I Didn't Say It ...

Chris Wallace, FOX News anchor and moderator of last week’s presidential debate, on those wearing masks in the hall:

“The interesting thing though, however, was, the Cleveland Clinic that set up the safety rules said everybody in the hall with the exception of the president, the vice president, and myself had to wear a mask. When Mrs. Biden, came in, when members of her party came in, they were all wearing masks. They kept them on throughout the debate. Mrs. [Melania] ______ came in wearing a mask but took it off once she sat down. I didn’t see when they came in, but all the other members of the first family that I saw there, including Ivanka, Tiffany, when they sat down, they weren’t wearing masks. I’m told by the pool of reporters who was there that somebody from the Cleveland Clinic came up to the first family—I believe this was before Mrs. ______ sat down—and offered the masks in case they didn’t have them, and they waved them away. And people in the hall did notice that while they were all wearing masks, including my wife and four of my children, that the first family did not wear masks during the debate. When it ended, Mrs. ______ came up to go on the stage. As I think everybody saw, she was not wearing a mask.”

Ignorance runs rampant in that family.

photo

Colin Jost, SNL Weekend Update host, on _____’s Tweets from the hospital where he ALLEGEDLY being treated for COVID-19:

“I will say, that despite everything ______ actually seems to be in good spirits. He tweeted a message that said, ‘LOVE!!!,’ and three exclamation points so it sounds they’re cutting his hydroxychloroquine with a little bit of molly. Just hours ago, Trump released a video from the hospital saying he’s in better health, which is great news. Though I will point out that if the situation were reversed, and it was Biden who got sick, ______ would 100 percent be at a maskless rally tonight getting huge laughs, doing impressions of Biden on a ventilator.”

And while Jost was making a joke, you know that _____ would be doing exactly that.

Sidenote: Colin really revs my engine.

photo

Greg Gutfeld, Fox News host , on ______ being hospitalized with the virus:

“The reason why he didn’t hide from the virus is he didn’t want America to hide from the virus. If he was going to ask America to get back to work, right? To get back to work and experience a risk, he was going to do the same thing. He was going to walk out there on that battlefield with you, and not sit somewhere in a basement and tell you how, you know, how you got to get back to work but not go out himself. So, I think he put himself on the line, and the flaw being that as an optimist, as somebody who’s trying to convey a message that we’re going to get through this, and things are going to be better, he had to walk that walk. He had to do that. He could have scared the crap out of everybody, but he refused, and it goes back to his original point about trying to make sure the positive attitude is maintained along with a sense of concern. So, he took the risk, he got the virus, but it’s because he was doing it for us.”

Seriously, the goose-stepping those pandering fucks at Fox do has reached a new low.

He lied about the virus for months while hundreds of thousands of Americans died, and six million got sick, and when he gets the virus it’s for us?

Fuck off, hack.

photo

_____, on Fox News, saying he will not do a virtual debate:

“That’s not acceptable to us. … I’m not gonna do a virtual debate. I’m not going to waste my time on a virtual debate. That’s not what debating’s about. You sit behind a computer and do a debate. It’s ridiculous. And then they cut you off whenever they want.”

So, he wants the freedom to lie and interrupt and cheat and when he can’t get it, he stays home? Good, because I’d hate to see him infect anyone else with COVID-19 …or his stupidity.

Or maybe he’s just chicken.

photo

Pete Buttigieg, on Fox News, asked about Kamala Harris’s position on Medicare but doing an about face to nail Pence for his hypocrisy:

“There’s a classic parlor game of trying to find a little bit of daylight between running mates. And if people want to play that game, we could look into why an evangelical Christian like Mike Pence wants to be on a ticket with a president caught with a porn star … or how he feels about the immigration policy he called unconstitutional before he decided to team up with Donald _____. If folks want to play that game we can do it all night but I think what most Americans want to hear about is are our families going to be better protected than they have been by this president who has failed to secure America in the face of one of the most dangerous things ever to happen our country.”

I love that Pete goes on Fox News and speaks truth to power …even if they don’t get it.

photo

Anne Heche, trying to revive her failing career by appearing on Dancing with the Stars[?], and talking about her life with Ellen and how terrible it was … for her:

“In 1997, I met Ellen DeGeneres at the Vanity Fair party and that was the night that changed my life forever. My movie premiere for Volcano, I had told them that I was taking Ellen as my date and I was told if I took Ellen I would lose my Fox contract. At that moment, she took my hand and said, 'Do what they say,' and I said, 'No thanks.' I took Ellen to the premiere and I was ushered out by security before the movie even ended and was told I was not allowed to go to my own after-party for fear they would get pictures of me with a woman… She was warning me, 'This is going to happen.' … the stigma attached to that relationship was so bad that I was fired from my multimillion-dollar picture deal and I did not work in a studio picture for 10 years.”

It wasn’t the stigma attached to that relationship, it was the stigma of being openly gay, which you were when you were with Ellen, and then weren’t when you were found in the dessert, incoherently mumbling about UFO’s and shiz, and when you weren’t when you married your husband had a baby, and cheated on him.

You are the maker of your own mistakes Anne, and it had nothing to do with Ellen and everything to do with you.

photo

Patti LuPone, Broadway legend and diva extraordinaire, Twitter slammed _____ for his balcony performance after leaving the hospital:

“I still have the lung power and I wore less makeup. This revival is closing November 3rd.”

Goddess I adore me some La LuPone! And I love Twitterers who have now taken to calling _____ “Covita’!

photo