Saturday, May 12, 2012

I Ain't One To Gossip, But....

There have been stories for years about John Travolta’s ALLEGED homosexuality. 
I mean, it was back in the 80s, I think, that a gay porn star said the two men had a little something going on.
And then there was that sweet little lip lock John gave his pilot whilst boarding a plane. It looked a little too....too, if you get my meaning.
Of course, then came Robert Randolph’s book, You’ll Never Spa In This Town Again, about Travolta’s ALLEGED gay spa adventures. Randolph claimed Travolta had a “thing” for young, dark, lithe men, and that Travolta has had between six and fifty gay lovers through the years. That is some span.
And now this: Travolta is being sued by a male masseur who claims Travolta groped him in the middle of a massage. The masseur is seeking $2 million in punitive damages; that’s is one expensive rubdown.
Here’s the story—as told by the masseur: Travolta saw the masseur’s ad online and scheduled an appointment for $200 an hour. They met by car, and the masseur followed Travolta to the Beverly Hills Hotel, where John has his own bungalow.
Once inside, John shucked his clothes, and, well, the masseur says John was already, um, er, “excited”.
There was an hour of ordinary massage, and then, again ALLEGEDLY, Travolta began touching the masseur in the um, er, “swimsuit area.” And, then came some, um, rigid exposing of the star's member, and shrieks from masseurs, and so on.
Now, on the flip side, Travolta says this never happened and can prove he wasn’t even in LA on the day he ALLEGEDLY groped a masseur, and showed off his hard Travolta to anyone.
But there's more………

But, first, let's check in on Amanda Bynes, AKA Lohan2.0.
We all know that Bynes has become the new Lindsay, partying and drinking and crashing cars like that's what normal folk do on a weekend.
I mean, she was arrested and charged with DUI, after she crashed into a police squad car. And, moments after being bailed out, she tried to get back into the club where  she'd had those ALLEGED drinks the night before.
Days later she was outside the Chateau Marmont, ALLEGEDLY drinking whilst driving, and definitely texting while driving, and backing her car over a curb in the process.
Now, Lohan2.0 was involved in another hit and run in Hollywood, only this time she didn't hit a cop. But she did sideswipe a man with her Range Rover.
According to the man, when the Lohan2.0 SUV did not stop, he immediately called police, and then, and I love this, he began to follow the SUV.
Police responded to the scene, and even a helicopter was dispatched--shades of Original Recipe Lohan's carjacking of 2005--and when the SUV was finally stopped it was none other than Amanda Bynes at the wheel.
To be fair, and I love being fair to drunken, self-indulgent Hollywood has-beens, there was minimal damage to Bynes' car, so maybe she didn't feel the impact; or, maybe, ALLEGEDLY, she was too drunk? Just sayin'.
Law enforcement sources say Lohan2.0 was very cooperative with police and exchanged information with the other driver. She was not cited and there will be no further investigation.
Until she does it again, and y'all know she will.

Meanwhile, back at TravoltaGate.
Now comes word that Travolta is being sued by a second masseur.
And this man also claims that Travolta got quite handsy--and more--during a massage at “an unspecified resort in Atlanta, Georgia on January 28, 2012.” 
Second Masseur has hired the same lawyer as First Masseur, and here's his tale of Travolta-groping:
He claims that during a deep tissue massage, Travolta started, um, er, jerking off.  
Second Masseur says, “Sweat was pouring down Travolta’s neck, and he asked Plaintiff again to say something nice to him.” 
Gimme a minute.......eeeeewwwwww.
He also says Travolta was begging him to do some extra "work" on his glute, and that, while "working the glutes," Travolta tried to, um, er, maneuver his his butt in a certain way to ensure… 
I'm gonna stop there.
After that, Travolta ALLEGEDLY grabbed the masseur and groped him.
And, it seems, that Travolta has a reputation in the Massage World as a groper. Second Masseur says he asked a co-worker to take the in-room massage but the co-worker refused because “Travolta has been banned from a spa that the coworker used to work at in Los Angeles.” 
And it gets worse; after Second Masseur was ALLEGEDLY assaulted, he complained to his bosses, who did nothing. And then Travolta ALLEGEDLY--Oy, will I run out of 'ALLEGEDLY's on this story--demanded that Second Masseur come back and “finish” the job.
He refused. And wants $2 million in compensation.
Travolta can’t claim he was out of town this time, because he was in Atlanta, working on Killing Season with Robert DeNiro. 
Now, I’m not saying these stories are true, but, um, er,  there has been a long history of nagging Travolta Is Gay stories, and, well, there are rumors that a third man will come forward to say Travolta groped him on a cruise ship in 2009.
Someone needs a time out, Johnny.

