Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Design Star: Finally! Er, The Finale.

So it's over.
Boo-hoo. I'm heartbroken. Not.
Meg won. Let's just get that out of the way. Meg won, and as Julia Roberts said to the shopgirl in Pretty Woman, "Big mistake! Huuuuge!"
And, from the looks of it, HGTV already knows it, but more on that later.
The Final Two were tasked with creating a pilot of their HGTV show, and working with real clients in real spaces--something I think they should have been doing all season, but then I'm not an HGTV exec.....yet.

Karls' show was "Inspired Design" and there was some inspiration in his living room, and there were some mistakes, too.
The couple wanted an entry, they didn't want to just walk into their living room. But Karl missed that opportunity to create some sort of see-through storage center that could be set beside the door and formed a separate mini-foyer. Instead, he just put  a storage cabinet along the wall, so you still jump right in the room.
I loved the architectural detail above the windows, and how he got his inspiration from the buildings in the neighborhood. I loved the high-molding and the two paint colors that define the space. I didn't love the idea of family photographs placed on that molding so they are nine feet high, and well over most people's heads.
But still, Karl had a hard task. His homeowners wanted Tuscan colors with a grungy urban vibe. I'd say, "Move to Italy and live under a bridge" which is probably why I don't have my own HGTV show.....yet.
The armoire turned out cool, I thought, though it seemed out of place on that long wall by itself. That whole space seemed like a wasted opportunity to create a much larger focal point, maybe carrying the graphic onto the wall. I dunno, I just didn't get it.
I guess I wasn't inspired. Even though I liked his room better than Meg's......

Meg turned all "Design Crimes" on us, and hunched over and growled and cruised the streets of Harlem looking to score a meal. All she needed was a trenchcoat and a cigar and it would have been perfect.
I don't get the design panel. They love her on camera when I think she looks like a bulldog, ready to attack. She is so 'in your face' that I find myself leaning away from the TV when she's on camera.
And her challenge was to create a living dining space, with Tiffany Blues and warm leathers. She did ice gray blue and a beige leather sofa. A dark wood table with beige chairs. There was a lotta beige in that room, and it looked more corporate board room that living room.
And what's with the scattered pictures on the wall, hung nine feet in the air? Seriously, that's a crime worthy of life imprisonment.
And why on earth would you place a huge Buddha on a flimsy stand in a house where people are having a baby. Baby pancakes anyone? I guarantee the homeowners moved that thing to a safer location as soon as Meg left.
And "Design Crimes"? Really? Like I want some cigar-chomping-Broderick-Crawford-In-A-Helen-Lawson-Wig coming into my home and telling me I've committed a design crime? I have a list of crimes Meg commits every moment of every day. But the design panel thought her "crimes" idea was adorable.
The folks at HGTV, however, apparently did not, because the instant the show ended, the ad for Meg's new show came on and it has been renamed HGTV Great Rooms.
How generic.
Which, I think  is what we'll get from Meg.
Generic. HGTV hasn't come up with a real Design Star who can carry their own show since David Bromstad. I think it's time they get out of that business. It's over.
Er, finally.
Bye Karl, I'll miss your jeans and your girly giggle.


froggy said...

I wonder if they specify that you will get a *chance* at a show - if your numbers are low you are out of here!
I always notice many more things from the rooms from your recap. Usually the room reveals go by so fast that who can tell?

diatribesandovations.com said...

Spot on observations once again! Frankly, I'm glad this one is over. I didn't really like any of them this season. Sometimes I think there are just too many of these shows on the air already. (I can only stand to watch other people shop and paint walls for so long.) Candace Olsen and Sarah Richardson are the only ones that I enjoy on a consistent basis.

Mitch Block said...

I never ever watch these shows. But I truly enjoy your critiques, which make me very happy to never ever watch these shows! And I am in complete agreement with you about Meg's living/dining space. YOU should be on the show. I would definitely watch.

Miss Lisa said...

Haven't seen it yet but first reaction: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I do love imitating Meg's voice though, which sounds like Lumpy Space Princess: http://youtu.be/mpkA68MEkJ4

Thanks for the recaps and your patience with the wayward HGTV. Do they want to attract a larger male audience? Do they want to hang on to their middle-class conventional audience? Do they want edgy, in-your-face, or phony reassuring consumerism in the guise of design? They don't know and neither do we.

paul said...

We all knew that Meg would win the way the judges gushed over her. She won't last long. It appears I'm in the minority, but I think Karl had a good chance of becoming another David B.

Anonymous said...

Spot on... maybe you should be a judge for the next Design Star. HGTV needs some new management and better perspective. Fire Genevieve and Vern. You are hired!

And - btw - I won't be watching anything from 'i can't design' and 'yes i'm annoying' amy!

Joy said...

Meg's voice grates on all my nerves! I can't stand listening to her. And yes she does resemble a bulldog when she gets all crime detective on us. This show has outlasted its welcome for sure. Good recap! Karl should have won instead of Meg.