Thursday, May 01, 2014

Random Musings

A little Bob'n'Carlos for your amusement.

One night this week, while I was readying to leave work, I called home to ask Carlos a question. He didn't pick up  maybe he wasn't home yet, maybe he outside with the dog, or checking his roses   so I left a message that went something like this:
Just had a quick question for you but it's no big deal. It can wait until I get home in a bit. No need to call me back. DON'T.CALL.ME.BACK.
A few minutes later I was told I had a phone call; the receptionist — who is new and doesn't know Carlos — said:
There's a man on the phone who wants to know where you put the olive oil.
Seriously. It wasn't in the pantry so Carlos had no idea where the olive oil could be, and he called with that question.

Needless to say we all   my co-workers and I ... not Carlos — had a long hard laugh over that one. Bless his heart.
In the wake of the so-called Religious Freedom Restoration Act, some Mississippi businesses began displaying the If you’re buying, we’re selling…We don’t discriminate sticker to welcome both the LGBTs and the LGBT-friendlies and people who just plain hate any kind of discrimination.

But don’t count the ironically named American Family Association among that group because they say, “It’s not really a buying campaign, but it's a bully campaign." 

Yes, they want you to believe that any business that puts up a We Don’t Discriminate decal in their windows is anti-Christian and is bullying Christians.

Funny though that ….
Herald Embroidery in Oak Grove, Kentucky produces customized apparel, ad banners, and promotional materials and they also displayed a decal in their window which blatantly states that Christians, people with beards and folks who carry guns are welcome, but people who curse and The Gays need to stay away. And that ironically named American Family Association doesn't call that discrimination because, well, God.

Oddly enough, though, less than 24 hours after the story broke and it was all over the news and the webz, owner MichaelLombard removed all of the stickers and issued non-retraction retraction:

“Notice: We recently posted five 3″ stickers on the front entrance to our shop. Two of these stickers are negative and prohibitive in their message. After some public confusion as to the meaning of one which depicted a rainbow flag, we’ve replaced them with a clarification. 

While we will serve all customers who treat our place of business with respect, we reserve the right to refuse to produce promotional products that promote ideas that are not in keeping with our consciences. This includes, but is not limited to content promoting homosexuality, freemasonry, the use of foul language, and imagery which promotes immodesty."

So, he’s still a homophobe discriminating against The Gays but he simply took his Hate Stickers off the door.
V. Stiviano. Go away, please. First, you record your lover-who-is-old-enough-to-be-your-grandpa-but-he-has-a-big-wallet-so-why-not and his racist rant and then it magically gets released.

At which time you take to shielding your face in a ridiculous visor while walking, or even, for the love of the goddess, roller-skating in front of your house.

You are desperately seeking attention. Are you sure your last name isn't Kardashian? I mean you’re a Kardastrophe-style fame-whore … emphasis on whore.
Just because … that’s Ben Hardy, from Britain’s long-running soap EastEnders posing in Details ... that’s all.
UPDATE: Last month I posted about the Fauquier High School’s library and one mother’s attempt to have the book “Two Boys Kissing” removed from the shelves — HERE.

Well, it ain’t happening because this week a review committee voted unanimously to keep the book on the shelves after a meeting with Jessica Wilson, the parent who requested the book’s removal, and an emotional public hearing.

One voice of reason was that of Joshua Moore, a recent graduate from Fauquier’s public schools who is openly gay, and says books like “Two Boys Kissing” helped him when he was struggling with coming out:
“I remember how it felt for me to come to terms with myself. I remember one day I went to the library and I started reading. ‘The Perks of Being a Wallflower’ and ‘Hero.’ They were very poignant to me. My librarians helped me to broaden my horizons. I didn’t have to sit around and think that I was so alone in this school.”
Here’s the deal: if books like that one, and others, helps one student not feel so all alone, not feel so different, not feel like an outcast, then the shelves of every public school library should be littered with them.
Onto RuPaul's Drag Race and the episode I will now and forever refer to as WTF Was Ru Smokin’?

For the Mini Challenge the last five queens created puppets of one of their competitors for a little show, and BenDeLaCreme was the clear winner with his spot-on puppetry of Bianca Del Rio.

The Main Challenge was the Glitter Ball, where the ladies had to create three looks — a Banjee Girl Look, some Platinum Executive Realness and Dripping in Jewels Eleganza — and here’s how that went down:

Adore Delano — and, again, I do not adore Delano — finally won a challenge. Her BenDeLaCreme puppet was very good, and she totally nailed the voice. As for her runway looks, the judges said the Banjee Girl was the best of the night, but how could they think that a button-down shirt and slacks was Executive realness? But her Dripping with Jewels drag was superb.

Bianca Del Rio stumbled a bit in the puppetry section by just relying on F-bombs and Adore catchphrases. In the main challenge her Banjee Girl was a little too fabulous, though her Executive Realness was purrrrrr-fection, and her Sapphire gown was stunning, though guest judge Bob Mackie — who knows his way around a gown — wasn’t loving it. Still, even a stumbling Bianca is better than most of the others.

Courtney Act. Beautiful girl. That’s about it. There’s no charm there; there’s no real passion; there’s no style; no eleganza; no wit; no sparkle, Neely, sparkle. She’s a pretty girl. Yawn.

