Kardastrophe’s boyfriend, got his panties in a bunch when he began taking a stroll through his media whore girlfriend’s social media pages and discovered Kourtney loves to show her ass on the internet.

And.He.Was.Shocked. He saw the photo and commented:

“That’s what you need to show to get likes?”

No, that’s what she needs to show so That Woman will cut her a check every month because her only job is as a social media nude model.

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And lastly, let’s end with one of the dumbest people I’ve ever heard of: Wiz Khalifa.

Apparently, he was on some chat show and said that a straight man should never eat a whole banana in public because it’s “sus,” meaning “suspect”, meaning it looks like he has a dick in his mouth.

Seriously. Um, Wiz, eating a banana whole does not make you gay. Taking a banana and shoving it up your ass might mean your gay, though, so be careful about that. M’kay?

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It's Snarkurday!

Anyone who watches The Real Housewives of New York knows that former besties Jill Zarin and Bethenny Frankel had a huge falling out in 2010 and stopped speaking. But this week, when Jill’s husband, Bobby Zarin, passed away, it looked like the fences would be mended.

On camera, at least.

Frankel was in Aspen when she learned of Bobby’s death and chartered a private jet to whisk her back to New York for the funeral, and she arrived just before the start of the ceremony. But Bethenny wasn’t alone; no, she had an entire camera crew from RHoNY following her … at … a … funeral. And even more pathetic, is that Jill Zarin knew they’d be filming at Bobby’s funeral and she was fine with it.

And, naturally, Bethenny Tweeted a photo of she and Jill holding hands:

“Today is a sad day with a silver lining. I laughed. I cried. I saw old faces & watched a family come together surrounding a loss. ‘I have a dream’ that Bobby’s death makes us realize what is important & treat each day as our last.”

Wow, she co-opted Martin Luther King.

Reality stars, like Frankel, and former reality stars like Jill, have zero shame.

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Oops; fashion photographers Bruce Weber and Mario Testino stand accused to sexual harassment of male models.

Last month, a male model named Jason Boyce sued Bruce Weber for ALLEGEDLY sexual harassing him during a photo shoot in 2014.  Since then, fifteen more models have come forward claiming Weber of asking them to join him in private clothing-free “breathing exercises” in which he would ALLEGEDLY guide their hands over his body and vice-versa.

Now, Mario Testino also stands accused of inappropriate behavior by thirteen male assistants and models going back as far as the mid-90s; accusations included subjecting them to unwanted sexual advances, groping, and masturbation. Two former Gucci models claim it was well-known that if you wanted to advance your career, you met with Mario for a nude shoot at the Chateau Marmont.

Weber released a statement:

“I’m completely shocked and saddened by the outrageous claims being made against me, which I absolutely deny.”

Testino’s lawyers also questioned the credibility of the models. You know, blame the victim.

Luckily, many in the fashion industry believe the models and have kicked Weber and Testino to the curb. In fact, brands Michael Kors and Stuart Weitzman both said they will not to work on future campaigns with Mario Testino, while Ralph Lauren, who frequently works with Bruce Weber, announced that they will not do business with anyone who “behaves in a way that compromises” their commitment to a safe work environment.

But best of all is that Anna “Nuclear” Wintour issued a statement denouncing sexual harassment and assault in the fashion world, and announcing Condé Nast would no longer be working with Mario Testino or Bruce Weber.

They pissed off Anna?

Bye Felicias!

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More sexual harassment stories? Matt Damon.

No, he hasn’t been accused by anyone, but when the stories and stories and stories began to break, Matt kinda wished these women wouldn’t talk so much about it.

Now Matt has had a change of tune … and when he was asked what he learned from the whole mess, he said:

“I really wish I’d listened a lot more before I weighed in on this. I think ultimately what it is for me is that I don’t want to further anybody’s pain. With anything that I do or say, so for that I’m really sorry.”

And then he added:

“I should get in the back seat and close my mouth for a while.”

Good on Matt for learning.

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Last week we learned that Mark Wahlberg was paid $1.5 million for ten days of reshoots for All the Money in the World while co-star Michelle Williams earned about a $1,000.

Michelle did the reshoots because she believed in the movie, because she didn’t want to be a nuisance, and because she wanted to “fix” the film after Ridley Scott decided to edit Kevin Spacey out.

Wahlberg just wanted more money and threatened to not do the reshoots if the coins weren’t served up to him; he didn’t care if the movie was saved, he didn’t care about Plummer’s recasting or any of that.

It was cash.