So, there was this big gala in NYC this week; the Met Gala.
It's all about fashion and stuff. They call it the Oscars of Fashion. M'kay....whatever.
But Vogue magazines Bitch-In-Chief, Anna Wintour, is in charge of the guest list and, well, Anna, ain't playing.
See, folks were all surprised that....Look! She's everywhere! Look! She's dating Kanye!....Kim Kash Kow Kardashian wasn't at the Met Gala and rumor has it that it was because Dame Wintour loathes her.
Now, if she was just plain Annie Wintour of Muncie, Indiana, she'd hate Kim, but she's a big deal and they say loathe.
It seems, according to gossip, and gossip is all true, that KKKK makes Anna Wintour's overly Botoxed skin crawl, so she didn't get an invite. But.....Kim’s new f**k-buddy, and fellow famewhore, Kanye West, was at the Met Gala.
Even dating Kanye, right on the heels of the end of her seventy-two-minute marriage, doesn't get Kim an invite.
This story makes me like Anna Wintour a little bit more.
A little bit.

Okay, The Voice.
I don't watch, but apparently, one of Adam Levine’s contestants, Tony Lucca, sang a rock version of Jay-Z’s “99 Problems” on Monday night, and after his performance, drunken judge Christina Aguilera belittled him for singing a song that some consider derogatory toward women; it contains the word "bitch" although the word wasn't used on the show--Lucca substituted the word "Mmmm'.
Christina slurred “Your beautiful wife and your daughter and family are here tonight, and I just thought, you know, the lyrical connotation was a little derogatory towards women, but all-in-all, it was good fun.” 
When Levine--and I'm no fan of Pull-Out Birth Control Levine--tried to explain that the song was about dealing with adversity, Christina said was about problems with women and the two got into an argument.
I'm right.
No, you're not.
Yes, I am.
No, you're not.
Blah blah blah.
But, ALLEGEDLY, Christina has had issues with Lucca, a fellow Mouseketeer alum, in the past. And having Justin Timberlake Tweet his support for Lucca ALLEGEDLY did not sit well with Drunkulera.
And now folks are saying that Levine had Lucca sing that song as a message to Aguilera for giving Lucca a hard time. Aguilera supposedly was “highly offended” and blew up about it during rehearsals. Adam and Christina got in a big fight, with Adam calling Christina the c-word and Christina demanding Adam be fired. 
Well, I say scrap the whole singing shiz, slap some gloves on Pull-Out-Birth-Control and Drunkulera and let them go at it.
That's Must See TV.

So, we had the whole John Travolta Is Gay stories, so why not have a Tom Cruise Is Gay story too.
No, he isn't groping male masseurs--not that we know of--but he does want to be a, wait for it....picture Martin Short in Father Of The Bride...wait for it, wedding planner.
He is so excited that his out of the spotlight daughter, Isabella, is dating a lovely love Scientology robot, that he’s promised to arrange the entire wedding and the honeymoon.
So, if he gets his way, when, or if, nineteen-year-old Isabella walks down the aisle with twenty-five-year-old music composer Eddie Frencher, the flowers will be Tom, the music will be Tom, the dress, will be, well, you know, Tom.
Cruise family insider--and, by insider, I mean Katie, screaming for help--says, “Tom wants to arrange everything for Isabella. He basically handpicked Eddie as a boyfriend for his daughter [and now] he wants his daughter to get married to him — and, in return, he’d not only pick up the entire cost of the wedding and honeymoon, but he’d even arrange everything for the happy couple!"
The flowers.
The seating.
The music.
The Bachelor party?
Just sayin'.
Tom really should think about keeping his hands to himself.
Sigh, allegedly.


kathy said...

Anna Wintour scares me!!

designing wally said...

John-John is such a mess when it comes to his own sexuality, it was bound to come back and bite him on the ass. Then again, ass biting might turn him on...

Who knows?

Anonymous said...

Did Empress Anna have her entourage carry her up the stairs this year? Can we get Tim Gunn to corroborate this?

Joy said...

What I don't understand is why someone with John Revolta's resources gropes anyone not willing to participate. Same when Al Gore was accused of this with a woman. Why take those risks or is that part of it? Or do they think anyone would be honored and thrilled to be mauled by them? Weird.

Joy said...

Also there are fake massage therapists who do this kind of thing. Real ones can lose their licenses and don't want to anyway. I hear this from my massage therapist.

mrs.missalaineus said...

joy- it's because they are so into their own head trip they can't conceive that someone would have the gall to not be interested in servicing them. classic textbook narcissism.


Ask the Cool Cookie said...

Anna Wintour should get the Congressional Medal of Honor for refusing to yield to Kim "Media Whore" Kardashian. Someone has to step up (or in Anna's case, slither) to the alter of the Kardashian and say enough is enough. Well I say for this, Anna Wintour is "Tits".

Stephen said...

I am perfectly willing to give the star of Saturday Night Fever a special massage...

Biki said...

Allegedly one of the best gossip posts written by you ever! But yeah, travolta is just ewwwwwwwwwww. Great post, as usual, keep us umm well...posted on anything new on mr. revolting.

Tivo Mom said...

remember when Amanda Bynes aka Lohan 2.0 was a sweet young thing? Weren't there rumors about Johnny and one of his co-stars? This whole thing made me laugh and cringe at the same time. That means it was a good post...