Bobservations

I have always called Carlos the Absentminded Professor because his memory is like a sieve. But the other morning, while watching the news, that Subaru ad came on with the dogs driving the car, and he asked why they don’t use cats, and I replied:

“Cats don’t drive. Cats are driven.”

We chuckled, and then I told him the story of my friend Laura who, when I recommended years ago that she see the movie The Red Violin she asked if it had subtitles, and then said:

“I don’t read.”

We chuckled some more, and then Carlos starts talking about The Red Violin and literally spells out the entire plot, and every minute detail of the story. This from a man who cannot remember where he left his phone, every single time he sets it, but The Red Violin which he hasn’t seen in over twenty years? 

He’s got it.

Tuxedo asks all the right questions but the noise on the right, who are clearly trying to distract from their Big Lie and Voter Suppression Agenda, are too loud.

Well, Jeopardy! is back to guest hosts after the resignation of Mike Richards who said some pretty awful things about women in a podcast several years ago, and subsequently resigned. Now actor Mayim Bialik will return as the first in another round of guest hosts until a permanent host is picked … by Mike Richards.

Take note: whatever you post on social media can and will be used against you one day, so, you know, watch your mouth.

It speaks volumes about the ignorance of some people when the Food and Drug Administration [FDA] has to use Twitter to remind people—who don’t want to take the vaccine—to not to take the “horse paste” drug Ivermectin to fight COVID-19:

“You are not a horse. You are not a cow. Seriously, y’all. Stop it.”

Ivermectin is the new bleach … which was the new shine a light up your ass …which was the new hydroxychloroquine.

The other day at work two co-workers were discussing their political ideology and one, who makes no bones about being a Republican,  said something about having no problem with gay people because he … wait for it … has a friend who is gay and so he clearly has no problem. Now, try as I might to keep quiet, big surprise, I could not. So, I channeled my inner Julia Sugarbaker—for the young ones in the crowd, Google her—and I said to Mr. Gay-friendly.

“So, you’re cool with The Gays because you have a gay friend? I find that odd because never once in the entire time you have worked here have you acknowledged my husband or even said his name. And, whenever I have mentioned him, and I talk about him a lot because we have a twenty-one-year life together, even in the early days of your employment, did you ask who Carlos was, what he did, how we met, while the first time you mentioned your girlfriend I asked about her. Perhaps you ought to rethink what being ‘cool with The Gays’ really means. It means speaking to us, acknowledging us, and treating us equally. Acting like we exist outside of being your friend. But thanks for telling us all that you have ‘no problem’ with me. I’ll sleep better tonight”

Sometimes I just can’t.

Spencer Elden, the grown-ass man whose unusual baby portrait was used the cover of Nirvana’s “Nevermind,” filed a lawsuit alleging that the nude image constituted child pornography.

That’s the cover there on the left, and that’s grown-ass Spencer on the right, recreating the cover shoot on the 10th, 17th, 20th and 25th anniversary of the album’s release. And don’t you just love his “Nevermind” chest tattoo?

Elden wants $150,000 from surviving band members Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic; Courtney Love, the executor of Kurt Cobain’s estate; Guy Oseary and Heather Parry, managers of Cobain’s estate; photographer Kirk Weddle; art director Robert Fisher; and a number of existing or defunct record companies that released or distributed the album in the last three decades.

Elden seems to have forgotten that his parents signed a release for the photo, and were paid for the photo, so if he wants to sue for coins, start with mom and dad.

Down here in South Carolina, where It’s Not The Heat, It’s The Stupidity, some parents in Greenville County attended a school board meeting to discuss COVID. Some want masks; some don’t. Even though right now 910 students are quarantining, 245 are isolating, and 407 are waiting for test results.

But the icing on the cake was a woman who stood up before the board and claimed that she had … dear goddess you cannot make this shiz up … uncovered a plot by the CDC to shut down schools and turn them into Nazi-style concentration camps, where children will be taken away from their parents, and couples separated from each other.

Again, the biggest virus in this country is Ignorance and the only vaccine is education and active brain cells.

Erik Prince, the American defense contractor who, let’s be queer, makes his coins off of war, is offering people seats on a chartered plane out of Kabul.

For $6,500 per person. He can literally fuck himself into oblivion.

Following his wingnut tour of the Midwest with fellow Congressional lunatic, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Matt Gaetz got married  on Catalina Island off the coast of California. And for a guy who craves the spotlight, the event was decidedly understated. The bride's brother, Palmer, and his partner, Nicole, and Nestor Galban, Gaetz’s adopted “son,” represented the family.

Note to Gaetz: a wife cannot testify against their husband about anything that happens after the marriage, but she can be compelled to testify about your sex trafficking life before saying ‘I do.’

Shomari Francis. I know almost nothing about him, other than he likes wearing barely there briefs and is smolderingly hot. And I’m not mad at that.