And when it was revealed that Wahlberg’s talent agency is the same agency that represents Williams, and that they screwed her over in favor of MarkyMark, suddenly Wahlberg looked like a greedy self-serving ass…because he is.

And so, after a week of people calling him a douchebag, Wahlberg announced he donate the$1.5 million to Time’s Up.

Oh, Mark, let’s all clap you on the back for doing the right thing, but not because you wanted to do the right thing, but because you were shamed into doing it.

Siddown.

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Selena Gomez’s mom loves to talk and kinda loves throwing her daughter under the bus:

Case in point: Selena recently worked with sexual pervert Woody Allen and when Selena’s mom, Mandy, was asked about that: 

“No one can make Selena do anything she doesn’t want to. I had a long talk with her about not working with [Woody Allen] and it didn’t click… She makes all her own decisions. No matter how hard you try to advise. It falls on deaf ears.”

Well, now Selena and her team want you to know that she donated her salary from the film to Time’s Up, okurrrrr?

After Timothée Chalamet and Rebecca Hall pledged to donate their salaries from Allen’s A Rainy Day in New York to Time’s Up, some fans criticized Gomez for not following suit, and so Gomez, who has yet to make a similar public stand against Allen, had a “source” announce that she “made a significant donation anonymously” to the Time’s Up Legal Defense Fund that “far exceeded her salary for the film.”

Wait. What. She donated anonymously and then released a statement saying she donated?

Selena is trying to have it both ways – she wants to work on Woody Allen films, but not have to explain why she’s working with an accused predator, and then, of all the nerve, she wants to give herself credit for her anonymous, large donation to Time’s Up.

Bitch. Please.

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A little over three months ago, Jane Fonda appeared on Megyn Kelly’s NBC show and threw a shade face at the host for asking about her plastic surgery.

This week, Jane was on the second hour of Today with Lily Tomlin when she clocked Megyn who wasn’t even there!

Hoda Kotb and Savannah Guthrie interviewed Jane and Lily Tomlin about the third season of Grace and Frankie and when Hoda brought up their friendship and wondered how long they had known one another, Lily looked at Jane and said:

“Oh my God… Before your first facelift.”

Jane snapped back:

“Who are you, Megyn Kelly?”

Lily countered:

“Oh, that’s right, I forgot she was the one!”

Both Hoda and Savannah tried to keep from laughing because Megyn Kelly was clearly nearby.

Still, good on Jane and Lily.

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It's Snarkurday!

I guess since Wonder Woman apparently saved the Hollywood box office this year by being one of the biggest films of 2017, it should come as no surprise that WW star Gal Gadot is trying to save Hollywood from at least one sexual harasser: Brett Ratner.

It seems that Gadot has refused to sign on for the WW sequel unless Ratner is removed from the franchise. Gadot, who just last month backed out of a dinner honoring Ratner, is taking a strong stance on sexual harassment in Hollywood and doesn’t want her hit film, or any sequels, to benefit a man accused of sexual misconduct.

Ratner’s production company helped produce WW along with Warner Bros and since the film made some $400 million internationally, Ratner’s company made a healthy profit. A Warner Bros. insider explained:

“Brett made a lot of money from the success of Wonder Woman [and] Gadot is saying she won’t sign for the sequel unless Warner Bros. buys Brett out and gets rid of him.”

Gadot knows Warner Bros. will side with her since it would be hard to have a movie rooted in female empowerment being partially financed by a man accused of sexual misconduct against women, and so this past week, Warner Bros. announced was severing ties with Ratner.

Gadot was right about one thing: hit ‘em in the wallet because that’s where it really hurts.

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Speaking of sexual predators, there’s a new one:

Benny Medina, right, who manages both JLo and Will Smith, is accused of attempting to rape Sordid Lives actor Jason Dottley, left in 2008.

Dottley told The Advocate he met Benny Medina at an LA bar with fellow actor T. Ashanti Mozelle and then the three returned to Medina’s home. While Mozelle was in the pool, Dottley claims Medina gave him a tour of the house that ended up in his bedroom:

“We literally got to the door and he grabbed me by the chest of my shirt and threw me onto his bed [and] stuck his tongue down my mouth.”

Dottley, who is openly gay and was married to Queer As Folk writer Del Shores at the time, says he told Medina to stop by pointing out he was married, but the more he resisted, the more aggressive Medina became. Medina ALLEGEDLY forced Dottley, who begged him to stop, down onto the bed:

“His forearm was bearing down on my neck so hard that I don’t know how much longer I would have remained conscious.”

