Monday, November 12, 2012

Pastor Charged With Sexually Assaulting Men During Ex-Gay Therapy Sessions

Even though it's been a while, I can still remember what it's like to be in the closet. i remember the shame, the loneliness, the feeling that you are so different that you'll never fit in. And I remember casting the light on others who might be gay, or seem somehow "gay," to keep people from seeing my own queerness. I made the jokes about that 'fag' just to stay, in my mind at least, safe from detection. I laughed and I pointed fingers. I name-called and I stayed far away from anyone who might be openly gay, lest people get any suspicions about me.

It's not a nice place to be, and all sorts of awful things can happen; not just to your own psyche, you know, from denigrating the very person you are. How sick is it to ridicule someone for being who they are, when you are the same thing? The closet is far from  being a safe haven. It's dark, for a reason, so no one can see you, and so you can't see yourself.

Still, it never ceases to amaze me that the most vociferous anti-LGBT voices--the ones who say being gay is akin to bestiality, incest, pedophilia, and so much more--are the ones with something to hide.

Like Ryan Jay Muehlhauser, the 55-year-old pastor of Lakeside Christian Church in Cambridge, Minnesota. Late last week Muehlhauser was arrested and later charged with eight felony counts of criminal sexual conduct for allegedly assaulting two men while counseling them about their sexual orientation.

The cynic in me says it sounds like Muehlhauser was using reparative therapy counseling as a kind of dating service. Only, rather than simply meet men and maybe start up a relationship, his own shame and self-loathing caused him to sexually assault other self-loathing, closeted homosexuals.

Victim #1--as he is being called----told police about the assaults last week, saying he'd met Muehlhauser two years ago at an event held by Outpost Ministries, a group that works with men and women trying to change their sexual orientation.

Victim #1 said that Muehlhauser, in "counseling" sessions, often "blessed" him by cupping his genitals outside of his clothing several times. He also claims the good pastor asked him to arouse himself in front of Muehlhauser, and called it "spiritual strength." he also claims Muehlhauser would have him strip naked for more "spiritual guidance" and have him masturbate while Muehlhauser prayed over him.

Victim #2 has also reported similar activities and said that Muehlhauser told him if people found out about any of their "sessions" they would "lose everything."

At this time, "Pastor" Muehlhauser is not in custody and is not commenting on the allegations.

Does no one see how being closeted, and being made to feel less than, makes some of these men, and women, become sexual predators, even in the name of attempting to "cure" The Gay?

When are people going to wake up and realize that gay cannot be prayed away, or cured through counseling? It just is; and we all need to accept it, gay and straight, and move on from this kind of thinking.

If Muehlhauser had only been able to accept himself, and be himself, maybe he would have devoted so much of his life to trying to cure people of being gay, just so he could cop a feel or two.



Anonymous said...

So that's how they cure the gay? What an asshat. He deserves to be locked up until the end of his days.

Wonder Man said...


Mitchell is Moving said...


Ron said...

Never did that stuff when I was in the closet Bob. Only reason I stayed in the closet for the first 21 years of my life was for my physical saftety and so I wouldn't get kicked out of the Army. After I was out, I came OUT, hell be damned. Lots of friends and family didn't like it, lost some, gained some. Never looked back. However, never in my life did I particpate in a gay joke or let one go by in my presence which of course brought out the usual response "What's with you? You gay?" I was silent to that question until May 1963. Then I said "Yes, you have a problem with that?" They always backed down. Which is why I say if all gays came out that would end discrimination immediately. It is those gays who are afraid to come out that permit the yoke of oppression to continue even to this day.

Biki said...

There are times I hate religion. Without religion to tell the population that being gay was bad, there wouldnt be self loathing lgbt folks. There wouldnt be hate crimes against us. We would have all of our civil rights. And maybe, just maybe trans women wouldn't be afraid to use the bathroom in public.