Monday, July 13, 2015

Today In Stoopid: Kentuckians Want A Dead Guy Over Mitch McConnell As Senator

Oh Kentucky. I’m’a have to ask you to sit down. I mean, you made this problem, and you could have fixed it, but you stayed home, or you just put your check next to the box that said ‘Incumbent’ because, what, it was too hard to actually think before you voted.

Let me backtrack: Kentucky Senator, and Senate Majority Leader, Mitch McConnell is so unpopular in Kentucky that the state’s voters thought Colonel Sanders … yes, that Colonel Sanders of KFC fame … would be a better senator than McConnell.

According to Public Policy Polling:
“In spite of KFC’s weak poll numbers Colonel Sanders remains a beloved figure, with 71% of voters seeing him favorably to only 8% with an unfavorable view. In fact they even think Colonel Sanders could be part of the solution to the problems in Washington — by a 47/27 spread voters in the state say they think Colonel Sanders would make for a better US Senator than Mitch McConnell. Too bad he’s dead.”

Yes, folks, the voters of Kentucky, who just reelected Mitch ‘Mock Turtle’ McConnell to office last fall, now say they’d rather have the dead guy who mass-marketed fried chicken as their Senator.

McConnell’s approval rating in the state is 32%.

So why is McConnell in office? People don’t vote. I mean, seriously, it’s that simple. The Democrats sat home and the few measly republicans who did show up got their way, and now the people of Kentucky are whining.

Well, you made this mess, and only you can fix it. Next time there’s an election, put down your phone, turn off your TV, look away from the porn on your computer, and go vote.

Only, maybe don’t vote for the dead chicken guy?
McConnell Photo
Sanders Photo

7 comments:

anne marie in philly said...

match this with the woman who won't issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples in KY and OY! what turds these hillbillies are!

BloggerJoe said...

I'd actually like to see a dead guy elected to congress. If that sails through, we could have an entire congress of dead people who might get something done.

Professor Chaos said...

Hell, I'd vote for a dead guy over McConnell any day!

Professor Chaos said...

Oh! Oh! Darrell Hammond should totally run for Senate in Kentucky

the dogs' mother said...

Zombies?

Anonymous said...

Maybe they think the Colonel is alive because of the impersonator they are using in current KFC commercials.

jadedj said...

Or, they could vote for Ronald McDonald.

Wait...wait...are you telling me McConnell isn't dead? Fooled me.