Monday, July 16, 2012

PR10: Meet The Designtestants ...And Get My Two ¢ Worth Of Snark

All right then, the tenth season of the PR is upon us—beginning this Thursday night at 9 PM—and it’s time to meet the designtestants, get a taste of their personal style, and a look at their design sense, along with some insights from the designers themselves, and my reinterpretation of those insights.
Let’s roll:
Alicia Hardesty
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"I didn't really think about my potential as a designer until halfway through my design program, but I never thought I didn't have potential. I was just following what I wanted to do, and that's all I knew. I knew I was creative and not afraid to take risks."

She didn’t think about potential, but never thought she didn’t have potential. Yeah, she’ll be fun. She'll take risks, like gluing a model into a dress

Strengths as a designer?
"I'm very adaptive and a problem solver. I can create with all kinds of materials, for various target markets and from various sources of inspiration."

In other words, she can make shit from shinola, and then sell it on TV to Heidi and the gang.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Keeping it simple. I always remind myself not to force too many ideas into one piece."

I’m getting beads and sequins and epaulets and zippers and leather and lace, and all in the first outfit. But then I see a picture of her work and I’m gonna toss in Waterworld, too.

Andrea Katz:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"Age 10. "

Thank you. Please keep your answers brief and dull....like your ensemble.

Strengths as a designer?

"I don't follow trends."

Snob. But, um, one look at your outfit and I knew you knew nothing about trends.

Weaknesses as a designer?

"I don't follow trends."

Snob. Methinks Ms. Katz thinks far too highly of herself, and from the looks of her Rabbi Chic outfit, I’m sure she takes herself too seriously.

Beatrice Guapo:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"When I was young I would have my mom edit and create dresses and outfit."

Um, Beatrice? Darling? That’s when you realized your Mom had potential. We're talking about you, dear.

Strengths as a designer?
"My strength is knitwear. I can make various looks from lounge, dressy, day, to evening in knits. I am strong in sketching, pattern-making, and concept."

Yeah, we’ve had knitwear designers and they unravel—see what I did there?—at the first challenge. And I don't think I've ever seen a crocheted evening gown, so this could get good...and ugly.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"I hardly ever sew wovens. I don't sew by hand, and I rarely use zippers."

Can’t sew. 
Can’t zip.  
And that outfit looks like it slipped over the head of a size zero model. I predict all kinds of clothes that don’t fit.

Buffi Jashanmal:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"I've always been creative and artistic. In my teens I was interested in acting and theatrical makeup and hair. Late teens I really got into fashion and styling and have always liked to dress uniquely and a bit left of center, thanks to my mum. My cousin saw my sketches when I finished my first degree in English and Drama and suggested I move to NYC to study fashion. I didn't know how to sew, but loved designing! I was hooked when I first used the scary machines at Parsons - they are fast!"

Her personal style is an homage to Sgt. Michael “Pepper” Jackson’s Lonely Hearts Club Band In Xanadu. And that scares the Baby Designer Jeebus outta me.

Strengths as a designer?
"Creative and unique. I like to try new ideas and techniques. My sewing and pattern-making are both strong."

She can’t sew, and she can’t pattern.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"I am too much of a passionate artist/designer, and need to focus my designs with a customer in mind. I think this is where I have failed in the past. I don't have a strong enough vision of who I am designing for."

Too passionate is a weakness? How about too much gold sash at the waist?

Christopher Palu:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"Always liked designing but it became clear in high school that I loved it and needed to go to F.I.T."

He came out at 14. And, sidenote, he obviously didn’t get the Memo from Homo HQ that scarves and skinny jeans were OVER.
Because they are.

Strengths as a designer?
"I'm very fast."

Um, we’re talking design, right? Because, i know this is on Lifetime and all, but I don't wanna see this guy doing the nasty with Jennifer Love Hewitt on The Client List.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"That I over-think everything."

And by over-thinking, I think he means he slips into designing for whores and Lindsay Lohan.
And Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Dmitry Sholokhov:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"I started sketching very early, around age 7, and I think around age 10 I already knew that I would be a designer."

