I ♥ Jodie

I'm an awards show whore. I love the spectacle and the clothes and the jokes and the gaffes, but I especially love those unexpected moments and last night, at the Golden Globes, we had one of those.

Jodie Foster [officially] came out.

Sure, we'll all known that Jodie was gay for years because, well, she never said she wasn't....and never said she was, for that matter. But, you know, she had those two children and never married a man, and never talked about her private life so she was gay.

Then, we read stories that Jodie and her longtime partner, and, as she called her last night "co-parent", Cydney Bernard, had split up, but still, no talking from Jodie about their relationship. But last night that all changed with a wonderful speech about being who you are, and being a celebrity and maintaining that sense of privacy.

I'm going to agree with Jodie.

And I’m going to disagree with Jodie.

First off, yes, she is entitled to privacy; we all are. We don't have to tell the world who we are and who we love; I mean, you don't hear straight people declaring their heterosexuality on a Very Special Oprah. One thing that's annoyed me is that when a celebrity announces that they are gay, then gay becomes the first word to describe them. I saw a blog post a week or so ago about a cooking show and how "Gay Olympic Skater Johnny Weir" was to be on it.

Did I miss any article about "Straight Football Player Tom Brady" doing something newsworthy?

So, I get that Jodie wanted privacy. I get that, after starting in show business at the age of three, she longed for a space and a place where she wasn't faced with fame; a place where she could love the person she loved and they could raise their children together and she wouldn't be "Gay Oscar Winner Jodie Foster."

I agree. Privacy, especially for a celebrity, is a rare thing, even though a lot of famous folk share with us their every detail. We see them on magazine covers talking about their divorces and sharing photos of their weddings and the births of their children, but when someone like Foster simply asks for privacy, we feel like she's asking for the moon.

We don't deserve the moon. We don't have the right to know what goes on, and with whom, in the Foster household. It's called a private life for a reason. That said, here’s where I disagree with Jodie.

I wonder, since she's in show business, as she said, for forty-seven years, that if she had come out, publicly, and openly, the moment she felt comfortable enough to do it, how many young gay women, and men, she might have inspired to do the same. How many LGBTQ youth might have realized that they were like Jodie, in being gay and in wanting to make movies?

I'm all for privacy, but all gay men and women come out all the time, every day, to everyone, and it's no different for Jodie Foster. Carlos and I come out to clerks at grocery stores because we shop together and answer questions together. Buying a refrigerator, we tell the delivery people where "our” house is and how to get there. Answering questions we often refer back to our partner. Coming out is a necessity; coming out needs to be done, because, when we don’t come out, whether you're a lonely high school kid in California decades ago, or an Oscar winning actress at awards show, every time one of us comes out, it makes it harder for people to put us down.

Strength in numbers; strength in pride.

I was one of those people tearing up last night when Jodie talked about opening up to friends and family, co-workers, and people she'd actually "met" and yet, Jodie needs to know that, through her career, through her films, she's met all of us, and by coming out, even while maintaining her right to privacy, she has done a great thing for the LGBT community.

And, I think, for herself.

Still, I hope she doesn't end up being called "Gay Oscar Winner Jodie Foster" because then I’ll be forced into using "Straight Oscar Winner Meryl Streep" and that's a lot of extra keystrokes.

So, let's end this by, officially, welcoming Jodie out, and offering her the Homo HQ Coming Out Toaster Oven, and a copy of the Gay Agenda, with its one-word philosophy, "Equality" and an addendum I'll call the Jodie Foster Appendix that also contains one word, "Privacy."

In case you missed it last night, this is Jodie, in all her glory......