I Didn't Say It ...

Jonathan Groff, on what it’s like to shoot a gay sex scene:

“So, when you first get there and you take off the robes and you’re in your weird little dick sock and your anal cover, there’s usually some, like, laughter, and then we sort of talk about what is happening in the scene. And we sort of do a rehearsal with our shorts on or whatever. And then we do it. I find [sex scenes] really fun and enjoyable and funny and weird and hilarious and a great opportunity to share a lot about characters. And there’s no words, so it’s an interesting thing to act. But I’ve never done a sex scene with someone who smells bad or I didn’t like something about them. That would be terrible. That’s the benefit I’ve had. I’ve never done a sex scene with someone that has not been so respectful and great about smelling fine and making it as palatable as possible.”

I could barely get beyond “anal cover” and so I’ll leave it at that.

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Burt Reynolds, promoting his new memoir, on Charlie Sheen and his HIV status:

“He’s handled it badly, I think. His father is a very, very decent man and a dear friend of mine. I feel bad for him but Charlie, I don’t feel bad for him. He’s getting what he deserves. If you’re going to misbehave like that, they’re going to get you. He misbehaved badly. Very badly. But you know, when you’re that age, it’s tough. All those things are coming at you and it’s difficult.”

Funny. I remember back in the day when the rumor mills swirled that playboy Burt had AIDS and he said he was afraid the rumor would ruin his career.

You’d think he’d know better, but maybe his toupee is too tight or maybe he’s just an assh*le.

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Caitlyn Jenner, on looking like a “man in a dress”:

“One thing that has always been important for me, and it may seem very self-absorbed or whatever, is first of all your presentation of who you are. I think it’s much easier for a trans woman or a trans man who authentically kind of looks and plays the role. So what I call my presentation. I try to take that seriously. I think it puts people at ease. If you’re out there and, to be honest with you, if you look like a man in a dress, it makes people uncomfortable. So the first thing I can do is try to present myself well. I want to dress well. I want to look good. When I go out, as Kim says, you’ve got to rock it because the paparazzi will be there.”

I understand she’s new to this, and she’s still transitioning, but does she have to transition from one kind of an asshat to another kind of asshat.

Caitlyn looks like Caitlyn, and she should accept that, but she also needs to know that other people, trans or otherwise, look like themselves. Maybe she should transition into accepting all people as they are?

To be fair, she has, once again, apologized for putting her foot in her mouth, but I still wish she'd think before she speaks.

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Janine Turner, former Northern Exposure actress and current has-been wingnut, on how Darth Vader’s costume was black because Star Wars movies were based on the Bible:

“Regarding Darth Vader, please! The Bible talks darkness and light. This is about evil and good. Darkness and light. This doesn’t have anything to do with anything else, this goes back to biblical times. It’s been discussed in the Bible, Jesus talks about it. It’s about darkness and light, evil and good.”

I guess this is what happens to actresses who cannot get a job after being on a hit show?

Siddown Janine, sometimes a movie is just a movie, and not about the Bible at all.

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Barbara Walters, while interviewing Bradley Cooper for her 10 Most Fascinating People of 2015 special:

“I could just sit and stare at you but that would take too much time, but I, I find you very screwable.”

Grandma needs a nap.

I remember when Walters was considered a serious journalist, interviewing all kinds of heads of state, and now the eighty-six-year-old is reduced to tired come-ons to forty-year-old men, young enough to be her grandson.

Don't get me wrong, Cooper is screwable, but for Walters to say that ... ew.

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