By age 12, judging from his own personal style, he was in the KGB and marching in Red Square. And waterboarding Kmart shoppers

Strengths as a designer?
"I have great construction, draping and technical skills."

None of which is evident in that "design." 
It looks like he created it for a Porn-Bot. I mean, is that an outfit a real person would wear? A real person who doesn't work flat on her back?

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Sometimes I don't have enough patience."

He’s gonna be the Class Bitch. And anyone named Dmitry, who is the Class Bitch, will be worth watching. Unless you want to be sent to Siberia.
Just sayin'.

Elena Slivnyak
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"I've known I wanted to be a fashion designer ever since I was little."

And she’s still wearing the same shoes as evidence of that. Or, she just left the national touring company of Up With People. Either way....seriously?

Strengths as a designer?
"Developing high-quality structured garments. An eye for luxury, patterns and construction."

This is Elena-speak for My clothes will look cheap.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Time management."

She doesn’t own a watch. But, judging from that outfit, she does have the ability to time travel and see what folks are wearing in the Moon next century.

Fabio Costa
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"Before I went to school, when I started customizing my own clothing because I couldn't find exactly what I wanted to wear."

By customizing, he means, Dumpster Diving and then tying Kitchen Rags into knots around his waist.

Strengths as a designer?
"Unique sense of style. Progressive construction."

His unique sense of style is tying Kitchen Rags into knots around his waist.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Tendency to overlook finishing touches."

Like untying Kitchen Rags knots from around his waist and then putting them on a model and telling them to 'work' it.
I don't see the tents in Fabio's future. Unless he takes a tent and ties it in a knot around his waist.

Gunnar Deatherage
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"In high school. It just came naturally."

The shorts. The scarf. The hair.
It's quite clear Gunnar came out in high school, right after 101 Dalmatians opened and he took to wearing Cruella De Vil hair.

Strengths as a designer?
"Outerwear, autumn/winter."

Huh?

Weaknesses as a designer?
"The Grecian look. I'm not big on chiffon."

Oh, are you picking on Grecian Draping God, and my PR Crush, Rami, now? That won’t bode well with me Gunnar. 
Sidenote: I do love the name Gunnar Deatherage. Sounds very Cruella De Vil……oh.

Kooan Kosuke
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"16 years old."

When he first wore pink shorts, the yellow sneakers, Gabe Kaplan's fro from , Welcome Back, Kotter and started moonwalking.

Strengths as a designer?
"Designing, pattern making, draping, tailoring, etc."

As evidenced by that first cartoon sketch, er, design up there, he is more costume, than design, and Nina will eat him for lunch. With a side salad and a nice French Chardonnay.

Weaknesses as a designer?
":::crickets::::::"

Seriously. He might design with crickets. Of for crickets. Or while eating crickets.

Lantie Foster:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"About the age of 16."

I’m getting a Granny Pant Gretchen vibe here and that irks me. One season of granola was enough. E-nuff!

Strengths as a designer?
"Using unexpected textures, items and trims together."

She takes scraps and pieces and parts and then makes clothes, giving the leftover Kitchen Rags to Fabio.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"That I don't have 10 personal sewers!"

She.Can’t.Sew. 
But she'll kvetch and moan about it until someone takes the pinking shears to her head.
Must-See-TV.

Melissa Fleis:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"Since I was a little girl."

When she wanted to be Barbie when she grew up. Only, New York Barbie, dressed entirely in black.
Asymmetrical black, at that.

Strengths as a designer?
"A forward, distinct look with couture garment construction and experimental design techniques. Hardworking and organized."

And quite fond of herself. 
She will be able to do everything….badly.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Over-thinking it."

Judging from that first design, she doesn’t think enough.
Leggings? Leg?Ings?

Nathan Paul:
First garment you ever made?
"I made my first garment when I was 5. It was a skirt for my mother."

