Snarky Thoughts

A week ago we learned Kevin Costner was trying to get out of his Yellowstone contract, and then discovered that his wife, Christine Baumgartner, wanted out of their marriage contract and filed for divorce after eighteen years of marriage. Costner seems to suggest in a statement that he was blindsided by the announcement—sad when the wife doesn’t tell you she wants a divorce before she tells the lawyers, eh? Baumgartner has asked for joint custody of their three children but did not ask for spousal support.

My Thought: Maybe she left him because he’s trying to get out of a very successful TV show and she’s a big fan or likes the coins the show makes … or, as some say, he may have cheated with someone on the set resulting in the other woman getting pregnant.

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At the premiere of his newest film, About My Father, Robert De Niro announced that he’d become a father … again. The father of six welcomed his seventh child—name and gender unknown—at the age of seventy-nine and claimed the pregnancy was “planned.”

My Thought: De Niro “planned” to be one-hundred-years-old on his latest child’s 21st birthday, and planned on his latest child getting to know his, or her, oldest sister, who is fifty-one?

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Shakira‘s been having quite a few years after she found that her longtime boyfriend Gerard Piqué was dipping his peen into one Clara Chia Marti—which sounds like a cocktail—and then followed that mess up with the Spanish government saying she owed back taxes. But that might all change for the … cray-cray ... if we are to believe that Cult of $cientology poster boy Tom Cruise is interested in dating Shakira. 

My Thought: I think Co$ ALLEGEDLY checked Shakira's fan sites, clicked on her picture and then tapped Add To Cart so Tommy would no longer be single and insane. I mean, CO$ will buy Tommy whatever next ex-wife he wants just to keep him happy and in check.

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Suzanne Somers, who clearly needed a way to get her name back out there, is claiming that she was offered—and declined—one of the first co-hosting slots alongside Barbara Walters on “The View” back in 1997:

“I was originally asked to be on the original ‘View’ with Barbara Walters and whoever else, and I turned it down, and everyone said, ‘Why would you turn that down? It is a national show.' I said, ‘First of all, I have to live in New York. I don’t really wanna live in New York … but secondly, I don’t do well vying for time. And there, you gotta interrupt and butt in and butt out. It’s just not my personality.”

My Thought: Huh, she must be a psychic cause how could she know you’d have to “butt in” and “interrupt” people on a show that hadn’t even aired yet?

PS ABC is not commenting on the story and Barbara Walters died in December 2022.

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It’s been a year since Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello called off The Love Affair of the Century and yet neither one has had much success in love—Shawn tried and failed to convince his chiropractor and Mariah Carey—to be his new beard, and Camila added a single season run as a Voice judge. So, what do they do to reignite their failed and faked love lives and careers: they are spotted  making out at Coachella.

My Thought: This will last until one of them has a hit record.

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