.........for Love Takes Over:
We watched as marriage equality was defeated in California and some of us wept while others cheered. We listened as marriage equality was voted down in Maine and some of us wept while others cheered. We got the news that marriage equality was the law of the land in Iowa and some of us cheered while others wept.
Such a visceral reaction on both sides.
It’s only love. It’s only two people wanting to make a commitment to be together and live together, and be accepted as equal by our state, our country, our friends and family. So, what exactly is wrong with same-sex marriage? I’ve heard all the arguments:
- God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. But if you understand that being gay is not a choice—and it isn’t, because who would choose to live a life where they can be fired, evicted, beaten or murdered just for being themselves—well, then God did make Adam and Steve. For all the differences in each religious belief, it can all be boiled down to one point: God is love. God isn’t hate and discrimination. God is love.
- Marriage has traditionally been one man-one woman for over five thousand years and it’s never changed. Not true. Used to be marriages were performed to unite two families into one more powerful family. Used to be that the woman became the property of the man after marriage and she had no voice in familial maters. Used to be that divorce was not an option. Used to be marriage was to create a family, and keep the family line going. Used to be that it was wrong to marry outside your faith, or your socio-economic class. Now, marriage is based on love; the couple are equal in the marriage; you have the choice to marry the person you love; you have the choice to have a family or not.
- Marriage is a religious institution. Well, no it isn’t. While marriages are often performed in churches, a marriage isn’t legal until the state says it’s legal, which makes marriage a civil institution and a civil right, guaranteed to all under the Constitution of this country.
- Same-sex marriage will destroy the sanctity of marriage. This is simply not true. You just have to look at Massachusetts to see that. Marriage equality has been on the books for several years now, and so-called rational marriage hasn’t been destroyed. Marriages are destroyed by the people in the marriage who choose to opt out of the commitment they entered. Mark Sanford. John Ensign. Britney Spears. John Edwards. Jennifer Lopez. Newt Gingrich. All straight. All have destroyed, or made a mockery of, marriage.
The LGBT community doesn’t want to step on your marriage because we can’t. We don’t want to destroy your marriage because we can’t. We simply want the same rights and privileges other people enjoy. Years ago, my partner was hospitalized. Luckily, we lived in Miami at the time, so I was allowed to spend the night in the room before and after his surgery; I was allowed to be in the room when the doctor consulted him; I was treated as his family.
That’s all we want; to be treated as a family; to be accepted as a family.
It’s only love.
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