Gay. And, in the interests of full discourse, abso-freaking-lutely adorkable. I want him to be my new bestie.

Strengths as a designer?
"Knowledge of how to work with material and the specific properties."

Properties? Is this Million Dollar Listings? 

Weaknesses as a designer?
"Time management."

And I'll let my Nate slide on that one, because, I’m guessing, it takes a lot of time to create that fabulous evening dress, all the while coordinating his shoes, and his sweaters and his glasses.

Raul Osorio:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"Five years ago when I decided to start making my own clothes."

And if what he’s wearing is any indication, he also missed the missive about Skinny Jeans and Pot Bellies. 
And hats.

Strengths as a designer?
"Very good construction, excellent pattern-maker, and an executive taste."

Executive taste? WTF is that? Dressing a grown man like Little Lord Fauntleroy? Honey…………No. No.

Weaknesses as a designer?
":::crickets::::"

Oh, I think there are all kinds of weaknesses with Raul. Starting with Skinny Jeans and Hats, and a Curly Q on your forehead.

Sonia Williams:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"When my mom taught me how to sew at 12."

And she looks fabulous!
I have a nonsexual crush on her, too, and picture her, and Nathan and me in a threesome….well, except she'd be in the other room making Cosmos.

Strengths as a designer?
"My attention to detail."

Her outfit does look pretty good. Chic. Urban. Sexy.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"My lack of time management."

Get.A.Watch! Seriously. I'm no designer, but I know after all these seasons that you'll have about ten minutes to make a twenty piece collection out of twigs, so get busy!!

Ven Budhu:
When did you realize you had designer potential?
"There was always an interest in women's dresses. My sister always reminds me of stories when I was about 5 or 6 years old. She said I used to have her or my mom buy me large sheets of white oak tag craft paper at the local store. I would literally sit on the floor, look at the VHS cover of the classic animated movie "Beauty and the Beast" and draw Belle's gown in full-scale, with some embellishments of course. I think I officially knew I wanted to design when I was in elementary school. A passion for evening dresses was evident at a very young age."

Always an interest in dresses. Gay. Draws Belle and recreates her gowns. Gay. Passion for evening dresses. Gay.

Strengths as a designer?
"I think my strength as a designer is that I have the "taste and eye" for design which is something that you cannot learn or acquire. I think these are elements that you are born with. This is what I was born to do and what was meant for me will happen. As Michael Kors would say, you either have it or you don't."

Honey, I know Michael Kors, and you, sir, are no Michael Kors. But that gown is fabulous, and I bet it looked good on you when you wore it and danced around the workroom with a life-sized Tea Pot.

Weaknesses as a designer?
"I don't think I have weaknesses as a designer. I know how to handle situations and I am always learning something new."

No weaknesses. Going home early.

What do you think?

7 comments:

  1. Time management - people! have you watched Project Runway?? Tim is going to be concerned. A lot!
    Loves the commentary :-) We can hardly wait!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous10:12 AM

    I remember Gunnar Deatherage from last season. He was one of the designers who were eliminated in the first episode to get down to the sixteen who would begin the competition.

    Kooan stole Coco Perez, aka Perez Hilton's outfit. Remember this?

    Sonia and Nathan are the early faves. I can see Gunnar going home first episode again this year.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous5:38 PM

    There is a special "get to know the designers" pre-show at 8pm.

    Also, have you seen the new Madonna video for "Turn Up The Radio?" good song and video BUT is she wearing those god awful pant/short that Gretchen won PR with?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am so burnt out over this show, and I can't do another season. But when I first saw this I thought it was a spread for choices of a pet from the local Spca

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous2:35 PM

    Do you actually like anyone? Besides yourself?

    PS FYI - not everyone in Soviet Union was in KGB, marching on Red Square etc...What a stupid cliche to use for someone who's obviously trying very hard to appear different

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks for commenting, Anonymous, if that is your real name, but don't let me stop you from running out and buying a little something I like to call a sense of humor.
    Yure sure as f**k need one.

    ReplyDelete

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