Thursday, March 16, 2017

Random Musings

Carlos teaches a class after work on Thursdays, so I usually get home from work myself, make a little dinner, peruse the interwebz, and then go pick him up around 8PM.

Last Thursday was no different except ... as I got into my car, I did my usual routine, I clicked the garage door opener, I turned on the car, I fastened my seatbelt and turned on some tunes; and then I did something different; I got my cell phone from the center console to call Carlos and tell him I was on my way.

Then I back out ... and the automatic garage door opener either decided to only open the door part of the way or it decided to open the door all of the way and then lower it as I was backing out.

Crash.Shatter. Luckily, it was just the rear window and no damage to the car or the door. And luckily we have very good insurance which covered the replacement window for no charge, and it was replaced at home while we were at work on Tuesday.

And an upside? Well, apparently there’s a glitch in the Saturn VUE wherein the cargo door will not open using the keyless device. And, get this, there is no way to open the cargo door without the keyless device. There is no hatch button inside the car; there is no button on the inside of the cargo door; and there is no lock in the door in which to insert a key. We have researched how to fix this issue and it’s quite complicated except ...

For some reason when the window in the cargo door was replaced now the door opens again with the keyless device.

At least for now ... so I’m still calling it a win-win.
In New Hampshire, it’s perfectly legal for a man to marry a 13-year-old girl and now, thanks to the state’s GOP for voting down a bill to raise the marriage age, it’ll stay that way.

The current legal marriage age allows 13-year-old girls and 14-year-old boys to marry as long as they have consent from their parents and a judge signs off on it but still, why would lawmakers wish to keep that on the books?

They want to help soldiers. What the what?

The GOP argued that the age increase would block young soldiers from getting married and providing military benefits to their partners or children. Others said the change could lead to more single-parent households.

Hey GOP? If you wanna help soldiers, howsabout helping them not to go to war, or, failing that, helping them when they come back home, wounded and battle scarred, to assimilate back into public life? Howsabout fixing the VA?

Asshats; the lot of them.
You just can’t make-out anywhere these days.

Timothy and Noah were “passionately making out” near an apartment complex dumpster when they were interrupted by the complex’s assistant manager. So, the two men, startled out of their ardor, punched her in the head before she could escape to her car. One of the men banged on the windows and threatened to kill her.

The two men were arrested, of course, and told police officers they were high on pot and mushrooms.

Poor Timothy and Noah Batz ... same last name? A married couple?

Nope, they’re brothers. And now I need a Silkwood scrubdown.
Last Friday it was a glorious 85 degrees in Smallville. The azaleas were blooming, the trees were leafing out, the daffodils were pushing up from the earth.

Sunday it was 25 and it snowed. Not a lot, i know, but still ...

Good thing there’s no such thing as Climate Change, eh, GOP?
Newly out and proud It Boy, Colton Haynes is now newly out and proud engaged to be married, to his boyfriend, florist to the stars, Jeff Leatham.

Leatham popped the question while the two men were in Los Cabos, Mexico, and had a little help from ... Cher! Leatham began the romantic moment with a video from Cher singing their favorite song after she said to the happy couple:
“So, I got you babe! Alright, this is for you, you know what it is, you know what you’re supposed to do now and this is gonna be the best thing ever and you have to call me to tell me how it worked out, alright!”
That video was followed by video messages from their family members and close friends, and after Colton said “Yes!” there were fireworks set to Bruno Mars’ ‘Marry You’ as the couple danced.

This was my proposal: Carlos looked at me and said, “We oughta get married, you wanna?” And I said, “I guess so, what’s on TV?"

Or something like that.  I kid, but congratulations to the happy couple!
So, suddenly he’s everywhere and I don’t know who he is ... Jai Courtney, top. He’s an Aussie actor best known for action films, sci-fi and looking like a brick sh*thouse. I’m intrigued.

I’m also intrigued by Trevante Rhodes, bottom, one of the stars of Moonlight and a star of a new Calvin Klein underwear ad.

I’m just plain intrigued ... and a little hot’n’bothered.
Take note of the above map ... if your state has a red X in it, then there will be major local, state or federal elections this year, and this is where the Resistance comes together.

