Thursday, May 25, 2023


While doing our groceries over the weekend, Carlos stopped me, and whispered:

“Can you get me something?”

“What is it?”

He looks around.

“Preparation H.”

“You got a fire in the hole?”

“Stop that!”

But I can’t, so I jokingly tell him I don’t know where it is in the store so I’ll ask a cashier; then I mimic her on the loudspeaker:

“We have a gentleman in need of Preparation H! What aisle is the Preparation H?”

And then I say once we find it and head the checkout:

“I need a price check on Preparation H? Price check. Preparation H.”

Carlos mutters:

“I hate you.”

But he doesn’t because had the situation been reversed … uh huh.

We have had many, many cats over the years and almost all were good at following the rules; staying off counters and tables; not sitting on certain pieces of furniture. But this one time:

“Rule Breakers

We have rules at Chez Smallville. Cats can get on the beds, on the desk, on the sunroom furniture and on the living room couch. They cannot get on the counters, the tables, the dining room chairs or any of the four new chairs in the living room. And they listen. They know where they can go, and where they cannot.

So, imagine my surprise to walk into the living room and find Tuxedo and MaxGoldberg nesting in a No-No Chair! And look at Max; he's got that Uh-oh face. Tuxedo, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to wake up.

At least not until I yelled Geddownfromthere!

Cat scatter.”

And they never got on those chairs again … at least not while we were home.

The National Association for the Advancement of Colored People [NAACP] has issued a travel advisory for … no, not Ukraine, or Russia, Syria or Iran, China or North Korea … but for the state of Florida. The advisory is a response to Governor DeFacist’s attempts to erase Black history and restrict diversity, equity, and inclusion programs in Florida schools, and read, in part:

“Florida is openly hostile toward African Americans, people of color and LGBTQ+ individuals. Before traveling to Florida, please understand that the state of Florida devalues and marginalizes the contributions of, and the challenges faced by African Americans and other communities of color.”

And now the Human Rights Campaign, the League of United Latin American Citizens, the Florida Immigrant Coalition and Equality Florida have joined the NAACP in advising people to avoid visiting or relocating to the State of Hate.

In America.

Tina Turner. Icon. Diva. Singer. Sex Symbol. Goddess. Survivor. She started out a little rough, and then it got rougher for her, but she came through and persevered and taught us all what it looks like to come out of the darkness and into the light.

RIP ... and thank you for the music and the strength.

A guy goes into a bar where there’s a robot bartender who says:

"What will you have?"

“A martini.”

The robot brings back the best martini ever and asks the man:

"What’s your IQ?"


The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration, and medical technology. The guy leaves, but he is curious, so the next night he goes back to the bar and the robot asks:

"What will you have?"


"What's your IQ?"


The robot then starts to talk about NASCAR, Budweiser, and John Deere tractors. And then the guy leaves but finds it so interesting that returns next night and the robot asks again:

"What will you have?"


“What’s your IQ?"

"Uh, about 55, I think."

The robot leans in real close and says:

"Ain’t it awful the way Joe Biden stole the election?”

Could’a happened and could still be happening.

Marjorie Taylor Greene, Republican Traitor and White Supremacist, was the highest bidder among House Republicans for a cherry “chapstick” used by Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy. Greene made the winning bid for the lip balm after McCarthy sweetened the deal by promising to attend a donor dinner.

And this occurred while McCarthy was ALLEGEDLY negotiating with President Biden over the debt ceiling. If Republicans refuse to raise the debt limit—which they do without a thought under Republican Presidents, but never Democrat Presidents—the US will default on its debt for the first time in history which could drive interest rates sky high, devastate the US and world economies, destroy confidence in the dollar, and permanently increase the interest rate the US spends on its debt.

Yes, while the country appears to be teetering on default, this is what the GOP does. Large Marge and her ilk ick battle over the lip balm KKKevin McCarthy slathers on his mouth before he places it directly on Thing 45's sphincter.

Democrat Representative Sean Casten put it the best:

“In today’s Democratic caucus meeting, we discussed how devastating a default would be for American families and what we can do to get the GOP to take this seriously. In the House GOP meeting, they auctioned off Kevin McCarthy’s used chapstick.”

That’s the GOP; they don’t give a flying fuck if the country is destroyed.

A nice slab of beefcake is Alvise Rigo, an actor, a model,  and an athlete. But all that matters not because all we need to know is: Would You Hit It?


  1. You have me now laughing!!!! Thanks heavens because I just saw Squire John's latest post, so I needed a laugh!!! Your sense of humor sounds like mine!!!! Ask Carlos if the fire is diminishing yet for me, will you? And the joke was even funnier!!! Good one.

