I walked into the kitchen on Monday morning where Carlos was making our Cafe con eche and watching the news, and he says …
“Meghan got knocked down.”
“Who is Meghan?”
“Who knocked her down?”
“Harry. They’re having a baby.”
“I think you mean she’s knocked up.”
And so it goes. I;m Lucy and he's Ricky.
Dear Elizabeth Warren,
There never really was much of a chance I’d be thrilled to see you run for president. After you sank to _____’s level of playing mean girls on Twitter in 2016 rather than taking him on politically, I wrote you off.
And yet, here you are again, dredging up a two-year-old feud where he claimed you don’t have Native American heritage. So, you took a DNA test to prove it and you think that makes you qualified for POTUS?
Think again. Take a seat. I’m looking for someone to change the course of this country, not reignite petty feuds with a little man.
Michael Kalny, topleft, a Republican who holds the elected position of precinct committeeman in Kansas is under fire for a social media post in which he called Sharice Davids, top right, a Democrat and an openly gay Native American lawyer running to unseat Republican Kevin Yoder in Congress a "radical socialist kick boxing lesbian Indian" in a Facebook rant to Anne Pritchett, president of the Johnson County Democratic Women’s north chapter:
"Little Ms. Pritchett – you and your comrades stealth attack on Yoder is going to blow up in your leftist face. The REAL REPUBLICANS will remember what the scum DEMONRATS tried to do to Kavanaugh in November. Your radical socialist kick boxing lesbian Indian will be sent back packing to the reservation."
And the GOP demands civility from us?
“Firefighter Prophet” but I call him a lunatic of epic proportions. He claims, among other things, that Democrats, with the help of Barack Obama, are using weather control technology to obstruct _____’s agenda.
Yes, he did; earlier this month, Taylor claimed Hurricane Florence to cover up mass voter fraud in North Carolina. In June, he said liberals were planning to to suppress the midterm election turn out. And lest week he claimed Hurricane Michael was artificially created by “scared” anti-_____ forces in “retaliation” for Justice Penis In Your Face’s confirmation to the Supreme Court:
“Does anyone else think it’s strange that Justice K is sworn in and we have a major hurricane inbound? DS scared? They should be. Retaliation? Absolutely. We will not be intimidated! Warriors arise, time to go to work! You know what to do.”
Seriously. Can someone put him in a seventy-two hour hold and have his head examined?
We were going to buy a new car this past weekend, and after breakfast I told Carlos I’d clean out all of our personal items so we could trade it in, and he said he’d get the title and off we’d go.
I keep the car clean so there wasn’t much to take out and as I went back to the office to find Carlos, I see him sitting at the desk, papers scattered everywhere, and he says,
“Where’s the title?”
Yes. He did. So, I looked in the file he’d created for the car and, yep, no title; but there were all kinds of other papers, such as a five-year-old receipt for an oil change.
That we keep; the title? Not so much.
Needles to say, we've applied for a replacement title, that will arrive in 7 to ten, or thirty, days..
In yet another blatant lie, and in another use of fear top inspire his illiterate, gun-toting, cousin-fucking, hypocritical Bible-thumping, adultery loving, toothless brain-dead base—and sorry to say that but if they’re gonna believe his shiz, then I will call them as I see them—_____ lied about a non-existent democratic bill he claims was written by Senator Dianne Feinstein:
"Today's Democrats have embraced radical socialism and open borders. If you don't have borders, you don't have a country, folks, you don't have a country. Every single Democrat in the US Senate has signed up for the Open Borders - and it's a bill! It's called the Open Borders Bill! What's going on? And it's written by - guess who - Dianne Feinstein."
There is no bill. It’s a bald-faced lie. But, hey, stoke the fear, asshat.
That woman featured in a viral video preventing a Saint Louis man from entering his apartment building has been fired from her job.
Although her name has yet to be made public—oops, here it is … Hilary Brooke Mueller—but I call her #LobbyLinda, tried to keep from entering his apartment building because she was, ahem, uncomfortable.
In other words, he was a black man. But Toles recorded the incident on his cellphone and posted it top social media and, quicker than you can say, Racist, shut up, the woman was fired after her bosses at the apartment building, Tribeca Luxury Apartments in St. Louis, identified the racist as an employee.
Sorry, not sorry.
The GOP, and _____, will be the first to tell you how inclusive the party is, and how the blacks just love them, but … Michael Steele, the party’s first African-American chairman was not invited to an event honoring the achievements of prominent black Republicans.
Oh, this is killing me … _____ saw a painting of himself having drinks with Abraham Lincoln, Richard Nixon, Gerald Ford, Teddy Roosevelt, the Bush’s and Ronald Reagan so much that he called the artist on the phone and then put a print of it in the White House.
Seriously. “The Republican Club” by Andy Thomas was on display during Leslie Stahl’s interview with _____.
It’s funny that he’d hang it, but what’s funnier is that the artist painted him in human colors and about 100 pounds lighter than real life.
It kills me!
Dennis Haysbert. That’s pretty much all. I have always found him to be quite attractive, whether he’s playing a president on TV or selling me insurance.
Years ago, we went to see Far From Heaven because Dennis Quaid kissed a guy in the movie, and he liked it. But it was Haysbert, as the gardener whom Julianne Moore falls for, who I noticed straight away.
And that voice? Dreamy.