It ended when Mozelle burst in the room and told Medina to get off Dottley. Both men say Medina then grabbed Dottley by the shirt and shoved him toward the door saying:

“You two get the f**k out of here.”

Dottley also ALLEGES Medina further tormented him, texting when he saw him on the street with Shores:

“Is that the husband I have to have killed to have you?’”

Naturally, Benny Medina isn’t speaking.

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On to another ALLEGED creeper, one Mariah Carey, who recently fired her longtime manager Stella Bulochnikov. Was it a power play, or a passion play, because according to rumors it was none other than Mimi’s back-up-dancer-turned-boyfriend, the years younger, Bryan Tanaka, who got Stella axed because, not only did Tanaka want Stella gone, he also wanted her job.

A source—and it’s clearly Bryan Tanaka—says:

“Bryan is behind the whole split between Mariah and Stella. Bryan believes that he should be the one running Mariah’s day-to-day life, and he’s been orchestrating Stella’s exit for a long time. No one enjoys working with Stella. There’s no secret that some people are happy she’s out of the picture.”

It’s shades of Britney and Kevin, or, better still, Margo and Eve. And I think I’ve seen this film before, with Bette Davis … and we all know how that ended.

Poor Eve.

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Now another tale of sexual harassment in Hollywood only this really is nothing new ... It appears John Travolta isn’t always faithful to Kelly Preston … say whaaaaaat … and is accused … again … of putting the squeeze on yet another male massage therapist, this time in Palm Springs back in 2000.

Now, to be fair, accusation that Travolta gropes the groper, er, massage therapist, are as old as, well, John Travolta’s first rug, but this time there is a police report from the time that John Travolta’s “Olivia Pope”—Jonathan Krane—that seems to spill the tea.

In the report, the unnamed says that, while getting a body scrub treatment, Travolta ALLEGEDLY told the masseuse he was “very attractive” and that he’d gotten Little Johnny “very excited.” Travolta exposed his wee Johnny and then prattled on and on about all sorts of gay fantasies he’d like to share with the masseuse, and then told the man to join him in the steam room, dropped his towel and tried to grope the massage therapist.

The man was sickened—and who wouldn’t be—and tried to leave as Travolta kept making nasty comments like if he’d “ever had his a**hole licked buy another man” and “what would he do it he ever had a sexual encounter with another man” and, if so, “tell him what he would do, so [Travolta] could have something to fantasize about.”

That’s the story, but there’s a little more; Jonathan Krane’s old diaries detail how he told John to flee the hotel after the masseuse left:

“[I] persuaded the hotel it was in their best interest to get their employee to drop the criminal charges, and any civil claims, and to persuade the police not to investigate because it was just a misunderstanding.”

You know, how you grope a man while asking to lick his nether regions is always just a misunderstanding.

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In the STD Pool this week we have The Weeknd and Yovanna Ventura, a 21-year-old model from Miami. Yovanna was quite cozy The Weeknd at both French Montana’s birthday party last week and when they went out clubbing the following night. Now, that’s not bad really, except …

Yovanna used to date Justin Bieber who just got back together with Selena Gomez who just broke up with The Weeknd.

And now I have a rash … down there.

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Is ARod afraid of what JLo might do to BFra? Or to him?

See, last week Alex Rodriguez was shooting a commercial in an apartment across the hall from Bethenny ‘BFra’ Frankel’s home and ARod ALLEGEDLY hid to avoid talking to her.

Why? Oh, cuz ARod and BFra were an item for about a half minute last year and we all know how jealous JLo can be. And that’s clearly why, when Frankel appeared in the hallway on the way to her own home, ARod tried to “lunge for the apartment” where the shoot was set up.

ARod is whipped by JLo and is in fear of BFra, I’m guessing.

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The shocking things isn’t that Diana Ross lost her fanny pack while shopping and a good Samaritan turned it in; the shocking thing is that Diana Ross wears a fanny pack, followed by the more shocking news that she was shopping at Marshall’s.

Hey, Diva likes a discount, m’kay? And Ross Tweeted her gratitude to the nameless angel:

“Thank U to the Angel I lost my fanny pack in Marshall’s in LA on Olympic & someone turned it in. What a blessing. Again this morning I’m so grateful. I will ‘pay forward.”

No word on what a Diana Ross fanny pack might look like—feathers? Beads?—but I’ll end with Andy Cohen’s take on it:

“The only thing that would make this story better is knowing that Diana Ross shops at Marshall’s and Penny Marshall shops at Ross.”

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