I Ain't One To Gossip, But.....

I still remember when they were casting Catwoman--eons before Halle Berry destroyed the character--and wack-a-doodle actress Sean Young went on The Joan Rivers Show in full Catgirl regalia, practically begging the producers to hire her.
They didn't. 
And it seemed like Young was on the Cracktress Express to Crazy Town. Except she kinda disappeared for a spell, showing up to drunkenly yell at awards winners at awards shows.
Now Young, one of Hollywood's First Ladies Of Cray-Cray, also found herself arrested on Oscar night for attempting to Lohan her way into the Governor's ball; to Lohan means to sit pathetically outside the venue until some schnook takes pity on you and asks you in, or the security guard turns his head and you leap the Velvet Rope.
The Governors Ball security guard knew Ticketless Sean was trying to worm her way in, so he suggested she try the Chick-fil-A Oscar bash instead. Sean Young was not amused. She's a star, dammit, even if only in her own head. So she continued to try and sneak in until the guard had enough and the two got into it. The guard says that Sean slapped him in the face--which is also called Going ZsaZsa--and he promptly gave her the Citizen's Arrest.
Young was taken to a police station in Hollywood where she was kept for four hours. Upon her release, around 3AM, Young told the gathering horde--and that's not a misprint, it was just one photog--that it's the Academy's lawyer's fault, that she was at the party with friends when for no reason at all, the Academy's lawyer told the security guard to arrest her ass.
Of course, if she'd been at the party, how to explain how she was outside the ropes all night. Oh, in Sean Young's head, outside the ropes IS the party.

Remember last week when it was announced that Gerard Butler had checked himself into rehab for his addiction issues, which may, or may not, have included the Lohan Method--i.e. prescription meds--cocaine and alcohol?
Well, when word came that he was in rehab, he'd actually already been there for weeks and was just about to be released.
Hey Gerard, you just completed 28 days of rehab for substance abuse issues! How you gonna celebrate? Disney World? 
Nope, Gerard Butler's first post-rehab stop was at the Vanity Fair Oscar party, a room full of more drunken users and coked up wannabes than a Lohan Family Christmas.
Seriously, Gerard. Get a grip. If you've just gotten out of a 28 day spa retreat and lost 100 pounds, would your first stop be the Del Taco Drive-thru? 
No, honey, no.

Now that I've mentioned Lohan a couple of times, it's time for The Lohan Update.
And it's all about cracktress Lindsay and her wacknut lies.
It seems Lohan gave an interview to The Mail about her ALLEGED role in the upcoming Direct-To-Motel-6-Pay-Per-View Elizabeth Taylor Story, that the real Liz Taylor gifted Lindsay Lohan with a ring shortly before she died.
Which, I'm guessing, is Lohan-speak for I broke into her house and stole a ring.
According to the article, Lohan says the late Elizabeth Taylor sent her a ring before she died: "I treasure it....It came with this beautiful note, hand-written by Elizabeth Taylor, which was very encouraging about my work--and that work is something I should concentrate on."
I think Liz was trying to say, Pawn this cheap bauble I found in my underwear drawer and pay for rehab, bitch.
And then Lohan comes clean and says it really was just a junk piece of costume jewelry sent to her by pig farmer, Elizabeef Taylor, from ScratchNutz, Tennessee.
I'm guessing.
Oh Lindsay. Expecting anyone to believe that Liz Taylor knew you, much less took a moment out of her day to send you a piece of glass.
Bitch please.

So, Chris Brown is still on everyone's radar because of that whole I Beat Rihanna thing a few years back, and people are pissed that he performed at the Grammys and won a Grammy. That might be the least of his worries.
It seems that Brown, who is still legally “on probation” from his plea of felony battery on Rihanna, is now being accused of stealing a woman’s phone in Miami after she snapped a few photos of him.
The Florida State’s Attorney's Office began an investigation into Brown after the woman filed a police report claiming he stole her cell phone. A spokesperson for the Miami Police Department released this statement: “An incident report was filed against Mr. Brown, and the Florida State Attorney’s Office will be issuing a warrant for his arrest this afternoon, I can’t tell you what time, but it will be today.”
The accuser, Chrital Spann, says that she snapped a few photos of Chris as he sat in a Bentley outside of a Miami club, and when Brown saw her, he ALLEGEDLY "snatched the phone" and shouted, “Bitch, you ain’t giving this to no website.”
Um, Chris, that would actually be, "Bitch, you aren't giving this to any website."
At any rate, Browns lawyer, Mark Geragos, has ALLEGEDLY been in talks with the Florida State’s Attorney’s Office because, as a source--and by source, I think we can all agree that it's Lohan--says, “Chris has nothing to hide and is hopeful that he won’t be charged with stealing the phone.”
And it could get ugly for him. If Brown is arrested the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office might seek to revoke his probation.
Maybe Chris Brown just needs to sit down, shut up, and keep his hands to himself.

And speaking of Brown, one of those folks most upset about Brown being on the Grammys is country singer Miranda Lambert, whose new album just so happens to feature a song about a girl seeking vengeance on a boy who beat her. Lambert has been using Chris Brown to hawk her album and rile up her fans in concerts all over the country.
But that's not the Lambert story of the week,
It’s pretty well known fact that Blake Shelton cheated on his first wife with fellow country singer Miranda Lambert, his current wife. I mean, she has as much as admitted to that in interviews. And, we've all heard the saying, Once a cheater.....
No, not her. Him,
It seems that Lambert's husband, Blake Shelton, hooked up with country singer Cady Groves, on Twitter some two years ago, and their cozy online banter is startin' to sizzle.
Cue fiddles.
A source--and by source I think we all know I mean Lohan--says, “Cady had a huge crush on Blake and followed him on Twitter for almost a year before they formally met. She was new to the country music scene and doing everything she could to get her boot in the door, so Cady sent Blake messages asking him to be in her new video."
And he did.
Soon Blake and Cady were ALLEGEDLY calling and texting each other every day, and our source, says,  “Oftentimes Cady would get a call in the middle of the day, then she’d suddenly pack her bags and fly to Oklahoma where Blake lives. Her trips were always very quick – usually 24 hours or less.” Well, this may be true, or may not be true, but even Lambert admits her husband is addicted to Tweeting, and is often a bit of a drunken Tweeter.

And IRONICALLY, the video that Shelton appeared in for this relatively unknown country newbie was a video for a song about cheating.
Just sayin'.