It's Snarkurday!

Sarah Jessica Parker has been accused of a lot of things … she’s wound awfully tight … she can be a huge bitch … and she’s a snobby shoe saleswoman … but is she also … shades of Lohan … a jewel thief?

Maybe so; it seems SJP is being accused by jewelry brand Kat Florence Design of stealing accessories worth $149,501.96.  And you know they mean business because they nailed it down to the penny!

Kat Florence Design ALLEGES that Sarah borrowed some pieces from them in 2016 for after wearing the jewels in a photo shoot and never gave them back. They say SJP asked to “personally borrow several pieces of the jewelry to wear for a few months and then return all the pieces.” They agreed to two months and now it’s been two years that Parker has had the gems, so Kat Florence filed a lawsuit in April; the company’s attorney had this to say:

“It is our position in this case that after a photo shoot as part of the endorsement agreement, Ms. Parker requested that she could personally keep some of the pieces of the jewelry for a few months to wear personally. We agreed and documented what she had. This happened in March 2016. Over two years later, the jewelry was never returned to us. We believe that as Ms. Parker has kept the jewelry since 2016 that she should pay us for it.”

Well, SJP is shocked, shocked I say … or at least her attorney is because he said:

“This is just plain false. SJP was under contract to Kat Florence and was asked to keep the jewelry so that she could wear it on red carpets and other events when appropriate. Sarah Jessica Parker is as honest and trustworthy a person as anyone I have ever met. She has never and would never hold onto anything belonging to someone else. In fact, she has been asking ever since Kat Florence wrongfully stopped paying her to have the pieces returned, but Kat Florence didn’t seem terribly interested in getting them back.”

Um, ambulance chaser? They wouldn’t have asked for all their money back, to the penny, if they weren’t interested in getting it back; and what do you think they do, allow celebs to just take jewelry and wear it and never pay for it?

That’s some business model.

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This year’s New York Fashion Week, save for the Cardi B—the ‘B’ is for Brawl—fight with Nicki Minaj, was pretty dull as fashion weeks go, but there was another bit of drama.

Marc Jacobs normally gets to be NYFW’s big “closer” but this year the honor went to Rihanna’s Fenty show and it looked like Marc Jacobs ALLEGEDLY turned it into a pity petty party.

Jacobs’ runway show was set to start at 6PM but for some reason was delayed for ninety minutes, leading many to assume the designer was simply out to ruin Rihanna’s show. See, Jacobs shows typically run like clockwork, but this year, with Rihanna snagging the grand finale did Jacobs delay his Manhattan show so people wouldn’t be able to get to Rihanna’s Brooklyn show by its 7:30 PM start time?

Booth Moore, from the Hollywood Reporter, tweeted about Jacobs’ delay, sharing an image of some of the designer’s empty front-row seats as many in attendance, annoyed by the late start, beat feet to Rihanna’s gig. Still, many celebs stayed to await the late Marc Jacobs, including Nicki Minaj, Emily Ratajkowski, Sofia Coppola and Anna Wintour, although Nuclear Wintour was seen pacing and making phone calls before finally taking her seat as the show started.

Jacobs took to Instagram, as they do these days, to explain his tardiness:

“I sincerely apologize to anyone and everyone who was inconvenienced by my lateness at our Spring/Summer 2019 fashion show. For anyone interested, below is not a list of excuses but rather a list of facts. I fully understand people have plans, lives, commitments, flights, families to return to, etc and that I fully RESPECT …

1. The night before the show at midnight, I believed that we would absolutely be starting at 6pm, as planned and it was my intention to do so. 

2. At 3:30pm on the day of the show, I became aware that we would most likely be an hour late. In good faith and hope it was communicated that the show would start at 630pm and that was a mistake. 

3. After years of being beyond punctual and once again, with every intention of remaining so, the fact is, more is always expected from us with fewer and fewer resources. That is not unique to me personally or us as a company. I have learned that I need to adjust to our realities.

4. It was my wishful thinking that we could accomplish all that needed to be done for this show with the circumstances we faced. I was wrong. Not because everyone didn’t make every effort or give it their all and more, life is just that way sometimes. I’ve always been told that, “if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” With our shows, I always strive to present 7-10 minutes of live fashion theatre that hopefully makes some kind of statement or touch the audience in some way both aesthetically and emotionally. I think we all have to be a little more sensitive and flexible to the fragile state of the live experience. 

I hope anyone reading this will reflect on my thoughts as I have on yours. 
Sincerely and respectfully,

Marc”

Notice, though, that all his explanations never fully explained why he was late. My money is on the diva-ness of it all, given that he was always the closer and now that upstart Rihanna has taken his place.

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I’ve talked Les Moonves before, and what a pig he is to women in general, Janet Jackson, in particular, and now how much of a misogynistic pig he was to Linda Bloodworth Thomason.

