Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Just For Giggles: The Raise*

The Employee: Excuse me sir, may I talk to you?
The Boss: Sure, come on in… What can I do for you?
The Employee: Well sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this prestigious firm for over ten years.
The Boss: Yes.
The Employee: I won't beat around the bush. Sir, I would like a raise. I currently have four companies after me and so I decided to talk to you first.
The Boss: A raise? I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time.
The Employee: I understand your position, and I know that the current economic down turn has had a negative impact on sales, but you must also take into consideration my hard work, pro-activeness and loyalty to this company for over a decade.
The Boss: Taking into account these factors, and considering I don't want to start a brain drain, I'm willing to offer you a ten percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time. How does that sound?
The Employee: Great! It's a deal Thank you, sir!
The Boss: Before you go, just out of curiosity, what companies are after you?
The Employee: Oh, the Electric Company, Gas Company, Water Company and the Mortgage Company!

*via Round-The-Way-Gay, Neal


Biki said...


Mitchell is Moving said...

This is great! (And if only negotiating for a raise were this easy...)