    I will never be required and have no desire to ever go to Florida as long as the crazy R's run the state.

    And it figures Mcarthy's lip balm is cherry flavored. I wonder if it leaves a ring around the glory hole?

    And Alvise Rigo seem to be filling out that speedo. It's a huge Yes from me...for a tap.

    1. Carlos says there are just a few embers in the hole ...
      And I agree Alvise knows how to fill out a Speedo!

  2. Anonymous9:15 AM

    the dog's mother
    (Carlos) (kitties)
    Thoughts and prayers to the ballot box!!
    xoxo :-)

    1. I love me some Max and Tuxedo together.

  3. I'm surprised no one has asked just what MTG's going to use that chap stick for... or where, for that matter.

    1. Most likely Dave to kiss trumps fat, old, wrinkly skanky ass!!!!

    2. What Maddie said ... also because that's the same thing Kevin used it for.

  4. Poor Carlos. I'm thinking he had to have known what your reaction would be, but still. :)
    Cats will be cats. Those two looked pretty cozy.
    I do hope that the tweet will be shared and come to fruition at the ballot box. The news that DeSantis has now entered the race (formally) is down right frightening.

    1. Yes, Carlos knows but sometimes he forgets ...
      Those two boys were the best cats ever,
      DeFascist is scary because he's got Florida follow his lead, though I like to believe America is smarter than Flori-duh!

  5. Ok, so between us squirrellfriends: I know someone who always buys PrepH when we go to the drugstore. I asked why. The answer? Undereye puffiness (poof! it's gone). TMYK right?
    And Tux looking for a fuck to give is glorious.
    Alvise is delicious. The answer is yes, please.

    And the Repugs will make Flori-duh a hellhole. Good.
    The joke? Priceless. I may steal it.


    1. I agree about the Prep H!!!! It's been needed many a time for the day after mornings from hang overs and drag shows. But let's not let Carlos know. We enjoy Bob's heckling.

    2. I've heard The H is good for puffy eyes but Carlos' use was a little lower and around the back!
      Tuxedo knew he had won that round!
      Steal away with the jokes!

  6. I thought you were joking when you said the Repugnant party were auctioning off McCarthy's lip balm. Sadly you were not. The Repugnants reach yet another low, followed by Margarine demanding decorum in the chamber.

    I have seen THAT look many a time from our cats when they are doing something they are not supposed to. Like the time Alexander was on the kitchen counter because he couldn't resist the smell of a dead hare waiting to be cooked. He just couldn't resist the alluring scent, any more than dogs can.

    1. It IS a joke that this is what the GOP does with a debt ceiling crises looming.
      I like MaxGoldberg looking worried and Tuxedo looking like he hasn't a care!

  7. I would never do that to San Geraldo, although he wouldn’t care. And I'm grateful he would never do that to (appropriately in this case) anal-retentive me. When we were visiting Spain looking for a place to live, he actually went into the pharmacy for me and asked for whatever they used here for the problem. I wrote it down for him because he spoke no Spanish. I was mortified and stood on the sidewalk. We were together 29 years at the time and I think it was the first time I ever even told him I was having a problem. Amazingly, I'll telling you about it here. Times have changed. I’d probably even laugh, come to think of it, if he did that to me now. I went on too long on that subject. The cats are a riot. Our California cats weren’t allowed on any hard surfaced furniture. They were perfect angels (except when we weren’t there). Dudo and Moose have more freedom. No tables and no countertops. We then gave up on the tables. Dudo only goes on the countertop now when we turn out backs. We usually wake up in the morning and find paw prints on the cooktop. Alvise Rigo? Oh my god, Yes.

    1. I just love that Carlos knows me so well and yet will still ask a question like that knowing my childish brain and mouth will react inappropriately.
      Our cats were, and are [Consuelo] pretty good, but then when we weren't home? All bets off.
      I would like to climb Mt Alvise.

  8. The robot bartender, LOL!

    1. With all this AI stuff, it could happen ....

  9. Bid on and bought a USED chapstick??? Ugh!! Not to mention the hubris of the seller.

    1. Add to that the fact they do this while supposedly working at a job where WE THE PEOPLE pay them!

  10. If you ever come up missing, and the cats suddenly gain 20 pounds each, we will know you went too far. Floriddah is on my no travel list.

  11. The Republicans auctioned off a used Chapstick?! That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard.

    If I weren't related to people in Florida I'd never set foot in that state again. At least, not until it rethinks its politics.


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