You know what to do ... send _____ a message that his election was a mistake and We The People are no longer playing.

Check out and vote, dammit.

The other morning, Minister of Propaganda Kellyanne Conway was on GMA and was asked this question:
“Do you believe Obama wiretapped _____ Tower?”
And she responded like this:
“There are all kinds of ways to surveil people.”
I shrieked—it was early in the morning so, yeah, I shrieked—at the TV:
Later on that morning, I asked Carlos:
“Do you want to ...”
blibbety-blah-blay-blue I have forgotten what I asked him, but I remember his reply:
“We could.”
I said:
“What kind of answer is that to a Yes or No question?”
“I’m just saying, we could ...”
I realized I’m married to a Kellyanne Clone.

I’m having her deprogrammed as we speak.
So, that movie theater in Alabama that won’t show Beauty and the Beast because of The Gay is not alone; now the entire country of Malaysia, through their film censorship board, announced that they would like Disney to cut the “gay” scene because in Malaysia scenes promoting homosexuality are forbidden.

Disney said, “No.”

Good on the Mouse.
Joe Barton, a Republican ... because of course ... from Texas ... because of course ... was holding a Town Hall in his district recently when one of his constituents asked if Barton would work with Rep. Jackie Speier, a Democrat, to sponsor legislation combating violence against women; Barton is a Republican who voted against the Violence Against Women Act. The constituent said:
“Given your voting record opposing legislation protecting women from violence, will you make a commitment to us today, make a promise that you will reach out to Congresswoman Jackie Speier and work with her to see this bill successfully through Congress?”
Barton said he voted ‘No’ because he believes violence against women is a “state issue, not a federal issue” and that was met with a chorus of boos.

A man in the crowd stood up and shouted:
“Violence against women, that’s a national issue! That’s an issue that impacts everyone everywhere, not only in this country, but everywhere!”
And Barton, pointing his finger at that man, yelled:
“You, sir, shut up.”
That did not make his audience happy:
“You don’t tell anybody to shut up! You work for us!”
Not for much longer, I hope.


Anonymous said...

I don't understand. Are boys allowed to enlist at 14, and if so, why? Or are grown men allowed to marry 13 year old girls just because they are in the military. Looks like New Hampshire is trying to be a haven for pedophiles. My granddaughter will turn 12 tomorrow and the idea of her being married the next year is incredibly horrendous!

Now the batty Batz brothers, just eeeewwwww!

Hey Bob, if Carlos buys a new microwave it would probably be for the best if you refrain from any sexytimes in the kitchen!


Debra She Who Seeks said...

I probably shouldn't tell you this, but My Rare One once backed out of the garage thinking, of course, that the garage door was open. It wasn't. That's what menopause does to the brain.

mistress maddie said...

Boy, what a way to get the Saturn backdoor fixed!!!!

I have always liked Colton.....i hope he will be happy.

And the two brothers!?!?!?!?! And they blamed it on the drugs.

the dogs' mother said...

So I went to the election site. Then I went to the WA state site. Yes, we have a Special Election on April 25. NOWHERE did it say WHY! I've had issues with WA state voter info before so it was not surprising. Thankfully now we are a vote by mail state so it will tell me when the ballot arrives here...

BloggerJoe said...

How do you know Jai is a top and Trevante is a bottom? Cite your sources, man!

anne marie in philly said...

yeah, we are one of them thar red X states. you can bet yer sweet ass RTG and I are voting!

who is standing on the back deck in the snow pix - you or carlos?

is it just me, or is everyone in TX a stooped asshole?

Toni said...

Dang, what a post, dude! Now I need a xanax. So I'm gathering that in the state of New Hampshire the penalty for members of the military (because I am 'asssuming they're at least 18) is marriage?

This country is really f'up!

Mitchell is Moving said...

Sorry. I say I would like to be the first to nix the idea of a Trump Salad.

Professor Chaos said...

If I can't marry a 13 year old, why would I even join the army?

Bob Slatten said...

@Blogger Joe
That's exactly what I was thinking as I typed that!

That's Carlos!

Helen Lashbrook said...

In the UK sex with ANYONE age under 16 is statutory rape and that is if they consent!