Tuesday, September 23, 2014

ISBL Asshat of the Week: It's A Tie!! Elisabeth Hasselbeck and Elisabeth Hasselbeck

So, a few months back, when it was announced that her arch nemesis Rosie O’Donnell would be returning to The View, Fox News Talking Air Head, Elisabeth Hasselbeck took time from her vacation to phone in to her pals on Fox & Friends to bemoan Rosie’s return, whine about the comeback, and complain about the new job. It reeked of petty jealousy.

And so how does an insecure wannabe handle it when her new job, which is basically just a retread of every single other Fox News job for the blond set, is set to collide with her old enemy’s return to a more popular TV show?

Well, she decides to go full out crazy in the hopes that people will talk about her, and her little show, and not about Rosie and The View. I mean, how else do we explain that just yesterday on her little TV show Elisabeth Hasselbeck said she would require people take a “citizenship test” before they would be allowed to vote; she says it would make voting “more meaningful.”

It apparently all started when two Republican … naturally … Utah legislators announced a bill that would require students to pass a citizenship test before graduating. And so Hasselbeck decided to up the ante and require a citizenship test to vote:
“Should you have to answer, I mean, the majority of these questions? If not by graduation of high school, but by the time you vote? … It’s a more meaningful measure when you vote perhaps too.”
Hasselbeck should heed her own advice and look back into American history when, as recently as the 1960s, these so-called “literacy” tests were used to disenfranchise black voters during segregation. 

Failing that, I think Hasselbeck should take a test to prove she has at least two active brain cells to rub together before she accepts her ISBL Asshat of the Week Award.

Along with her co-winner … Elisabeth Hasselbeck.

Shortly before announcing her campaign for citizenship tests, Elisabeth Hasselbeck used her perch on Twitter to … wait for it … remember she’s a Republican … wait for it … remember she works for Fox News … wait for it … tie the NFL’s domestic abuse scandals to the Obama administration's handling of the 2012 Benghazi attack on the American Consulate in Libya.

Oh, but she did, Tweeting this:
“Imagine if everyone that asked for transparency in the #nfl @nfl Demanded that same #transparency in our #government #Benghazi #IRS
#STFU.

But is it really such a stretch to compare the bombing of an American Embassy with a man who punched his girlfriend in the face on an elevator, or the man who took a switch and beat his son across the testicles?

Not such a stretch since the people who sign her paycheck, and possibly pay to keep her blond and stupid, Fox News, has devoted hundreds upon hundreds of hours and “journalists — it’s hard to type that without laughing … Fox News journalist — to the alleged cover-up by the White House. And not such a stretch since her husband made quite the lovely living in the NFL.

The only thing that is truly transparent is Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s desperate need for attention, to make herself feel relevant, or even intelligent, because it’s not working.

And that is why she gets the Second ISBL Asshat of the Week Award for the week!

Elisabeth Hasselbeck NFL-Benghazi

7 comments:

the dogs' mother said...

wow! That took some work there. Congrats EH

anne marie in philly said...

somebody needs to fill that pretty mouth with a snowball!

Professor Chaos said...

Jeez, what an embarrassment.

Biki Honko said...

Wow! Benghazi and the NFL in the same tweet! Talk about stretching a point to the breaking point!

The Cool Cookie said...

What a stupid cunt.

www.DiatribesAndOvations.com said...

The only woman on earth who disgusts me more than Elizabeth Hasselbeck is Ann Coulter ... and it's becoming a close race in a really crowded field.

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