Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Mama Grizzly Bore™: Perennial ISBL Asshat

Can you believe it’s been six years since we dodged that bullet, that Double-Barreled Shotgun Blast that could have sent the McCain/Palin ticket to the White House? I mean, bad enough that we’d have Grumpy Grampa McCain perched on the front porch of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue telling the world to get off his lawn, but we could have had the Mama grizzly Bore™ just a heartbeat away from not knowing a single thing she reads as it comes across her desk in the Oval Office.

Whoosh. I got chills just thinking of that American Horror Story!

And then we had the MGB™ hightail it back to Alaska, only to quit because people were asking questions and pointing fingers and, well, it’s too hard, dontcha know. And so I figured she’d go away, and we’d hear nary a peep out of her again, except the minions that follow her, that think she is the Second Coming of … Something, and she came back, tellin’ us that she was gonna work towards making sure Obama was a one-term President.

How’d that work out, Grizzly Bore? Uh huh.

So, then she “wrote” a book and let her single unwed mother of a daughter dance for her life on television, and she kept telling us that she would help every single Republican she could get elected; how’d that work out for you, Christine O’Donnell? Uh huh.

But still, the MGB™ formed a PAC — a Political Action Committee — to raise money for good God-fearing, America-loving, lame-stream media hatin’ Republicans all over the US of A, and, well, how’d that work out?

Well, I’m here to tell you it worked out really good, if your last name is Palin, but it worked out really bad if you’re a Republican running for office.

While the MGB™’s SarahPAC has performed sadly, badly — putting it mildly — as a fundraising machine for the GOP, it has lined the coffers at the Bank of Bore. A report filed with the Federal Election Committee [FEC] showed that, out of $1.4 million the PAC had available in the third quarter — $978,000 in the bank, with another $433,000 raised during that time — SarahPAC donated just $45,000 to fellow Republicans running in the midterms.

That’s 3% for y’all that are math challenged. Three percent. And that’s nothing new; for the two-year 2014 cycle, the former Alaska Quitter’s PAC raised $2.5 million on top of more than $1.1 million that was in the bank at the start of the cycle, and yet it spent some $2.7 million, with about $150,000 — or 5.5 percent — going to candidates.

What happened to all that other money, though, you may wonder.

Well, she paid consultants to advise her on whether she should run for president and possibly all of them told her No; she paid someone to consult on “coalitions” whatever that means. And she paid for travel, her own travel, because how else can she spread the crazy all over the country when she has to pay her own way, pay her own hotel bills, cover the mini-bar peanuts and whatnot.

And the PAC sent $10,885 to HarperCollins — publisher of all three MGB™ books — for “books for donor fulfillment”, though that wasn’t the only book purchase by the committee: $13,000 was listed as being spent for “lodging, SUV rental, books for donors.”

And by donors, we all know she means that brood, and that husband of hers, because why should any of them work when Mama’s got donors handing over cash right and left?

Now, it’s not illegal to create a PAC to raise money for Republicans and elections and then give pennies on the dollar to those causes; there are few rules when it comes to what PACs can spend money on.

It’s just like welfare, you know, for rich, needy, clingy, ex-governors who crash and burn on the political landscape and have no redeeming qualities that anyone needs or wants. It’s a way of living off America and not really working.

It’s everything the Mama Grizzly Bore™ is opposed to, unless it works to her advantage,
And I guess it’s a paltry sum knowing that she will never, ever, be in a political office again because even her minions are growing tired of her squeezing them for coins and giving them nothing back.

Mama Grizzly Bore™, the ISBL Asshat for All Time.


anne marie in philly said...

should this not be investigated by the guvmint as illegal?

the dogs' mother said...

We live in the red part of our blue state. Because the top two finishers go on to the election we have two GOP candidates running to replace our long time GOP Congressman.

Sarah Palin endorsed one of them.

Our paper endorsed the other.

We may be red over here but we're not crazy.

BloggerJoe said...

Does she honestly believe no one notices these things? That no one in America has a memory? The amount of sheer hubris is astonishing.

Professor Chaos said...

Wait, SarahPac is a grift? I am shocked, shocked!!!

Its amazing that someone as stupid as Palin has found people even stupider to swindle.

Helen Lashbrook said...

Capitalism is turning very sour in these recession hit times; corruption is becoming endemic and the 1% sit back and laugh at those of us foolish enough to be indignant at the unfairness of it all

www.DiatribesAndOvations.com said...

I think people are starting to catch on. Soon she'll be sitting on a dusty shelf of history with Honey Boo Boo and the Duck people wondering what happened to all the "fans".

Mitchell is Moving said...

I've been taking great pleasure in the recent apparent train wreck called the Palins. I so hope it continues.