She’s the creator of Designing Women, and was, for a time, one of the most powerful women in television. She had a great contract with CBS and lotsa support from CBS executives … until Moonves was made president. Now Bloodworth Thomason has written a piece for The Hollywood Reporter about how Moonves ruined her career because she’s a woman and he hates women:

“This is not the article you might be expecting about Les Moonves. It’s not going to be wise or inspiring. It’s going to be petty and punishing. In spite of my proper Southern mother’s admonition to always be gracious, I am all out of grace when it comes to Mr. Moonves. In fact, like a lot of women in Hollywood, I am happy to dance on his professional grave. And not just any dance — this will be the Macarena, the rumba, the cha-cha and the Moonwalk. You get the idea.”

In 1992, Bloodworth Thomason was given the largest writing and producing contract in the history of CBS for some $50 million. Designing Women was a huge hit for CBS and her Evening Shade was the best new comedy that year. She says CBS chairman Howard Stringer and president Jeff Sagansky attended several Designing Women tapings and had given her carte blanche to tackle any subject, including sexual harassment, domestic violence and pornography.

But by 1995, Stringer and Sagansky were gone and a Les Moonves had taken over. Bloodworth Thomason was producing a new pilot titled Fully Clothed Non-Dancing Women and was concerned how Moonves—a fan of titty bars, or so she’d heard—might feel about the show.

Well, the answer is the show never aired, and Bloodworth Thomason was out at CBS and would not work again for seven years. She ALLEGES Moonves waged against her, turning down every one of her scripts and refusing to allow any CBS-contracted actor to work with her, noting that both Bette Midler and Huey Lewis requested to work with her and were turned down by Moonves. She also ALLEGES that Moonves would not hire any actress who didn’t want to “f–k” and how he once told a popular actress that she was too old to be on his network … and then forcibly kissed the woman.

And she points out that, under Moonves, all the shows featuring and starring brash, funny women were scrapped in favor of male-dominated series.

“I just feel angry. The truth is, Les Moonves may never be punished in the way that he deserves. He will almost certainly never go to jail. And he has already made hundreds of millions of dollars during his highly successful and truly immoral, bullying, misogynist reign.”

Still, again, it’s nice to see the pig fall. And, jail or not, career or not, his legacy will be that of a pig.

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Kristin Davis is thirsty for work and clearly still nursing a grudge that Kim Cattrall nixed the idea of yet another sequel to Sex and the City because, to commemorate the 70th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards, Davis posted a throwback photo of herself with her SATC co-stars … except Cattrall was not in the photo.

Davis chose a photo of herself, Sarah Jessica Parker and Cynthia Nixon at the 2004 ceremony; to be fair, Cattrall wasn’t cut out of the image, but while she was at the Emmys that year, and photographed with her co-stars, Davis skipped those pictures and went Cattrall-less.

Like I said, she’s thirsty for work …or another fifteen minutes.

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Faye Dunaway still can’t shake the Joan Crawford-ness of it all, decades after Mommie Dearest.

Last year, Faye “broke up” with her hairstylist because of a nasty spat over the bill and now she’s taken her drama to a new salon.

A source says the staff at the luxe Warren Tricomi salon have had it with Dunaway getting snippy with them. They say on one day, she changed her appointment ten different times, and then finally announced that she was ready and demanded service. When managers told her that she cannot order the staff around, Dunaway Reese Witherspoon’ed them:

“Do you know who I am? I am Faye Dunaway!”

In addition, Faye brings her infamous food scale to appointments and measures out salad and other food, letting the excess drop where it will, and then demanding the staff clean up after her.

And while you may think this isn’t true, the salon’s owner, Edward Tricomi, told the newspapers:

“Faye is fine. I’ve known her 40 years or better. Look, everybody has their moments in time, but Faye is fine. She is not a problem.”

Not exactly a denial, though. And, when reporters called Dunaway for her take on the story, she hung up on them.

She’s Faye Dunaway! Dammit!!

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Woody Allen’s a pig, we all know that, but let’s offer up one more example.

It’s about who fathered Rona Farrow with Mia; if you ask Woody, he’ll say he’s the daddy. Mia says there is a “possibility” that she made Ronan with her ex-husband Frank Sinatra but both Sinatra’s widow and his daughter Tina said there was no way Ronan is a Sinatra. And if you ask Ronan, he jokes:

“Listen, we're all ‘possibly’ Frank Sinatra's son.”

Now, for why Woody is a pig, other than that whole sleeping with his adopted daughter mess … he says he considers Ronan to be his kid, but he wouldn’t be surprised if a DNA proved otherwise, but that news would piss him off because … wait for it … oink … oink … he’s spent so much money on Ronan:

“In my opinion, he’s my child. I think he is, but I wouldn’t bet my life on it. I paid for child support for him for his whole childhood, and I don’t think that’s very fair if he’s not mine.”

It sounds like the only one of Mia’s kids he has no regrets paying for is Soon-Yi.

Just sayin’.

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