And so the Bottom Two are BenDeLaCreme — Noooooooooooooooooooo­ — and Darienne Lake:
Darienne’s puppetry was nothing at all, and then she trotted out on the runway in three ridiculous outfits, none of which met the challenge. Banjee Girl was more Night At The Disco girl, while her Executive Realness was, as Michelle Visage put it, Jiffy Lube Executive. Her Dripping in Jewels gown could have been a nod to Princess Leia, but some unfortunate fabric choices made it look more like Jabba the Hutt after he ate princess Leia.
BenDeLaCreme! WTF was Ru Smokin’? He clearly won the Puppetry biz, and, okay, his Banjee Girl was more of a 1940s version, but his other two looks were clearly better than Darienne, and not as one-note as Courtney.

The Lip Sync:
BenDeLa isn’t the best at lip-syncing, but his was clearly, CLEARLY, better than Darienne, and even she knew it, judging from her reaction to the news that she was safe.

Lotsa folks been calling this season rigged, what with Adore and Darienne still there, and I never believed it until this week. On any given day, I’d take a BenDeLaCreme show over Darienne Realness or Adore Dorkiness or Courtney Beauty Treatments.

What did YOU think?
Lordy I loathe Madonna. It’s always a media stint with that bitch, what with the stupid-ass grill, the Spy v Spy Grammy outfit, the calling her son a n****r, the Instagrams of her hairy pits, her “performance” with Miley; clearly she’ll do anything for attention, as most aging out-of-touch divas will do, but then she does this:

While some call her a gay icon — I don’t and for reasons other than this — she put her foot in her mouth again, thinking she’s all funny and hip and smart and so so above it all, in a Buzzfeed 10 Random Things feature where Madge did a little word association.

How au currant. Yawn. For ‘Guacamole’ she wrote down ‘Gross germs’ which makes no sense but then Madge probably thought Guacamole was an STD she caught in the 80s.
But, for ‘Kale’ Madge wrote down ‘Gay’ because gay is a put-down; gay is bad; when you don’t like something it’s gay.

She’s an idiot because, for me, when I think ‘kale’ now, I'll think ‘Madonna’ and I will forever think of ‘Guacamole’ as an STD.
Just Because Redux ... Zachary Quinto. Hot, gay, smart. And now buff, as she showed in an Instagram picture of himself as he gets in shape for his next film, an action picture called Agent 47 ... more like Agent Hot.
Over Memorial Day weekend in 2013, Lynn Zlotkowski was married, and like most brides she wanted to share the good news with friends and old classmates. But when she sent the news of her marriage to the Sacred Heart Academy, her submission was rejected.

She married another woman, dontcha know, and ain’t no Lesbian Wedding Pictures going into a Sacred Heart newsletter as Sister Edith Wyss told her in a nicely worded, We Don’t Picture Gays letter.

Too bad the Catholic Church is so far behind the times that the wedding picture of a legally married former student of Sacred Heart is deemed unprintable in an alumnae newsletter.
Another update on an ISBL post — HERE.

A South Carolina senate subcommittee has recommended a budget that omits GOP-controlled, House-passed cuts to two public colleges that were using gay-themed books.

The chair of the subcommittee, Senator John Courson — a Republican for goddess’ sake — said he believes the choice of which books to use “should be up to the presidents of the institution and the board of trustees which the General Assembly elects.”

Good on him for standing up to the bigots in his party and for doing the sane, sensible thing.

7 comments: said...

I am in complete Ru-greement with you. I’ve always thought that Drag Race was rigged and that the contestants, once they got to the top six or so, were in on it. It seems that in the past promises may have been made to the contestants that resulted in their having contracts of some kind with LOGO, Absolute or other sponsors.

I almost kinda get why Adore Delano is still around. Adore, while certainly not polished in the field of drag, is without a doubt entertaining. Darienne Lake, on the other hand, is not the least bit entertaining … she’s not funny, she’s not clever, she’s not even nice. I think she’s mean and boring.

I had predicted BenDeLa to be top three with Bianca and Courtney so I’m really disappointed with RuPaul’s decision this week.

the dogs' mother said...

Up here in the PNW-EastSide we had to look up Banjee Girl (apparently Google does not think it is a real word). Anyway we like our QueenTestants to be funny, sharp, entertaining and kind. We are not getting that vibe from Darienne.
omgoodness! The twitters of the week! Very enjoyable :-)

mistress maddie said...

Sorry, but because I'm still inhaling my smelling salts, I can't discuss the bullshit that went down on DragRace, especially since I just saw Ben DeLaCreme on Friday night!!!!!

So nice to read that the Two Boys book won it's case. And if it only helps two kids, it's worth it's wait in gold.

Don't even get me started on Ben Hardy!!!! I love Eastenders.

Donald Sterling, what a tarnished mess he is. I just heard today, he also beat his son once with reporters present for an interview. What a class act he is.

And one last question Bob?

Where's the olive oil?

Bob Slatten said...

In the cupboard next to the stove ... sheesh!

SEAN (The Jeep Guy) said...

I'm sorry but I have no idea how good or bad Darienne's lip syncing was because I just couldn't look at her. That outfit, and I use the term loosely even though the outfit was anything but, what showing me things i just didn't want to see.

Blobby said...

I care about RuPaul's shows like I care about sewing shows. Not a bit. Sorry. I just don't.

As for Madonna - nothing is sadder than an aging white woman trying to think she's a 22 yo black man w her grill and her crap jewelry.

I won't even mention that hair and that hideous top she's wearing. She looks like a bad version of Lisa Lupner.

Mitchell is Moving said...

So much of this just leaves me speechless...

But, where DID you put the olive oil?

(I once received a phone call at my office from Jerry, who was filling out a form in his office, "Mitchell, how old am I?"